They were the first to arrive, as he’d planned, because he wanted time to evaluate the location and find a good vantage point. He wasn’t taking the chance of Bruce sneaking up on them while they were out with the kids. He let Frankie off her leash, knowing she wouldn’t wander far.
“How about the picnic table under those trees?” he suggested after surveying the play area, shelterhouse, and soccer fields. The trees would give them cover if they needed it, and the spot on the edge of the park allowed him to see nearly everything, including the parking lot.
“Fine with me,” she said briskly, her first words since leaving the house. “I can put Luke on a blanket in the shade. He’ll like that.”
He wanted to ask if she might enjoy the visit, even a little. She liked his sisters-in-law, or seemed to, and their kids were great. Alex wanted Luke to be close with his cousins, even though he was too little to play with them for now. When he was bigger, they’d play together, forming bonds that would last.
When they reached the picnic table, Alex helped Soledad unpack what Luke needed from the stroller. He shot her a sharp look when she placed a bottle of Cherry Coke, his favorite soda, on the table near him. Her only response was a shrug, but it surprised him that she’d thought of him when she was preparing for the picnic. Things rarely happened that he didn’t expect.
“Thanks,” he said, loosening the cap while he searched for the right words to say to her.
“I thought you’d get thirsty.” She took a drink from her bottle of ginger ale.
His eyes went to her throat, watching the muscles that worked there—the same movement that had led him to kiss her on the back porch. She lowered the bottle, flushing pink. Her thoughts were apparently in sync with his. They hadn’t talked about the kiss, and they should, even if he didn’t want to. An adult conversation would help to establish some boundaries and clear the air between them… but it might also close off possibilities. He realized he didn’t want to do that yet. What the hell? He’d decided not to pursue a relationship with her, but now…
“Here’s Colin and Lily,” she said, shifting her attention away from him.
Christ. The newcomers had gotten within twenty yards of them without Alex being aware of it. His guard had come down when his desire for Soledad ramped up. Stupid mistake. He rose to greet his brother.
“Hi,” Lily called. She held Colin’s hand as Sofia ran toward Alex and Soledad. The three-year-old dashed to where Luke lay on a blanket and dropped to her knees next to him, seemingly mesmerized.
“She’s curious about babies,” Colin said as he reached Alex and shook his hand. “Good to see you, Soledad.”
“Thanks. You, too.” Soledad smiled at Colin before turning her attention to Lily and the kids.
“Zach was getting his brood out of the car. They’ll be here in a minute,” Colin said, his eyes tracking to his wife and daughter.
“Glad you could make it,” Alex commented.
“It’s a beautiful Sunday afternoon. Going to the park’s a great idea.” Colin directed a look at Alex, a look that said he knew this was more than it seemed on the surface.
A few minutes later, Zach and Carolyn walked toward them. Zach was carrying Erin, their eight-month-old, while their toddler, Austin, raced toward the other children and Frankie, who yapped excitedly.
“I’ll take this one.” Carolyn reached for the baby girl. “You boys probably want to talk.”
“What’ll you be doing?” Zach asked.
“The same, but I’m guessing our subject matter will be different. Alex has a serious look about him.”
“He always does,” Zach said, giving Alex a punch in the arm. “I’m the light-hearted one of this crew.”
Carolyn laughed at her husband’s words. “Right.” She took the baby to where Soledad and Lily sat at the picnic table with the kids playing beside them.
Alex took another scan of their surroundings, knowing his brothers had already done the same out of habit. His eyes lingered on Soledad before he shifted his attention away from her.
* * *
Soledad stroked Frankie’s head as she listened to Carolyn and Lily talk. As much as she enjoyed being out of the house and having adult company other than Alex, she had mixed feelings about this playdate. Alex’s sisters-in-law had always been kind to her, both when she and Alex were dating and since Luke’s birth. But she wasn’t in the club. She was the baby mama, not a girlfriend, fiancée, or wife. She felt like an outsider despite the easy conversation.
