by Carr, Mari
“Someone’s at the door.”
She nodded, trying to decide if she gave a shit. The knocking stopped for a moment, then resumed, with Katie’s voice calling out, “Mom?”
Laura pushed on Bryan’s shoulders as they sat up together. “My daughter, Katie. I invited her to watch the red carpet with me, but she turned me down.”
Bryan grinned. “Looks like she changed her mind. We were almost busted. Making out on the couch.”
She laughed quietly, though her heart raced painfully—from unrequited desire and nervousness. What would Katie say when she found Laura here with a man?
She stood up slowly, finger-combing her hair. “Give me a minute, Katie,” she called out.
“You look fine, Laura. Lose the guilty expression and she’ll never know anything happened.”
Laura rolled her eyes. “Were you always this big a smart ass?”
Bryan nodded. “Yep. And don’t play holier than thou with me. I know you too well. You used to give me a run for my money in sarcasm.”
Laura started to protest, then realized he was right. “Shit. I did.”
Bryan rose from the couch and grabbed his coat.
“Where are you going?”
“Home. Spend the day with your daughter. I’ll call you tonight.”
Laura frowned, unhappy with his hasty departure. “You don’t want to talk about what just happened?”
He chuckled. “I sort of thought the kiss said it all. You’re sexy and hot and I want to fuck the hell out of you. Any other questions?”
She shook her head slowly. “Nope. That clears it up.”
They walked down the hallway to the front door. Before she opened it, Laura turned to face Bryan. “Just for the record, I feel the same way.”
Bryan groaned softly. She grinned, and then opened the door.
Katie’s face registered shock when she saw Bryan standing there, but she recovered quickly as Laura introduced them, explaining that Bryan was the old friend from high school she’d mentioned before, with the daughter who was a musician.
Katie shook his hand. “Nice to meet you.”
“You too,” Bryan said. “I came by to drop off a CD for you from my daughter, Trina. Your mom said you’re a fan of alternative music.”
“I am. Thanks. I can’t wait to listen to it.”
“Well, I’m off. You girls enjoy your party.”
Bryan waved and left, as Laura and Katie went inside.
“I thought you were too busy,” Laura said as they plopped down on the couch.
Katie picked up a bowl of chips as her gaze ran over all the food selections. “I finished up early. Damn, Mom. This is a feast. Why didn’t you tell me you made all this food?”
Laura shrugged, though she was pleased by Katie’s casual tone. For the first time in a long time, Katie sounded like herself. It gave Laura hope. “I didn’t want to put pressure on you since you had work to do.”
“This all looks delicious. Was Bryan going to stay? Did I run him off?”
Laura sensed her daughter was studying her face, so she took care to school her features. “No. He just dropped off the CD and then we chatted for a little while. Reminisced about our high school days.”
“Did the two of you used to date?”
Laura shook her head, wondering what her daughter would say if Laura started going out with Bryan now. God knew she was tempted to take him up on that offer to fuck the hell out of each other. “We were just friends. Never anything romantic.”
“Was he that hot back in high school?”
Laura laughed. “He was cute, in a young boy way. He’s definitely gotten better looking over the years.”
Katie fell silent. Laura feared she’d pushed the conversation too far. “You just missed Meryl Streep on the red carpet.”
“Damn, how did she look?” Katie said, tucking her feet beneath her on the couch, making herself comfortable.
Katie had only started hanging out at Laura’s townhouse since the holidays, forced—probably by Kevin—to participate in the Boxing Day breakfast and gift exchange Laura had planned. Juggling the holidays had been tricky this year thanks to the divorce.
She’d given Mason Christmas Eve with the kids. Then Katie and Kevin had split Christmas Day attending get-togethers at both of their grandmother’s houses, so Laura had gotten to see them briefly on that day, but her mother’s house had been overflowing with aunts, uncles and cousins. Laura had counted no fewer than twelve children under the age of ten. The chaos of the large family get-together hadn’t given her much time to talk to her own kids.
So that had left Laura with December twenty-sixth to open presents with Kevin and Katie. It had been a nice day, low key and relaxed. It had also been the first time Katie had spent any real time at Laura’s house. Since then, her daughter had started dropping by a bit more, joining her for dinner a couple times.
The afternoon turned to evening as they watched the parade of stars, sharing comments about the dresses the actresses wore, laughing at the tacky powder-blue tux a comedian had chosen to sport, and eating way too much. It was like old times.
Several times, Laura allowed her mind to drift back to Bryan’s kisses. When they’d been in the heat of the moment, she’d been swept away by the sensations and ready to invite him to stick around for more.
Thank God Katie had shown up. If there was one thing Laura knew for sure, it was that she wasn’t looking for a serious relationship. Companionship, friendship, a little harmless flirting and kissing with Bryan were all well and good. Anything beyond that and Laura could be in trouble.
Big trouble.
Because a large part of her wanted more.
A lot more.
Chapter Three
Laura Sanders
Did you know in kickboxing in the United States, you’re only allowed to strike with your fists and feet? Isn’t that enough? Ouch.
