by Lu Hersey
“Well, maybe not quite the same. But you have her determination, and that’s no bad thing.”
I smile at her. “So how soon can we go?”
“Can you come back this evening? We need to prepare. I’ll have to make sure things are ready for us when we get there, so it’s safe.”
“What do you mean, prepare?”
“Think about it, Danni. We’re going to look for Crawford’s house. We need clothes.”
Until she said it, I hadn’t even considered how we’d manage when we got to Porthenys.
“Can’t we carry them with us tonight somehow?” I ask.
“It’s safer if I go first, by myself – I know what I’m doing. I’ll take the things we need over at high tide when the current’s not so strong. They should still be there when we go back this evening.”
“You mean we’ll have to get dressed on the beach? What if someone sees us?”
“They won’t, don’t worry. There’s an old slate miner’s cave in the cliff at the end of the beach – I’ll leave our bag in there. It’s mostly cut off from the beach except at low tide. We’ll have to time our visit so we can walk round from the cave before the tide cuts it off again.”
I don’t say anything. It still sounds risky to me, but we have no choice.
“Come on, let’s sort out what we need while you’re here.”
“But I didn’t bring any spare clothes with me!”
“That’s okay, you can have some of mine. Stay here by the fire. I’ll pop upstairs and see what I can find.”
A few moments later, Mamwyn comes back downstairs with an armful of clothes and dumps them on the floor by the fire. For herself, she’s chosen an old green woollen dress with a massive red reindeer on the front and a pair of turquoise leggings.
“I never wear these things, so they don’t matter,” she says, by way of explanation. Frankly I’m surprised she bought them in the first place, but I don’t say so.
For me, she’s picked the hideous navy trousers with the elasticated waist I borrowed the other night, an old-lady style woollen vest, and a strange garment made of nylon. It’s beige.
“What on earth’s that?” I ask.
“A cagoule. Should keep the draught out and it’s got some handy pockets.”
I pull a face. I can’t help it.
“I’ve got a nicer one, but I don’t want to lose it – and we’ll most likely have to leave our clothes there,” she says. “Have you got any money with you?”
“I’m not sure, why?”
“It might come in handy. You never know what’s going to happen. If we get stuck, having a few pounds can be useful. You can put it in the pocket of that cagoule.”
I feel in my jacket for my purse. “I’ve only got a five-pound note – will that do?”
“Plenty. We don’t want to take more – and I hope we don’t need it.”
As I pull the money out of my jacket, the weather charm Robert made comes out too and falls on the floor. Mamwyn is busy folding the clothes and doesn’t notice.
“We’re going to need a strong, waterproof plastic bag,” she says thoughtfully. “I’ll see if I can find one.”
She wanders out to the kitchen and I hear her opening drawers and rummaging about. While she’s out of the room, I pick up the charm and stuff it in the cagoule pocket with the money. We may need all the luck we can get and it can’t do any harm.
Mamwyn comes back with a green plastic bag with “bag for life” written on the front. “This should be strong enough, I reckon. I’ll get us some flip-flops.”
“Flip-flops? Won’t that be a bit cold?”
“We’ll be fine. They’re nice and light.”
Mamwyn adds a couple of pairs of old flip-flops to the pile, then squashes everything as far down in the bag as she can. She ties a knot in the top and pulls it tight. “Need to keep them dry if possible,” she mutters.
I feel for my phone in my jacket to check the time. It’s six-thirty.
“I need to go home, Mamwyn. Dad will be getting up soon. What time should I come back?”
“Low tide is about six this afternoon. We need to get there an hour before if we can, to give us time to search round Porthenys and avoid the stronger currents.”
“I’ll aim for four o’clock. Is that early enough?”
She smiles at me. “That’ll be perfect. Meanwhile I’ll take this bag over.”
I wonder how she’ll manage to pull the bag through the water when she’s in seal form. “Will you be all right by yourself?”
