Ethan nodded. “Got it.”
“Maybe we should get a cat,” Isaac said thoughtfully, he turned to Ethan. “We can name it Isis or something, to match Hades.”
“You might want to ask your mom first,” Miles warned them before taking a bite out of his sandwich.
“As if she would say no,” Asher said. “She’d adopt every animal in the pound if she could.”
Asher held up his bag of chips and looked at Isaac. Isaac, with his mouth full, nodded and traded his bag of chips for Asher’s.
“We’ll have to ask tonight,” Isaac agreed. “Of course, if we come across a stray cat before then…”
“Ask your mom first,” I told him. The twins smirked and shared a look.
My smile dimmed as I thought about this afternoon. I was going to have to tell them. I set my sandwich down, my appetite gone. What was I going to say to them?
I was trying to find the best way to tell them when Zeke growled, “Lexie, eat.” I blinked and looked up. He had his don’t-argue-with-me look on his face. Which was nothing new really, but he was right. I picked up my sandwich and forced myself to finish my lunch.
I had just put my trash in my bag when my phone rang. It was Ryan.
“Hello.”
“Hey, it’s Ryan.” His voice was uncertain.
“How’s it going?” I asked cheerfully. I was acutely aware that the table had grown quiet and everyone was watching me.
“I was wondering if you’d meet me at the coffee house after school?” he asked. “I want to apologize for Friday night.”
I got up from the table and walked just out of earshot of everyone but Asher. “You already apologized. You don’t need to do it again.”
“Yeah, I really do,” he insisted. I sighed as I looked at the twins. There was no way I was bailing on them, even if I wanted to avoid that conversation.
“I actually already have plans this afternoon. But I can meet you now,” I offered. The sooner this was done with the sooner I could focus on other things.
“Yeah, okay, um, I’ll meet you by the picnic tables near the trailer class rooms?” he suggested, his voice nervous.
“Okay, I’ll see you in a few minutes.” I hung up the phone and went back to the table.
“What did Ryan want?” Asher asked.
“He wants to apologize about last Friday.” I picked up my bag. Asher and Zeke got up and grabbed their bags. “Guys.” They looked down at me. “I think I can go alone on this one.”
That got everyone’s attention. After all, going out alone at home was different than going through the crowded halls at school.
“Are you sure?” Miles asked gently.
“Yeah, I think so,” I said. “I actually did pretty well in the hall waiting for Asher. I want to try a test run.” Asher sat back down.
Zeke met my eyes. “You have a problem-”
“I’ll call immediately,” I promised. He sighed deeply then sat down. “I’ll see you guys after school. And Ash, I’ll see you before art class.” There were murmured sounds of agreement before I walked away down the hall.
What the hell was I going to say to him? Apparently, he liked me, I could tell that much at least from the kiss Friday night. How did I not see that coming? I thought over my time with Ryan. At practices, at Vegabond, at school. I guess there were small signs here and there, but... I shook my head and walked out of the hallways towards the classroom trailers.
A few minutes later, I was waiting for Ryan on top of one of the picnic tables with a soda for him. I made the guy feel horrible the least I could do was buy him a soda.
Ryan came out from another hallway to the right. He spotted me then headed over with his hands in his pockets. There were heavy bags under his eyes. Guilt hit me hard, gnawing my stomach.
“I made sure not to wear my cologne,” he told me when he got within ear shot.
“Thanks, I appreciate that,” I said quietly before pointing at his soda on the table. “I didn’t know if you liked Cola or Pepsi so I took a shot in the dark.” He picked up the soda can and sat on the table next to me.
“You didn’t need to do that,” he said quietly.
“I made you feel bad,” I said, looking down at the cement. “It’s the least I could do to apologize.”
He scoffed, “You made me feel bad? Damn it, Lexie.” He took a deep breath. “You had a flashback. Because of me.” He looked down at the ground, his face pained.
