by Darren Lewis
“Sorry.” He apologised swinging his stiff legs over the edge of the cot so his knees touched Cerys'. Cerys sat up slowly, her eyes never leaving Blue's.
“Interesting dream I take it?” She asked, her eyes flickering back and forth, searching his. He nodded.
“I assume you had something to do with that?” This time Cerys nodded.
“I figured a little help wouldn't go amiss. Tarvos, Calda and Galatea were always keen to help their former students.” She answered with a sad smile.
“How on earth do you know them?” Cerys held up a finger.
“One thing at a time, Blue. First, breakfast and second we need to get out of here, I promised Rick we'd be gone in two days and we've been here four!” Blue's eyes widened.
“I've slept for four days!”
“Oh yes.”
“And you've watched me for four days?”
“Yes.”
“Who? Well, who took care of me?” Blue glanced down at his clothes for the first time and realised he wasn't wearing the clothes he'd passed out in. Cerys smiled slyly and beckoned Blue forward.
“It was Al.”
* * *
“Thank you.” Blue clasped hands with Rick. The older man smiled and handed Blue a small medallion on a silver chain.
“Something about you, Blue. Not sure what but I figure as you're tied up with her,” Rick said pointing at an offended Cerys, “you might need this more than I.” Blue took the medallion and held it up to catch the early morning light.
“It's a St Christopher medal.” Rick explained, seeing Blue's puzzled expression. “Belonged to my father, the catch is broken but he'll still protect you on the road.” Rick saw Blue hesitate and held up a hand. “No arguing. Just do the thing justice and stay out of trouble.” Blue stayed silent and placed the necklace into his jacket pocket. Cerys stepped forward and nodded at Rick.
“Thanks again, Rick. And please do as I ask?” Cerys' tone became long suffering. Rick grinned mischievously.
“Maybe. No promises. You know I never make those.” And with that he turned and walked back to the gate of the camp.
“What was that all about?” Blue asked as he and Cerys started walking.
“Rick's been travelling for years. He knows the roads, the people and dangers, and perhaps more importantly when and where to hide and when to fight. A man like that is extremely useful.”
Blue and Cerys walked on in silence for a time before Blue had to share his thoughts with this odd young woman.
“Cerys. I'm still not sure about all this. For all I know you're casting some kind of spell and conjuring images of my instructors to confuse me, I mean how would I know the difference?” Blue came to a stop and turned to look back at the camp. “That's real and the farmhouse is real.” Blue shrugged. “But I don't know if what you're showing me is real.” Cerys sighed in frustration but nodded her understanding.
“I can't make you believe, Blue. I promised I would show you what I could of the world as we travelled. Then perhaps you'll come to understand why you're needed.” Blue frowned at Cerys.
“What? That I'm special?” The memories, real or fake, of Calda mortally wounding Blue's mother and then bonding with him as a child played in his mind. “Why does my ability to bond make me special to you? Is it because I represent more of a danger to the Grey? Are you trying to 'win' me to your side?” Blue's face was flushed with anger. Not only did he feel betrayed by the people and dragon he was closest to, now he couldn't shake the sense of manipulation, as if his path was being chosen for him. Cerys's eyes became distant for a short time and even through his frustration, Blue almost sensed words spoken in Cerys's mind as actual spoken words. A few minutes passed and Blue's temper, rather than increase at such an irritating delay, slowly dissipated and a small flicker of guilt arose in speaking to Cerys in such a way.
“Don't worry about it, Blue.” Cerys comforted him, sensing his distress, as her eyes came back into focus.
“Why am I important, Cerys?” His tone verged on pleading. Cerys laid her hands on Blue's shoulders and she stared up into his eyes.
“Firstly, you're something of a rarity in dragon-riders, you have yet to lose your humanity. Secondly, yes, I will tell you. It will be just as difficult to hear as anything you've learned from me and perhaps Calda.” Blue was about to nod eagerly hoping more information would inform him as to whether he was being used with callous or true intentions. Cerys's expression made him freeze however. He saw emotions playing on her face he'd never witnessed. Empathy and instinct allowed Blue to experience a leaden weight in his chest that was somehow hollow also. He gasped slightly and Cerys grabbed Blue's hands.