“I’ll be fine. I’m used to it. It won’t take too long and I can get some rest before this evening. I’d advise you to do the same if you can. Crawford’s clever as well as dangerous. My feeling is he hasn’t destroyed your mother’s sealskin yet – but getting it back isn’t going to be easy.”
Her words send a chill up my spine. We can’t afford to fail. We have to get it back, whatever it takes.
There’s no sound from upstairs when I get to Dad’s. I inch the bike carefully in through the back door and lean it against the wall in the downstairs passage. I tread lightly up the stairs, standing on the edge of each step trying not to make any creaking noises. But the second I open the door at the top that leads into Dad’s flat, Jackson ruins the whole thing. He makes a massive fuss of me, whining and jumping up and licking me as though I’ve been gone for months.
“Is that you, Danni? What’s up with Jackson? Are you taking him out for a walk?”
“Yes, I’m just getting his lead,” I say. Brilliant. Dad has just presented me with the perfect excuse for being up and dressed. I grab Jackson’s lead and he bounces down the stairs barking with excitement and runs to the back door, tail wagging furiously.
The lack of sleep and early morning activity starts to catch up with me as I walk Jackson down the high street towards the castle. There are a few people up and about now, and suddenly I spot Elliot heading for the bus stop to catch the school bus.
“Elliot! Hi!” I run across the road towards him.
“Danni! Do you make a habit of getting up this early?”
I smile. “No, not if I can help it.”
He goes to hug me, then pulls back suddenly. “Ouch!”
He looks like he’s in pain. “What’s wrong?”
“Dunno – got sudden heartburn – must have eaten breakfast too quickly.”
The school bus swings round the corner and for a moment everything is drowned by the noise of the driver hooting the horn to let all the local kids know he’s there.
“Better run – I’ll call you later, okay?”
I try to tell him I’m going to Mamwyn’s but the noise of the bus drowns out my words. Elliot turns round and mimes making a phone call and grins. I grin back, and wave as he climbs on board. I don’t bother to wait around for the bus to leave. I head off to take Jackson for a run in the grounds up by the castle.
The day drags and I find it impossible to complete any schoolwork. Dad’s busy in the shop, so I take the opportunity to try to get some rest after lunch. It’s hard to sleep because I can’t stop thinking about Crawford. When I finally manage to catch a quick nap, I dream I’m swimming through forests of dark seaweed, unable to see the nightmare creatures I know are hidden there.
I wake up with a start, still gripped by a residual feeling of terror. I fumble for my phone to look at the time. It’s nearly three. Time to leave.
I run downstairs to remind Dad that I’m going to Mamwyn’s.
“Remember to take the lights for the bike, Danni. You’ve got schoolwork to do again tomorrow, so I’d rather you didn’t stay over. I can come and collect you later if you like?”
“It’s okay, Dad. Don’t fuss! I’m sure I’ll be fine.”
I give him a quick grin and go to get my rucksack. I try not to worry about the fact I just lied to Dad. I’ve no intention of coming back tonight. I set out on Michelle’s bike, deliberately leaving the lights in the hall.
Mamwyn wants us to leave
as soon as we can. It’s already gone four and the light will be fading soon. We need to be able to see our surroundings when we get there.
“We have to go carefully, remember. You must stick with me. No going off chasing mackerel, okay?” she says.
“Of course not. Once was enough. I’m not that stupid.”
“The currents are strongest and most dangerous around the Pig Stacks. That’s the outcrop of rocks rising from the seabed where my Joseph’s shipwreck is.”
A thought strikes me.
“Is that what Mum was doing that day? Looking at the wreck?”
“Must have been. It’s the only reason I can think of that she’d have ended up on that beach. Which all goes to show how dangerous it is. She probably got swept into the rocks by the current.”
I think of Mum diving down to the wreck of her father’s boat and shiver.
“Why on earth would she want to go there?”
“The wreck always haunted her. She couldn’t understand why her father went out in the storm, or what he was doing so close to the rocks. I think she goes to look for reasons. But it’s a bleak place and there’s nothing to find.”
I get a sudden flashback to my dream about a chain spiralling in the water. “Mamwyn, can I show you something?”