“Chase me,” Sofia yelled, getting Frankie’s attention. The dog ran off after Sofia and Austin, chasing first one and then the other across the grass.
“They’ll all be exhausted tonight,” Carolyn said with a laugh.
“Getting out of bed is exhausting,” Lily commented, stretching her legs out in front of her.
“It’ll pass, sweetheart,” Carolyn comforted her. “The first few months are tiring. Isn’t that right, Soledad?”
“That was my experience,” Soledad confirmed. She’d been tired and worried about her situation almost from the beginning of her pregnancy, which had left little time to enjoy it as many women claimed they did.
“Before you know it, you’ll have a beautiful baby to love.” Carolyn kept her eyes on Erin, who was sitting on the blanket near Luke. “It’s nice they’ll all grow up together. I love it that the cousins can play with each other.”
Soledad kept her thoughts to herself, uncertain how much connection she’d have to Alex’s family down the road. The kids would build a relationship, since their fathers were so close, but this big family thing was foreign to her. Her own family was very small, with just her mother, an aunt, and one cousin.
“And we’ll get some girl time, too. Nice for us,” Lily said, smiling. “Which brings me to an important question, Soledad.”
“What’s that?” she asked, feeling like a spotlight had just found her in a crowd.
“Are you and Alex still pretending to be nothing more than responsible adults with this co-parenting friendship thing?” Lily posed the question, but both women’s attention was focused on Soledad.
“We’re not pretending,” she said. “That’s what we are. What else would we be?” Soledad tried to keep her voice casual, but she felt the glare of the imaginary spotlight.
“I think you know,” Lily continued. “We can all see the looks you give each other when you think no one will see. I noticed it when I visited you last week, and I’m definitely seeing the same thing today.”
Soledad refused to glance in Alex’s direction and kept her attention on Luke, who was staring up at Erin. Soledad couldn’t deny that she had taken quick looks at Alex during her conversation with Carolyn and Lily. And she’d had no reason to. She couldn’t use the excuse that she was checking on Luke, since he was in front of her.
“Oh, Lily,” Carolyn said with a shake of her head. “I thought we agreed not to bring it up.”
Oh, God. They’d talked about her and Alex. Soledad could feel her face get hot.
“Come on. We have to help them out,” Lily insisted, her tone friendly.
“There’s nothing between Alex and me,” Soledad declared before Lily could continue, “other than caring for Luke. No relationship. We’re only living in the same house because of my employment situation. Luke and I will be moving out as soon as I can find work again and get an apartment.” That time was approaching rapidly, since Luke was almost two months old. She’d perused a few job sites in the past week, but nothing seemed like a good fit and her heart wasn’t in the search. Soon, though, she’d have to make changes in her life.
“You don’t really believe that, do you? Listen, I know how tough it is to live with someone and try to resist the attraction. Colin and I failed at it, and I couldn’t be happier.” Lily had been Colin’s nanny when a relationship developed between them, which soon led to marriage and now a child together.
Good for Lily, but unlike his brother, Alex wasn’t the marrying kind. T
he thought suddenly made Soledad very sad. The family curse had won. Her mother was right. Soledad cared for a man who would never return her affections, not the way she wanted him to. But those were facts she didn’t plan to confide to these two well-meaning women.
“Our situation is not the same as yours and Colin’s,” she said, trying her best to sound logical. “We have no future together other than shared parenting for our son. We’d broken up before Alex left for his last mission. You know that.”
“We never did know why, though,” Carolyn’s tone was gentle. “Can I take a guess?”
There was that spotlight again—a little dimmer, but once again highlighting all of Soledad’s worries. “I…” she started to respond but had no idea what to say.
“I once ended my relationship with Zach because I could no longer take waiting at home for him when he was off on a mission. The not knowing where he was and if he was okay was a killer.” Carolyn glanced toward her husband, making Soledad follow her gaze. The three men stood close together, obviously engaged in a serious discussion. “Being with an active SEAL is way harder than it seems. They’re great men, loyal and courageous, but the women in their lives have to share those qualities with the job.”
