by Jana Downs
The human snorted. “Yeah? Tell that to your family. Tell the house servants that I am full of shit and that they can run this place better. Even if I allowed it, the authorities wouldn’t. It would take one misspoken word for every one of you to be sold off and my estate and all my holdings seized for violating the shifter acts. The government would have to fundamentally change for such a thing to take place.”
“You could make us a sanctuary, Flavius. You have the power and influence. Or you will when we win the Olympics,” Tobias said, his thoughts drifting down the same dangerous path his mate’s had the night before. It was crazy, but it could be done.
“You have that much faith in our Ludus?” Flavius asked, amusement creeping into his tone.
“I do.”
Flavius chuckled softly. “You have always been a dreamer, Tobias. How are my terms for you? Acceptable?”
“I’d also like to be able to walk with my mate outside. The gladiators are pretty strictly monitored, as you know. Other than to the pit and back, they get little freedom to move about. If you let us walk the side yard, the living space is acceptable,” Tobias said, forcing his mind back on topic.
Flavius nodded. “I think that can be done. You’ll have to allow an armed guard to follow you around, and if you two try anything that would compromise the safety of the estate, they will be authorized to use force.” Tobias looked at him strangely. He’d never known Flavius to fear his servants. The way he said it smacked of fear.
“Why?” he asked. He hadn’t asked “Why” his whole life. Now he wanted to know the thoughts behind the decisions that governed his life. Cassisus, you’ve gotten me thinking like you.
The human sat back in his chair and looked Tobias in the eyes as he spoke. “Because your dreams are dangerous things. Dreamers are always the most dangerous people in society because they imagine a world can be made better by the intentions of ordinary men. I don’t have your faith, and I fear that your desire for freedom will lead to bloodshed and heartbreak that I would avoid at all costs. We have a happy life here, Tobias. I treat you and the rest of the shifters right. There is no reason to change what we are.”
Tobias raised his eyebrows. “Does Corbin feel like there isn’t a reason to change the way things are?”
Flavius’s cheeks colored, and the acrid scent of unease filled the air. “The lanista is an idealist like you, Tobias. Be careful you don’t fall into his fantasies. It is best not to dwell on dreams.”
Tobias disagreed, but he didn’t say so. He’d probably pushed his luck enough today. Instead, he opened his laptop and scrolled back to his budget and got back to work. He shouldn’t have mentioned Flavius’s relationship to Corbin, and he was just speculating. There was no reason to incite the master’s wrath over the subject.
Cassisus’s words came back to him then. If he has secrets, he has weaknesses. A quick glance up revealed Flavius buried once again in his paperwork with a sour expression on his face. He’s as miserable as we are. It was clear to Tobias in that moment. The master was just as trapped by this situation as they were. It was something to think about at a later date.
“Master, may I dine with you before I go to my mate?” he asked.
Flavius nodded, not looking up. “Absolutely. I’ll have the kitchen staff bring enough for two. Do you want me to speak with the staff about your treatment?”
“No. That’s all right. I have a meeting with the elders where I can dispute the exile. If they cannot accept my mating, then I will figure out something else. I just have to change their minds somehow.” Tobias didn’t know how he was going to, but he had to do it. He may not have been in love with Cassisus just yet. But, he was definitely interested in something long term with him. They were mates, and while mating didn’t necessarily guarantee a love match, now that Tobias had made up his mind to be with Cass, he was going to do everything in his power to make sure they were happy. That included being together. He wasn’t a fan of the looking-but-not-touching thing that the mice wanted him to do. He had mated a cat, and by God, he was going to be with him.
* * * *
It was later than expected when Tobias managed to leave Flavius in his study still working on the last-minute preparations for New Orleans. His muscles were cramped from sitting at his desk too long, and he was sleepy from his large meal with Flavius. The man had asked for enough food to feed an army. And Tobias was grateful for his sharing. The kitchen staff may not have liked it, but they didn’t have much of a choice.
