Emma closed her eyes and leaned her head back. She sighed deeply and shook her head. “No, I’m no longer in love with him, but I’ll always care about him. I think I was more in love with the idea of being in love, than actually being in love with the man. You know?”
Kevin nodded at Emma because he truly did understand.
“I mean, at one point, I definitely was in love with him. But after he started to become distant and I started to question myself and our relationship, I think that’s when I started to love the idea more than the man. He treated me like crap and I still pretended that it was ok. It wasn’t ok. Never again will I let a man take advantage of my love like that. That’s a promise.”
“Good, because you deserve more than that Emma.”
“Yeah, I know. But I just wish I knew who I was supposed to be with. If not Kevin, then who? I really wish God would send me a sign. This love stuff just isn’t for me I guess.”
“What’s meant to be, will be. Always remember that Em.” For some reason he became protective of Emma at the moment. Seeing her hurt, did something to him that he didn’t quite understand. When he’d seen Jessica cry he felt bad, but it was more pity than empathy. With Emma, he felt a surge of protectiveness that engulfed him, wishing he could punch Kevin’s jaw. He knew that she would be leaving soon and he needed to remember what he had with her. Instead of showing her his empathy with his eyes, he showed her with his body. Tonight, it would be different. It would be a goodbye. And they both took each other to new heights. A vacation neither of them would forget.
Emma woke up in the morning before Zack and snuck out of bed. Leaving a note behind her saying, “Thank you for everything Zack. You made this the best vacation I’ve ever had. Waking you up and saying goodbye would’ve been too hard to do. Love Emma” she rushed to put on her clothes and get to her hotel. Somehow she didn’t look too bad considering the amount of sex they’d had last night, but if she didn’t make it back to the hotel in thirty minutes, and get out of there within an hour she’d miss her flight which was leaving in three hours.
Emma made her flight and looked out at the runway which was sitting beside the beautiful Pacific Ocean. She held her breath as the plane began to speed down the runway and as the plane lifted off of the ground, Emma shed a tear.
Zack woke up and felt around for Emma’s body. When he felt her side was cool, he opened his eyes immediately and realized she was gone. He felt a sense of loss when he saw her clothes and belongings were no longer in his room. He sat up in bed and stretched, trying to understand why she wouldn’t say goodbye to him. He felt like she’d just disappeared without a trace. He didn’t even know where she lived. He just knew she was a mediator and that her last name was Sanget. Pulling back the sheets he heard of piece of paper crumple. Looking back to where the sound came from, he saw there was a note under the sheets and by the pillow that she laid on last night.
When Zack read it, he couldn’t understand why he didn’t want it to end. He felt the urgency to go after her. But in his head, his own words replayed. “What’s meant to be, will be.” Yeah, he understood that, he even agreed with it, but something told him that women like Emma didn’t come around often. He intended on finding her again when he arrived back in the states after his business in Hawaii was completed. There was no way he was going to let a good woman like Emma Sanget go without even trying.
Chapter Twenty-Four
As the next few weeks passed, Emma dealt with being back at the office and pretending like everything was perfectly fine at work with Samantha. Sometimes it’d be too hard and she’d have to isolate herself for a little bit and send up a prayer that God would give her the strength to deal with this woman. As badly as she wanted to fire Samantha, she kept in her little secret hoping that karma would really visit her before she had to. The times when she felt really low, she would think back to her times with Zack. The way that he would hold her and adore her body. In her head she kept hearing, “What’s meant to be, will be.”
Zack dealt with deals and going from hotel to hotel for the last few weeks and was ready to get home. His dad’s words no longer held the same meaning because he was doing a damn good job at building assets to the family’s franchise. He had every intention of sleeping in for a good three days when he got back home, but something stirred in him and reminded him that he hadn’t had sex since he’d been with Emma. Emma…his mind drifted off to the place that remembered her body next to his. He would gladly be going home in a few hours and after he got his days’ rest, he’d set off to find Emma Sanget. It was a promise he intended to keep to himself.
Samantha hated that Emma seemed so damn cheery. She’d play along with Emma wishing that somehow she’d be able to crush her spirit just a little or even catch a glimpse of Emma hurting. But there never seemed to come a time when Emma would show weakness or pain. It was like Kevin never happened. How was it so easy for her to get over the man that she claimed to be in love with? It made no damn sense to her! Every time that she would go home, she felt like she didn’t want to be there with Kevin. She would always be suspicious every single time his phone rang or buzzed. She didn’t care that he was hers.
But for how long? How long would that last? Until Kevin decided he was going to do the same thing he did to Emma to her. There were nights when she wondered why she did it but then she remembered how Emma had hurt her all that time ago and refused to let Kevin go until Emma cried like she did that night. Eventually she was going to tell Emma everything, and she was going to do it when it would hurt her the most.