Ten times worse, Soledad silently agreed. The missions were longer and inherently more dangerous. Carolyn was right, too. Alex’s work was certainly part of the reason their relationship ended. The rest was that he wouldn’t let her get too close to him.
“I’ve known the Vale boys for a long time,” Carolyn went on. “They’ve been through so much together, but their reactions to adversity are all different. Zach wants to control everything, and Colin believes everything has a place. But Alex puts on the devil-may-care attitude and pretends not to give a darn because he’s guarding his heart. He’s unwilling to risk getting hurt again, so he closes himself off from everyone except his brothers.”
How was Soledad supposed to respond to Carolyn’s honesty when the other woman had pegged Alex and the difficulty between them to a T? Soledad had gotten a peek under the surface at Alex’s vulnerability just before he shut her out when their relationship ended a year ago. She’d had glimpses again in the past months, too, especially when Alex didn’t think she was paying attention. She cherished those unguarded moments when she saw the man he truly was.
But could they have a real relationship, as Lily and Carolyn were suggesting?
Fortunately, Luke let out a cry just then. Soledad rose and scooped him up, taking him for a walk under the trees while she tried to sort through all that had been said.
* * *
“So are playdates in the park a replacement for our poker nights now?” Colin asked. “I figure they must be, since you’ve bailed on every one since you’ve been back in town.”
“Cut him some slack,” Zach said. “When you’ve got a newborn in the house, you’ll understand how demanding the little bundles are.”
“Soon enough,” Colin said with a grin and a glance toward his wife, who waved and blew him a kiss.
“Take my advice and sleep lots now. Right, Alex?” his oldest brother asked.
“Sure, yeah,” Alex said, half listening as he focused on Soledad where she sat between Lily and Carolyn. Her attention was directed at the kids as she talked with his brothers’ wives. It looked like a friendly conversation, so Alex tilted his head, indicating for his brothers to follow him. He didn’t want any of what he had to say to reach Soledad’s ears.
“What’s on your mind?” Colin asked when they’d moved off an additional fifteen feet. All bantering was over as they formed a tight circle.
“I’ll get straight to it. There was a situation on my last mission that you both need to be aware of because it might come back to bite me, you, and them.” Alex nodded to their families.
“Give us the intel,” Zach ordered, all of them alert as if they were on a mission.
Alex didn’t hesitate. “I turned in a fellow SEAL for misconduct just before we shipped home from Afghanistan. Guy by the name of Bruce Lewis. Do you know him?”
“I know Lewis,” Zach said. “He’s a jackass.”
“No denying that, but he’s a well-connected jackass,” Alex said, “which he thought made him above the rules.”
“So what was his game?” Colin’s skill was stripping everything down and gathering the details.
“He got involved in the opium trade,” Alex said. “He was even peddling that shit to his fellow SEALs. I realized what was up when I was working with one of the local agricultural cohorts and heard his name mentioned. They compared me to him because we were in the same unit, but I was interested in saffron while Bruce was breaking the rules in a way I couldn’t overlook. So I reported him to our commanding officer.”
“You did the right thing. SEAL units only work if everyone is aboveboard,” Zach declared.
“I thought so,” Alex agreed, “but it might come back to bite me in the ass. Thanks to his family, he got a slap on the wrist for punishment… but they couldn’t get him out of a letter in his permanent file.”
Colin let out a low whistle. “Career-buster.”
“Exactly. And he’s blaming me.”
“So that’s why you needed the security system,” Colin concluded.
Steve sometimes came to their poker nights, so it didn’t surprise Alex that he would have mentioned Alex’s situation to Colin. Both his brothers had had close calls soon after they transitioned to civilian life and were forced to take measures to protect their families.
“But this might not stop with me. He knows we’re close,” Alex said, gesturing between them. “I’m sorry I’ve put you guys and your families in danger. I never thought this would come back on anyone but me.”
“Not your fault,” Colin said. “Your decision to report him probably saved lives.”
