Arne sighed, and his voice became less confrontational. “If you could see just a glimpse of the way she cared for you this morning, Henry, you wouldn’t have been able to let her walk out that door.” Henry looked up. “It was one thing in the middle of the night—mending your wounds and cleaning you up when she was a mess herself, reassuring you she would never leave and that you would be all right; pulling a blanket over you and lying by your side. All in your beast form, mind you. But it was something quite different in the morning light. She doesn’t know I saw, Henry, but I’ve never seen anything so moving. I’ve never seen anyone care for another soul the way she cared for you, or as much love in someone’s eyes. She pled for you to return to her. You don’t remember, but she gave you everything last night.”
Henry’s heart was so heavy it stole his breath. It hurt so badly all he wanted to do was give into it, to the way he loved her and the way he wanted to protect her from all things. But he would always hate himself no matter how much she loved him, because he didn’t deserve her. If she needed protecting from anyone, it was him. “I made her leave because it’s what’s best for her. She…doesn’t know what she sees,” he finished, less convincingly.
“She knows exactly what she sees. Henry…” Arne clenched his teeth. “You’re making the biggest mistake of your life. I know this is impossible for you to believe, but she saw something in you worth loving—something you haven’t allowed anyone to see in years. And here you are, walking away from it. No, shoving it away. She loves you. Hell, she would risk her life for you. And you know what?”
Cautiously, Henry lifted his eyes.
“You’re right about one thing: you don’t deserve her, not like this. But the real you—the one who can give up the charade and accept the gift you’ve been given—he does. That Henry needs to chase her down. Soon too, because you may have just lost her forever, like you think you want.”
Henry lacked the motivation to argue, every ounce of his fight depleted.
“I know you ache for her, Henry. I know you need her, far more than she needs you.”
Lying on the couch, the wooziness made the chandelier spin above. Arne patted him on the leg. “It’s time to pull the stick out of your ass now. You’re just going to have to accept that it’s more than me who cares about you.”
Chapter 24
Elizabeth meandered up Clayton Road, nearing Henry Street. She didn’t know why she bothered. Not only was the day halfway through, but it had only been yesterday she’d lost every customer. But Jean’s was all she had now, and she would run it until she couldn’t anymore. Besides, baking and coffee-making was something to keep her mind from Henry, from the way he’d banished her from his house—and from him—only an hour before.
Her steps came to a halt when she spotted Regina, walking her way. Elizabeth picked up her pac and took a deep breath, meeting her at Jean’s door. And before Elizabeth could think appropriate words, Regina’s arms were around her, squeezing so tightly Elizabeth wondered if she was trying to be hostile.
“Oh, honey,” she exhaled. “You scared me half to death.”
“Scared you?”
“You’re safe,” she said, almost to herself. Her molasses-colored forehead shimmered. “You are safe, aren’t you? You’re all right?”
“Of course I’m all right. Why on earth wouldn’t I be?”
“We heard those awful noises last night and when you weren’t here this morning, my mind went crazy.”
“You…came this morning?”
Regina’s eyes were sheepish, glazed in apologies. “I had to make sure you were okay. I’m sorry, Beth. I feel awful about walking out the other day. I didn’t mean it that way. I don’t think anyone did.”
A brow lifted of its own free will. “How did everyone mean it?”
“We’re all worried about you. Speaking for myself—and I ain’t gonna lie—it’s hard for me to accept the way you…defend it.” She sighed. “But I got to. Because I ain’t gonna lose you over a silly difference of opinion. So…” Her eyes took on a puppy-dog appearance. “You’ll forgive me?”
“Of course,” Elizabeth said. Regina hugged her again, her groan the very definition of relief. When she pulled away, Elizabeth asked, “Now, can I make you coffee already? You may be my only customer from here on out.”
“They’ll come around. In fact, Eustace was looking for you earlier—this morning, when everyone was being accounted for. Where were you? You had us real worried, especially Sheriff Taggart.”