“You're not the first, Blue. You're not the first dragon-rider we've tried to save.”
* * *
Blue stood in one of the farmhouse's large reception rooms after refusing vociferously he didn't want to spend another night in the dank kitchen with three mass graves just outside.
Alleged graves. He corrected himself and experienced a flash of guilt at the horrid thought that Cerys might be lying.
Blue and Cerys's journey had led them back to the desolate farmhouse. As uncomfortable as the place caused Blue to feel he'd decided he wanted to hear Cerys out before their travels went any further, if they were to travel together at all.
Twilight painted the farmhouse in a sombre shade as they'd approached and Cerys was grumbling to herself.
“I hate twilight. Can't see by it and certainly can't read by it.”
“Can't you read in the night either?” Blue asked, glad for the strange distraction.
“No. I sleep at night, I'm not a bloody vampire, Blue.” Cerys had chastised him before walking off ahead leaving Blue alone in the fading light wondering if staying at the farmhouse again was too much for her.
“Are you ready?” Cerys asked bringing Blue out if his reverie. He grunted in acknowledgement and walked to the bay window and sat waiting for Cerys to do the same. She paced the floor in agitation, flexing her hands into fists over and over again. Blue didn't have to be psychically gifted to recognise the amount of consternation emanating from Cerys. Cerys stopped abruptly with a loud, suffering sigh. She crossed to the large bay window Blue was sat upon, that once looked out upon acres of farmland, and perched on the wide sill.
“No special tricks, no magic, no dream states to divulge information okay?” She said quietly as she stared out the window.
“Okay.”
“You've been smart enough to realise that someone gifted can show you what they want within a vision or dream, not just the reality you seek, and besides,” Cerys paused to chuckle morosely. “I get a bit sick of them myself.” Blue smiled at her honesty.
“So?” He prompted. Cerys turned her shoulders slumped in resignation, sparking a sliver of doubt in his search for answers.
“Just ask me, Blue. Anything you want, then you can decide if I'm telling you the truth.”
“Alright.” Blue took in a deep breath and the many possible queries circled and circled as he let it out. “What is so special about me? My talent?” Full night didn't allow Blue to see Cerys's expression and he lent forward to gauge her reaction by starlight.
“Calda wasn't the first dragon to realise a person can bond with another paired dragon and rider.” Cerys began. “The Grey have worked with dragons and riders dedicated to peace before you and Calda bonded when you were a child.”
“But why would a dragon decide to help the Grey? If a person can bond multiple times so what?” Cerys nodded at Blue's question but enough light caught her face for Blue to see Cerys's eyes filling with tears.
“The first dragon who realised such a feat was possible did as you would think. He took the child back to the Academy and informed them of his suspicions. They were confirmed. The child was…disposed of.” Blue saw the moment the tears fell from Cerys's eyes in the deep blue light. She sniffed and laughed mockingly. “It was the first time the phenomenon was discovered but not the l
ast. This particular dragon had to witness these gifted children being killed for no other reason but to protect the leadership. By the time the dragon and his rider made contact with us the human race had lost too many innocents to this new order.” Cerys's voice had become monotone as she finished the sentence, distancing herself from the horror she spoke of. Cerys stood quickly and went to her pack. With shaking hands, she retrieved a small box. She opened it and tipped whatever was inside into her mouth. As she did this Blue considered her words. It was difficult for him to fathom, just as the imagery of the three graves and Calda's memory had been. He wanted to walk away already, simply place his hands over his ears and turn his back on Cerys and the farmhouse. He was sure with the information he'd discovered about Galatea and Tarvos working with the Grey he'd be welcomed back to the Academy.
Cerys returned to the bay window flashing the small box at Blue.
“Nicotine gum.” She explained. “Can't find any cigarettes anymore.” Blue frowned, ignoring her as his legs were tense, readying him to get up and leave. But one piece of information stopped him.
