Placing soft kisses on her face, I try to cut through her haze. “Come back to me, Cupcake. Come on.”
William kneels beside me and takes hold of her hand. His eyes are glued to her face, waiting for her to come around. Finally, her beautiful, blue eyes begin to clear and they stare up at me. When they begin to fill with tears, I tuck her in closer as her body shakes with gut-wrenching sobs. Then I softly run my hand up and down her back and notice that my own hands are trembling.
When her cries quiet down and I hear only sniffles and little hiccups, I gently pull her head away from my chest and lift her chin.
“You okay, Cupcake?”
She nods and burrows her head in my chest once again.
“Hey,” I whisper. “Hey now. You’re okay. I’m here. Your dad is here. You’re safe, baby.”
She lifts her head. “Dad’s here?”
William gives her hand a squeeze. “I’m here, princess.”
Joss sits up and turns to look at him. I can see the indecision on her face. She’s forgiven him, but the hurt is still there. Her eyes are clouded with it, but after a moment, they clear and she leans toward him for a hug. I’m reluctant to let her go though. I need to feel her to know I’m with her, that she’s safe. I don’t fully let go of her as she leans into his embrace. When they release each other, I pull her back against me, lift her up into my arms, and stand.
“Let’s get the fuck out of here.”
I move towards the door, Joss cradled gently in my arms, her head resting in the crook of my neck. At the door, I glance back and realize that William is standing, his eyes glued to the floor. His face is twisted in pain. When my eyes follow his line of sight, I see that he is looking at Bruce’s body.
“Parker,” I call to him.
His eyes stare at Bruce, his voice breaks when he speaks. “He was like a brother. My best friend. Jossalyn’s godfather. I always knew there was a darkness in him, and I prepared for it. I just didn’t truly believe he would ever give in to it.”
Joss takes her head off of my shoulder and looks at her father. “He didn’t give in to it completely, Dad.”
When William looks her way, she continues.
“He created a program to destroy the virus. I think he might have intended to use it all along, after he’d been paid. He gave it to me just before he died, and I loaded it on the laptop.”
William looks down at Bruce one last time before walking toward us. As we exit the building, he pulls out a burner phone.
“Do you have a cleanup crew?” he asks me.
I grunt out the number of an old associate who handles these situations. Then I head straight for my truck even though William has started in another direction, walking towards a black Audi parked four stalls down. When he sees me turn the other way, he changes course and follows me to my vehicle.
“I’d like to take her straight home. You might as well put her in my car.”
“She stays with me,” I growl. No way in hell am I letting anyone take Joss away from me.
I use one hand to open the passenger’s door then gently lower Joss into the seat. After buckling her in, I turn to William. I still can’t bear to let her go, so I hold on to her hand as we talk.
William’s face is stern. “She can decide if she wants to be with you after all of this blows over, Slade. For now, she needs to go home. She needs time to figure things out, to rest and heal.”
My blood starts to boil with anger, but the kindling under it is panic. What if she decides to return to her old life? What if she doesn’t want to stay with me? It only takes me a split second to know that I’ll follow. I’ll go with her wherever she needs to be.
I’m a good six inches taller than William and I’m not above using my height and build to intimidate him. I get right up in his face and stare him down as I speak.
“I am taking her home. Until she decides what she wants to do, where she wants to go, she fucking stays with me. Are we clear?”
I’m surprised to see that I’m not intimidating him at all. He just stands there and searches my face for something. Then he seems to find it, because his face softens minutely and he steps back.
“I’m going to check into a hotel. Call me when she’s up to a visit.” With that, he turns and walks to his car.
I’m forced to let go of Joss’s hand to shut her door and get into the truck. The moment I let go, my insides twist with anxiety, so I jog to the driver’s side and get in. She is curled up in the passenger’s side, facing me. When I’m seated, she shifts and lays her head on my shoulder, causing the tightness inside to slowly recede. Then I pull the truck out onto the road and take us home.
Joss is glued to my side in bed as I slowly sift my hand through the damp curls of her long hair.
When we got back to the bar, I took her up to the shower and we washed away the grime from each other before collapsing in bed naked. Now, the feel of her skin against mine soothes the residual fear from the day’s events.
I called Simon and asked him to spread the word that the bar would be closed for the next couple of days. I don’t want to be separated from her and I don’t want her to have to be surrounded by a bunch of strangers. After a nap, she called her father and they’d had a long talk. She wanted to rest for the night and made plans for him to come by tomorrow.
We’ve been quietly lying in bed, soaking up being safe and together. I have so many things I want to say to her, but I’m not sure if she is ready to talk about it. However, my impatience gets the best of me.
“Baby?”
“Hmm?” She snuggles a little closer, and I give her a good squeeze.
“Baby, look at me.”
I put my finger under her chin and raise it up so she can see my eyes, then continue down the side of her face and over those pretty, pink lips I love to nibble.
“I meant what I said. I love you.”
Her eyes flood with relief. Then her face lights up and a beautiful smile spreads on those lips.