“I was…” Elizabeth started, nonchalantly making sure her long shirt sleeve covered her arm. “In bed. I must have missed your call. Plus, after having no customers yesterday, I didn’t think I needed to rush in.”
“You didn’t hear the noises?”
“What noises did you hear exactly?”
“Oh, terrible ones. There was the usual growling, but…it was louder, a lot more vicious. And that screaming…Sheriff Taggart’s been roaming the forest all morning, making sure there weren’t any deaths. It was awful, gave us the chills up our spines.”
Elizabeth inserted the key in the lock and pulled back as she turned; even that reminded her of Henry. Regina followed her inside, and before she could put her apron on, Eustace slammed through the door.
“Dagnabbit, Beth!” With breaths labored and chew in his mouth, he lifted his hands. “You had us all worried sick!”
“I’m…sorry, Eustace, I was just sleeping in this morning. Didn’t see a need to come in early like usual.”
With a hand on his hip, he narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “Sure, sure.”
“Look, Eustace.” She tied her apron behind her back then freed her hair from beneath the strap. “I’m desperate for customers, and so far all I have is Regina. Will you make number two? I’ll even give it on the house this time if it means you’ll start coming back.” After starting the grinder, she entered the kitchen, preheated the oven, and pulled a pan of uncooked apple turnovers and Danishes from the refrigerator.
When she returned to Eustace and Regina, he sighed, lowering himself to a chair. He spit into the Dixie cup he held. “You know I’ll keep coming here. I just…” He looked to Regina only briefly, who sat next to him. Then cautiously, he ventured, “I have to know.”
Elizabeth swallowed hard, her eyes warning.
“Were you…out there last night? When all that was going on? ’Cause if he hurt you…”
“He didn’t hurt me,” she blurted, subconsciously pulling her sleeve low.
Regina’s eyes shot to hers. “You were out there?”
She scrunched hers. “No. I mean…”
“You were, weren’t you?” Regina rose.
“I didn’t mean to be. It was…an accident. It wasn’t what you think. And I’m all right.”
Regina’s eyes travelled slowly up and down her, taking her in. “Why?”
“Regina, look me in the eyes.” She did. “I need you to trust me. And I need you to leave it at that. Can you do that? Can you keep this between us?”
Regina looked back at Eustace and he shrugged. “I already knew,” he said.
After looking back to Elizabeth, she swallowed and nodded. “All…all right, then.”
Elizabeth’s eyes flitted back and forth between them, attempting to penetrate. “I also need you to believe me when I say something awful has been out there. The beast isn’t who we need to worry about. That other noise you heard, she’s the real threat. I…don’t think she’ll be coming back anymore, but I need you to know. I need you to know it’s not him.”
“If you’re right,” Eustace said, and she knew he believed her, “why don’t you think it’s coming back?”
“Because…I won’t be out there anymore.”
“You seem sad about that,” Regina guessed, her usually round eyes slim.
With a blink, Elizabeth looked to her work. “I can’t say more. I’m sorry.”
Eustace sighed. Then, with resolve, he made eye contact. “All right, Beth. I
’ll leave it alone. This will stay between us. Won’t it, Regina?”
She nodded. “’Course. Your secret’s safe with us.”
A hint of pressure lifted from Elizabeth’s shoulders.
The bell on the door jingled again and two more familiar faces stepped through: Sheppy and Bill Thurman. “We’ve come to say sorry,” Bill said, removing his hat and wringing his hands around it.
“There’s nothing to apologize for. Will you boys be having your usuals?” Bill liked his mochas with extra cocoa and Sheppy’s only preference was lots of foam in his espresso.
“I will,” Sheppy said with a giant smile on his face. It made her realize that even when no one had been on her side before, Sheppy hadn’t really been on a side at all, just gone with the flow of the crowd. Probably he would have always smiled that smile at her. She would always have a friend in Sheppy, because his innocence made it possible. It made it impossible for her not to like him.