“Not because of you,” I told him. “It was your cologne. Clay…” I sighed as I looked down at my hands dangling between my knees. I was trying to say the right thing here and it wasn’t easy. “He hurt me, a lot and to do that, he had to be really close. And the whole time, I could smell that cologne.” I looked over and met his eyes. “It really wasn’t you.”
His jaw clenched and unclenched. “Lexie, you didn’t have a flashback until I kissed you.”
I looked away to the hallways watching other kids walking by.
“You surprised me,” I said quietly, peeling the label from the water bottle in my hands. “We learned over the last few months that I can’t be touched by surprise. I have to see it coming or know who it is first.” I looked back down at the ground. “I didn’t expect it.”
“Fuck, Lexie, what did he do to you?” he breathed with feeling. I turned and shot him an angry look. His face was pained and angry. He looked ready to kill someone. My anger melted away. He didn’t realize what he was asking, how personal it really was. I looked back out at the people walking by.
“Not what you’re probably thinking,” I said quietly. “He beat the shit out of me. Gave me a skull fracture. Things like that.” I shrugged, my thumb nail working at scraping off the label still.
He cursed. “I shouldn’t have asked that. I’m sorry,” he said earnestly, rubbing his eyes with one hand.
“It’s okay. You didn’t know.” And it was okay. I realized I was talking about what happened to someone who wasn’t one of my best friends, who wasn’t my shrink, or Rory. And I was okay. I wasn’t crying, I wasn’t panicking, I wasn’t ashamed or feeling dirty. I was okay. I held that to my heart. I was healing, it was taking time but it was a sign. I was healing.
“Is that why the guys walk you to class every day?” he asked.
“Yeah. I have trouble with crowded places,” I admitted. “You know what the halls are like, everyone runs into everybody.”
“Yeah, I get that,” he said gently. “You hit me pretty hard though.” He tried to make a joke of it. I winced.
“Sorry. I didn’t know it was you, Ryan,” I explained. “In that moment, you weren’t you. You were him. I wasn’t at the lake anymore, I was back at the cabin.” I looked up to meet his eyes. He gave me a small smile.
“I’m sorry I surprised you.” He looked back at the people walking by. “I… thought you knew that I liked you.” My stomach knotted worse. This was the part I was hoping to avoid.
“I didn’t,” I admitted.
“Damn, I must have been too subtle.” He shook his head before turning to look at me.
“Lexie, I want to take you out. You know, on an actual date.”
I bit the corner of my bottom lip as I figured out what to say. I didn’t want to insult him or make him feel bad. But I wasn’t interested and I didn’t want to lead him on.
“Ryan. You are a great guy. You’re fun, sweet, cute as hell, and incredible on the drums.” He looked down at the ground, crestfallen. I hurried to add, “Any other time, I would say yes and we’d go out and probably have a great time.” He looked up and met my eyes. “But right now, with what happened, and where I am in dealing with that… I’m not even thinking of dating. I’m sorry.”
He took a deep breath and let it out. Then he gave me that killer grin of his. “I figured that, but I had to try,” he said. His face turned serious. “Whenever you do get to where you are ready, keep me in mind?”
I smiled. “I will.” If I was over my best friends by then, sure. He really was
a great guy.
He gave me a smile and got to his feet. “Alright, I’m going to take off. Thanks for the soda,” he said, then pointed over my shoulder. “By the way, did you know Zeke is here?”
I turned and looked where he was pointing. In the hallway was Zeke’s hulking figure leaning against the wall.
“Seriously?” I shouted. What the hell was I going to do with him? Busted, he headed towards us as Ryan chuckled.
“You didn’t know?” He had a big smile now. “I’ll leave you to yell at him. Bye, Lexie.”
“Bye.” Ryan walked off. I turned around on the tabletop to watch Zeke as he walked towards me. When he was close enough to see I wasn’t happy I asked, “Zeke, what the hell are you doing?”
“I was making sure he behaved,” he all but growled.
“Zeke.”
“He kissed you Friday night,” he bit out. “You had a flashback. I have the right to be worried.” I went still. Did he have the right because he was my friend? Or because of our kiss?