Bryan put his fork down and leaned back. After another brief one-week stint out of town for work, he had called and invited her out to dinner. “That was delicious. I’m glad you recommended this place.”
She took a sip of her wine. “I love the food here, plus it’s quiet. I’m not sure why people like those sports-themed restaurants so much. The ones with TVs on every available flat surface.”
“I agree. I always leave those places feeling like I’m on system overload from too much stimulation. Flashing lights and loud noise. Drives me nuts.”
She agreed, then laughed, rolling her eyes. “Uh oh.”
Bryan understood her humor. “Yeah. I know. Remind me again, when did we get old?”
“I can’t speak for you, but I stopped being hip around nineteen when I got married and pregnant way too young.”
“I have to admit you seem to have held on to your coolness better than me if the clubbing and red-carpet feasts are anything to go by.”
Laura set her wineglass down and shook her head. “Oh, hell no. You’re just joining in after the second-chance goal. You should have seen me last year. The only things I was missing were the reading glasses on a chain around my neck and orthopedic shoes.”
“Second-chance goal?”
Laura put her fork and knife on her plate as the waiter came to clear it away. “On New Year’s Eve, the wine girls and I decided to make some resolutions. Mine was to get my groove back.”
“Who are the wine girls?”
Laura grinned. Zoey’s Rob had started calling them that and they’d embraced the name. “I do a Thursday night happy hour with five girlfriends. We meet at my place, consume a few bottles of wine, unwind, relax, gossip, bitch. You know, girl stuff.”
Bryan nodded. “I see. So you and the wine girls set goals for the year and that’s why you were clubbing at Blue Moon?”
“Yep. That was just a small part of my grand scheme to get my shit together. It seems I was interpreting forty-three as being the equivalent of sixty-three with one foot in the grave.”
Bryan lifted the wine bottle
and topped up both of their glasses. “It makes sense, though lately I feel like I’m regressing. I used to feel so much older, but nowadays, it’s like I’m in my early thirties again. I give Trina credit for that. She’s been really sweet about visiting or inviting me along to watch the band perform. I’m surrounded by college kids these days. I’m learning new lingo and listening to popular music. And as much as it pains me to admit this, I never miss an episode of Project Runway. Trina and I watch it together. She and two of her band mates actually helped me dress for this date tonight.”
Laura laughed. “Really? Because they did a great job. You look totally hot.” He was wearing a white dress shirt with a royal blue silk tie that pulled out the blue in his eyes and accented his muscular shoulders.
“I’ll let Trina know you approved.”
“Actually, that regression you mentioned is what I’m aiming for.”
Bryan leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table. “So what else does this master plan of yours include along with the clubbing?”
Laura flipped her hair playfully. “New hairstyle.”
He winked. “I like the hair.”
“And more fashionable clothes.”
Bryan teasingly ogled her breasts, displayed by her low-cut top. “Definitely approve of the clothing.”
“Dirty bastard. Let’s see. In addition to the dancing and staying out late, I’m supposed to go to a concert, throw some theme dinner parties and smoke pot. Oh, and I already joined Facebook.”
“Not bad. It’s only mid-March and you’ve made some decent progress. By the way, I’m down on the getting-high-at-a-concert deal if you’re serious about that.” Bryan laughed.
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“That’s quite a resolution.”
She shrugged. “I’m sure it probably all sounds silly.”
“Not at all. I understand wanting to find yourself, Laura.”
“You do?”
Bryan nodded. “After Corinne died, I went into autopilot. Spent two years going to work, taking care of Trina. I made breakfast, packed lunches, cooked dinners. I drove her to piano and voice lessons, helped her with her homework and figured out a way to explain sex and PMS to her without both of us dying of embarrassment.”
Laura grinned. “Oh to be a fly on that wall.”
“Then I woke up one day and thought, Christ, there’s gotta be more to life than this.”
Laura understood that feeling too well. “What did you do?”
“Little things. I don’t think anyone can change his or her life overnight, but I started taking more time for myself. Started reading, watched a ton of porn on the Internet, engaged in a tumultuous, but enlightening, affair with a woman from work, and I took a cooking class.”
Laura leaned back, impressed by his list. It reminded her of the one her friends had helped her generate on New Year’s Eve. “So our lists are similar.”
Bryan chuckled. “Really? You’re into porn?”
She laughed. “No. My computer time is typically limited to Facebook and Pinterest, though I’ll keep porn in mind in case I ever get bored with those time sucks.”
“I’ll hook you up with some good links.”
Laura rolled her eyes. “Thanks. Instead of a cooking class, I’m thinking about taking kickboxing with my friend, Shelly. Of course I suspect the only ass that will get kicked there will be mine.”
“I’d love to see that.”
“I’ve never been much of a reader, but Josie just gave me a pretty racy romance book last week. I keep meaning to start it.”
Bryan took a sip of wine. “You’re off to a really good start on reinventing Laura. You had me fooled.”
“Yeah, well. Thanks. I’m not sure I’ve accomplished much, but I am having fun.”
“Nothing wrong with enjoying life. If I’ve learned anything in my forty-three years, it’s that life is too damn short. Time seemed to last forever when I was a kid. Nowadays I blink and another year has passed.”
