by Sybil Smith
She repositions her body so that she can open herself, spread herself even more to take all that Vera is so perfectly giving. Her fingers roam across Vera's spine, trying to find purchase on the firm skin as Vera nearly withdraws all the way out before thrusting deeply back inside of her again.
"Is this," Vera rasps, briefly pulling her lips from the soft spot right under Evelyn's ear, "Is this okay?"
"Yes," Evelyn chants, digging her fingers in to tug Vera towards her faster, harder. "Yes, yes, yes."
She releases her grip on Vera's back to instead pull Vera closer, her teeth biting at Vera's lower lip and then taking every bit of space in Vera's mouth as her own. Sharing each breath, seemingly sharing everything the other has to offer. It feels incredible to be wanted so viscerally and wholly by someone like Vera.
To be wanted like no one has ever wanted her before.
Vera's forearm strains with the effort of keeping the quick, intense pace their bodies have set of their own accord. With their hips rolling in tandem, Vera's fingers digging into her shoulder, their bodies sticking together in the best of ways, staccato gasps and breathy moans coming from one or maybe both of them, it feels like Vera is above her and all around her, inside her both physically and emotionally. She is filled with Vera, her love for Vera; filled to the brim with nothing but Vera as Vera brings her to the edge, as she comes apart in a blissful, quivering fury in Vera's arms.
"Wow," Vera finally utters after long moments, her forehead dropping to rest on Evelyn's shoulder.
"Yes," Evelyn nods, her eyes still closed and limbs heavy. "Wow."
Vera rolls until she's lying on her side facing Evelyn. Her fingers skim down the soft skin of Evelyn's collarbone, her chest, to rest on the soft skin of her stomach. "I think I'm going to like living with you."
Evelyn's eyes crack open, the corners of her lips barely tilting up. "I'm glad to know this is what it took to convince you."
Vera laughs, and the sound is something Evelyn knows she'll always look forward to hearing. She, too, rolls to her side, facing Vera, and her hand drifts down the firm muscles of her lover's torso. Vera starts to shift on her back, but Evelyn gently stops her. "Let me watch you. Please?"
Instead of verbally responding, Vera bends one leg, opening herself for Evelyn's skillful fingers to have more room to work her body like they are so capable of doing; to give herself to Evelyn completely and wholly—just as Evelyn's given herself to Vera.
"I love you," Vera whispers, her lips ghosting the shell Evelyn's ear and smiling widely when she hears the same reply, with just the same amount of conviction, spill from Evelyn's lips.
* * *
"Two weeks," is the first thing Vera hears as she steps into their home after work several days later. Evelyn is flitting around the room in a fiery blur with all sorts of cleaning supplies encased in her arms. Vera chances a step forward with a slightly furrowed brow.
"Uh..what?"
"Two weeks," Evelyn repeats in clear distress, looking up only briefly from cleaning the coffee table for the fourth time. "She's coming in two weeks."
"Babe…slow down," Vera says as Evelyn angry scrubs at a nonexistent fleck of dust. "I don't know what you're talking about."
Evelyn stops everything, stands ram-rod straight, and huffs in exasperation. "The social worker, Vera. She called an hour ago to set up our preliminary meeting."
"Oh," Vera nods. But then her eyes grow wide. "Oh, shit. The social worker? What do I need to do? Do you want me to help clean? I can do windows or-"
"No." Evelyn offhandedly points towards the couch and begins to clean again. "Just sit down and don't move."
Vera slowly lowers herself down to the couch, careful to not move any of the throw pillows even a fraction of the inch. "For two weeks?"
"Of course not," Evelyn replies in clear frustration. "Simply sit there for a little while and let me deal with this stress the best way I know how."
"Okay," Vera nods, clear concern on her face. "Whatever you need."
"What I need," she begins, her voice colored with distress, "is to be assured that everything will be okay. But since it's impossible to know that ahead of time, I'm going to clean until I feel more prepared."
Vera fiddles with her fingers, obviously at a loss at how to help. "Do you want me to make you dinner? Cook something?"