“I love you too, Derek.” But the corners of her mouth suddenly turn down. “I’m sorry that I didn’t trust you. But you can’t keep secrets from me anymore, Derek. If we want this to work, we have to trust each other.”
My heart lifts at her words. “You want to make this work?”
She cocks her head to the side, giving me a look that says, Duh, you idiot.
I muffle a laugh and give her a quick kiss. “No more secrets. But, baby, I’m not proud of my life, and there are things I’d rather not talk about.”
She bites her bottom lip in concentration, and suddenly, I’m incredibly envious of her teeth.
“I want to know everything about you, Derek. However, I’m willing to let you tell me at your own pace. Can we compromise?”
Compromise? I’ve never been one to do anything other than what I want. Yet I know I’m going to agree because I’d do anything for her.
“Sure, I’ll work on learning how to compromise.” I know she can hear the disdain in my voice at that word.
She laughs and leans over to place a kiss on my cheek.
I quickly roll us so that she’s trapped underneath me. “That’s the kind of kiss you give other people, baby. Not the kind of kiss you give the man you love, the man you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. Don’t ever kiss me like that.”
Her eyes are suddenly fixed on mine, and I’m relieved to see them filled with hope.
“The rest of my life?” she asks.
My heart wants to burst at the excitement in her voice. “Of course, Cupcake. I’m not letting you go. You’re going to marry me and make beautiful little babies with blond hair and crystal-blue eyes.”
She gives me a mischievous, little smile. “I am, huh?” Then she raises a single eyebrow. “I don’t get a say in the matter?”
There is no hesitation in my answer, despite knowing that my caveman tactics can get me in trouble. “Nope.” I smack my lips together so that the P pops. “You’re stuck with me. I won’t let anyone e
lse have you.”
She laughs with delight and ruefully shakes her head at me. “All right, caveman. You win. We’ll get married and make little babies with silver eyes and inky-black hair.”
I throw my head back in a full belly laugh and hug her close. My little hellcat.
But then I sober for a minute and look at her in earnest. “I want you to stay with me. Here. But, baby, I’ll go where you go. I’m not going to keep you from your dreams. Anywhere you are. That’s where I’ll be.”
Joss’s eyes fill with tears and I start to panic. Fuck. What did I say wrong? That wasn’t supposed to make her cry. She must see the alarm on my face, because she lays her hands on either cheek and blinks away the moisture.
“They are happy tears, babe. You don’t know how much that means to me. That you would do that for me.” She kisses me softly. “I want to stay here with you. In this cute, little Podunk town, with its sweet people and lovely little church. Most of all, I want to stay with its gruff and grumpy and incredibly sexy bar owner.”
I huff at her. “I’m not grumpy.” Then I latch on to the last part. “Sexy, huh?”
She giggles and nods. She’s so damn cute, and I am so fucking in love with her.
“How about I show you the way a man kisses the woman her loves, the woman he’s going to marry and knock up?”
She lets out a true laugh this time. “If you think you’re up for the challenge, then—”
I shut her up by sealing my mouth over hers and grinding my extremely hard cock into her. I am definitely up for the job.
When I lick her lips, they open for me. We devour each other’s mouths while my hands roam every inch of her body. Then my fingers find her pussy and slide through the drenched opening. I can’t get enough of her. I’ll never get enough of her.
“You’re so wet for me, baby. Is your pussy aching to be filled? Do you want me to fill you with my cock and empty myself inside you?” I love the way she squirms when I talk dirty.
“Derek?”
My mouth is now full of her plump tits, but I manage to respond, “Hmmm?”
“You know I love when you talk dirty.”
I let her nipple go with a pop. “I know you do, baby. I sense a but in that statement.”
“But I need you, so shut the hell up and fuck me.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
My fingers and mouth bring her to two orgasms then I thrust my bursting cock into her warm, wet pussy. Damn. I’ve fucking died and gone to Heaven. I pound into her, lifting us higher and higher and when I know she’s close, I lean down and take her mouth in a deep, all-consuming kiss.
“I love you so much, baby,” I whisper.
At my words, she splinters apart, screaming my name. It’s my favorite sound, and it’s sets me off. The world spins off its axis, and I come harder than I ever have in my life. Once I’ve completely emptied myself into her, I roll to my side, keeping her pressed up against me, staying inside her. Then softly I rub her back until her breathing evens out and I know she’s fallen asleep. I’m completely exhausted, but I can’t stop savoring the moment.
Joss was erased on paper, but she was never gone completely. It’s me—I’m the one who has been erased. She helped me erase Gideon and find Derek Slade.
Two months later
“MAKE SURE YOU’RE taking your prenatal vitamins. Oh, and I also read you should be having protein first thing in the morning, so have Slade boil some eggs for you,” Dad lectures over the phone.
I smile and let him fuss over me. From the moment, Slade and I found out we were pregnant a few weeks ago and told Dad, he’s been obsessively trying to make sure I’m as healthy as can be. Considering that my mother died during childbirth, I smile and enjoy the fact that he wants to make sure I’m taken care of. He was helpless then, so I will do what I can so that he doesn’t feel helpless now.
“I’ll crack the whip on him,” I tease.