“And why’s that?” I asked, wondering if I was going to get an answer. He straightened and ran his hand through his hair.
“I’m dealing with my own shit right now, Lexie,” he said gruffly. I went still. That sounded exactly like what I had told Ryan.
“Oh,” I said softly as it hit me. My chest ached. “You could have just told me you thought it was a mistake.”
His eyes flashed at me before he looked away. “That’s not what I said,” he said quietly.
“I just said the same thing to Ryan so I wouldn’t hurt his feelings by turning him down, it’s true, but it’s the same thing,” I told him as I climbed down off the tabletop. When I looked up at him again, he was scowling.
He met my eyes. “I say exactly what I mean to,” he reminded me, his voice hard. “That is not what I said.” My chest loosened under the fire in his eyes, my pulse picked up for the second time in months.
“Okay, that’s not what you meant.” I eyed him. “Do you want to talk about what’s bothering you?”
He shook his head. “Not yet.”
The bell rang.
“I’ll be here.”
His eyes were shadowed as they ran over me. “You have gym now, right?”
“Yeah.” It wasn’t a surprise that he had my class schedule memorized.
“Are you okay with me walking you? Or do you want to go on your own?” he asked, his voice tense.
I thought about it. “I could use the company,” I hedged.
The corner of his lips twitched. “Come on, let’s get you to class.”
Chapter 10
Tuesday Afternoon
The drive to the twins’ house seemed like it took longer than it should have. It sure as hell didn’t feel like five minutes. My stomach was knotted with dread as I walked into the house.
The twins were in the family room, sitting on the couch and pulling out their books for homework. I doubted any of us would get any done today.
“Hey,” I said as I set down my bag next to the stairs. The twins looked up.
“Thank God, the Ghostbuster has arrived,” Ethan said dramatically. “Do me a favor; when you cross this one, drop him on his head.” Ooh, yeah, he was going to regret saying that.
I gave him a tense smile. “After the others get here,” I hedged.
Ethan eyed me. “Why wait for the others? You’re the badass with the dead,” he said, pulling out his binder.
“I crossed twenty-one this morning, so, I don’t know what the fallout will be,” I explained. “And if Zeke wasn’t here…”
“She’s got a point,” Isaac said.
“Yeah, but it would irk the hell out of him,” Ethan muttered, looking down into his bag.
I smiled and stayed near the walk through. I crossed my arms over my stomach, hugging myself a bit. I started tapping my fingers against my arm.
The front door opened. Asher walked in, his face just as somber as I felt. He gave me a sad smile as he squeezed my shoulder before going into the family room. He took one of the overstuffed chairs as we waited.
I couldn’t sit down. Not with the bombshell I was about to drop. I moved to the window and watched the traffic on the street. The world seemed like it had slowed down, or maybe that was wishful thinking because Zeke and Miles pulled up minutes later.
They walked up the walkway. When they spotted me, I gave them a small wave. They were stepping on the porch and then into the foyer.
I was really going to have to tell them.
My chest was tight as I moved away from the window to stand in front of the TV. My stomach hard as a rock.
Miles gave me an encouraging look as he passed me to sit next to Isaac on the couch. Zeke met my eyes before he sat in the armchair with its back to the foyer.
When everyone was seated, they looked to me. Everyone except the twins. They were bitching about homework.
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly through the tightness in my chest. God, help me say the right thing. I didn’t know if I was praying or not. I just knew I’d take any help I could get right now.
“Ethan, Isaac,” I said, my voice tense. They looked up from their homework. “Put the books down, we need to talk.” Ethan looked around to see that no one else had opened their backpacks. They both set down their books.
“About what?” Isaac asked.
“It’s about the ghost in your house.”
Ethan’s eyes narrowed on me as I twisted my fingers together. “What about it? It’s a normal ghost, right? Not a rotted out one?”
“Yeah it’s… the ghost told me on Friday it was wanting to cross soon,” I explained.