The dragon and his rider made contact. Blue's thoughts went back to his Ascendency and the unbelievable fate Tarvos had meted out. Further back and Blue saw the head of the Academy looking lost and desolate in his chambers, late at night, speaking to an invisible comrade.
“It was Tarvos wasn't it?” Blue asked, his voice barely a whisper in the deafening silence of the farmhouse.
“Yes.” Cerys whispered back but in a much firmer tone. “Tarvos came to see how warped and paranoid his leader had become. To extinguish what he saw as a potential threat in an infant.” Blue slumped back against the window causing the wood to creak and crack ominously from his weight. “What Tarvos came to realise in time was that his leader was actually right.”
“What? Tarvos thought? No!” Blue was incensed that his former instructor could think such a thing.
“No, Blue. He didn't think it was right, he merely realised his leader was right to be fearful. You see when you bonded with Calda you gifted him, well, your innocence. When a dragon bonded with a baby there are no thoughts or memories to share, only an instinctive need for comfort and sustenance that the dragon would provide. As an older child you fundamentally changed Calda's viewpoint on the human race. Never before had she experienced such purity. You have to remember that Galatea was brought up like you, to be a rider, similarly biased. When Calda changed, Galatea changed as Tarvos had. Can you imagine the threat that opened up? A 'peaceful' revolution was a possibility, led by a human bonded with potentially hundreds of dragons.”
Blue ran a hand through his hair and then over his chin, noting distantly he needed a shave.
“So these children could ultimately change any dragon. Make them see their enemies for actual living beings?” Blue recalled many lessons on the scourge of humanity. How they had squandered this world and its resources for its own pitiable desires and wants. Humans like Blue were the chosen few. To be accepted by a dragon was to be acknowledged by the planet itself as its saviour. “You say I'm not the first.” Blue stated. Cerys shifted her position and shuffled next to Blue. Both could now see the other's expression and in the blue-black light of the room, Blue saw the consternation written plainly on Cerys's.
“Tarvos and Galatea formed a pact to rescue these talented children. For every child found another dragon and rider were brought into the fold. For every child found not only did they run the risk of being discovered or informed on but the death of the child itself. A decision was made to hide the gifted children within the Academy and then for them to be released to the Grey on the day of their Ascension.” Cerys swallowed around the chewing gum and grimaced. “Twenty-year-old gum.” She removed the wad of gum and pressed it firmly to the wall behind her. As her finger squelched into the sticky mass she continued her story. “You're in a perfect position obviously to know the mental stress inflicted on a sixteen-year-old discovering who they are to their own kind and what the world is truly like. To be hunted by those you grew up with and reviled by the rest of humanity.” Cerys prodded the gum with increasing strength. “You're not the first, Blue.” Cerys repeated her earlier statement. “You're not the first.” She turned and drew up close to Blue, close enough for him to see her eyes properly. “I won't bore you with how I became involved with the Grey, suffice to say when this 'opportunity' arose I leapt on it. I wanted to be the one to encourage these twisted minds to see what their kind had inflicted upon the world. That there was no mercy, no justice except for the harsh law of dragon-kind. I and I alone would be the light in the dark for them.” Cerys slapped the palm of her hand against her chest. Blue involuntarily leaned back at the vehemence in Cerys's eyes. “I failed them.” Cerys whispered her face becoming motionless as the tears fell once more. “All but one of my charges committed suicide. Sixteen-year-old boys and girls who expected to be bonding with a dragon were caught up in the desolation of humanities remains. To be told they were the one. They were so important, but the price was to be hated by your fellow riders.” Cerys shrugged and she scoffed at herself. “It was like running the most terrible experiment you can imagine. What shall I tell them? Is it safe to disclose information on the Grey? Shall I begin with the war? Maybe the stories of mass graves in every country around the globe? Your dragon friends are genocidal bastards so will you help us thank you so much!” Cerys drew a calming breath and ran her fingers through her hair hard enough for Blue to hear her nails scraping on her scalp. “I left, after I found the last one with their veins open, I left the Grey, not before expressing my full opinion on waiting until a rider was sixteen to tell them the truth.” She interlocked her fingers behind her neck and blew out a deep breath, her eyes distant, wandering through scenes of horror that Blue could scarcely conceive.
