Rage and Redemption

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Rage and Redemption Page 7

by Cyndi Friberg


  “You can trust me with your life.” Conviction rang in his tone. “No harm will come to you while you are in my care.”

  “How can I believe that when you will not even tell me what you are?” He reached out to her and she twisted away. “Do not touch me. My entire life I believed in a person who does not exist. I will mourn for my friend and mentor. I do not know what to make of you.”

  Ignoring his pain-filled call, she rushed out into the bailey and headed in the opposite direction from Brother Gabriel.

  When had the world gone mad?

  She didn’t want to meet this Frenchman and yet she wanted nothing more. She wanted to scream and she wanted to weep, but she no longer had a shoulder to cry upon. Ignoring the twinges of pain in her ankle, she hobbled back toward the dormitory.

  Many lonely nights she had tossed in her bed wondering about her parents. How had her mother come to be in Jerusalem alone, lost or deserted, at the mercy of strangers? Did her father know she existed? Was he still alive somewhere, wondering what had become of her?

  The questions were unending once they began so Naomi forced them all aside. She longed to confide in Zarrah, but she was not yet sure what she would say. Would she simply explain that a man was making inquiries into her past or dare she share what she had seen the night before?

  If Brother Gabriel wouldn’t tell her what she had witnessed, how would Gideon respond? Was she brave enough to search him out and demand a clear, concise explanation?

  Tingling heat chased shivers down her spine. Gideon did nothing without a reason. If he gave her the answers she desired, what would he demand in return?

  * * * * *

  Church bells rang announcing Compline, but Naomi was too upset to pray. She sat in a secluded corner of the upper bailey informally dubbed the meditation garden. Stone benches scattered throughout the area invited others, but Naomi was glad to be alone.

  She toyed with the figs and nuts contained in the woven basket on her lap. Few actually reached her mouth. Having long since abandoned her sandals, she wiggled her toes in the prickly grass and angled her face to better catch the gentle evening breeze.

  What was she going to do?

  No one seemed to know where she could find Gideon. Half of the people she asked didn’t even know who he was. Even Brother Gabriel hadn’t been in any of his usual places. Were they together somewhere plotting their next move? She chuckled at the ridiculous thought and tossed a nut against the wall. They might share extraordinary abilities but they were still adversaries.

  “I was told you were searching for me.”

  His voice was so much a part of her thoughts that it took Naomi a moment to realize Gideon had really spoken. She looked to her right and found him standing indolently beneath one of the trees. His shoulder rested against the slender trunk, arms crossed over his chest.

  “Brother Aaron received a message from King Louis of France,” Naomi began as she set the basket on the bench beside her. “A man named Leon of Le Puy is making inquiries regarding an infant girl who was born in Jerusalem nineteen years ago.”

  “And you believe this infant girl is you?”

  “I don’t know what I believe. Brother Gabriel seemed…this is not why I was looking for you.”

  He grinned, a slow, salacious smile. Her nipples tightened against her chemise and she fought the urge to cross her arms. Attempting to hide the distinct bumps would only draw attention to her breasts, so she kept her hands in her lap.

  “Brother Gabriel won’t answer my questions. I was hoping you would—” In three long strides he stood before her, his hand cupping her cheek. She turned her face away. “Please don’t touch me. That is not why I came looking for you.”

  “Little liar,” he taunted, drawing her to her feet. “We were parted for less than a day and already you crave my touch. Did you dream about me again? Is that why you were searching for me? So I could show you what it feels like in reality?”

  In a flurry of angry movements, she snatched up the basket and threw the figs at him. Gideon only laughed and batted each aside.

  “You arrogant beast. I want nothing from you but information. When will you accept that fact?”

  A fig bounced off his cheek and Gideon reacted instinctively. He slapped the basket from her hand and shoved her against the curtain wall. His hands pressed against the stones on either side of her while he glared into her eyes.

