“Oh, Creator.” Nathaniel ran a hand over his face. “We're doomed.”
Laura let out a choked sob, shoving back from the table. “Not all of us have your name, your reputation, your support,” she sobbed at him. “It's easy for you, Nathaniel. You have a co-Maestro, you have the queen of Jeffro, and you have the reputation of the greatest warrior. Everyone looks up to you. Losing a Tiro just makes you more of a hero. It leaves the rest of us broken.” And with that, she stormed out of the room.
Nathaniel said nothing, but he did slam his fist on the table.
“Of all the irresponsible....”
“Stop,” Desmond said to him sharply. “Stop.”
“What do you mean, stop? We have to find her!” Nathaniel answered.
“Not if she doesn't want to be found,” Desmond said. “When Reynolds left....”
“Desmond, she isn't Reynolds. But she might end up in his clutches, or worse,” Nathaniel said. “She might end up dead.”
“She'll end up dead either way,” Desmond pointed out, and Nathaniel choked.
“Don't talk like that,” he replied. “Just don't. If she wants to walk away, she needs to tell us to our faces. I doubt that she actually does, though. Devon just gets in her head and–”
“Asks her to leave the order?” Desmond replied. “And if Eliza had said the words, would you have not walked away?”
“She would never ask me to do that,” he replied.
“That didn't actually answer the question,” Desmond said. “If she had asked, would you have gone?”
Nathaniel chose not to answer that, closing his eyes. “Sybil,” he said, “can you and Kierry work to see if there are any connections left to Black Caesar? I know he's dead, but clearly, his followers are still alive.”
“I can do that,” Sybil said. “But if you and Desmond go out together in the open looking for Sienna, you will blow the cover of our whole mission.”
Nathaniel couldn't believe that Sybil was even bringing this up.
“My Tiro is missing,” he cried. “She needs multiple medications, she has no protection, and there are two separate groups on this planet alone, who want to capture her. Your mission be damned.”
“Nathaniel, you may not have to answer to the Jurors right now, but I do,” Sybil answered. “We are this close to capturing Reynolds and shutting down this whole operation. Kierry and I have worked for weeks on this, and the future of our order is at stake. You can't just do this. Think it through.”
“How?” Nathaniel was not willing to listen to reason, but Desmond caught his elbow.
“Just think for a moment,” he said calmly.
“Every moment we think, she could be in danger,” Nathaniel answered. “How are we going to do this?”
“Exactly like you are,” Kierry suddenly spoke up. Both their heads swiveled toward the young Tiro.
“What?”
Kierry turned to Sybil who nodded before turning back to them.
“The way you are now, you're fighting. I would think that you are of two different minds,” Kierry said quietly. “So, if you do have to go out together, keep arguing. It makes sense that you are united in finding your Tiro, but for different reasons. Desmond is supposed to want to join Reynolds. Nathaniel is supposed to want to get Sienna to safety and away from Desmond. Can you do that?”
Desmond cleared his throat. “That's not actually a bad plan,” he said. “We can keep up the act in public and not communicate via the bond, except to reach out for Sienna.”
Nathaniel sighed, realizing that it was the best plan of attack.
“Yes,” he said. “We can do that. But first,” he felt the heaviness in his chest lift slightly, “I should apologize to Laura. I didn't mean to scream at her like that. I'm just…I can't lose her, Desmond.”
“You have to be prepared for the possibility that we do,” Desmond answered. “The truth is, I've seen signs like this for a while. I didn't think that she would actually go, but she has said things that made me wonder if she was unhappy.”
“She's not unhappy,” Nathaniel protested. “She thinks we are.”
“Go,” Desmond didn't want to address that. “See if you can speak to Laura without her throwing something at you. I don't think she should come with us, though. If she follows different leads, we will cover more ground.”
“The repercussions for Laura will be heavier,” Sybil said, quietly. “You two are on suspension; the Jurors are not watching what you are doing. But Laura and Devon are on assignment, and he's bolted. There will be a hearing for that, and if the true reasons come out as to why–”
“You are undercover,” Nathaniel said. “The Jurors don't need to know.”
“Maybe they do,” Sybil replied. “It might be a weight off their minds to have some support.”
“I'll talk to her,” Nathaniel said.
Desmond let out a sigh, leaning against the table.
“Are you all right?” Sybil asked cautiously. Questioning a senior Maestro was generally not done, but nothing here was going as planned.
“We survive everything that comes our way,” Desmond answered with a sad smile. “Until we don't.”
“Until we don't,” Sybil answered, placing a hand on Kierry's shoulder. “Come, young one. We have work to do.”
“We should report to Reynolds,” Kierry said. “If he hears about Sienna's disappearance from us, he will think we are still loyal.”
“Good idea,” Sybil said. “Is that all right, Desmond?”
“There's no harm,” Desmond answered. “He'll know either way. Make it believable.”
“Of course,” Sybil winked at him. “I could have been an actor in another life.”
She and Kierry headed to the library, leaving Desmond alone in the kitchen with his thoughts.