“Extra foam, right, Sheppy?” she asked with a smile just as wide.
***
The sun had just risen, leaving the almost-summer air cool and damp. Henry stood on Elizabeth’s back porch, letting his recently scorched skin absorb the drizzle in the air as he wore nothing but the pants he’d left out the night before. The morning rain had a way of calming his transformation, of putting out the fire. It’d been less than twenty-four hours since he’d woken from his poison-induced coma, and his muscles still held a trace of fatigue; but for the most part he had healed, his stitches removed the night before. He’d taken them out himself, when the irritating itch told him it was time.
During the night, he hadn’t gained the courage to approach Elizabeth’s house, and it wouldn’t have mattered anyway because every drape appeared to be pulled tight. Was she staying away because she thought it was what he wanted, or had she simply realized he was right—that he was a monster?
He couldn’t blame her for thinking it was what he wanted, though, since he hadn’t given her a reason to think otherwise.
Either way, he had no right to be here. But right or not, he couldn’t help himself. After he’d made her leave his mansion the morning before, he hadn’t planned on seeing her again. Finally, it seemed he’d won—that he’d been able to push her away successfully. It wasn’t long after Arne’s lecture, however, that things began to sink in. She knew everything, but was that really so bad? She had already accepted it, weeks ago, back when he’d been consumed with worry that she would find out.
He’d come to terms with the reality that a life without her wasn’t what he wanted at all, no matter how much safer it made her or how much he didn’t deserve her. He’d never experienced internal pain at such levels, or such depleting loneliness, even after years of wandering alone. And just maybe, the need she claimed she had for him compared to the one he harbored for her.
Put simply, his life had been altered drastically since she’d been in it, and there was no going back. The longer he tried forcing his skin to be thick and his heart indifferent, the more he realized he needed her. The more he realized he’d never been more wrong in his life.
And the more brutally he hit rock bottom.
His fist was against her door before he could stop it, knocking quietly. He deserved to die for everything, deserved to live every day of his life without the sight of her face, but the ache in his heart trumped his self-hatred; just one more chance was all he needed.
After no answer, he rested his forehead on the doorframe. He almost knocked again but lowered his hand, along with his shoulders. It wasn’t until he turned away that the door unlocked, and when he turned back, a thousand minutes passed within a matter of a second. Her hair wetted the shoulders of her white robe, and the rest of her was damp too, the silky material clinging to her curves and accentuating the details that left his abdomen heavy with heat.
“Henry,” she said, “are you all right?” Her vision shifted to his waist, to his nearly healed wound, then back to his eyes, and he realized what she saw. His eyes were afire, her image swimming in his tears. He didn’t know how long they’d been there, perhaps just since seeing her.
With an inhalation both painful and as refreshing as the sight of her, he stepped in and ran his hands into her damp hair, cradling her face. She smelled of soap and clean air, and her warm skin revived the life only she could give him. He lacked the drive to remove the desperation from his voice when he managed, “I don’t want to be alone anymore, Elizabeth.” He’d said it to her before, in his other form. He wanted to say more, wanted to apologize over and over again, but couldn’t gather words.
Her brows pulled together. “You don’t have to be,” she whispered. And whether that was an invitation or not, he kissed her, because he simply couldn’t deny her love anymore; he accepted it, longed for it. His mouth held more desperation than his voice had, or even his shaky hands—more desperation than he’d ever felt.
She broke away from his lips, leaving his mouth wanting and his breath excited, and closed the door. Leaning against it, she stared up at him, her eyes saying everything. When he brought his forehead to hers, she caressed her hands slowly up his chest, and he closed his eyes at the feel of being touched by her. He heard the lightness of her breath, and when she moved her fingers delicately over his tattoo he opened his eyes, where a love he couldn’t fathom filled her own. At the same time he met her lips, she ran her hands into his hair, taking hold as though it could save her life.