He crossed the courtyard between the house and the Ludus, looking forward to some time with Cass. He knew it was selfish to ask after Cass’s hard day of workouts, but he could really use a back rub to get the knots out of his shoulders. The guards nodded to him as he passed their post at the entrance. Flavius had basically given him carte blanche when it came to the Ludus. Now if only I can get him to do the same for the rest of the people under his care. He imagined his people would have significantly less to say if they were allowed the same privileges Tobias got. He didn’t think the problem was necessarily the freedoms themselves. It was the inequality of treatment between Tobias and the rest of them. He understood it even if he didn’t like it.
The corridor where the gladiators slept was already dimmed for the night, and Tobias was pretty sure he’d missed the snack time. He hoped Cass wasn’t too annoyed over the fact because if one more person yelled at him today, Tobias was going to lose it.
“Hi, Cass,” he greeted as he came to the front of his mate’s cell and began to strip off his clothes so he could shift and get through the locked bars. “Sorry I’m late. I had a hell of a day. I hope you are in a listening mood because I need to vent like nobody’s business.” No answer accompanied his statement. He frowned. “Cass?”
He quickly stripped the rest of his clothes and placed them close enough that Tobias could collect them through the bars afterward. With a thought, he brought the animal to the forefront of his mind. The entity rubbed against his mind in greeting, anxious over being kept suppressed so long. I get it. You get put in a box all day, too, huh? The integral part of himself nodded its agreement in his mind before it blended with Tobias. He inhaled slowly as his scent changed from man to animal and his body flashed from human to mouse. He sat outside the bars and smoothed two paws over his whiskers before ducking between the two iron bars and into Cass’s cell.
The gladiator had already put up the privacy partition, so he had to dart around it in order to get into the main part of the cell. It was dim, and his eyesight wasn’t fantastic in the soft golden glow of the side lamp. However, Cass was easily visible lounging on his bed, staring at the small TV as it flashed colors from whatever show he was watching.
Tobias shifted back. “Hey, why didn’t you answer me?” he asked. Still the tiger ignored him. His frown deepened. “Cassisus?”
“What?” the gladiator asked at last.
Tobias couldn’t help the flicker of annoyance that went through him at the “fuck off” in the tone. “What is your problem?”
“Nothing.”
“Right,” Tobias drawled. “You’re acting perfectly normal. You always sound like someone pissed in your cornflakes. Did you get your ass kicked at practice or something?”
Cass snorted. “Hardly. I just found out some news today that I wanted to discuss with you.” He raised the remote and clicked off the TV. “You want to explain to me why you failed to mention the fact that you had to be bribed with a goddamn cottage in order to come to me?”
Tobias looked at him. “Uh, I was going to after I made sure it was all right with Flavius that I brought you along. It’s not a big deal, Cass. You knew I wasn’t exactly happy to be mated to you in the beginning, but I promised last night that I was in now.” Still guilt ate at him. He should’ve told him from the beginning. “I am sorry, though. I should’ve told you sooner.” He hoped that it would soothe a little of the cat’s pride and express the fact that Tobias may have started out feeling that way but he didn’t an
ymore.
Cass didn’t say anything for about twenty seconds. Then without warning he chucked the remote in his hand at the wall. It shattered on impact. Tobias jumped. Fuck.
“Yeah? You don’t get anything out of being with me, huh? How long were you going to use me to get your way with Flavius? Did you expect me to just shrug and say, ‘Well, gee, thanks for bringing me along with you, Tobias’? Do you think I’m stupid or something?”
Tobias shook his head. “No, Cass. It’s not like that. I was fully prepared to stay with you here in the cell after last night—”
“Well, if fucking was all you needed to feel like you could commit, I should’ve tried that sooner instead of, you know, being a nice gentleman and all that. You just needed a little animal incentive right?” The gladiator rolled to his feet and took two menacing steps in Tobias’s direction. Instinctual fear had Tobias shrinking back away from his mate. He was a predator, and Tobias wasn’t. There was nothing he could do to suppress the utter terror wrought by a predatory being coming at him like he was about to hit him.
Cass’s eyes widened. “You think I’m going to hit you?”