Isaac gave me a confused look. “What’s the problem? Go cross the sucker.”
“It’s not that easy.” I swallowed hard as I looked at them both. With my heart pounding in my throat, I told them. “Your ghost… it’s Sophie.”
The world froze as the tension in the room jumped, the twins grew still. Ethan’s face turned to stone. Isaac’s had gone white. The only sound was my racing pulse in my ears.
“Sophie?” Ethan asked, his eyes storming.
“Yes.” I took another calming breath.
“How long have you known?” Ethan asked through his teeth, his entire body rigid. His gaze was scorching, I fought to keep eye contact. He couldn’t hide from this, neither could I.
“Since December,” I answered quietly. Miles reached out and rested his hand on Isaac’s shoulder. Isaac seemed shell shocked.
“So…” Ethan began, his voice shaking with anger. “Our little sister has been in our house for, how long?”
“Since the ghost stuff started happening,” Zeke said as Isaac held his head in his hands, his fingers digging into his scalp. Miles started whispering to him.
Ethan got off the couch and moved towards the walk through, then turned back to us. His fists clenched, his body shaking with tension. “You all knew?” Ethan bit out.
Asher leaned forward. “Lexie told us, she didn’t know what to do-”
“You all fucking knew,” Ethan growled. “And you didn’t say a fucking word!”
Isaac started shaking his head, he shoved Miles away, burst to his feet and headed for the foyer. “Cross her over.” Isaac’s voice cracked as he walked by. Miles got up and followed him. A door slammed open upstairs.
Ethan looked at us with disgust. “How could you fucking keep that from us?” His voice was full of pain. Banging continued upstairs.
My eyes burned. “There was nothing I could do at the time-”
“You could have fucking said something!” he shouted. Asher got to his feet and opened his mouth. Ethan pointed at him, his hand shaking. “Don’t you even...” He growled then turned back to me. “Go cross her now!"
Heavy steps sounded on the stairs. Isaac came down with a duffle bag over his shoulder. “I’ll be back after she’s gone,” Isaac called over his shoulder before he went out the door. Miles followed him. Zeke and Asher both went out after them
. When Ethan turned back to me his eyes were wild.
I tried again through the knot in my throat. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re sorry? You have been lying to us for months!” he shouted. He shook his head. “I don’t know you. The Lexie I know wouldn’t have kept one of the most important people in our lives a secret.” He turned around and headed for the front door. “Stay the fuck away from me and my brother!” he yelled before slamming the door shut behind him.
The silence was thick and heavy. I dropped into an armchair, tears streaming down my face. I couldn’t breathe, burning pain tore through my chest. What the fuck was I going to do? I knew they wouldn’t take it well, but I never expected…
My phone rang. It was Miles.
“Ethan left,” I told him.
“I know, I see him heading to the car. Isaac’s already inside,” Miles said. “Are you alright?”
“Just follow them, Miles. Take care of them for me.” I asked as I wiped my face. A car door closed in the back ground.
“I will. But… this is just shock, Lexie,” he told me. An engine started. “You understand that, right?”
“Yeah.” I sniffed and took a deep breath. “You can’t talk and drive, just, all of you stay safe.” That chill ran down my neck.
“We will,” he assured me. I hung up the phone and went to the stairs, slipping my onyx bracelets on as I went.
Sophie was sitting on the steps, tears running down her face.
“It’s just shock, Sophie.” I tried to reassure her, but my own heart felt like it was breaking. How the hell could I help her? Sophie nodded.
“They’ll come through,” she assured me. “They always do.”
“I’ll go see what I can to do to help loosen his pull,” I said. She was silent as I turned and left the house, locking it behind me. When I climbed into the Blazer I was ready to kill someone.
I needed answers and Serena better fucking give them to me this time or I was going to tear her apart.
Asher
“Where the hell did they go?” Zeke growled as he took the turn too fast.
“I don’t know!” I snapped, pulling out my phone to call Miles. The twins had sped through a yellow light an hour ago, forcing us to stop while they moved on.
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