I had to stop getting caught up in stupid, pointless sentimentality. This was a fake wedding, for God's sake. There was absolutely no reason to get emotional over it. Weddings were a con to begin with, clearly. The soaring divorce rate spoke to that. I was just helping Daniel take advantage of a very convenient loophole in the immigration laws of the United States that allowed for couples to stay together, if they were willing to sign a piece of paper. It was as simple as that. People did it all the time.
My resolve thus steeled, I drove to the salon with my head held high. If I seemed distant, people would simply write it off as nerves. I had nothing to worry about. I just had to get through the day, and after that, things would settle down into some version of normalcy that I hadn't quite figured out how to achieve yet. But I knew that I would.
Somehow.
Lindsey chattered at me the whole time we were getting our hair done. I nodded and smiled, but didn't hear a word of it. None of this meant anything. None of it mattered.
Walking through the marble archway of the art gallery, I was struck again by how breathtaking the place was. They had set up pew-style seating and laid out a long, red carpet for me to walk on.
I wandered aimlessly through the gallery until Lindsey chased me down, insisting that it was time for me to change into my dress. I'd completely lost track of the hour. I realized I hadn't seen Daniel all day, and I told her so.
"Don't worry," she said. "He's coming."
As if he wouldn't.
I was kept sequestered after that - God forbid anyone should see THE DRESS - but Lindsey wouldn't stop offering to get me things. Water? Champagne? Food? Juice? More food? I hated to keep saying no to her, but I really felt if I ate something I might throw up.
When I heard the music start playing, my stomach actually lurched.
Lindsey rushed in.
"Okay, we've got about ten minutes until go-time. How're you feeling?"
"Sick," I said, truthfully, staring at my reflection in the mirror. I tried to arrange my face into something that looked a little more like happiness, like I was marrying the man I loved. I vaguely succeeded.
"I have to go take my place," Lindsey said, after a few moments. "Just take some deep breaths. The band will switch over when they see you coming."
I sat there alone, waiting until the clock ticked over to the next hour, and then stood and walked out into the hallway.
My shoes clicked on the marble floor as I approached the carpet, and everyone turned to look. I was clutching my bouquet like a shield. I forced myself to stare straight ahead, looking at the officiant standing behind the pulpit, focusing on just putting one foot in front of the other. I didn't dare look at Daniel.
I didn't dare.
But I did.
He met my eyes and smiled - a little hesitantly, but his intent was obviously to give me courage to go on. I had to appreciate that. Lindsey was beaming next to him. I wondered if his conscience was eating him alive, lying to her like this. Mine certainly would, if I had any family who actually cared about me.
I forced a smile as I reached the front of the hall. Daniel took both of my hands and held them gently as the officiant spoke. Thankfully, we weren't doing any complicated vows. I just had to say "I do" when I was prompted. I was pretty sure I could handle that.
"…in sickness and in health…as long as you both shall live?"
Shit, I hadn't been paying attention. Which one of us was he talking to?
I waited for a beat. Daniel watched me expectantly.
Me, then. Okay.
"I do," I blurted out.
"You may kiss the bride."
I barely felt it when his lips pressed against mine - briefly, but long enough for the whole place to erupt in cheers.
We held hands and ran, handfuls of flower petals raining down on us from the guests - that was a nice touch. Daniel pulled me aside, into the room where I'd gotten dressed, closing the door behind him.
I don't know why I was expecting him to grab me by the shoulders and shove me up against the wall, kissing me passionately and telling me how much he wanted me. I knew it wasn't going to happen. Instead, he pulled out a chair and sat down, resting his elbows on his knees and rubbing his temples.
"Well, we survived that much," I said, helpfully.
"Yes," he said, dully. "But there's still the reception."
"With food and drinks," I reminded him. "So…silver lining, huh?"
He let out a huff of laughter. "I don’t think I could eat now if I tried."
"Yeah, me neither," I admitted. "So…what? Should we just leave and let them assume we wanted to start the honeymoon early?"
"They're already assuming that," he said. "Everyone saw me drag you in here. Let them. I just need a minute to clear my head."
"Just one minute?" I smiled. "You might want to wait a little longer than that, to keep up appearances."
He gave me a withering glance.
"Sorry, sorry," I muttered. "Trying to bring a little levity to the situation."
In the end, we did end up going to the reception. My stomach had settled a little, so I ate a few tiny sandwiches and downed a great deal of champagne. I talked and laughed with everyone I knew, and some people I didn't know. I recognized quite a few faces from the office (including Lisa, who I studiously avoided) but Daniel had somehow managed to fully populate the place, and as I worked my way around the room, I learned they were from every imaginable time and location - business connections, former accountants, even one of his business professors. Daniel certainly did a better job of keeping up with people than I did. Either that, or people were much more apt to drop everything and run to the wedding of a billionaire they knew than some girl they barely remembered.
As the night waned and the guests began to stifle yawns, I changed into a more casual dress - a sporty black number I'd ordered after Daniel gave me his card - and got my bags ready. John was waiting outside to drive us to the…airport, probably. Hell if I knew.
