Hope Blackburn licked her lips and lowered her lashes. "Would you want to ravish me if you found me alone, Captain?"
Judah pried her hand from his arm. "I am not in the habit of ravishing silly little girls, Miss Blackburn. And why should I? If you have seen my wife, you know she is everything a man could want in a woman. She has beauty, kindness, and most of all, she knows how to conduct herself like a lady, a virtue that I prize above all others."
A flood of color stained the young girl's cheeks. "I . . . am sorry, sir," she stammered. "It is just that you are so brave and strong ... I believe you are the most wonderful man I have ever met. I did not mean any disrespect."
Judah saw the tear that slid down Hope's cheek, and he spoke to her more kindly. "I thank you for the compliment, but I have no interest in any woman other than my wife. You are a lovely young girl and do not need to flirt with an old married man."
Hope's eyes sparkled. "Do you really think I am pretty?"
"I do."
"Am I as beautiful as your wife?"
Judah smiled, and his eyes moved to Liberty, who was gazing out to sea. He knew she was unhappy because Hope Blackburn was showing him so much attention. "In my eyes, Miss Blackburn, no one is as lovely as my wife. You see, I look at her with the eyes of love, and it is hard for me to find one flaw in her."
"Does she know how fortunate she is, Captain?"
His laughter was deep. "I certainly hope I can convince her of that, Miss Blackburn. Now run along and do not again come up here without an escort."
The young girl nodded her head, and moved slowly down the steps. She just knew she would die from unrequited love for this strong man who had given his heart to his unworthy wife.
Liberty was seething on the inside. Judah had not once come near her since they had left Martinique, yet he seemed to encourage Hope Blackburn's attentions. In the last few months she'd had nothing but trouble with men. First there was Judah, then Sebastian and Abdul. For her part, all men could just go to the devil. In her mood she wanted no part of any of them.
"You must not mind my sister, Liberty," Charity Blackburn said softly. "Mama says she is too pretty for her own good. I wish I could be pretty like her."
Liberty looked down at the little face with the soft gray eyes, at the unruly brown hair; and she felt an ache in her heart. This girl reminded her so much of herself when she was growing up that she wanted to comfort her. "I know you will not believe this, Charity, but you will one day be prettier than your sister."
Liberty saw Mrs. Blackburn approaching, but Charity had not. Liberty knew if she never did another useful thing in her life, she would save this girl from the heartache she had lived through as a child.
The young girl shook her head sadly. "Mama says I will never be pretty and I suspect she is right."
Liberty drew in a deep breath. Taking Charity's hand in hers, she knelt down beside her. "Listen to me—hear and remember. I know what you are feeling. Once I, too, stood in the shadow of a beautiful sister. You will one day grow up, and I hope you will forget the hurt you have felt because of your mother and sister."
The young girl's eyes rounded in wonder. "You could never have been anything but beautiful."
Liberty stared right at Mrs. Blackburn, knowing Charity did not realize that her mother was standing right behind her. "I can assure you I was very homely as a child, a fact that my mother and sister never failed to point out to me. I cannot understand anyone who dwells on something so artificial as facial beauty, while overlooking the inner beauty of a child. Such people do not realize the hurt they are inflicting, hurt that will last a lifetime."
"I do not blame my mother, Liberty. She cannot help it if she loves my sister better. How can she love someone as ugly as I am?"
Liberty watched Charity's mother go down on her knees, and gather her daughter into her arms. With tears in her eyes, Faith Blackburn spoke. "My dearest child, how could I have been so heartless. I did not realize what I was doing to you until just now." Her tear-bright eyes met Liberty's. "How can I make it up to her?"
"I believe you have already started to do that," Liberty said, moving away to leave mother and daughter alone. She wondered how different her life would have been if someone had made her mother understand the harm she had done her two daughters. For the first time, Liberty realized that Bandera had been the one most harmed by their mother's attitude. Perhaps it was too late for her, but she hoped the Blackburn sisters had a wiser mother.