“Yeah, but it’s putting lives at risk now. Theirs.” He gestured to the picnic table where the three women talked while the kids played.
“We’ll protect them. We have before,” Colin said, “and if there’s any guilt here, it lands squarely and solely at Lewis’s feet. Not yours.”
“Colin’s right,” Zach added. “We’ll fend this off if we need to. What can we do now?”
“Locate Bruce. I got a card from him yesterday. My guess is that he’s nearby. I’m sticking to Soledad and Luke, keeping them inside as much as I can, but I need to know where he is.”
“Have you told Soledad about this?” Zach asked.
“No, and I won’t if I can avoid it.” It would only add another layer of tension on top of a fraught situation between them.
“You might want to rethink that, bro,” Colin said. “Women don’t like to be kept in the dark.”
“She’s got a lot on her plate already.” It was an excuse, and he admitted to himself that his brother was right. Soledad would be livid if she learned he’d kept this from her. He’d accept that risk. “I need your connections to locate Bruce.” His brothers both worked for security firms and could use their networks.
“I’ll make some calls,” Zach said.
“And I’ll see what I can find on him in the cyber world. Maybe he’s used his credit cards lately. We’ll find him,” Colin said, “and if he makes the mistake of coming after any of us, he’ll regret it.”
Having his brothers’ backing was useful, but Alex was still worried. He’d trained with Bruce, knew what the other man was capable of—knew that he had no qualms about harming people who got in his way. That and a thirst for revenge made Bruce a powerful enemy, not to mention the worst sort of man.
Alex’s eyes tracked to Soledad. A few seconds earlier, Luke had let out a tiny cry and she’d picked him up. Now she was walking in the shade of the trees with their son on her shoulder. She didn’t look in Alex’s direction. It almost seemed as though she was trying not to.
“It’ll be all right,” Zach said, playing the role of big brother.
“Hope so.” Alex wasn’t worried about Zach and Colin. They had
the training to defend themselves. But between them they had three women, four young children, and a dog that Alex’s actions had put in the path of danger.
That’s what had him tied in knots.
7
“Consider it,” Colin said over the phone two days later. “It’s a hell of an opportunity.”
“I will,” Alex replied. A job, one he was uniquely qualified for, had just opened up at the security firm where Colin worked. In the past hour, Alex had checked in with both his brothers about any intel on Bruce they might have discovered, but the possibility of a civilian job was another topic altogether. It had his wheels turning, taking him in an unexpected direction.
“I’ll keep digging.” Colin’s words brought him back to the problem at hand.
“Thanks, and be careful,” Alex said before hanging up. He didn’t need to remind his brother to be cautious. They all were by nature, and the situation had them adding an extra layer of vigilance. He supposed his brothers had told their wives about the potential danger. That was their choice; he’d made a different one. Not that Soledad was his wife. Far from it.
He blew out a breath, not letting himself get sidetracked with thoughts about his relationship with Soledad. The threat that hung over them was far more important. Bruce was off the grid, no sign of him anywhere despite Colin’s and Zach’s searches. To anyone else, that might seem like positive news, but it only heightened Alex’s worry. Bruce was up to something, and he couldn’t guess what. Not knowing left him feeling vulnerable, a sensation he despised.
Vulnerability only exacerbated his restlessness. The sense of being caged was not unusual for him. He spent most of his life feeling like a spring about to shoot off. He’d learned to control that spring under the admiral’s tutelage and through years of military training, but it coiled, waiting to be released.
He needed to take the edge off. Fresh air and a trip through the landscape he was creating in the backyard might do that. Soledad and Luke were out there, too. He pushed aside the realization that time spent with them helped unwind the spring as well. Moreover, any soothing effect of their presence was wiped away when he remembered the mess he’d made of his relationship with Soledad—on top of the danger he’d put them in. He scrubbed a hand over his face as he exited the house into his burgeoning garden with too many things on his mind.
The SEAL’s Pregnant Ex: The Admiral’s SEALs Book Three Page 5