I fumble round the bottom of my rucksack to find the chain with the crucifix, still stuffed down there since Dr Murphy gave it to me. With everything else going on, I’d totally forgotten about it. I hand it to Mamwyn. She gasps and goes pale. She twists it round in her fingers to see it from every angle. When she looks up at me, I see tears of shock in her eyes.
“Where did you get this?”
“Mum was holding it when she got to the hospital. She was holding it so tight, they had to prise it off her.”
Her voice has gone down to a whisper. “It’s my Joseph’s.”
“Are you sure?”
“Certain. He always wore it after he got involved with Crawford. When he became one of them.”
“One of what?”
“The Chosen. Crawford persuaded many people in the village to join him back then. That’s when Joseph started wearing that crucifix.”
I hear the bitterness in her tone, and think back to Mum’s diary.
Mam and Dad were rowing AGAIN last night…
Poor Mamwyn. No wonder she and Joseph were arguing. I take the crucifix back and stare at it.
“He was wearing it the night he was lost,” Mamwyn whispers.
“So maybe she found it in the wreck – before she somehow ended up on the beach.”
For a moment neither of us says anything. I can’t stop thinking about Joseph’s body, trapped down in his fishing boat all those years ago. She probably can’t either.
Mamwyn sighs. “No time to dwell on it now. Best leave it here on the table. It’s getting late and we need to set out. Are you sure you still want to come?”
I don’t bother to answer. I pull back the mat and uncover the flagstone with the iron ring. Mamwyn glances at me and pulls the stone back. “You’re so stubborn. I just hope you’re not sorry when we get there.”
So do I. But of course I don’t tell her that.
chapter 26
“We could be a while,” says Mamwyn, taking a couple of extra candles from the drawer and shoving them into her pocket. “We may need these if the ones in the lanterns go out before we get back.”
She doesn’t need to explain why she thinks we might be a long time. We both know we have to keep searching until we find out where Crawford lives. Once we’ve done that, our plans are a bit hazy. We can’t really decide what to do next until we know if he’s at home or not. Whatever happens, we’re bound to be away from the cave for a few hours.
We head down the dank stone stairs into the darkness. I hold my lantern low so I can see where I’m putting my feet, and try to quell my rising anxiety about what could happen to us when we get to Porthenys. We wind through the narrow tunnels, breathing in the damp, earthy air until we reach the rock in front of the cave entrance. Mamwyn turns back to me.
“No need for all the ceremony this time. Now you’ve been through the changing once, it gets easier.” She disappears from view as she slips behind the boulder into the cave beyond. I take a deep breath, then push my way round the rock to follow her.
“Last chance to change your mind, Danni. Are you sure you want to come? Like I said, it won’t be easy.”
“I’ll be fine.” I try to sound confident, but my legs are wobbling. I look round at the swirling patterns of ochre on the cave walls to distract myself. The whole experience of the changing took on such a dreamlike quality afterwards, I’d almost started wondering if it really happened. Now I’m here again, with the faint smell of burning herbs still lingering in the salt air, and every part of me knows it was real.
Mamwyn takes down the heavy clay bowl.
“I thought you said we didn’t need the ceremony this time?”
“We don’t. But you must always burn the mixture before you set out. I’ll teach you how to make it later. The smoke helps you remember your way home.”
“Do you think Mum forgot to do it?”
“No, she wouldn’t forget something she’s done all her life. But it wouldn’t protect her from strong currents – or from someone like Crawford.” She hesitates for a moment. “Listen, Danni, just in case anything happens to me, I’ve written the recipe down. It’s in the kitchen table drawer if you should need it.”
Her words drive home the terrible reality of the situation. Crawford is ruthless and he hates sea people. He would probably prefer us dead. And we’re about to set off to find him.
I watch Mamwyn pull the herb mixture from her housecoat pocket and arrange it carefully in the bottom of the bowl. I seize the opportunity to ask more questions while I can.