It was a quiet night, and the Winged Victory sailed smoothly over the waves. Faith Blackburn was brushing Charity's hair, while Hope flipped through one of Judah's books. Liberty watched the mother lovingly kiss her younger daughter's forehead. The older woman caught Liberty's eye, and mouthed the words, "Thank you."
When a rap came at the door, Liberty opened it to find Philippe smiling at her. "Good evening, ladies," he said politely, removing his cap and tucking it under his arm. "I have come to steal your hostess away from you. Her husband wants to see her."
Liberty gathered up her shawl, and placed it around her shoulders. As Philippe held the door for her, she swept past him, anger flaming in her eyes. When they were out of earshot of the cabin, Liberty turned to the first mate. "How dare Judah send for me, summon me before him like a lowly servant. Would it ever have occurred to him to come for me himself?"
Philippe chuckled. "He would have come himself, but to tell the truth, he's a bit put off by the older Blackburn daughter. She is always pestering him, and he wants to avoid her."
As they ascended the companionway, Liberty felt the cool night breeze on her face. There was no moon, so it was very dark. "You will find the captain waiting for you at the helm, Madame. I will bid you a good night." With those words Philippe moved into the shadows and disappeared down the companionway.
Liberty slowly made her way up to the quarterdeck. It was always reserved for the captain and first mate, and the common sailor was not welcome there unless invited. Furious, Liberty wondered if Judah had invited Hope Blackburn onto the quarterdeck. The girl had certainly been there often enough.
"Thank you for coming, Liberty," he said, as she stopped beside him. "I would not have blamed you if you had declined my invitation."
It was too dark to see his face clearly; he was no more than a vague shadow. "I could hardly do that, Judah. Whatever my faults, I would never embarrass you in front of others by refusing."
"Yes, I counted on the fact that your manners are always impeccable."
Liberty was so near Judah that she could feel the heat from his body. For one crazy moment she wanted to melt against him, to have him hold her in his arms. "What did you wish to see me about?" she asked, stepping back to put some distance between them.
Judah could smell the fresh clean fragrance that she always wore. His head was reeling from her nearness, and he felt desire flame to life inside him. He tried to ignore the ache that cried out to be eased by her.
"I wanted to tell you that we should be arriving at New ^Orleans tomorrow. I believe we should talk about a few things, Liberty."
"I have nothing to say to you, Judah. I am going home to Briar Oaks as soon as I can."
He was quiet for a moment. "I cannot allow you to do that, Liberty. When you face Sebastian, I will be beside you. I don't need to warn you he is dangerous."
"I am not afraid of Sebastian. Briar Oaks is my home, and I do not need you to help me defend it."
"Oh, really?" he said in a biting tone. "I suppose you didn't need my help when you were held captive by the English at Briar Oaks? And how well did you handle Sebastian in Martinique without my help?"
"Is that all you have to talk about, Judah? I am really very tired and I planned to go to bed early."
"Liberty," he said, reaching out and taking her trembling hand in his. "We have a great deal to talk about. I just don't know where to start."
"I do not want to hear anything you have to say, Judah. We should never have been married. We are all wrong
for one another." Her words were like a dagger in her own heart. She squeezed her eyes tightly together, glad that it was too dark for Judah to see her tears.
"Liberty, there are many things that have been wrong between us and I don't know how to explain them away."
"Do you not know how to explain why your mistress Adriane Pierce, ordered me out of your house? Can you not explain why Charity Blackburn is always hanging onto you, Judah?"
He began to massage her hand, and slowly he pulled her closer to him. "Dare I hope that you are jealous?"
"I believe humiliated is a more accurate description. If these past weeks are any indication of what life with you is going to be like, I can well do without it. I will never again stand by and play second fiddle to someone, Judah. My girlhood was spent in the shadow of my sister, and I did not feel good about myself. I can promise you, no one will ever again make me feel unloved. I ... do not want to be your wife."
"Liberty, I hope you don't mean that."
"I do mean it."
"I suppose you think you would have been better off if you had married one of your Creole gentlemen?" he bit out.
