Penny frowned and leaned closer, brushing a kiss across his lips. He captured her and kissed her back, hard, grabbing her face with both hands. Why was he kissing her like this now, like she was oxygen and he was suffocating?
No, she couldn’t really know what she was getting into, could she? Handcuffs were toys. She should be running away from him and his twisted inclinations. Before he accidentally got drunk again, tied her to her coffee table, and fucked her silly.
Damn, that did sound good, though.
He pulled away and let his forehead rest against hers. Her silver-blue eyes were like a river in the moonlight.
“She should’ve listened to you,” Penny said.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, it does. We’ll always listen to each other. You don’t need to be afraid.”
He frowned. “But I am afraid.” He hesitated. “The night of Anka’s party… I’m sorry about all that.”
“Why are you sorry?”
“We should have at least talked about what we did first. We were both drunk, and—”
“I really wasn’t drunk, Nick.” She ran a hand down the side of his face. “I knew what we were doing. I loved every minute of it.”
“I’m not even sure I know exactly what happened.”
“Oh, well then, let me remind you.” To Nick’s wide eyes, Penny rattled off an enthusiastic retelling of the evening’s misadventures.
“Holy shit, I’m sorry, Penny,” he blurted the instant she had finished.
“Why are you sorry? It was basically the hottest thing ever.”
“Getting drunk was stupid of me.”
“I don’t know, we seem to have good luck with it. Don’t dodge the question—why are you sorry?”
“I wanted to protect you from the fucked-up. I didn’t mean to… get like that with you. Ever.”
“Why? We both loved it.”
He just stared at her now. “I don’t want you to ever do anything you don’t want to do.”
“I won’t. We’ll listen to each other, like I said. You don’t need to be afraid.”
“I feel like I learned all this shit from Ashley, and I can’t shake it, and I’m just poisoned forever. And I wanted to protect you from that. From that side of me.” He hesitated. “I love you, Penny. I wanted better for you. That’s why I listened to Cass.”
“Aw, Nick.” She leaned closer, and he pressed his forehead against hers. “I love you too. And I love that you want to protect me. But you have to understand that these days, damsels come armed. And you wouldn’t want me in your party if I were a level one adventurer with no gear. Would you?”
He chuckled. “I want you in my party no matter what. But we’d get you some gear pronto.”
“Well, exactly. And this is my adventure, too, Nick. I have a right to explore the parts of it I want to. Just like you have.”
“I’m not sure I really wanted to explore all of those… regions.”
“That’s the real problem. And we won’t repeat those mistakes. Okay?”
“But how do we—”
“Safe words.”
“What?” His eyes snapped fully open now.
“And limits we talk about ahead of time.”
“You… seem to know a lot about this.”
“God, I have the internet, Nick. And romance novels. And seriously, have you ever even watched anime?”
“No…”
“Do you realize that tentacle-rape porn is a whole sub-genre?”
“What!”
“It’s not my thing, I’m just saying, I’m not a kid. I’m a woman. Let’s forget about all that stuff in the past. And the guilt. Did you like the handcuffs or not?
“Well… yes.”
“Then, let’s go on this encounter together and figure out what we like together. Independent of the bullshit.”
He pulled her tighter against him. “Figure it out on our own?”
“Yes.”
“That… might work. But I mean, but do you really like me…” He stopped, at a loss for words.
“Holding me down and having your way with me?”
He winced. “Yeah.”
“Smacking my ass?”
He winced harder. “Fuck. Yes, that too.”
“Don’t forget collaring me like a dog and making me beg for it.”
“Pen, don’t tease, I—”
“I like it all very, very much, in fact. Want to do it again right now? Want me to meow?”
He burst out laughing. He did, in fact, want to do it again right now. As she’d probably noticed, discussion of those particular activities had gotten him hard again and jabbing impatiently at her hip.
“Think of it like this. It’s just more role-playing, right?”
He blinked. “What?”
“Is there so much difference?” She shrugged. “Kids playing cops and robbers don’t actually want to be cops and robbers. You’re bossy with orcs, why not bossy with me in bed?”
Holy shit. He had never made the connection. They were two separate and distinct parts of his life.
Or maybe they weren’t. He stared at her, speechless.
“It has not escaped my notice that you prefer to control the games, Nick.”
“Nah, it’s not like that, I’m just facilitating their fun.”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “I look forward to you facilitating my ‘fun’ later, dungeon master. I think it’s more the same than you think. It’s just another game.”
“A really bad game.” He shook his head. “Isn’t it disrespectful? I want it, okay, I’ll admit it, but why do I want it?”
She shrugged one shoulder. “Did you feel disrespected when I took control?”
“Hell no.” He felt… important, almost worshipped.