Oh, Creator, he thought to himself. He had hoped he would never have to go through this again after Reynolds. If he did, he had hoped he'd be hardened to it. But it was just as painful as the moment he found that Reynolds had walked away. Obviously, the situation was different, but it was the same in a lot of ways.
Even if they found Sienna, he wasn't sure he could go through the rehabilitation again. He wasn't sure he was strong enough to survive, and yet, he knew everyone was counting on him to be the voice of reason.
But reason would not take away the feeling that his heart was going to stop, and his confidence in his ability to continue to serve the order was failing every second.
Chapter 14
“You've had this planned out for a while,” Sienna said when Devon brought them into an abandoned schoolhouse. It was boarded up, but he seemed to know exactly what lock to pick and board to pull.
“Not this, specifically,” he said. “But when we were assigned this quest, I did some pretty intense research to find potential safe houses, in case we needed to run for it.”
“So, wouldn't Laura know where we are going then?” she asked.
“No. I was last minute about it, so I never shared the document with her. I figured if it came to it, we'd be together anyway. But we're not.” He flicked his wrist, illuminating the place.
It was dirty and damp, but it was safe, and there wasn't any evidence that anyone had been inside for weeks, at least. Sienna tried not to wrinkle her nose as she stepped over a dead mouse.
“But just for tonight?”
“Just for tonight,” he said. “Until I can book us passage out of here. I was thinking maybe Taurine?”
“Taurine sounds beautiful,” she echoed, knowing it was a desert planet and a tourist attraction. The main city was where people went for vacation, to get away from the Order, to get away from all that was governed and regulated. It was dangerous, but they were living a different life now, after all. “But where did you get the money?”
“I saved,” he replied. “Quest allowance – literally credits I found on the street. It should get us out and onto a new life. We'll have to work, but….” he smiled. “Work. Get jobs. Can you imagine? Wh
at do you want to be?”
Sienna paused at that. She had never wanted to be anything but a witch, mostly because the opportunity was not presented to her. She thought her choices in life were witch or a half-life, where she watched the witches.
“I…,” she thought for a moment. “Language. A translator, maybe?”
“A translator?” Devon smiled at her and her accent.
“It's just Basic that is hard,” she explained to him. “It's so different.”
“Well, I understand you just fine,” he answered, as he sat down on a clean spot on the floor.
“Are you all right?” Sienna asked. He shrugged with a smile.
“Sure. It's just the first time I've gotten to relax since we've got here.”
She settled down beside him, and he tucked an arm around her. She lay her head on his shoulder. She had imagined this moment many times, and she expected it to feel perfect. Instead, it felt half-empty.
“I miss them,” she said. “I know this is the right path, but it feels…I don't know. I'm used to them being around.”
“I imagine the feeling will fade,” Devon said. “And once everything settles down, we will visit. It will be all right.”
“What about you?” she asked, and he looked at her, confused.
“What about me what?”
“What do you want to be?” she asked. “Since we are embarking on this new adventure?”
“Oh….” He fiddled with the dirt on the ground. “I just want to relax.”
“Relax?” she said in surprise. “That's not like you.”
“It's fine,” he said. “My whole life has been chaos.”
“Devon, why don't you have a career choice?” she asked suspiciously. “You're the one who led us on this adventure. You should have a plan. Unless....”
He grabbed her hands. “It's fine, Sienna. Enjoy the moment.”
“Unless you don't think you have time,” she may have been sheltered, but she was smart. “Devon?”
“None of us know how much time we have,” he answered, which sent chills down her spine. “Can't we just enjoy the night, Sienna? Let's have a picnic. Here,” he reached for their rucksacks, and she knew that she didn't want to talk about it. But her stomach sank in fear as he tore open the food.
She had trusted him and come this far. Was she about to be on her own?
It wasn't exactly the way that she had planned their grand escape. If she was honest with herself as she lay on the cold floor, searching for sleep, she hadn't exactly planned it at all. Devon's plan had sounded wonderful, and she knew it would erase the burden that she felt on her chest as of late. But the night was cold, and she had never been cold without a remedy. She was used to being attached to her Maestros, to them protecting her, taking care of her, and making everything better. The life she had known before them was a life of tubes and hospitals; the life with them was a careful and well-planned strategy.
This made her feel more alone than ever.
She must have fallen asleep because it was somewhere near dawn that she awoke, her eyes flying open to an unfamiliar sound.
She rolled over, her shoulder crunching a bit of rock, and her senses suddenly on alert.
She didn't carry a weapon, and her magic–while powerful–wouldn't last more than a blast or two. If she was with her Maestros, she would have backed up into them, looking for support or instructions.
It took only a nanosecond to feel alone as she looked for the threat.
The threat, as it appeared, was Devon leaning into a corner and emptying the contents of his stomach onto the ground.
“Devon!” she scrambled up, the sleep leaving her quickly as she ran over to him. It didn't disgust her; she had grown up in a hospital. But she was incredibly concerned as she put her hands on his waist to support him as he finished.
“It's all right,” he tried to reassure her as he wiped his mouth. “It's all right.”
“Never in the history of ever has that been something that is all right,” she answered, confused. “What's going on?”