"Perhaps."
"I am well aware that you are exceedingly lovely and had many admirers. If you are trying to make me jealous, you have succeeded."
"No, Judah, that was not my intention. I do not play games. You have me mixed up with my sister."
He dropped her hand. "If you no longer want to be my wife, that is my misfortune, Liberty. In trying to do the right thing by you, it seems I did everything wrong. What do you want of me? Tell me so I might know," he said softly. "What do you want me to be?"
"I have never asked anything of you, Judah. I married you, knowing you did not love me. Perhaps if you had been able to marry the woman you loved, you would now be happy. I just don't know anymore."
Judah stared at her in wonderment. How could she be so mistaken? How could she not know that he loved her beyond all reason. He couldn't lose her. He had to make her love him. "Liberty, we have so much to talk about, but now is not the time. When we anchor I have to make sure the Blackburns are put on a ship for Philadelphia, and I want you to go to Bend of the River. As soon as I am able, I will come to you. Give me a chance to explain my feelings before you decide anything."
A chill wind ruffled Liberty's hair, and she pulled her shawl tightly about her shoulders. "You will know where to find me if you want to talk, Judah. You have always known where to find me."
The muscles in his body tensed as she turned and walked away. Judah wanted to go after her and declare his love, but instead he listened to her footsteps fade into silence. He raised his head to the dark sky, knowing that if he couldn't have Liberty, nothing had any meaning for him. She was his heart—she was his life. The night's biting chill now reached the very depth of his being. The sun would not shine so brightly, nor would the birds singly so sweetly when he was without Liberty's smile.
Judah cursed himself for a fool. If he wasn't careful he would become just like all the weak-minded men he had always despised, and forever be writing poetry to his ladylove.
When the Winged Victory anchored in New Orleans, Liberty had said good-bye to the Blackburns with little regret. Judah was nowhere to be seen when she boarded the longboat with Philippe and four other crewmembers. As it moved swiftly through the current of the Mississippi, Liberty felt as if she had been away for a lifetime. It would be hard to pick up where she had left off.
As the longboat moved past Chalmette where the battle had taken place between the Americans and the British, she saw the scars on the land. Trees had been splintered and the earth had deep gaping holes. Perhaps Chalmette should stand as a monument to remind man of how destructive his battles were.
Philippe pointed to the battlefield. "We have just about come full circle, Madame. One wonders if we have gained any knowledge from all this. I wonder, was it worth it?"
"Some will say it was, Philippe. Perhaps this war had to be fought to make way for peace. I pray it is the last battle that will ever be fought on American soil."
"So do I."
"Will you . . . will Judah be going back to sea?"
Philippe stared at her for a moment. "Didn't he tell you?"
"No, we have hardly had a chance to talk."
Philippe lowered his voice so only Liberty could hear him. "When you see him again the two of you can work out your problems."
Liberty smiled. Philippe had become so dear to her; she would miss him when he left. "I know a ship captain's life is at sea. I would not be at all surprised if Judah decided to take the Blackburns to Philadelphia himself."
"Look, there is Bend of the River just ahead," Philippe observed, glad to end the conversation. He wondered why Judah had not told Liberty his plans.
When the boat was secured to the pier, Philippe helped Liberty ashore. Already the buggy was making its way toward the pier to take her to the big house. "The captain sent a man early this morning to tell his mother to expect you. I have no doubt they have been watching the river for you all morning." He tipped his hat. "I'd best be getting back, Madame. The captain told me not to linger."
She reached out her hand. "Will I see you again, Philippe?"
He took her small hand in his. "Not for a long time, Madame. I will be sailing within the week."
"I will miss you, my dear, dear friend," she said, fighting tears.
"There is not a one of us that will not miss your sweet smile, Madame," Philippe declared in a gruff voice that was threaded with emotion. When he released her hand, he quickly hopped into the boat, and Liberty waved to him and the other crewmembers. She couldn't bring herself to leave until they disappeared around the bend. Some of her happiest moments had been spent aboard the Winged Victory.