He chuckles and wishes me a goodnight before hanging up.
My eyes trail back over to the Christmas tree that’s set up in our bedroom. My first Christmas tree. Derek and I went down to the hardware store the day after Thanksgiving and bought a twelve-foot, artificial, tree, which we spent that whole day decorating. We even picked out a blond-haired angel tree topper in honor of my mom. Somehow, I think she would have loved seeing this tree. It’s hard to believe that, this time next year, we’ll have a little one to share these traditions with.
Speaking of traditions . . . Since neither Derek nor I had typical a childhood and we both missed out on normal Christmases, we decided we’d be those people. The obnoxious ones who go all out. We’ve played nonstop Christmas music at the bar for weeks now—to the point that Delia has made very serious threats about quitting. I made Slade put lights on the outside of the building. Simon and I even decorated the entire inside very festively. And each night, Derek and I have a Christmas movie marathon—tonight is It’s A Wonderful Life, which seems fitting.
We had just started the movie when he received a phone call about a delivery. I paused the movie and called Dad while he ran downstairs.
“Cupcake?” Derek calls from the hallway.
The sound of his voice sends a shiver through me just like always.
Things happen in your life for a reason. For me, being uprooted from my life and forced to be someone else meant that I was able to meet Derek. And even though Kent was a long-time boyfriend, when I look back, it seemed more like a friendship. There wasn’t an ounce of the passion with Kent that Derek and I share. We can hardly be in the same room without feeling the need to touch one another, which sometimes makes work difficult. When Dad told me that Kent is dating one of my friends named Molly from college, I felt as if a weight had been lifted. Molly is a Barbie to Kent the Ken doll.
Pulling myself from my happy thoughts, I climb off the bed and pad over to the door. When I open it, he’s standing there looking like my handsome Wolverine. The little boy from church, who I now know as Mason, asked his hero to grow out his facial hair. Derek refused to let the boy down and has been growing it ever since. My man can wear a beard very well. Perhaps too well. Every time I see him, I have the need to pounce on him like a damn cat in heat.
“I have an early Christmas present downstairs for you,” he grins. Those steely eyes of his twinkle with joy, and my heart patters in my chest.
“Is that so?” I purr as I slide my hands up the front of his chest. Then I stand on my toes and kiss him on the lips. He smells like hot chocolate—another one of our new traditions.
His hands slide down to my ass and give me a squeeze to pull me to him so he can deepen our kiss. He’s hard between us, and I can already feel the moisture forming between my legs.
Then he breaks away from our kiss and growls. “We better get downstairs before I fuck you right here in the hallway, little kitten.”
I giggle at him. “Fine, but my only condition is that you take off your shirt.”
Another growl. God, I love it when he does that.
Without any argument, he peels off his shirt and dazzles me with his sculpted chest. I want to stay and stare all day, but he scoops me into his arms like I’m his bride and bounds down the stairs.
Bride.
Could that be his surprise? Will he ask me “officially” to marry him? I look down at my ring finger and smile. It wasn’t that long ago that I worried I wouldn’t have this finger any longer. Now, I’m worrying about whether or not he’ll put a ring on it.
“Close your eyes,” he instructs when he makes it to the bottom of the stairs.
I close them and feel him stride through the bar to the farthest corner. A big thud hits my chest as realization hits me. When he sets me down on a cold, wooden, no-longer-rickety bench, I burst into tears.
“Shhh, Cupcake. You don’t even know what I have for you yet.”
But I do, and it’s too much.
“Derek,” I whimper.
He scoots in beside me. “Okay. Now open them.”
> My eyes fly open and immediately begin devouring the mahogany-colored masterpiece before me. The same piano he “sold” has been fully restored. This piano was my saving grace. He stole it from me, and now, he’s giving it back to me better than before.
“Oh, it’s perfect,” I laugh through my tears.
The keys have a lid to protect them, and he’s had beautiful words engraved across the top.
Derek loves Joss.
More tears.
“I want you to play me a Christmas song,” he urges.
Smiling, I decide I’ll play Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You.” But when I carefully lift the lid, my heart drops. Sitting on one of the center D ivory keys is a beautiful diamond engagement ring.
“Derek!” I gasp in surprise.
He slides one hand on my thigh and picks up the ring with his other hand. “Joss, I might be a big grump sometimes. And I might not always say the right things, which sometimes pisses you off. But know this: I will always love and protect you, little kitten. I’d follow you to the ends of the Earth if I had to, but lucky for me, you want to be right by my side. It just doesn’t get any more perfect than that,” he says sweetly as he slides my ring on. “Please marry me, baby.”
The piano now forgotten, I scramble into his lap and straddle him. “Yes! A million yesses!”
His lips find mine and we seal our newly made promise with a heat-filled kiss. I can feel how hard he is between my legs, and I know I want him. Now.
“Make love to me right now, Derek,” I pant as I lift up on my knees.
A growl rumbles through his chest as he sets to unbuttoning his jeans and freeing his cock. Then he slides a hand around my ass and stands so quickly with me in his arms that he knocks the bench back with a loud clatter.
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