“I….” He crouched down as his legs shook, trying to steady himself. “Just hold on a moment.”
She knew she shouldn't, but she sent a ping into his system, checking the strength of his life force. Devon's life force had been weak since she met him; she was used to it. She knew that his body was raging war within him. However, the ping came back weaker than usual, and she felt differences from it. It was as if the war was more prominent, the broken and malformed blood cells clearer in her mind.
“What do you need?” she asked.
He took a deep breath. “I didn't grab much from the medication supply when we left,” he replied. “Grabbing more than a night's supply would alert Laura to exactly how long I intend to travel before we reached a proper medical base. She's smart like that. I thought I could get through a day or two without them.”
“But you can't,” she filled in the gaps. “I didn't realize you needed them that frequently.”
“Didn't used to,” he gasped, and she realized he was in pain. She eased him down against the wall, trying to think about the best thing to do. She wished that she could fix things for him, but she wasn't that powerful. Unless, she realized, she was.
“If I can resurrect, don't you think I can heal?” she asked him quietly. “Most of the healing magic these days is from trauma, but I'm special. We could try.”
“No!” He was firm on this. “I've seen what happens when you use magic, Sienna, and I don't want you to go through that. We have to figure out another way to do things.”
“It's not like there are multiple options, Devon.”
He paused. “There might be.”
She gave him a sideways glance. “What?” she asked, at last.
He took a deep breath, unsure if she would believe him. “When Laura and I were with Reynolds, he showed us his medical facility. He has rebels from all over the world–the best of the best. It may very well be that he has something that could help us. Both of us.”
“Willingly go to Reynolds?” Sienna asked in horror. “No! We can't do that.”
“Not even if it will save our lives?”
“Devon,” Sienna said in horror, “you told me you weren't considering–”
“I'm not considering his form of magic, or ours, or anyone's,” Devon sputtered. “I just want to be well, Sienna. I just want to live. Don't you want that as well?”
Their eyes met, and she knew that he could see into her soul. They wanted the same things, and she could see that now. He had a lot more courage than she did. She just had to be a little braver, than she was afraid.
“All right,” she said at last, trying to swallow her fear. “Should we go now? Can you make it?”
“I'm worried I won't make it if we don't at least try,” he said. “Can you gather up the things? Are you feeling well?”
“Better than you,” she said, before her head was suddenly invaded.
‘Sienna!’
Her Maestro's cry made her stop. It was instinct to answer, but she knew that she couldn't. If she did, she would give away their position. They had to stop worrying about her. They had to be warriors again, not caretakers. It was for the good of the universe.
‘Sienna, please tell me you're all right.’ Nathaniel's voice was strong, and she closed her eyes, fighting to block it out. ‘Just tell me you're all right,’ he pleaded.
She wanted to, but she would be lying. She was terrified, and she had never known less what was the right choice, than right now.
Eventually, his call stopped, and she was able to continue, picking up their sacks and erasing any evidence that they had been there. She had done this often enough on quests, covering their tracks. It felt wrong now to be going through those motions.
“All right,” she said after a few moments. “No one will know we were here now. I can cast a coverage spell, but–”
“I'll do it,” Devon said, already flicking his wrists. She watched with envy as hi
s magic covered the ground. Despite the fact that he was pale and his eyes were weary, the spell didn't make him look any worse. It didn't rob him of health or attack him from the inside out. He was built to be a witch; he just wasn't built to live.
She wasn't sure exactly what she was built to be, but she had a feeling it wasn't either of those things.
“Let's go,” she said, and Devon gingerly picked up his pack. “Do you know the way? I'm turned around.”
“I do,” he said. “I'm just trying to consider what's best. Should we take the back alleys and have no witnesses if something happens? Or should we be out in the open where we could be spotted, but an attack on us is less likely to happen?”
“Black Caesar,” she said. “You're worried about him.”
“Partially,” he said. “I was also thinking that if I don't make it, if I need help….”
“You have help,” she said, raising her chin. “You have me. It's going to be all right.”
He smiled painfully at her. “That's my girl,” he said. “Come on, then, we should get started.”
He held out his arm, and she took it, gripping for strength and confidence. They were going to make it, because they had no other choice.
Chapter 15
“Nothing,” Nathaniel said, sleepless at dawn as he tried yet again to ping Sienna. He and Desmond had searched what felt like half the planet, just trying to feel any traces of her magic. Normal Tiros could not block out their Maestros as she could. But Sienna was anything but a normal Tiro. It was times like this that they were reminded of just how powerful she was. “I can't keep trying and getting no response. It's–”
“I know,” Desmond had been silent through most of this, and Nathaniel realized that it was more than just Sienna missing that weighed heavily on his mind.
“This isn't like Reynolds,” he said, softly. “This isn't the same.”
“Isn't it?” Desmond said dryly. “I don't even know why we are looking, Nathaniel, if she doesn't want to be found.”
“Desmond, she could be captured! She could be in danger! She could be hurt, or–”
“Tiro,” Desmond met his eyes, “she may be blocking out your words, but you and I would both know if she was hurt or in danger, wouldn't we? We would feel that in the air, feel it as if it was our pain.”
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