As the buggy drew to a halt beside Liberty, a smiling Biff leaped down and loaded her trunks into the back seat. After he had helped her into the buggy, she arranged her skirt and then glanced at the big house. "Take the side road, Biff, I will not be stopping off at Bend of the River—I am going home."
"But, Madame, I was told to bring you to the house."
"When you get back, you can explain to Monsieur Gustave that I had something important to do—something that would not wait."
"Yes, Madame" Biff said obediently.
Bandera was lounging near the fire when Oralee burst into the sitting room. "It's Liberty. She's come home!" the excited woman declared.
"Liberty is dead, Oralee," Bandera said dully. "I do not appreciate your jest—it is in the poorest taste."
"It is the truth. I didn't believe it either, but I saw her with my own eyes."
Bandera slowly stood up, not daring to believe that her little sister still lived. She had found, to her surprise, that she had grieved for weeks when Sebastian had told her that Liberty had drowned at sea. Now she was afraid to believe that Liberty was alive, lest it be a mistake. "Show me my sister, Oralee. When I see her face, then I will know she is alive."
As Liberty got out of the buggy and slowly walked up the steps, a heavy loneliness descended on her, and she couldn't shake it—not even when Oralee came bursting out of the door and grabbed her in a tight hug. "We was told you were dead, ma chere," she cried, forgetting to be formal. "Praise the good Lord, you are alive!"
Liberty looked past Oralee to the ghost-white face of her sister. "Oui, I am alive." She moved past Oralee and stood before Bandera. "What? No regrets at seeing that I still live, dearest sister?"
Bandera stood as if turned to stone, but for the single tear that rolled down her cheek. "I cannot believe it. I had thought myself alone in the world, with no one to care for me. Now you are home, and you will make everything all right."
Liberty stared in disbelief at her sister. "You change your loyalties so quickly, I can never keep up with you. I suppose I should be grateful that the British have vacated my house so you and Sebastian will not have me locked in my room."
"It was wrong of me to side with Sebastian against my own s
ister, Liberty. I know that now. I wish there were some way I could make it up to you. Perhaps your coming home will give me a chance to make amends for the way I treated you in the past."
Liberty had never before seen her sister in this mood. But she had often been fooled into believing Bandera had changed, only to find that was not the case, so she was not taken in by this newly found sisterly love. "Where are your husband and Alicia, Bandera? I have a few things to say to all three of you. If I have you all together, that will save me the trouble of repeating myself."
"I suppose you haven't heard. Alicia was drowned in the river three days ago. It was the strangest thing. She never went near the river, because she was deathly afraid of it. Yet, Sebastian found her floating face down under the pier. He swears it was that old witch, Zippora, who was responsible."
"If Alicia is dead, it is not Zippora's fault. If anyone was a witch, it was Sebastian's mother."
Bandera shook her head. "You have become hard, Liberty. There was a time when you had charity in your heart for everyone, hut that no longer seems to be the case."
"I had to become strong to survive, Bandera. Your husband has tried to rid the world of me, but he has failed. Now that I am home, I will expect you and Sebastian to vacate the house."
"I don't blame you. Neither Sebastian nor I deserve any charity from you. I am sorry to tell you that he has stripped the house of everything but the barest necessities. He has even sold all the slaves. Nothing remains but Oralee and a half-empty house."
"No, he could not have sold all the slaves," Liberty said with a catch in her voice. "I made a promise to Delton that he and his family would never be sold or separated. Surely Sebastian would not take it upon himself to sell what belongs to me."
"It was awful," Bandera said, placing a shaky hand to her brow. "Delton was crying and begging Sebastian not to break up his family, saying you promised never to separate them."
Liberty had never known such fury. "I'll tell you what you can do, Bandera, if you are really as penitent as you claim. Find out who purchased Delton and his family and then tell Sebastian he has until tomorrow morning to get them back or I will have the authorities throw him in jail. I will, Bandera, I swear it."
Moontide Embrace (Historical Romance) Page 41