“It was just a thought, okay. I wonder how you would feel about adopting. I know in the past you said it wasn’t for you but, things are different now, we’re different.”
“My past is still the same, there’s still that risk,” he replied.
“Okay,” I said with a sigh.
“I’m not ruling it out, Brooke. We just have to think real hard about it.”
I smiled at him. “That’s all I’m asking, just think about it.”
“But that doesn’t answer my question,” he said.
“Ev and I were talking about it one day, she happened to mention that she would be happy to help. I also asked Gloria what the procedure was.”
“I would have preferred if you’d spoken to me first,” he said.
“I know and I’m sorry about that. Before I spoke to you, I wanted to know whether it would even be possible. I’ve only just got my residency and you, well, you know what I mean.”
He smiled at me. “One day you’re going to have to say those words out loud, open that damn box in your head.”
“Not today,” I replied.
“So what did Gloria say?”
“Only that she thought it would be straightforward, especially if it was one of the boys from the home. You already passed security checks, surprisingly, and she would email me some forms. I guess it would take some time and I won’t do anything until we both agree.”
“Okay. I’ll give it some serious thought. We’ll talk about it after the weekend.”
While Robert showered, I thought about what he had said. I knew exactly who Robert was, I didn’t know, nor did I want to know, everything he had done. I had no idea what had exactly happened to Guy Rogers other than he wasn’t around anymore. Was it right to not acknowledge that? Probably not, but I had to trust Robert and that he would do what he needed to, to protect me and his family.
***
It was a cry that had me awake. It was early hours of the morning and I lay still, listening. Gerry might have just cried out in his sleep. I felt Robert stir.
“Was that Gerry?” he asked.
“Yes, he might just be having a dream.”
I reached over to turn on my bedside lamp and as I did, we heard another. Both Robert and I climbed out of bed, he pulled on his shorts and I wrapped a robe around me. Gerry wasn’t crying, he had cried out. Pushing open his bedroom door, he was shaking his head from side to side obviously having a bad dream. Robert sat on the edge of the bed and as he did, Gerry reached for him. Even in sleep he knew he was there. Robert pulled him onto his lap and cradled him. I sat beside them and stroked his hair.
“It’s okay,” I whispered.
Gerry half opened his eyes looking at Robert.
“Dad,” he quietly said.
Robert shot a look at me, his face displayed shock before looking back at Gerry.
“It was just a bad dream buddy,” he said.
“I know. Can I call you dad, just for now?” Gerry asked.
“Of course you can, son. Of course you can.” Robert’s voice cracked and I closed my eyes as tears welled.
Gerry settled in Robert’s arms and no one spoke for a while. When Robert was sure Gerry was asleep again, he lifted him back onto the bed and I covered him over. I leant to kiss him on the forehead before heading back to our room.
We lay in bed side by side with the fingers of one hand laced together.
“Fill in that form, Brooke. I want a meeting set up for Monday,” Robert said.
I turned on my side to look at him.
“Don’t make a decision based on tonight. This is for life, you need to be absolutely sure,” I said, my hand rested on his chest.
“When he said those words, do you know what went through me? That feeling I had the very first time I saw you. I love him, I want him in our lives. I want him to have my name.”
All the time Robert spoke he didn’t look at me. I knew it was a struggle for him to say what he had. It was always a struggle for him to voice his feelings and because of that, I knew he meant every word. When Robert made his mind up about something it happened and it happened quickly. I snuggled into his side, he wrapped an arm around my neck, across my shoulders and held me to him.
“I don’t know how good at this I’m going to be,” he whispered.
I laughed. “I remember you saying those exact words before and look at you now.”
It was a bouncing on the bed that woke us the following morning. With eyes half open I saw Gerry sitting cross-legged at the bottom of the bed.
I smiled. “Come here,” I said.
Lying on top of the covers he snuggled in between Robert and I.
“You’re up early,” I whispered.
“I know. We need curtains in my room,” he loudly whispered back.
“Come on, let’s go get some milk.”
Gerry jumped off the bed and ran upstairs. I headed for the bathroom and even from there I could hear the crash and bang of something hitting the tiled floor. I threw on some clothes and headed for the door.
“We’re going to have to set down some rules.” I heard Robert say.
Laughing, I joined Gerry. He was at the window banging with his little fist. Walking over to see what he was doing I noticed Travis and Harley outside. One of the bikes was standing on the gravel drive and Harley was helping Travis give it a wash down.