  Fear exploded all around him, the rancid smell, the icy tension, the unwanted stimulation. “Do not push me too far, Naomi. I will retaliate.”

  He knew she was terrified—his senses didn’t lie—but her expression revealed none of her fear. Her wide blue eyes sparked with defiance and her shoulders remained stubbornly squared.

  “You don’t mean me harm,” she said emphatically. “Not physically at least. It wouldn’t serve your purpose.”

  “You have not begun to comprehend my purpose. Only a fool would believe otherwise.” He didn’t touch her, but a heated current flowed between them. He didn’t need to touch her to feel her.

  “If hurting me would accomplish what you have set out to do, you would have ended my life last night.”

  He moved closer, his craving for her a sweet agony. His clothing brushed hers. Her scent filled his nose and all he could see was her eyes. “Shall we speak of last night? What has Gabriel told you? Did he explain what you saw?”

  “He wouldn’t speak of it.” Her lips parted and her tongue darted out. “But you want me to know. That’s why I was looking for you. Why do you want me to know…? What is it you want me to know?”

  The stones were cool beneath his palms but desire raged through him. He wanted to kiss her, to touch and taste her. He wanted to feel her silken heat close around his shaft while his fangs sank slowly into her throat. Channeling the urgency of his need into his hands, he drove his fingernails into the wall.

  “You drew me there last night. I know you did. I would not have left the infirmary otherwise.” She prompted him when he didn’t speak. “So explain what I saw.”

  “You saw an angel lose control.”

  She laughed. The sound grated along Gideon’s frayed nerves.

  “You expect me to believe you’re an angel?”

  “I didn’t say I was an angel,” he said.

  “Brother Gabriel is an… Gabriel, as in the Holy Scriptures?”

  “Angels are not accurately represented in the Scriptures, but aye, some of what Gabriel has done is recorded there.”

  She swallowed and Gideon watched the movement of her throat. Her lips parted then pressed together. He could almost hear the questions racing inside her mind.

  “How can you be his brother if you aren’t an angel? Are angels born? I don’t understand any of this.”

  “Angels are not born, they are created. Gabriel and I were created together. Brother is simply the easiest way of explaining the bond that lies between us.”

  Her gaze shot to his as he spoke the last. “A bond so strong that you seek to destroy him? Gabriel told me you hope to punish him by…”

  When she couldn’t find the words, Gideon assisted her. “Possessing you.”

  “If you’re not an angel, then what are you?”

  “There are words for what I am,” he told her. “But I don’t think they would mean anything to you.”

  “Are you a fallen angel like Lucifer?”

  The question tore through his senses. Rage flared as his mind filled with unwanted memories. “When an angel Falls, he forfeits his immortal soul. If Gabriel is to be believed, my soul is still intact. At least for now.”

  As his explanation grew more specific, her fear rose again. He watched the pulse pound along her throat and felt each of her anxious breaths against his skin.

  “Why are you angry with Gabriel?”

  He could no longer ignore his need to touch her. Retracting his nails from the stone, he framed her face with his hands. “He betrayed me. He has chosen to participate in my punishment.”

>   “Punishment? Why are you being punished?”

  Gideon lost interest in the conversation. “I have a bad attitude.”

  Naomi’s head throbbed as she tried to assemble all of the fragments of information. The warmth of Gideon’s palms against her cheeks distracted her, muddled her thinking.

  His face descended slowly. She knew he meant to kiss her, but she didn’t turn away. The harder she fought, the better he liked it. The faster she ran, the more persistently he pursued.

  The first brush of his lips was soft and teasing. She inhaled his unique, spicy scent and allowed her mouth to relax, neither responding nor resisting.

  “Your skin is so soft,” he whispered. His fingertips danced along her jaw to stroke the column of her neck. “I want to touch you, Naomi. I want to touch all of you.”

  She shivered. Already liquid heat and tingling anticipation stirred within her body. He had to be a sorcerer. How could she hope to resist such skill? “You can make me want you, but it will never be more than physical desire.”