Emma began to feel pains in her stomach when she went to sleep at night. She thought it was just her period coming, but it’d been late. Thinking back, she actually couldn’t remember the last time she’d gotten her period. Lying on her side on her bed, Emma rubbed her stomach unconsciously. She kept thinking and realized she got it the week before she found out about her Kevin’s infidelities.
Something in her got her feeling nauseous and Emma ran to the bathroom to throw up. Holding her stomach still Emma shook her head at the fear that started to consume her. Emma realized she might be pregnant.
Looking through her bathroom cabinets and any little places that she would hide pregnancy tests, Emma remembered that she had went to a fundraiser a few months ago that handed out Clearblue and First Response pregnancy tests samples. She searched for the pocket book that she had used that day and found the tests in the back. Taking a deep breath she ran to drink some water to help her pee faster and went to sit on the toilet to take the test.
Three minutes later…
After she waited and walked around her place a couple of times, Emma ran back to the bathroom when she saw that four minutes had passed. She closed her eyes and walked over to the sink where both tests sat face up. She covered her mouth when she saw that the sticks confirmed what she feared might be true.
But how could this be possible? Then she remembered that there were times when she and Zack would get so caught up in the moment that they started sometimes without a condom and even once the condom popped. She truly didn’t think anything of the incidents but now she saw that there was a true side effect.
Emma was single and pregnant.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Zack rested for the next couple of days after he got back to his house in New Jersey. He stretched and saw that his emails were piled up and he had about twenty missed calls, but he did not care. He felt relaxed and he decided that today, he could go into work.
He got up and got dressed, preparing for a long day ahead that started at nine. He had around thirty minutes to spare to get breakfast from the deli and a Frappuccino from Starbucks. He drove like a madman and made it just in time for opening. He saw the manager of the store, Steve, opening up the shop for him.
They shared a brief update on each other’s lives and then went to work because they knew customers would be coming in soon and they had to be prepared. The other workers and mechanics at the shop stopped in his off
ice when they got in to see how he’d been while he was gone for the last month and a half. His dad had filled in for him and checked on the shop while he was away and he had left an extensive write up about what they’d done over that time period. But something tugged at him in his body to look for Emma first. He knew he wouldn’t be able to concentrate on work if he didn’t at least know where she resided and he was feeling as if he needed to.
Zack googled, “Emma Sanget – mediator” and immediately her picture popped up as one of the top mediators in New York. She worked in New York City on West 35th street. She was close to all the hustle and bustle of the New York tourists and workers. That must be nice, but it also seems chaotic.
Zack always loved the city but he also enjoyed being able to rest in a quiet neighborhood. He wondered if she lived in the city as well or if she stayed in one of the boroughs. Or could she possibly live in Jersey as well? His mind raced with thoughts and he decided to call in and surprise her.
Dialing in the number that appeared on the screen, Samantha answered the phone, “Emma Sanget’s mediation. This is Samantha speaking, how may I help you?”
Zack cringed at the voice of the bitch who had hurt Emma so deeply, but he put that aside and talked to Samantha as a business man. “Good morning Samantha, I would like to schedule an appointment to get Miss Sanget’s opinion on what I should do about my family’s franchise.” He wasn’t lying completely, they did have a family business/franchise.
“Very well Sir, her next opening will only be able to be about thirty minutes tomorrow, at twelve. All other inquiries lasting longer than that will be available in about two weeks.”
Zack nodded, “Twelve is fine.”
“Good, may I have your name?”
“Gregory More.”
“Thank you Mr. More. Please arrive at least fifteen minutes before the scheduled time so that you’re able to fill out paper work. See you here tomorrow.”
After Zack hung up he put his hands behind his head, leaned back, and smiled. Five weeks had been way too long since he’d had a dose of Emma. Tomorrow, he intended on getting his fill and also telling her what he really wanted from her. Especially now that he knew they lived so close, he intended to try and see what was really going on between them.
Emma woke up and told Hank that she’d be late to work because she had a doctor’s appointment. Hank as usual was concerned but understanding, but this time Emma decided to keep her secret to herself. She took a quick shower and ate a little muffin because the queasiness from the nerves and the pregnancy were starting to kick in.
When she arrived at the doctors, she stayed in the car in the parking lot for a couple of minutes resting her head on the steering wheel. She knew that it had to be Zack’s baby, but the doctor would have to confirm that by telling her how far along she was in the pregnancy. Taking a deep breath, Emma got out of the car.
After her checkup was completed, Emma waited on the treatment table and played around with her phone in her hand. She heard her doctor’s heels walking towards her room and held her breath. There was a quick knock and then Dr. McKnight opened the door with the manila folder in her hand that held her results.