“Oh man, look at that,” Gerry said.
“Go get dressed and then you can join them,” I said.
He ran, as quietly as an overexcited nine year could, down the wooden stairs thumping on every tread before leaping from God knows what height. His landing echoed around the house. I made a coffee and took it downstairs, there was no doubt Robert would be fully awake by then. He was sitting on the edge of the bed in his jeans and a shirt, pulling on his socks.
“Rule number one. No jumping from half way up the stairs, he could have broken his leg,” he said.
“Coffee? And welcome to the world of children,” I replied, giving him a brief kiss.
“I’ll be in a frenzy if he breaks a bone,” Robert replied, sipping his coffee.
“Travis has his bike outside washing it. Gerry wants to join them. He’s getting dressed as we speak.”
We walked to the door. “Gerry, come on son, we got a bike to wash too.”
“I can’t find my sneakers,” I heard.
“By the front door,” I called out.
He came rushing out of his room like the whirlwind that he was. He grabbed his sneakers and sat on the bottom step waiting for them to be tied. As Robert did, I pulled on my boots. It was a sunny morning and as Robert and Gerry headed for the open garages, Evelyn came across the drive to stand with me. The air was filled with laughter, it was infectious and it was joyful. Robert pushed his bike out to stand next to Travis’s. Harley and Gerry were talking about how cool they were.
“Dad, can we go for a ride?” Gerry asked Robert.
Evelyn looked at me, Travis looked at Robert. We were all quiet for a moment.
“Dad?” Travis said.
Robert smiled and shrugged his shoulders. Travis smiled back before they hugged, a man hug with a pat on each other’s back.
I looked at Evelyn. “I’ll tell you over a cup of tea.”
“Can we go for a ride, please?” Gerry asked again.
“No darling, it’s too dangerous. You can sit on the bike but that’s all,” I called out.
Gerry sat on the seat, Robert climbed on behind him reaching forward to hold the handlebars. I watched Harley and Travis do the same. I saw the look, I got the meaning and before I could shout, the engines started. A roar drowned out any sound I would have made and with a wink to me, Robert drove the bike down the drive.
“You are so in trouble,” I shouted as I watched them head off but was pleased to see they kept to a slow pace.
“I think a cup of tea is in order and you can tell me what on earth has happened,” Evelyn said.
I stomped back up the st
airs and Evelyn made me a cup of tea. As she slid it towards me I told her. She had a smile so wide and her eyes lit up.
“Oh Brooke. It’s going to be wonderful. Harley and Gerry here, guess I’m going to be busy.”
“We’ll talk about that when it happens. I don’t want you under any more pressure.”
“I’ll love it. You know, those two boys remind me of when I first met Robert and Travis. I know it’s different circumstances but they have the same cheekiness. I can’t wait.”
We listened as the bikes made their way back up the drive and watching from the window I could see the smile on the face of Harley, the same with Gerry. Parking side by side I watched Robert and Travis talk for a moment before climbing off, both picking up a child and placing them on the ground. They looked so natural, their movements had no hesitation, they just acted. For two men that had never been around children, they seemed so comfortable. All four headed to the house and Evelyn and I prepared breakfast, bacon sandwiches with HP Fruity Sauce.
“Did you see us? We went real fast, but it was okay, we didn’t fall off,” Gerry said while running across the room and throwing himself into my arms.
“I saw you and if you had fallen off, believe me, Robert would have been in big trouble,” I replied, glaring at him as he bent his head to kiss my cheek.
I placed Gerry back on the floor and took a seat at the breakfast bar.
“Gerry, stop bouncing and sit,” Evelyn called as she placed plates of food in front of us.
The boys were hyper, talking about the bikes and what they had planned for the day. They wanted to swim, they wanted to head back out to their camp, they wanted to watch a movie, there wasn’t going to be enough hours to cover everything on their list.
“I’m going to live with Travis,” Harley told Gerry.
“Wow, that’s cool,” he replied but I detected a little something in his voice.
While the boys went off to explore the woods, I headed for the home office. Opening my emails, I found the forms that Gloria had sent and printed them off. Evelyn and I went through the questions. Some were intrusive but they had to be asked and I completed the easiest ones, thinking about my answers on the others. We only saw the boys once the whole day. They popped back in, dirty and hungry for lunch. It was a quick sandwich before heading back out.