  His arm slipped around her waist, pressing her against his body. “What makes you think I want more?”

  His mouth sealed over hers before Naomi could respond. The taunting tenderness was gone. She did her best to hold her emotions back, to feel no more than the slide of his mouth against hers and the slow stroke of his tongue. But heat and friction gradually wore her down. She felt tingling sparks shoot down her spine and her toes curled into the grass.

  His fingers raked through her hair and splayed across the back of her head. Forceful now, his mouth urged her to accept the warm penetration of his tongue. A sharp, hollow ache erupted in response to the intimacy. She groaned and arched her body into his, needing to feel the unyielding contours of his form. Everything about him was hard and hot.

  He tore his mouth away from hers and Naomi murmured a breathless protest. How was he able to command her senses so effortlessly? Her head spun and all she could think about was getting closer to him, having more of him.

  He tilted her head and stroked his tongue along her throat. She had never realized her neck was so sensitive. Her breasts began to ache and the material of her chemise irritated her nipples. He scraped his teeth across her skin and Naomi moaned.

  Gently his hand cupped her aching breast. Even through her clothing the pressure felt wonderful. She wanted to strip naked and offer herself to the moonlight, the night wind and this man. Wild, primal urges, frightening in their intensity, made her arch into his hand.

  “Touch me, Naomi. Put your hands on me.”

  She didn’t question the command but burrowed through layers of clothing until she found bare skin. He groaned. His fingers plucked her nipple and she parted her legs, allowing his muscular thigh to rub against her aching sex.

  “Here. Touch me here.” He brought her hand down along his body, frantically pushing layers of clothing out of the way. Naomi gasped. She could scarcely close her fingers around him. Hot and hard within the circle of her fingers, his shaft jerked as if it had a mind of its own. Curving his fingers over hers, he showed her how to move, how to stroke him.

  Fascinated by the mystery that was Gideon, Naomi moved her hand up and down along his shaft. He rocked his hips while he explored her body with an ever bolder touch. He found her knee and pulled her leg up, angling her calf across his hip. Feeling the cool brush of the night wind against her heated flesh, Naomi released his cock and murmured a breathless protest.

  “Our first time will not be against a cold stone wall. Trust me. I’ll not hurt you.”

  His fingers parted her passion-slick folds and she whimpered, clutching his shoulders for support.

  “Keep your leg up,” he said.

  Then she felt him rub something hot and blunt against her. “You said—”

  He silenced her with his mouth. His tongue thrust deeply while he traced her slit over and over, sliding between her folds without pushing into her smoldering passage.

  Her leg shook and her fingers dug into his tense shoulders as he carefully worked between her thighs. Her delicate folds surrounded him, stretching wide to accommodate his breadth. Then his fingertips stroked that secret knot of nerves and her core exploded with sensation.

  She felt full and yet incredibly empty. Her inner muscles tightened and she wanted him there deep inside her, as he was meant to be.

  His fingers pressed harder, circled faster as he slid between her folds. All she’d have to do was shift the angle of her hips and he’d fill her, ending this teasing farce.

  He snarled and shook his head as if he’d sensed her brazen thoughts. Then he moved both hands to her hips and held her perfectly still as the slick pressure of his shaft continued to caress her.

  Tension gathered deep inside her, each sharp stroke accenting the building urgency. She panted, restless and dizzy.

  Then suddenly the tension burst, blasting trough her body with staggering intensity. She arched her hips, head thrown back as spasms of pleasure ripped through her.

  Jerking his pelvis backward, he dislodged her leg as he frantically stroked himself to completion. He shuddered and groaned. His seed arced from the tip of his cock and splattered in the dirt.

  She was enthralled by the sight, so primitive and carnal. Yet still she ached, wanting to feel those hot spurts erupting deep inside her.

  His powerful body shook and his fingers worked until the last drop of his release escaped. Then he blew out a heavy sigh and righted his clothing.