“You are indeed pregnant Miss Sanget. Congratulations. You are a couple days over five weeks along in your pregnancy. You have an option of seeing the baby through a transvaginal ultrasound, or you could wait for a week and then have a transabdominal ultrasound. Transvaginal is a little uncomfortable, just warning you. But next week you’ll be able to see what looks almost like a bean and a heartbeat. So it’s up to you.”
“I think I’ll wait until I can use the abdominal ultrasound. Haven’t had something up there in a while, and I’d rather the first thing not be a stick with a camera.”
Dr. McKnight laughed with Emma and nodded her head. “Definitely understood. So I’ll see you next week. Remember to follow all of the suggestions and rules of this pregnancy that I talked to you about earlier. Here. I have pamphlets and other sites you can look on for any more information. Prenatal vitamins are definitely essential, especially because you’ve still been having caffeine when you didn’t know you were pregnant so let’s get you back on track.”
Emma smiled back at her doctor and nodded her way through the rest of the conversation. Driving to the office was something she didn’t want to do. She didn’t know if she could pull off acting nonchalant around everyone today. She wasn’t even sure if she could speak about what was happening inside of her right now. A baby? She wasn’t even ready for one. She promised she’d never have a child until she was married to a man that she loved. Yes, she truly did enjoy the passion she felt with Zack, but what if it was purely sexual? And she didn’t even know where he lived, what his family was like, nothing! They barely knew anything about each other.
Hank watched as Emma walked into the office like a zombie. Not wanting to question her, he allowed her to go through the motions of the day. He learned that Emma was one who would tell you what was wrong when the time was right. He knew right now the time wasn’t right and instead just told her that she could take it slow and if she needed him he’d be there.
Samantha could sense that there was something wrong with Emma as soon as she walked in. Emma didn’t even give Samantha a second glance as she waved good morning. Instead she just walked past. Samantha took the opportunity to try and finally see if she could find a weakness in Emma and walked into her office with the paper filled with appointments and phone calls. This week hadn’t been too busy since she’d gotten back because Hank was helping out, but she was sure that Emma wouldn’t mind talking to her like she used to. Samantha knocked on the door and heard the faint “Come in” from Emma’s tired voice. Samantha opened the door and walked over to Emma’s desk.
“Yes Samantha?” Emma asked.
Samantha immediately could feel something was wrong. “Here’s your appointment. You only have one tomorrow, I tried to keep it light like I was supposed to until next week. You also have a few phone calls…”
“Anything else?” Emma asked with no emotion.
“Is everything ok Miss Sanget? You seem a little out of it.”
“Yes, I’m fine. Just feeling a little sick, that’s all. But if that’s all there is, I’d like to be left alone for the rest of the day unless it’s urgent. Thank you.” With that Emma turned back to her computer and placed on her headphones.
Samantha gaped at Emma, never experiencing the standoffish side of her before. She walked out confused as ever.
Chapter Twenty-Six
When Emma got home, she turned on the bath water and walked around looking for books to read while she was in the Jacuzzi tub. Coming up with nothing, she got her E-Reader and looked at “Mommy to be” books. Sitting on the side of the tub, waiting until it filled up, Emma read a couple parts of the books. Tearing up, she realized how beautiful the process of building a life inside of her would be, regardless of if she would do it alone or not.
She had enough funds to handle the baby on her own because of investments and she was actually a partner in the mediation firm as well. But there was nothing that compared to having the love of a man next to her to help her through this process. Emma sighed at the loneliness that crept up over her.
When the water filled up, Emma sank into the warmth of the water and put the jets on low, another rule she learned about in the pamphlets. Closing her eyes and allowing the feeling to consume her, Emma began to tear up. Maybe it was the pregnancy hormones that made her so emotional lately, but she teared up because she knew that she was going to become a mother. A position that she never thought she’d be worthy of after all she’d been through in her life. A position that she thought she would never make it to. She was scared shitless to say the least. But she prayed while she was in the bathtub for guidance.
She placed a hand on her stomach and smiled tears of joy for the first time since she’d found out about her pregnancy. Her child. Her baby. Her choice. She chose to keep this baby, not because it was
the right thing to do. She chose to keep this baby because she finally had a chance at giving someone else life, and loving someone like she’d wished she’d been loved all of her life. With no family around, just her friends, Emma knew what it was like to desire a family. Placing a kiss to her hands and placing it towards her child in her abdomen, she whispered a vow to her unborn child. “I promise, Mommy won’t leave you until God takes me home. It’s you and me against the world my love.” Leaning her head back and humming a lullaby she repeated, “It’s us against the world.”
Emma went to sleep with such joy that night. Embracing motherhood and taking it a day at a time was all she could do. Being a single parent would be fine, and she had to make no explanation about who the father was either. She wouldn’t even give the amount of weeks she was along until she felt like she was showing. Emma couldn’t help but smile at the idea.
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