Before he knew it, his hands were moving up her smooth thighs, beneath the robe that insisted on clinging to her moist skin, and when he reached her naked hips his breath caught, making him grasp her so tightly he worried he might hurt her. But she exhaled a sound of pleasure instead, and he lifted her onto him, her legs attaching as though they belonged there. He sat her on the edge of the tiled kitchen counter, a dish clattering to the floor, and continued to kiss her, his every muscle tense with want as his hands traveled over her flesh. With a rough exhalation, he moved his mouth to her neck, his hands now untying the belt of her robe. His entire body trembled, leaving a physical pain where he yearned for her most desperately.
He trailed his lips down her skin, his breath adding moisture to it, and tasted her collarbone and shoulder, too, the taste of water and silk. Without the security of the robe’s belt and with the urging of his mouth, one side slid down and unveiled her breast, exposing what her robe had failed to hide: ample, goddess-like femininity, center expressive. He groaned, his heart thudding, and slid his hands inside her robe, wrapping his arms around the small of her back and pushing her against him. She tightened her legs around his waist and her fingers in his hair. “Henry,” she sighed.
Kissing his way up her neck, he too sighed, at the way his name in her voice was almost enough to make him a whole man. With his lips against her neck, he tried not to sound too controlling when he pled, “Say it again.”
His command seemed to weaken her, and with a breathy, elevated tone that could be heard only in a moment like this, she repeated his name.
Amid another groan he met her mouth, and with their tongues in an intimate embrace, the heavy intensity in his groin lent a frenzied aggressiveness to his limbs—one that would seem more appropriate for his other self. And that self was the last person he wanted to be with her. He pulled away from her mouth, unable to find words as his chest heaved. He forced his eyes to remain on hers, rather than wander below to the supple curve of her breast.
But in that moment, no humiliation or disappointment waited in her eyes, and she seemed to understand. She even seemed to share his hunger. Gently, she traced his lips with her thumb, telling him with her eyes, as she’d done so many times, that she trusted him. And with his own eyes, he told her the same.
Without words, and with a slightly faltering breath, she freed her arms from her sleeves and let her robe fall on the countertop. He tried to compose himself at the disclosure of smooth, bare lines, but then she moved her hands to his pants. She popped the button, pulled down
the zipper. While one hand returned to his hair, the other lingered below, and the way she took hold of him made it impossible to get out her name on one breath. Her own breath was shallow, elevated with what he could only hope was excitement, and with the connection of her eyes, she pled for him to continue. With the assertive way she grasped his hair, she didn’t give him a choice.
He let his every reserve go as he kissed her, let it seep through his feverish skin and dissipate into the air, and when he brought his hand to her breast, she murmured a sound so sensual he could taste the delicious ecstasy. And he thanked God that he was the man lucky enough to hear it.
Arching her back, she pressed herself firmly against his hand, and her own hands became more aggressive. He pulled her from the countertop and secured her around him, her chest against his a euphoric sensation. With his thoughts on her red bed sheets, he rushed toward her bedroom, her hips already moving against him and her kisses filled with aroused sighs.
Control began slipping from him as he slammed her against her bedroom door, but that aggression seemed to fuel her, for she slid her feet into his pants, pushing them to the floor. She reached behind her as they kissed, opening her door, and he had barely stepped out of his pants before the edge of her bed hit his shins.
He threw her upon it with a growl that sounded too much like his darker side, and was over her at once, pinning her hands roughly to the sheets. She appeared frightened, or perhaps nervous, for the briefest second, but he entered her before his mind could get a hold on it. She inhaled sharply, a noise akin to a cry of pain, and his own breath left him abruptly, his voice a gravelly sound as he murmured her name. He wondered if he should stop, but she felt better than he had expected. It surrounded him, the physical presence of her being, and though he would stop in an instant if she desired, taking away such contact would be a bitter death.
Then her body relaxed, moving with him, and when she intertwined her fingers with his, all was right. The more in sync they became, the less he could align his thoughts.
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