"No!" Evelyn almost shouts as she looks up. Her face instantly shows regret at the outburst. "Sorry. But the last time you made dinner, it took almost an hour to scrub the pasta sauce from the tile grout."
Vera starts to refute that it had been that bad, but that night is etched pretty clearly in her mind. No sense in trying to deny it. "Right. Do you want me to call delivery instead?"
"I'm not hungry."
"Evelyn…"
"I'm not," Evelyn explains. "When you're nervous, Corticotrophin-Releasing Factor controls the release of major glucocorticoid cortisol which stimulates the sympathetic nervous system, and thus increases alertness and suppresses appetite."
"Oh, the corto..gropho…menino. Of course," Vera slowly nods in faux comprehension. "Can I at least order food for me then?"
"If you promise not to make a mess."
"I'm not a kid, Evelyn. I do know how to eat like a civilized human being," Vera pouts. She crosses her arms across her chest. "Maybe I'll just go to Ma's."
"Okay," she flippantly replies, not looking up from her task at hand. "Take her casserole dish with you when you go."
"Really?" Vera mumbles at the dismissive treatment. Standing, she clasps Evelyn's arm and pulls her to the couch. "Sit."
Evelyn tries to walk off, but Vera blocks any progressive movement. "Vera, I really don't have time for this."
"You have two weeks," Vera reasons, gently easing Evelyn down to the cushions. "You can take a couple of hours to relax and get your mind off of things."
A low sigh of submission is emitted from her lips. "Fine. But only for a few hours."
"That's all I'm asking for."
She watches in curiosity as Vera digs through her work pants for a horribly wrinkled piece of paper and cell phone. "What are you doing?"
"We are going to order food, and you're going to try to eat because I know you skipped lunch today," Vera explains, trying to smooth out the little card to read the phone number of their favorite take out. "Then we are going to sit here and watch tv until you don't even remember your name."
Evelyn's eyebrows quirk skeptically. "That will be quite the feat if you manage to pull that off."
Vera shrugs in faux bravado. "Yeah, well I've been known to do some pretty astounding stuff."
Smiling, and barely holding back a playful eye roll, she curls herself into Vera's side—a place that, on more than one occasion, they've both realized she fits perfectly. "What are we watching?"
Vera fumbles with the remote, cursing a quiet expletive when she nearly drops it for the second time. "Mythbusters."
"Well that is pretty astounding," she mutters.
"What is?"
"Getting you to willingly watch this," Evelyn retorts, smiling as she remembers all the complaints Vera usually has about this particular show.
Vera laughs, her shoulder bumping Evelyn's. "Shut up."
Smile going sultry, Evelyn raises a brow. "Or what?"
"Or else I'll make you watch an Andy Griffith marathon again," Vera threatens.
A horrified look crosses Evelyn's face. "You wouldn't."
After the food was delivered and Evelyn had eaten more than she suspected she would, she curls up against Vera's chest to absentmindedly watch the television. Vera's long fingers stroking the hair at the nape of her neck nearly puts her to sleep, and after a while she has to stifle a succession of yawns.
"Feel better?"
"Much." She sleepily looks up and places her hand on Vera's chest. "Thank you for this, Vera."
"I didn't really do anything," Vera deprecates with a shrug.
"But it was exactly what I needed." She stretches her b
ody full length to give a quick, sweet kisses to Vera's lips. "I'm so grateful to have you in my life. No one has ever made me feel like you do, and certainly no one has known me as well. Sometimes I wonder if you know me better than I know myself."
"I don't know about that," Vera deflects with a slight grin. "You've got a lot going on in that big brain of yours."
"True," Evelyn agrees, resting her head back against Vera's chest. "But you're on the right track."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
"It was intended to be." She smiles as Vera kisses the crown of her head, and it pleasantly lingers against her scalp. "I love you."
"Love you too." The loud ending credits emitted from the tv pull them from their sentiment. "That was what, episode four?" Evelyn nods. "Looks like it's back to cleaning then, huh?