As they got to the front door, I heard Travis say, “Bro, did we really sign up for this? I’m exhausted already.” Robert laughed and they carried on with their adventure.
It was over dinner that night that I noticed Gerry seemed a little off. It was a family meal, all five of us sat around the dinner table and Evelyn had prepared roast beef for us. He seemed a little quieter than usual. I hoped it was just fatigue but I began to think it might be something more. I was of two minds. If we told Gerry about him living with us and it didn’t happen that would devastate him. However, I got the impression from Gloria that he was already in Robert’s care therefore him staying with us wouldn’t be a problem.
Dinner over, Travis, Harley and Evelyn headed to the apartments. I took Gerry down for a shower while Robert looked through the forms I had printed off. I heard him make a call to Gloria as I opened the bedroom door. Peeling off dirty clothes, Gerry stepped into the shower. I laid out his pj’s and his school uniform for the following day. Gary was going to collect him and Harley and take them straight to school.
Robert came into the room as Gerry came out of the bathroom, although wrapped in a towel he dripped water everywhere.
“Hey buddy, you okay?” Robert asked.
“Sure. I’m glad for Harley,” he replied.
I patted the bed next to me and he came and sat. Taking part of the towel I dried his hair. Robert knelt in front of him. He looked at me first and I nodded.
“How would you feel if you lived here?” Robert said.
“What, like for real?” Gerry replied.
“Yeah, for real. Brooke and I have been talking and we want you to stay with us. However, there are some things we have to do, to make that happen. It might be that you go back to the home for a few days, I’ll know more tomorrow.”
Gerry was silent for a moment or two and then I saw tears roll down his cheek. I put my arm around his shoulder and as he fell into my side he started to cry.
“Hey, it’s not that bad, is it?” Robert said, looking at me in panic.
“I think Gerry is a little overwhelmed at the moment,” I replied.
I felt a nod of his head before he pulled away and wiped his face on the towel. Regardless of how much he liked being with us, it was a big change for him.
“How do you feel, darling?” I asked.
“I, err, can I show something?” he said.
“Why don’t we get your pj’s on first, you don’t want to be running around naked now, do you?” Robert asked.
Gerry laughed, dropped the towel and walked naked to the end of the bed to put on his pj’s. He climbed over the bed to the bedside cabinet and reached for his tin. Sitting cross-legged, he opened it and pulled out a piece of paper.
“You know you said I should write down my wish. If I did, it would come true?” he said.
“Yes, I remember,” I replied.
“Well, it did. Look.”
He handed me his piece of paper and scribbled across were words that brought a lump to my throat and tears to my eyes.
‘I wish Robert was my dad and Brooke was my mom’
Letter from Brooke
Dear Reader,
So what is a happy ending? Robert got his, I got mine, Evelyn got hers too in one way, but did Travis? I think so. You see, not every happy ever after has to involve falling in love with a woman or a man. You can equally fall in love with a child, you can find a lifelong friend and you can accept your past and look forward to your future. Are they not happy ever afters as well?
Gerry never left after that night he showed me his wish. The adoption process was drawn out, it wasn’t as straightforward as we thought but it came through in the end. We had a naming ceremony. Gerry Stone took pride of place, side by side with his best friend Harley at a party thrown in his honour. Robert fussed, got stressed, made a waitress cry for giving the boys champagne but he’s doing well. Being a father suits him.
Sam’s father died and my one regret was that I didn’t get to the funeral. Sam understood, it was the same day as our interview with the adoption panel. He came back with an armful of presents for Gerry and Harley ~ He and Scott are the best uncles they could have.
I still work at Vassago part time and life has been wonderful. There has been no drama, other than the ones caused by two boys. Give Robert a reporter to deal with, no problem; give him a child that has just fallen from a tree and broken his arm, he was a mess.
Did Robert and I ever really find out what this thing, this connection that’s still strong, was? No. Some believe when God makes a soul, He makes it’s mate. Now wouldn’t that be a lovely thing to believe.
For now I want just a peaceful life, loving my husband and my son. No doubt we shall meet again sometime though.
Brooke xx
Contents
Copyright
About the Author
Acknowledgements
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Letter from Brooke
Table of Contents
Copyright
About the Author
Acknowledgements
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Letter from Brooke
Fallen Angel, Part III Page 26