I didn’t walk on eggshells around him; I walked on the glass shards of his broken pride. Broken because of me.
“What are you celebrating?” he demanded.
I only answered because I was sure he’d already overheard what I’d told Jimmy—and that was only if Emmett hadn’t informed him in the first place. “I just got hired for my dream job, if you must know.”
“Congratulations,” he replied with a voice that was as smooth as steel—that was how I knew the word was a knife that would eventually end up in my back.
“Thank you,” I forced out through clenched teeth. “But I know you’re not happy for me.”
“Oh, I am, J-bird. I am.”
I swallowed over the lump in my throat. I was missing something. He was dead serious about being happy for me—and he shouldn’t be. Something wasn’t right.
“Sorry, Chance. I don’t believe you,” I confessed. I’d seen him exactly one time since moving back—our run-in that turned into a blowup at the Ryder house a few weeks ago when he’d been looking for Ally. We hadn’t spoken since; there was no way we were now on magically good terms.
“I don’t care,” he replied coldly, leaning in closer to my face. I couldn’t suppress a shiver as his tongue licked a line from my cheek to my ear. “You’ll believe me tomorrow.” My leggings were drenched.
I might not be as brave as I’d hoped around him, but I wasn’t a complete coward. I didn’t move as his breath caressed my ear, my lungs choking on the sexual and spiteful tension between us.
Was it even possible that the way he treated me—the way he hated me –made me want him more?
So fucked up, Jessa.
“What’s tomorrow?” I knew he’d been waiting for me to ask.
“The day you realize that dreams can turn into nightmares with the flick of a switch.”
And just like that, the words took me back to the night that started it all…
‘Jessa, are you in here?’ I could hear Chance’s slurred words as he got to the kitchen door.
Before Nick could curse again at the darkness I’d doused us in, my hands fisted his shirt and I pushed my lips onto his. Nick Frost had a lot of faults. Being an eager participant in a kiss had never been one of them… until that kiss was forced on him by his best friend’s girl.
Nick tasted like a hot cup of weed watered with gin. Tongue deep in the prime example of intoxication, nausea rolled through me. I held it down because this was the only way… the only way to get him to leave me.
Even though my eyes were closed, I could tell when the lights came on. With the flick of a switch his dream became my nightmare. One-Mississippi, Two-Mississippi, Three-Mississippi. The hardest seconds of my life, keepings my lips where they were—where they shouldn’t be. It was that flick that kept Chance on the mountain where he belonged and turned me into the villain in a nightmare of my own making.
“The JBird Swizzle.” I blinked and gaped at Jimmy who somehow made it back in front of me.
Chance was gone; his presence replaced with pure dread.
How did he know Chance’s nickname for me? Why would he call the drink that?
“That’s the name of the drink, Jessa. It’s from a bar I used to work at in New York…” He slid the two pink frozen drinks towards me.
Of course, it was; Chance probably knew it, too.
I gave my best attempt at a smile. “Thanks, Jimmy. They look delicious.”
Eight of Wands (Reversed): This card can indicate significant delays despite having a lot of energy and enthusiasm to progress forward; you are now being faced with multiple obstacles in your course. (This card can also indicate the feeling of guilt. Remember, nothing can change the past. Guilt can only create change in your future actions. Sometimes, the best thing to do is forgive yourself.)
“ALRIGHT, MISS MADISON.” I JUMPED at Dr. Lev’s voice behind me. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”
I turned from where I was cleaning up from my lunch. “That’s ok,” I smiled trying my very best not to call him Santa.
“I wanted to check in and see how your morning went. Kyle said you seemed to be doing very well.”
Since I was new, I started the morning off shadowing one of the two head physical therapists—Kyle Masters. I didn’t know it was physically possible for someone to be so good-looking and so sweet. He was like the male version of Tammy—kind, considerate, funny—and you only needed less than fifteen minutes in his presence to figure it out.
After going over the ropes, he showed me around the place a little more before we broke for lunch.
“He’s great. Gave me a lot of good tips,” I replied with a smile.
“Wonderful. Once we remodel the second floor, maybe the two of you can share an office.”
Kyle had explained that they’d needed more space on the first floor for new equipment from a grant, so they’d had to remove some offices in order to make room. Right now, all the PT’s only had this conference room on the second floor of the building where we could set our stuff. There were a few computers in there that we could use for our chart notes and things like that. When Kyle had shown me yesterday, Monroe was in there with the same nurse and tech gossiping about something—or someone. From the way Kyle explained the room, he made it seem like because of the inhabitants, it wasn’t very conducive to getting work done.
“So are you ready for the afternoon? For your first patient?”
Hold the phone. I froze. “I have a patient?” My heart raced. As of yesterday, there was no one in my schedule so I was planning on shadowing another one of the PT’s this afternoon.
“You do. I assumed he would have told you since he said he was a friend when he requested you…” Why was he looking at me like that? With curiosity. “Didn’t you see your schedule?”
Not wanting to look inept on my second day of work (a ridiculous notion), I nodded. “Oh, right. Yes. Sorry. I thought you meant tomorrow for… some… reason…” I trailed off lamely, but Dr. Lev had already moved on, hopefully without noticing my obliviousness.