"No," Evelyn refutes, her hand curling tighter in the fabric of Vera's shirt to hold on tighter, to pull herself closer as she realizes that maybe there are other, infinitely better, ways to calm herself. "Being with you is the best comfort I could ever recieve."
Smiling, Vera wraps her arms tighter around her, fingers stroking Evelyn's back softly, as the next episode begins to play.
Chapter 29
"How do I look?" She asks, smoothing out the front of her dress with clammy hands as she looks to Vera for support.
Today's the day. The day. The social worker is due to arrive in fifteen minutes and she can only remember a few days in her entire life where she's been this nervous.
"Amazing as always," Vera reassures, placing her hands on Evelyn's arms. "Just take a deep breath. Good."
She feels stronger, almost, with Vera's arms anchoring her. "But what if—"
Vera gives her arms a gentle squeeze. "Hey, no. We've gone through this."
"Regardless of the outcome, we've done our best," Evelyn nods in an attempt to convince herself. "Right."
In an effort to sooth away the distressed wrinkles marring Evelyn's forehead, Vera pulls Evelyn by the hips and kisses her soundly.
"Don't worry. We'll get through this together. Just stay calm."
With a hand resting against Vera's chest, her eyebrow quirks as she pulls away. "Judging by the increased rhythm of your pulse, I daresay you're really not as calm as you seem."
"Fake it till you make it, as the saying goes" Vera shrugs.
Her brow furrows. Sometimes Vera said the damnedest things.
"I'm not even going to ask."
The press of Vera's lips against hers is quick this time, and she leans forward on her toes to prolong the contact just a few moments as Vera pulls back.
"Just relax. It'll be a piece of cake."
"It's an interview to see if we are worthy enough for a child, Vera. This isn't something to be taken lightly."
"She's just someone coming by to get to know us, Evelyn," Vera replies, following Evelyn around the living room as she makes sure everything is just so. "So just be your usual nerdy, amazing self and we will be fine."
Evelyn pointedly looks up from straightening couch cushions. "And what about you?"
Vera smirks with a trademark eyebrow wag, "I'll try to behave."
At that moment, the doorbell rings—the noise instantly increasing Evelyn's pulse. She thought she was ready for this—with hours upon hours spent researching potential conversation topics, the statistical chance that they will get approved, staring at the computer screen well into the night until her eyes started to burn—but at this moment doubt creeps in and she thinks that maybe she isn't so prepared after all.
"She's early," she mutters. With a dry mouth and wide eyes, she looks to Vera. "Vera, she's early!"
Vera's eyes dart between the door and Evelyn, waiting to see how long, exactly, Evelyn will stand there looking shell-shocked and completely out of her element.
"Well answer it!" Vera finally urges after long moments, slightly pushing and pulling Evelyn to the door.
After pausing only slightly to gather herself, Evelyn pulls the door open. Standing on the other side is a stunning Latina woman with black hair perfectly angled just below her chin.
Her teeth nearly glow as she smiles, and a slight accent colors her words as she says, "Hello, I'm Elena, the social worker assigned to your case. We spoke on the phone?"
"Of course," Evelyn nods as she shakes her hand. "It's wonderful to finally meet you. I'm Evelyn Truby," she points to the presence behind her as Elena steps inside, "And this is my partner, Vera Banks.
"Hello, Ms. Banks," she greets, proffering her hand once again with the genuine smile still on her face.
It's clear why Elena took this job—she has one of those almost annoying, but somehow sweet personalities that instantly puts Vera at ease. Maybe, just maybe, this will go as well as she had tried to convince Evelyn it would.
"Please, call me Vera. Can I get you something to drink?"
Elena's eyes light up. "Water would be great if you don't mind. I have a particular penchant for being early and left the office without mine, I'm afraid."
"Double water on the rocks, coming right up," Vera jokes as she turns towards the kitchen.
Evelyn's eyes instantly widen. She is 100 percent sure she remembers Vera saying she was going to behave.
"It's okay," Elena grins in response to Evelyn's nervous glance. "People often fail to forget that I have a sense of humor just like everyone else."