Daniel was in much better spirits as we climbed into the backseat of the town car, guests yelling their well-wishes after us. He even smiled when I put my hand on the back of his neck and pulled him into a kiss. For appearance's sake, of course.
After a short while on the highway, it became obvious that we were indeed going to the airport. Well, I'd know where we were headed soon enough. He couldn't keep it hidden forever. All he'd told me so far was to pack for warm weather, and that hardly narrowed it down very much.
Then, John bypassed the usual pick up/drop off points, going around through a back road that said "AIRPORT STAFF ONLY." I started to speak, but Daniel shook his head.
"Don't worry," he said. "I've made special arrangements."
I settled back in my seat. Well, then.
The road was narrow and winding, until it finally opened up…right on the tarmac. There was a plane parked in front of us - small, but still commercial-sized.
So that was how he planned to keep the surprise going. A chartered plane. Of course.
The brilliant bastard.
"I don't suppose there's any chance that somebody's going to tell me where we're going," I said, as Daniel and I crossed the tarmac, with John carrying our bags a few feet behind us.
Daniel shook his head, smiling, as John handed the bags off to someone standing by the bottom of the staircase that led up to the plane's entrance.
"Have a good trip, you two," said John, waving.
The inside of the plane was lavish and roomy, with white leather seats and every imaginable amenity. After we'd settled in, a platinum blond attendant took our drink orders, and before long we were soaring in the clouds, headed for an unknown destination.
"Will you at least tell me how long the flight's going to be?"
"Long enough," he said. "You'll want to settle in."
He wasn't kidding. I'd only been on planes a handful of times in my life, but I'd always had trouble sleeping on them. This plane, though, was a different situation entirely.
I could lean back as far as I wanted, curled up in the luxurious seat. Before I knew what was happening, Daniel was shaking me awake.
"We're about to land," he whispered, smiling.
When we disembarked, the heat was the first thing I noticed. It was thick and humid. There were palm trees in the distance.
"Welcome to Florida," the captain said, as we left.
Well, then.
"I hope you're taking me to Disney World," I told Daniel as we got into our taxi.
"No," he said. "Better. But first, we're going to the hotel to settle in."
A five-star hotel, naturally. I don't know why I would have expected anything different. We were in the honeymoon suite, on top of everything, so it was massive, and had its own Jacuzzi. I felt like I could get lost just inside our room. It had a dining table, for God's sake.
"What do they think we're going to do, entertain guests?" I wondered aloud, running my hand along the polished wood surface.
"Maybe we're supposed to 'christen' it," Daniel suggested with a half-smile. He'd come a long way - he was actually willing to joke about us having sex again.
I pulled my hand away quickly.
"Don't worry," he said. "This is a nice hotel. They actually clean all the surfaces."
"That's not what I read once in an email forward," I called after him as he disappeared into one of the other countless rooms.
I had a very welcome shower in the lavish bathroom, which had more water pressure than any other hotel I'd ever been to, combined. And it didn’t even smell like feet. Was this how the other half lived?
When I'd freshened up, I went out to meet Daniel in the main living area. He was flipping through the channels on the massive flat-screen television.
"Anything good on?"
"Is there ever?" he said. "Come on. We've got an appointment with someone I think you'll want to meet."
So he was determined to stay mysterious, then. Fine.
We got into another taxi for a short drive. As we drew closer to what was apparently our destination, I saw a massive white building in the distance. It was almost as wide as it was tall. I thought it looked vaguely familiar, but we were apparently approaching it from the back, so I couldn't see any identifying signs or markings.
Then, finally, something came into view.
A giant American flag.
And, on the other side, the NASA logo.
"You're not actually taking me to the moon, are you?" I said, staring.
"Sadly, that's not possible yet," he said. "Not even for me. But I got you the closest thing I could."
As the car pulled up to a door on the side of the building, I saw a woman walk out. She came towards the car with purpose.
After I climbed out, she offered me her hand.
"Hi," she said. "You must be Maddy. I'm Sam - I'm an astronaut."
"That's…that's cool," I said, dumbly.
She grinned. "A few years ago, I was the first woman to walk on the moon," she said. "I hear you're something of a moon enthusiast."
"I wouldn’t say that," I replied, a little stunned. "But I guess…I guess I always did kind of want to go there. It just looks so cool."
"It's pretty cool," she said, grinning. "If I could really take you there, I would. But since I can't, I'm going to give you the next best thing. Over the next three days, I'm going to put you two through a simulated astronaut training. Everything you'd do if you really were going to the moon. At the end, we'll do a simulated landing and moon walk. It's a new attraction - not open to the public yet, but when Daniel here wrote to use and told us about how he wanted to give you your dream vacation, we couldn't resist the opportunity. We wanted you to be the first to try it out."
I didn't know what to say.
"Are you pumped?" she asked, sounding pretty pumped herself.
"Yeah," I said. "I just…yeah. This isn't what I expected at all." I could feel myself grinning from ear to ear.
"That's a good thing, right?" said Sam. "The unexpected things are always the most fun."
"Oh, absolutely." I glanced at Daniel. He was beaming.