Who would have requested me? I bit back a groan. The last thing I needed was to look like an idiot on my first official day.
“I figured I would come and grab you since he’s here. Figured I could review his case quickly while we walk down to meet him.”
For the first time, I wished there was a paper chart for him to hand me, but now that everything in the medical world was digital; all patient information was located on the iPad I’d been given that was currently charging downstairs in the clinic.
“So, the patient broke his knee several months ago…” Patellar fracture. Skeletal? Ligaments? My mind was racing through everything that I knew. “Corrective surgery was performed after the secondary damage was done. The patient was supposed to start his PT a few weeks ago but never showed.”
“The secondary surgery? Was he in a cast for that? Did he re-fracture something? Was there any program worked out for him or should I be creating my own?”
“No, no cast. He was recommended to our facility because of our aquatherapy and I know that’s where he started yesterday. Other than that, I didn’t see anything specific noted in his chart.” Later, I would attribute my frazzled ADD to the fact that it was my first day and I didn’t realize that I was going to have a patient. Later, I would also kick myself for not stopping to listen to what Dr. Lev was saying. Maybe then, what happened next wouldn’t have made me feel like I was having a stroke and a heart attack all at once.
Dr. Lev held the door open for me as we came down the stairs. “I wanted to…” he cleared his throat, “give you a head’s up that he might be… difficult.”
Just what I needed for my first day. Difficult.
“I’m sure I can handle it,” I said confidently.
“Well, if he gives you any trouble, don’t hesitate to come find me.”
We rounded the corner and I stopped so hard I’m surprised I didn’t give myself whiplash.
I would have
taken difficult any day. Any. Day. Over Chance Ryder.
“Mr. Ryder,” Dr. Lev greeted my gorgeous ex with a firm shake and a curious eye back at me. “I wanted to come down and introduce you to your new trainer, Ms. Jessa Madison.”
It didn’t matter that I didn’t move. Chance walked to me. He preyed on me. And all the while, his dark smirk that mirrored the one from his warning grew.
He knew the whole time. This was all a game for him.
“Ms. Madison and I already know each other, don’t we, Jessa?” He drawled my name like he knew just how far he could string me out.
I gulped. Pull your shit together, Jess.
“Yes.” Forcing a smile was like trying to punch through a rock wall. “From high school, right?”
That looked like it gave his pride a little bit of a bump. He deserved it—and more—for this.
“Thanks, Dr. Lev.” I brushed by Chance, grabbing my iPad from its dock behind the staff counter. “Mr. Ryder, if you want to follow me. We can get your session started.”
I didn’t wait for him to follow as I walked into the gym. I didn’t want to make any more of a scene and I needed a few steps to compose myself. My dream job was quickly taking a turn for the worse.
“Surprised?” He grinned, coming up next to me.
I couldn’t have been more surprised if he’d shown up and proposed to me.
“About what?” I asked sweetly. “That you’re my first patient? Yes. That you did this on purpose because you’re an ass? No.” I kept my eyes focused on anything except for him—the doors to the gym, Monroe giving me an ugly look as I walked by her, the entrance to the aquatherapy room—while he laughed beside me.
“And here I thought you would be so happy to see me—to help me.”
I spun on him, my hand on the door to the pool room. “Should I be? Knowing how you feel about me?”
All the twisted amusement dropped from his face. His head came towards mine so fast I thought he was going to kiss me. The memories of the things those lips could do were arguably worse than the kiss would have been.
“No, J-bird. You shouldn’t,” he rasped as his blue eyes brewed into a storm. “You should be afraid.”
“Afraid?” Even my whisper broke underneath his stare.
“I’m going to break you, Jessa. And I’m going to enjoy every fucking minute of it.” It was strange to hear about your own downfall from someone who said it with a smile on his face.
There were only three things in this world that could survive a nuclear holocaust: cockroaches, Twinkies, and Chance’s hatred for me.
This was my problem with Chance Ryder. No, not the fact that even his anger made me ache for him. From the very start, I ate up every sign that he was bad news as eagerly as Hansel and Gretel ate the candy that was only leading them to their doom.
His lips were so close and he wasn’t the only one who wondered if some things still tasted the same. And he knew it, too. Damn him.
“Good luck with that.” I pushed the door open behind me, practically falling back into the room.
Please don’t let us be the only ones in here.
I bit back my groan as my quick scan of the room confirmed I was not that lucky.
“Ok, so your chart says that you started in the HydroWorx yesterday, so I’d like to keep that the same for now until I review everything and come up with a tailored plan.”
“Whatever you say, J-bird.”
My eyes flicked up to him from underneath my eyelids. I expected pushback. Or at the very least some sort of comment. Instead his face was blank—devoid of the vengeful determination that had been there a minute ago.
I knew I was in trouble—I knew he was out to destroy me the moment I saw him for the first-time a few weeks ago. Our subsequent conversations, followed by his most recent admission only confirmed it. Even though he’d taken me by surprise this morning by becoming my patient, my guard was up.