"Well then Vera should keep you sufficiently entertained," she says, watching with adoration Vera moves around the small kitchen. She never could stay upset with her for long."Would you rather sit in the living room or at the dining table?"
"Whichever is the most comfortable preferably. We'll be seeing a lot of each other in the coming months so there's no sense in formalities," Elena easily replies.
She leads Elena to the living room, offering her a spot the couch so she could have the best view of the small room, and taking her own spot on the love seat. When Vera joins them moments later, she sits as closely to Vera as she can—their hips and legs flush together, and her hand resting softly on Vera's thigh—siphoning strength from the woman beside her.
An almost awkward silence fills the room as Elena shuffles around in her briefcase for papers and a pen. "So," she begins, "This is a preliminary visit to make sure everything is up to par and so I can determine if you're a good fit for Noah." She looks up at them with a smile. "Remember, I'm trying to rule you in, not rule you out. So just relax, be honest, and everything will fall into place, okay?"
Vera gives her hand a gentle squeeze before they both nod their understanding. Evelyn feels like she could almost be angry—being made to sit here and be approved to take care of Noah when he is so obviously in much worse hands, but it helps that Vera is right by her side and will be the entire time. It quells her anger; gives her the strength and conviction to get through this and get through it together.
"Good! I'm going to start off by asking the both of you a few questions that will help me get to know you. There are no right or wrong answers, only honest answers. So do your best to be open with me, and I will be open with you." Elena's smile seems to permanently sit on her face at this point, Vera muses, and she only takes a moment to glance down at the paper on her clipboard paper.
"So, first things first. If the adoption does get approved, will Vera eventually try for a second parent adoption?"
"Yeah," Vera replies instantly. But then she looks to Evelyn curiously. "Yes?"
"Yes," Evelyn nods in confirmation to Vera, squeezing her leg. "Absolutely, yes."
Nodding, Elena taps her pen against the papers. "And how do you feel about Evelyn getting primary adoption rights while you have to wait to get the same privilege?"
"It obviously sucks," Vera responds with a slight shrug. "But it's worth it you know? I'm lucky to be getting the privilege at all."
"Why do you say that?"
Vera begins to squirm in her seat. This is beginning to feel like all the mandatory hours she's spent at shrinks over the years. A
nd if there's anything she hates, it's being cross-examined by an outsider. But this is important—important to her and Evelyn and Noah—so she can't exactly give a snide remark and shut down like she used to. No. There's too much at stake for that.
Instead, she plasters on the best expression she can and utters out her words in a deep exhale, "Um, well. I'm just…lucky, you know? To have Evelyn and to hopefully have Noah too…I just feel incredibly lucky to get the chance to add him to our family."
"So you consider you and Evelyn a familial unit?"
"Yeah, of course," Vera answers instantaneously.
Nodding, Elena turns her attention to Evelyn. "Do you feel the same, Evelyn?"
She thinks of Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's; of coming home and falling into Vera's open arms without needed a reason to do so other than because she wanted to. Of how Vera makes her feel and how she never felt this wanted and safe with her own family. Because this is it. This is family. There is no question about it.
"Yes," she replies, looking to Vera with a soft grin. "Absolutely."
Elena, while jotting something down on her notepad, asks, "And how do you define family?"
"Unconditional love," Vera answers, sneaking a glance at Evelyn out of the corner of her eye. "And knowing there is a certain level of support you'll always receive from them no matter what."
"You also have a certain level of comfort when you're around them," Evelyn adds. "And while it's impossible to always be happy, you're happiest while being near them."
"I think that makes a great definition," Elena flashes her trademark smile. "Do you think you have all of that with Vera?"
"I certainly think so," she affirms. "But not only do I have all of that with her, she also brought her own family into my life as well. They've accepted me whole-heartedly. I went from being just myself, to being a part of something very kind and loving. I can't imagine my life without them in it."
"That's so wonderful to hear," Elena commends brightly. "Now, if you would just…give me a moment…"