“Well you certainly don’t look like you’re going to cuddle me,” Tobias snapped, angry that he’d been afraid to begin with. “I should’ve told you. I get it. But you are way overreacting.”
“I just wanted someone to want me for me. Forgive me for being a little disappointed that you were getting something out of the deal. What do I get, Tobias?” Cassisus rumbled. He looked really tired, like he was fighting the urge to say “Fuck it” and failing miserably at it.
“You get me,” Tobias said.
Cassisus snorted. “Right. I get you with certain terms and conditions.”
Tobias shook his head. “No terms. No conditions. Just me, Cass.” The weariness he’d been fighting all day replaced the anger almost as quickly as it had flared up. He looked up into his mate’s blue eyes and begged him to understand, to give him a break, just this once. “I am giving up everything. I wanted us to have a life separate from all this,” he motioned to the cell, the Ludus, and everything that accompanied it. “That’s why I still wanted the cabin, but it doesn’t matter because Flavius isn’t going to let us live together, so I said screw it.”
“What?” Cass snapped. “What do you mean he’s not going to let us live together?” Tobias saw the fury building again, and he shook his head quickly in an effort to stop the inevitable eruption.
“I mean, he won’t let us live outside the Ludus together. He’ll give me the cottage, but he won’t let me stay there with you, so I said forget it. He’s going to let us move into a new cell that’s bigger and a little more private.” He hoped that that would be enough to comfort Cass over his keeping the absolute truth from him.
“You gave that up for me?” Cass asked, suspicion thick enough to cut in his voice.
“Of course I did,” Tobias said, closing his eyes and wrapping his arms around his middle. He was so tired of people yelling at him today about all the ways he’d fucked up. Between his family, Flavius, and Cass, he wasn’t sure how much more he could take. “I told you that I was in, Cass. I know that it doesn’t seem like much after hearing what Flavius was going to give me, but I genuinely like you and I hope to fall in love with the man that fate gave me. I want to have a life that is filled with something only free men can really have.”
Cass sighed. “It’s all about freedom to you, huh? This life is worth less than it should be because you feel trapped. I am just another cord used to tie you down.”
“No, you stupid cat,” Tobias said. There was no fire in his voice when he said it. “You are the thing that sets me free.”
He didn’t want to look up, didn’t want to see Cass’s scorn or his suspicion. He wanted to see acceptance and was afraid that he’d see rejection.
The scent of his mate surrounded him an instant before he was ensconced in Cassisus’s strong arms. “You certainly know how to charm your way back into my good graces.”
Tobias leaned into his touch. “You are an ass, and I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Cass’s arms tightened, and the cat nuzzled the curve of Tobias’s neck. “You really like me.” He sounded far too smug about the fact. “I mean, I’d get it if you got something out of it even if I didn’t like it, but you seriously like me.”
“Yeah, yeah, don’t get all Miss America about it, asshole. You like me, you really like me.” Tobias grumped, tilting his head to the side to give Cassisus better access to his erogenous zone.
Cass barked out a laugh. “I think you just achieved a new level of sarcasm, mouse.”
“I rely on sarcasm to deal with your smug face, cat,” Tobias muttered, trying very hard not to sound like he was thoroughly enjoying the attention his neck was getting. How did Cass know every sweet spot on his body?
“Hmmm, you want to talk after we have makeup sex?” Cass asked, licking Tobias’s pulse.
“Makeup sex?” Tobias managed to gasp as his body reacted to what Cass was dishing out.
“Oh, yes, baby. It’s the best part of fighting,” Cass rumbled.
“We were fighting?”
Cass nipped the place he’d licked. “What would you call it?”
He had a point. “How does this makeup sex work exactly?”
Cass’s chuckle sent a chill down Tobias’s spine. “First I worship every inch of your gorgeous body.” He demonstrated by running his hands slowly down Tobias’s sides, teasing the flesh he found there. The benefits of being naked after shifting were fabulous.
“I felt you all day,” Tobias admitted. He swallowed as Cass’s hands kneaded his buttocks. “I wanted you beside me. Every time I felt the soreness in my muscles, I wanted you.”