“What is it that makes him hate people like us so much, Mamwyn? I don’t understand. When I went to the chapel with Elliot before I knew about any of this, Mrs Goodwin, the minister, was really nice. Is that because she doesn’t know about sea people?”
“Crawford is one of a kind. We were always welcome at the chapel before he came. But he was different. He said God called him to save the village from evil. In the end it turned out the only thing the village needed saving from was him.”
“But why did anyone listen to him?”
“He had a way with people. And he was a handsome man in his day.”
I think about the Crawford I’ve met. I don’t see it at all.
“I don’t get it. He’s so creepy.” My skin crawls at the thought of him.
“No, I never understood it either, but it’s true. Even my Joseph sided with Crawford against us.”
“But why did Crawford stop you and Mum going to the chapel? You’d think he’d encourage you to go.”
“He said he couldn’t allow us in God’s house until we’d had the devil cast out of us. It was his answer to anything he didn’t really understand. He said it was in the Bible, but I can’t believe that’s true. When poor Joseph drowned, he still wouldn’t let us in. We had to hold his memorial service at the little church outside the village, just so Mary and I could attend.”
She strikes a match and sets the herb mixture alight. It burns brightly for a moment before she pushes at the mix with her fingers to smother the flames. As the fire goes out, thick, pungent smoke rises from the bowl.
I fidget nervously. “So how come—?”
“No more questions now, girl. It’s time we started. Let it go and make yourself ready.”
I try to stop thinking about it but I can’t. As I take the purple dressing gown off again ready for the changing, my mind is reeling with everything she’s just told me. Then the smoke fills my nostrils, and I know I must focus. I need to help Mum and I have to concentrate. The lights start to flash in front of me as Mamwyn hands me my sealskin.
The smell of the skin is immediately familiar. A mix of brine and cave wall. Earth and sea. I push myself into the pelt and the air
crackles around me. The lights dance and spiral together. This time I’m more aware of the pain. The lengthening and fusing of bone, the skin hissing and fizzing as it becomes a part of me. The lights combine into one bright disc right before my eyes, and I am blind to everything else. I reach towards the shining, dancing light.
Toc!
The sound of clacking pebbles is loud in my ears.
I’m on the beach again. I am changed.
We lumber across the stones until we reach the water’s edge. Mamwyn turns to look at me, the darkness of her seal eyes reflecting the evening sky. As the sun sinks briefly below the thick cumulus clouds, for a moment it looks as though the sea has caught fire.
We slide into the water and move quickly from the shallows. From under the waves the sun’s rays filter down, transforming the water into vast cathedrals of light. I glide through the liquid gold, and feel a sudden stab of intense sadness about Mum. Because of what happened to her, she was too afraid to tell me anything about this.
We swim through a shoal of shiny bronze-coloured pollock, eyes shimmering like liquid glass as they turn backwards and forwards in the light. Beyond them the darkness of the deeper water spreads like a vast blanket beneath us. The clicks and calls of other marine life bombard us from all directions. I see shoals of cod, sounding to each other as they swim open-mouthed towards us, then turning away as one when they see us approach.
Suddenly the cod are back again, swimming so fast that they’re gone in an instant. Something bigger must be out there. Fear of the unknown spreads cold fingers up my spine. I swim faster to keep close to Mamwyn. I think she senses my fear, as she immediately turns back towards the shallower water. Soon I can see the seabed again, and I feel safer knowing we’re closer to the shoreline. Brightly coloured cuckoo wrasse scatter into the kelp as we swim overhead.
All at once I feel the current. Mamwyn circles round me to signal the coming danger. Ahead, vast rocks pinnacle up from the seabed, reaching towards the canopy of light above. The rocks are pale flesh colour. Nothing seems to be growing on them, only patches of dark algae like moles on skin. Blood red sea anemones cling in the crevices like boils. I can see why they’re called the Pig Stacks. They look like animal carcasses, piled up in mounds nine or ten metres high. Down in the gloom close to these rocky outcrops, my grandfather’s boat lies rotting on the seabed.