We walked inside then, slowly. I had to drink everything in. This had honestly been the last thing I'd ever expected - that he would remember what I said about wanting to go to the moon, and that he'd make an attempt to fulfill my impossible childhood dream. How much thought had he put into this? How much time had he spent? The money, I knew, was nothing to him. He could have given me any lavish gift in the world, any generic multi-million dollar vacation. But this was something else.
This was the sort of gift you give to someone that you truly care about.
The training, Sam informed me, wasn't to start until tomorrow. Today, we'd just take a tour of the astronaut hall of fame, taking in all the exhibits - the old space suits, the models, the photographs. Sam told us about her personal experiences as we went.
"When I heard they were doing another manned moon landing, I was one of the first to put my name in," she said. "A woman had never walked on the moon before. I couldn't resist the opportunity. Of course, every other female astronaut had the same idea. But of all the names, they picked mine." She took a deep breath, her eyes distant for a moment. "I'll never forget, as long as I live, how it felt to put my foot down on that rock. Some people told me I was crazy for even caring about it - just a pebble floating in space, nothing really special about it. I can't really explain why I wanted to go, but it was the most breathtaking experience. To see the earth like that. The stars. To be in space. It was my dream come true."
Briefly, I wondered if I was turning green.
"But enough about me!" Sam said, suddenly. "Come on. Let's show you the rest of the facility. There are some pretty amazing things that don't get shown on the regular tours, but I'd be happy to take you there."
With every step, I felt more and more like I must be dreaming. What kind of fake husband would go to this kind of trouble? There was an answer of course, in the back of my mind, quiet but persistent; I had to shut it down. No, no, no. He pushed you away. He doesn't want you to get attached. He doesn't have feelings for you; he just wants you to be happy so you don't try to get out of the deal.
We passed through the touristy areas, and soon Sam was taking us through doors that said "AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY." I held my breath as we stopped to look at instrument panels and control rooms, while Sam rattled off things that only halfway made sense to me.
When the tour was over, Sam handed us each a schedule for the next few days, detailing what we'd be doing for the next few days for our "astronaut training." Reading over it in the back of the cab on the way back to the hotel, I felt giddy. So maybe this wasn't quite what I would have imagined - but it really was the best of all possible honeymoons.
Chapter Eleven
Somehow, in my absence, I'd almost forgotten how beautiful our suite was. I was struck again as we walked in and Daniel hit a switch, lighting up the chandelier in the center of the room.
"This is really nice," I said, stupidly.
He smiled. "I'm glad you think so."
I stood in the center of the room for a moment, hugging my arms across my chest. I needed to say something. I needed to tell him what was running through my head, even if it didn't make any sense.
I needed him.
I couldn’t even look at the massive bed, covered in overstuffed pillows, without imagining him pressing me down into it.
"Daniel," I said.
He turned to look at me. I didn't know what I was planning on saying, exactly, but every word that came to mind just stuck in my throat. I swallowed and tried again, and to my absolute mortification I realized tears were leaking out of the corners of my eyes. I tried to look away, but he came over to me, swiftly, gently taking my face in his hands and lifting it up towards his. I tried to smile, but it wavered.
"What's wrong?" he asked softly. "I mean…you know. Apart from the obvious." He, too, was trying to smile and not quite succeeding.
"Nothing," I
said, in a voice thick from crying. Well, that was convincing.
"Really," he said. "Why don't I believe you?"
I laughed a little, through my tears. "I'm sorry," I said. "I'm really sorry."
"Please don't apologize."
I shook my head. "Not for that. I'm sorry for…letting things get too personal." I sniffed. "You know what I mean."
"Please don't apologize for that, either," he said. "I shouldn't have…I never should have…" He hesitated. "I'm sorry," he finished, finally.
"Maybe neither one of us really has anything to be sorry for," I said.
"Maybe," he said, with a spark in his eye that made my fingertips tingle.
"It was stupid, right?" I said, blinking the last of the tears away. "Saying we wouldn't let things get personal? Of course it's going to get personal. It's only natural. There's no harm in that, is there?" I cleared my throat. "I mean, as long as we keep our heads on straight."
"Can we?" He looked…skeptical. And, at the very same time, he looked like he didn't really want to be.
I shrugged a little. "Does it matter?"
He looked at me, his lips parted just slightly. Like he wanted to say something, but he didn't know how.
"Are you sure?" he said, finally. "Are you…absolutely sure?"
I went up on tiptoes and pressed my lips against his.
At that moment, it was like something snapped inside of him. More so than when I'd kissed him before - now I realized he'd been holding himself back even then. I could feel it in his body pressed against mine, in his touch.
I realized he was moving, propelling me backwards, until I felt myself pushed against the wall while his mouth devoured mine. He let go of my face and grabbed my wrists, hard - almost to the point of hurting - raising my arms up against the wall too, pinning my hands above my head. I felt deliciously helpless. Something inside me, a heat that had been growing since the first time I'd laid eyes on him, grew and grew. My blood felt molten in my veins. If he didn't touch something other than my wrists soon, I was going to explode.
He pressed his knee between my thighs.
I moaned, feeling myself swell against the hard muscle of his leg. He finally let my wrists go. I grabbed him by the shoulders, pulling him impossibly closer.
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