They fell silent for a few moments, then Laura asked the question she was dying to have answered. “I have to admit I’m compelled by your tumultuous, but enlightening, affair. What the hell does that mean?”
Bryan didn’t answer immediately.
Laura raised her hand. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry.”
“No. It’s a valid question, but I’m not sure how to respond. I’ve learned some things about myself since Corinne’s death, let parts of my personality that I’d suppressed emerge.”
“What do you mean?”
“Is sex on your list of things you want to explore?”
It was her turn to go quiet. Was it? Josie had insisted it should be on the list, but Laura hadn’t wanted the hassle, the complications that sex would add to her life. Truth was, she hadn’t missed it that much and eliminating it from her life after the divorce had been a blessing.
Until Bryan’s kisses, she hadn’t second-guessed that decision. Since then…she’d thought about sex way too much.
“And now I’m the one asking personal questions. Laura, I didn’t mean—”
“It’s not that I don’t want to answer. The truth is I don’t know if it should be on my list.”
Bryan nodded, but didn’t press her for more.
Regardless, she felt compelled to forge on. “I was with Mason for twenty-three years. By the end of my marriage, we’d fallen into ABC sex.”
He frowned. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard of that.”
Laura grimaced. “Anniversary, Birthday, Christmas.”
“Ouch.”
“Yeah. Well, even on those four big days it was nothing to write home about.”
Bryan leaned closer, grasping her hand. “Describe it.”
Laura tried to ignore how much his touch was affecting her. She’d been drawn to him since she’d seen him in the club. An undeniable sexual attraction was growing between them. But she felt the need to resist the pull for some reason. “You seriously want to hear what sex was like between me and my ex-husband?”
“Only if you’re comfortable talking about it.”
Laura took a long sip of wine. Why not? “We had a fairly standard routine that started with me giving him a blow job, then a bit of missionary. And we always wrapped up with the big ending of him taking me from behind, doggie-style, until he came.”
“That doesn’t sound terrible.”
“Probably not to you. You’re a guy.”
“Wait,” Bryan said. “Until he came? What about you?”
She shrugged. “Sometimes I did, sometimes I didn’t.”
“And that was it?”
She nodded. “That was it.” She looked away, pretending to study the other patrons in the restaurant. Where had all that come from? She hadn’t just dumped all her luggage on Bryan’s lap, she’d slammed the suitcase against his head.
“I like to be in control in the bedroom.”
Bryan’s unexpected admission caught her attention. She looked at him, found his gaze hadn’t left her face. “What does that mean?”
“What would you say if I asked you to excuse yourself to the ladies’ room?”
“Why would I go there?”
“To remove your panties and bring them back to me.”
Laura grinned. “I’d say two things. One, I just got out of a relationship with a man who played lord of the castle and I’m not interested in getting back into that same set-up again. And two, I’m not wearing any panties.”
Bryan chuckled. “What do you mean by lord of the castle?”
She shrugged. “Mason had some rather archaic ideas about the man being in charge of the household. I was nineteen when we got married, too stupid and in love to question that concept. By forty, his controlling ways made me dream about castrating him while he slept.”
Bryan leaned back from the table and crossed his legs.
She laughed. “All I’m saying is I’ve been there, done that. Regardless of my desire to rediscover my lost youth, in
that instance, I’m too old and set in my ways to play doormat for any man. I’m sorry.”
He didn’t reply immediately, but this time, Laura let the silence go.
“Fair enough. Could I entice you into fucking like teenagers in the backseat of my car, then?”
Laura covered her mouth with her hand, trying to hide her grin. She was extremely tempted by his offer, but while she might want to be young again, she didn’t exactly possess the same limber equipment she’d had twenty years ago. “I think I could be lured to participate in some of that.”
Bryan raised his hand to call the waiter over. “Check please.”
Laura laughed. “In a hurry?”
“Are you really not wearing any panties?”
Bryan’s gaze was one of unadulterated lust. Had anyone ever looked at her with such desire? She took the last sip of her wine, suddenly feeling thirsty and nervous and in need of fortification.
Bryan paid the tab, then stood and offered his hand. “Ready to go?”
She nodded and they left the restaurant hand in hand.
The ride back to her townhouse was made in silence as Laura filled every second with one panic attack after another. She hadn’t anticipated the evening going this way. Sure, Bryan had told her he wanted to fuck the hell out of her, but she’d dismissed those words, decided they were said in the heat of the moment.
Bryan had a wicked sense of humor. Laura had thought perhaps they were just indulging in some innocent flirting and dirty sexual innuendos.
Yeah, right. Had she honestly thought they’d have a nice dinner, talk, maybe go dancing, and then she’d offer him a bit more of that red-hot kissing he’d introduced her to without sex entering the equation?
Regardless of their unquestionable, off-the-charts attraction, things were moving too fast. She couldn’t quite wrap her head around what was about to happen.
Bryan pulled into the parking lot adjacent to her building and turned off the car. “Laura—” he started. His tone said it all.
She’d given away her nervousness. He was going to back out and let her off the hook.
Was that what she wanted?
She looked at Bryan’s handsome, concerned face.