“I like where this is going,” Cass said, smirking. “You’re not helping that ego you’re teasing me about.” He lapped at Tobias’s pulse, instigating a wash of sensation up and down Tobias’s spine. “Let’s take this to the bed, lover mine.”
The most animal parts of Tobias were very all right with that idea. Whether he realized it or not, Cass awakened the hungers his kind were known for. As a mouse, sex and sensuality were common. Tobias had been the exception rather than the rule when it came to his desire of pleasure. That was until last night, when every hunger he’d ever had sharpened enough to slice through any sexual suppression and turned Tobias into a tight ball of want. He hadn’t been kidding when he’d said he’d wanted Cass throughout the day. Despite his crappy day, there had been many moments when the urge to lose himself in sex had crossed his mind and hardened his body in preparation for the act. He’d thanked God that the desk had hidden his reaction for the most part.
“Okay.” He let his mate lead him over to the bed and push him gently down on the narrow surface. His heart pounded as he looked up at his mate. I get to do this every night. He shuddered at the thought. He hoped that every night was as sharp and wonderful as the first one. “You’re an addiction that I could get used to craving, Cassisus.”
The cat winked. “Likewise.” He really was a handsome man, tall, broad shouldered, beautiful skin, light eyes, and lighter hair. He was a human reflection of his animal self, and that made for one incredibly alluring predator. Mine. His animal was right on target.
“Sexy boy, let me touch you. Hands above your head and don’t move them,” Cass commanded, his blue eyes heated to almost liquid mercury.
Tobias hesitated before doing as he was told. He wasn’t sure where Cassisus was going with this, but he was game. The cat growled something low and complimentary under his breath as Tobias stretched his body out to accommodate his request.
“Like this?”
“Perfect, baby. Spread your thighs for me. I want you vulnerable,” the gladiator rumbled.
Christ. Wasn’t it obvious that he was vulnerable to his mate already? It didn’t matter that his whole world was getting turned upside down when he was with Cassisus. It was too soon, but damn if he didn’t feel
like destiny had done its job and given him a man that he could be proud to call his own, all six-something, arrogant, pushy inches of him.
Cassisus ran his hands down Tobias’s chest, tweaking the nipples hard enough that Tobias arched into the touch before continuing his slow glide downward. “God yes!” Tobias gasped. He wanted his mate to hurry the process along, but he was curious as to what he was doing. Cass took his time tracing the hard lines of Tobias’s abdomen and teasing his inner thighs while completely ignoring the hard cock that wept for his attention inches from his fingertips.
“From now on you’ll be truthful to me?” Cass asked, twisting his nipples with one hand while simultaneously massaging the tight globes of Tobias’s sac.
“Forgiven so easily?” Tobias countered, determined to not be dominated during this moment of sex and forgiveness.
“Forgiven easily enough. So long as you talk to me, love me, and stay with me, Tobias. I can forgive you anything.” The words wormed their way into his chest and set up shop in the part of him Tobias felt was too soon to experience. Words like those should be illegal. His lines are getting to me.
“I will be as truthful with you as I can,” Tobias promised past the lump in his throat. He wanted to say so much more than that. He wanted to thank Cass for being his mate, for being himself, for just being at this point. After the rejection he’d suffered today, his acceptance and forgiveness meant so much more and was so much sweeter than it would’ve been otherwise.
“Good.” The rumbled agreement was the perfect response. Cass knelt beside him on the narrow mattress and started the same path he’d traced with his fingers but with his tongue this time. Tobias let his eyes slide shut as he fell into the madness of Cassisus’s touch. Yes. Yes. Please.
“Mine,” Cass murmured a second before Tobias’s nipple was engulfed in the wet, hot cavern of his mate’s mouth. “All mine.”
“Yes!” Tobias yelped as the flesh was kneaded with his mate’s tongue and the hard press of the cat’s teeth made the threat of harm ratchet up the tension that much higher. “God, more!” The nerve endings in his nipples seemed intimately tied to the one throbbing in his groin, and all he wanted was for the pleasure to get sharper, for the touches to get harder, for more of the delicious attention that Cassisus was raining down on him.