“I felt like I could lose myself. Like I could finally relax. I could admit how damn much I wanted you when you told me to, but not before. I’m supposed to be this good little girl. And I can throw off those expectations and be someone else. Just go crazy with what you do to me. It’s exciting. But also safe. I know I’m safe with you.”
He gathered her close and squeezed her against him. “Have I told you how amazing you are?”
“Yes.”
“Well, you’re even more amazing than I knew.”
“No.”
“Yes. You are.” She opened her mouth as if to disagree again. He pressed a finger to her lips, eyes twinkling. “No arguing that, Penny.”
“Oooh, hello again, Mr. Markov.” She gave his finger a nibble. “What can I do for you today? You’re starting to use that voice on me, so whatever you say, as long as you—”
His fingers still against her soft cheek, he leaned forward and pressed a firm kiss against her lips, quieting her. Then he took a deep breath, both to steady himself and to take her in.
He searched her face. How was it possible? What would Ashley think if she knew that her “puppies and rainbows” friend actually wanted him to hold her down and fuck her senseless? And who knew what else. The idea and the image it evoked kicked his craving into high gear—just as Penny opened her mouth and sucked his finger inside. He groaned, hazy images of thrusting his dick into her mouth resurfacing. He snatched his finger back. If she wanted him in charge, he’d give it to her, but this was not that. “You are a kinky woman, Ms. Collins.”
“I’d never deny it. Can we please have sex again?” She grinned wickedly at him and lowered her voice, husky and timid now. “Please?”
The bare whisper drove him wild with desire. “When I say so, and not before. Which just coincidentally happens to be right fucking now.”
As he pushed her back and rose up over her, he let his tongue play across her skin, remembering her every curve, cherishing every soft gasp.
Who would have thought? He had had a chance. Penny wanted him, family and all else be damned.
She wanted him, darkness and all. She had her own darkness, and she wasn’t afraid. And yet, with her, it hadn’t seemed so dark.<
br />
With her, the moon was rising.
Epilogue
Penny had just dozed off for the second time during her CPA practice exam when her phone vibrated.
“What is it, Mom? This isn’t a good time.” She yawned into the receiver.
“Everything okay, honey?”
“Yep, everything’s fine. What is it?”
“Oh, I just wanted you to thank your boyfriend for sending over those pictures. Andrew was delighted. He hadn’t thought to commemorate the event. He even ordered pizza for the office tomorrow. Not that I’m going to eat it, but…”
Penny blinked the sleep from her eyes. Was she dreaming? “Oh, I’m sure you could treat yourself to just one piece.”
“You haven’t seen all the junk I’ve been eating. And I barely leave my desk. But anyway, I just wanted to say I’m so happy you found a nice boy you’re happy with. I’m just so happy to see you happy.”
“Wow. Thanks, Mom.”
“Why do you sound so surprised?”
“Guess I just wasn’t expecting that.”
“Everything all right?”
“Yes, yes. It is now, Mom. Thanks for calling. I’ll tell Nick you liked them.”
“And tell him Andrew liked them. They’re special to him. You know, practical arts like ours are important, but Andy will take pride in that photo for a long, long time.”
She smiled. “I’ll tell him. Good night, Mama.”
“Good night, dear.”
Nick wandered in, setting down his camera bag at his new desk across from hers. “Who was that?”
“My mom. Wanted to let you know her boss Andrew loved those pictures of their anniversary party.”
“Oh. Cool.”
He didn’t know the rarity of that praise; he’d probably heard the value of photos a million times. She eyed him as he put his things away, relishing the way his tall form moved through her apartment. Their apartment now. “Did Regina get back to you yet?”
“Yeah, she wants three more covers. We might do a whole twenty or thirty photos this time. She loved the last two. You up for painting them?”
“Would I let you down, darling?”
“Are you just trying to get out of studying for the exam?”
“Maybe.” She grinned.
“Well, because I’m sure you’ll do fine and you’ve probably already studied enough anyway, I’ll say no, you’d never let me down.” He strode over and kissed the top of her head. “But Regina’s got two friends beating down my door for their own shoots. So you better get busy.”
“Yes, sir, Mr. Markov.” And she turned back to her computer with a wink.
Afterword
Hope you enjoyed Bad Game. I’d love if you’d leave a review at your favorite retailer.
If you haven’t already, check out the first book in the series, Good Game. It’s got PC gaming, physics doctorates, and a pretend relationship—fun!
For news on upcoming Leveling Up in Love romances, including Ashley’s and Olivia’s stories, sign up for my newsletter here!
And you’ll also get Penny’s recipe for dark chocolate raspberry brownies.
Happy reading!
Bad Game: A Geeky New Adult Romance (Leveling Up In Love Book 2) Page 15