My guard was up like the fucking ice wall in Game of Thrones—built high and thick to protect me from the one man who had nothing else to lose.
And even though Chance was a whole lot hotter than any White Walkers, his eyes were just as blue—and those eyes that told me he was going to rip my life from me if it was the last thing that he did.
His lips curled up slightly, waiting for my next instruction.
“I… umm… ok, well if you want to get in the pool, we can get started with the same exercises that you did yesterday.”
“Are you asking me to take my clothes off? I don’t think you’ve ever asked so nicely before, J-bird.” His smile got even bigger as his hands went to his waist, tugging his shirt from his jeans.
“Please stop calling me that.” A pointless request that would probably only have the opposite effect. “And yes, unless you normally get in a pool fully clothed—“
“You want me to call you Jessa? Or how about Miss Madison?” Dammit. The way he said my names was like he was fucking each and every syllable. I should have let him stick with J-bird.
“Either,” I grit out, returning my gaze to my iPad. I didn’t need to watch him strip. I wanted to, but I didn’t need to. I scrolled through the poorly written notes, figuring out what to say next. I needed to keep it professional. He was only here for five weeks.
Five. Weeks.
That’s it.
I needed to stomach this—and try to keep my hands and my eyes to myself—for five weeks. If he’d requested me, that meant he had pull. I’m not surprised. The SnowmassHoles ran this town. Not only would refusing him potentially cost me my job if he reported it, but I’d be damned if I caved to him.
I’d lost enough to Chance Ryder—my innocence, my heart, my reputation, my home; I wasn’t going to give him this, too.
The sound of his belt buckle hitting the tile floor stirred me and before I could stop them, my eyes looked directly at him. Not at his eyes though, oh no. They didn’t make it that far.
I should have run. I should have run when I had the chance.
I hadn’t smiled this big in months. Standing there, butt-ass naked, I watched Jessa’s jaw hit the floor for the second time in under fifteen minutes.
God, if I had known how enjoyable this was going to be, I would have figured out a way to force my presence on her sooner.
Alright… It was a little fucking uncomfortable because of how badly I wanted to fuck her. Even with her damn hot pink hair up in a messy bun and scrubs that should not fit her like they did.
She looked different—all professional and in work mode. Yeah, she’d had her moments of focus back when we’d dated, but outside of those, she was so fucking wild and free. Never made sense to me why she wanted to go into healthcare—all rules and structure.
My cock was feeling a lot better now that it was free of my jeans, pointing decisively at exactly where it wanted to be. Damn thing had J-dar—always knowing when she was near.
And before… it was never a problem because she was always near—and always ready for me. No—always begging for me.
“If you leave your mouth open any longer there, J-bird, I’m going to assume it’s an invitation.” I smirked as she immediately closed her lips. Damn. A man could hope.
And so could my dick. With a memory fucking eight years long, it remembered exactly what those lips could do.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” she ground out, frantically looking around to see if someone was coming or could see in through the glass door to the room.
“You told me to take off my clothes.” I held my hands up. “I’m just doing what I’m told.”
I caught the towel that she whipped at my head.
“Yeah because I thought you had a bathing suit on!”
“And when did you give me time to go change?” I asked with a pleasantness that sounded like nails on a chalkboard. Her cheeks flushed and my dick jumped at the sight.
“Can you please cover yourself before you get me fired?” she hissed, her cool faltering.
Pe
rfect.
Laughing, I took my time wrapping the towel around my waist, enjoying every second that she couldn’t take her eyes off of me. “Nothing you haven’t seen before, J-bird.
“Yeah, well, I’ve also seen the Texas Chainsaw Massacre before. Doesn’t mean I’d like to repeat the experience.”
I watched the second she realized that her retort had backfired. I was the one who made her watch it because I knew it would end up with her in my lap and me in her.
“Whatever you say, Jessa.” I smirked and opened the door to the gym, not giving two shits as I strolled through with only the towel on, winking at Monroe as I walked by. She’d been pissed to see me with Jess; maybe this would soften her up a little. I might need her at some point.
I changed and made my way back to the pool, somewhat surprised to find her still waiting there for me. She was too stubborn to do what was good for her—which was anything that got her as far away from me as possible.
Time doesn’t heal all wounds. Time allowed what she did to me to fester and slowly eat away at me. My career had distracted me—the drive to win, to be the best, driving out memories of me at my worst. She didn’t have that luxury anymore.
“You sure you wouldn’t rather join me? I remember how much you love making waves,” I teased.
My suit that was definitely too fucking tight twitched over my dick as it remembered the night in my parent’s hot tub, too. That was the first night that she’d let me into that sweet ass of hers. I’d told her that I wasn’t fucking lying when I said that I was going to claim every last inch of her; I’d told her that it was her last chance to run. And she’d untied the tiny-ass strings to her bikini.
“Just get in the pool, Chance.” Arms over her chest, she looked at me like I was a naughty child. But she was the one whose cheeks matched the pink of her hair. Grinning, I slid into the warm water.
The Winter Games Box Set Page 76