  Stunned by what they’d just done, Naomi hurriedly straitened her skirts and glanced around. She’d been so lost in passion, half the order could have strolled by and she’d not have noticed.

  He curved his fingers around the back of her neck and kissed her gently. “When we do this, really do this, it will be so much better.”

  He pulled her into the circle of his arms, hugging her to his tall, warm body. She pressed her face against his chest, embarrassed yet unafraid.

  Suddenly his head snapped up and he spun around. “Who goes there?” His voice cracked with authority.

  She covered her mouth with one hand. Had someone seen them? What was wrong with him? She saw no one.

  He spread his arms, his stance protective. “Show yourself!”

  “There’s no one here,” Naomi whispered, but even as she said the words the hairs on her arms and at the nape of her neck prickled. She could sense something.

  “Show yourself or be gone. I have no time for games.”

  Naomi wanted to laugh at that statement but tension gripped her muscles and made her pulse leap. Something was here, unseen yet present.

  “Who are you?” Gideon stepped away from her.

  Had he determined she wasn’t in danger or just forgotten she was there? She remained against the wall, crossing her arms to hide their shaking.

  Gideon turned in a slow circle, arms spread, eyes closed. “There,” he said, striding toward the space between a palm and the castle wall. “If you have no purpose here, be gone.”

  Naomi heard a distant, eerie laugh. It could have been a trick of the wind but suddenly the tension knotting her belly released.

  They were alone.

  “What was that?” she whispered as his posture began to relax. Her heart still pounded and every nerve in her body hummed with an awareness so acute it hurt.

  “I’m not certain.”

  Gideon took a step toward her. Naomi held out her arm to ward him off. Angels and unseen spirits. It was suddenly just too much. She needed to be away from him, far, far away.

  “No more,” she whispered. “Just leave me alone!”

  Naomi snatched up her sandals, hobbled past him and hurried along the path as quickly as her ankle would allow.

  Chapter Five

  Naomi folded her arms and rested them atop the thick battlement. From her vantage point high on the southeastern tower above the scriptorium, she could see the immensity of the castle compound. As one wandered through its numerous passageways and wards, it was
easy to forget the imposing grandeur of the Krak des Chevaliers. But standing here now with the wind kissing her face, Naomi was awed again by its majesty.

  This was her home, her fortress, her sanctuary and never before had she felt so besieged.

  The very foundation on which she had built her life had been shaken—was quaking still. How could she make rational decisions when the world no longer made sense?

  “You are being needlessly dramatic,” she spoke to the wind. “Surely other women have learned that their fathers are really angels and the only man they have ever been attracted to is not a man at all.”

  She laughed, needing the release but feeling only desperation.

  “You are not a stupid person. It is within your power to determine what is best for you. Gabriel is an angel, so how does that change your life?”

  Warmth caressed her back, though she faced the sun. She dragged in a deep breath, ignored the fist squeezing her heart, and slowly turned around.

  Gabriel stood there as she knew he would. His beautiful features expressed uncertainty and his hope that somehow she could still accept him.

  “What brings you here?” She did her best to sound casual.

  “A heavy heart.” He laced his fingers together, his gaze earnest and sad. “Naomi, I cannot bear it if you despise me.”

  Her skin prickled and the fist around her heart loosened just a bit. She searched his face, looking for the angel, seeing only her friend, her mentor and confidant.

  “Tell me truthfully, are you an angel?”

  His warm gaze met hers directly. “I am.”

  “Why did you keep this from me?” Tears burned the back of her throat.

  “There was no reason for you to know. It does not change who I am or how I feel about you.”

  The deception still stung yet it could not be changed so Naomi left it alone. “What is Gideon? He said he was once an angel but he is being punished. How is he being punished? What did he mean?” She whispered the questions, needing the answers and fearing she might receive them.

  He fiddled with the cross around his neck. “What do you know of angels? How do you perceive us?”

 

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