“What became of the one who didn't…” Blue couldn't finish the question.
“He seemed fine. I was so thrilled, so happy that finally I'd broken through all those years of brainwashing.” Cerys barked a laugh, sniffed and moved away from the window and into the darkness of the room. “We rendezvoused with the Grey and the change was so quick, like a lightning strike. You know? It's so powerful, so terrifying and awesome that it captivates you for an instant. He killed two of the Grey, two of my friends before he was…restrained.”
Blue sat unmoving on the window sill. He felt an incredible sadness at the loss of his fellow brothers and sisters. A loss apparently perpetrated by those he trusted and the woman standing in the dark not ten feet away.
“Then they told me about you.” Cerys whispered from the dark. “They said you were different. That your mind was open, gifted in a way we'd never encountered in a dragon rider.”
“What does that mean?” Blue closed his eyes, came to his feet and then forced his lips together as his sadness was replaced by a growing anger.
“The way you saw my memories of the graves. The night you discovered Tarvos speaking to me far away from the Academy. Allowing your dreams to be a conduit for Calda to communicate with you. Everything pointed to you being different. So I agreed to come back.”
“To what?” Blue scoffed. “To 'experiment' on me? Find out which method would keep me from going crazy and the sharp knife out of my wrists?”
Cerys was in front of Blue so quickly it startled him into silence. She grabbed the lapels of his jacket and twisted them around her fists.
“Yes! To keep you alive!” She yelled into his face. “To do the crappy job of telling you your life is complete bullshit, a complete bloody lie!” She shoved Blue backwards. The backs of his thighs caught the window sill and he lost his balance, crashing into the fragile woodwork. Glass shrieked as it shattered and Blue felt Cerys's grip once again as she hauled him away from the broken glass. “I could've turned away. I wanted to. Oh I really wanted to.” Cerys smoothed Blue's jacket and readjusted the front so it was hanging straight. “But I didn't want the burden to fall to another. I wanted this chance no matter how selfish. A c
hance to reach your gifted mind, Blue as I believe you will see the world as it is and not how you're told it is.”
“But all everyone has been doing is telling me how it is.” Blue protested. “For all I know you set me up to meet Rick.”
“Fair enough.” Cerys acknowledged calmly. “That's why I'm asking you to come with me. Give me a chance and see for yourself. Find your own truth, Blue.”
* * *
Stars speckled and glittered in the night sky. A vast range of cloud was visible on the eastern horizon and would soon prevent the beauty of the night a witness.
Blue stood motionless at the rear of the farmhouse staring intently into the heavens seeking an answer. As turbulent as his mind currently was he'd decided to not act as rashly as the others before him had done. He sighed, he knew that was unfair. To be thrown into this world and learn of things that cast your entire life and future into doubt was as terrifying as it was overwhelming. The lack of control over his own fate or destiny was as abhorrent to him as to anyone but Blue suspected something that made him cringe in embarrassment no matter how true he thought it was. To be standing here now after being 'banished' from the Academy, to meeting Cerys, Rick and speaking to Calda, the wealth of information imparted, he realised was quite useless to him at this moment. If Cerys was being truthful and Blue believed she was regarding the deaths of former riders like him then it was that single piece of knowledge that kept him standing here rather than walking away or seeking his own exit from life. He felt the depths of despair his comrades surely experienced. The darkness in front of him was held at bay by the hands of those who'd been consumed by it and he thanked them. For without the knowledge of their fates he would follow the same path rather than the bleak future awaiting him.
Blue still wanted to reject Cerys's words and memories. Reject them completely. He couldn't and wasn't sure why.
It's your gift, Blue.
Blue recognised the voice in an instant. He'd first heard it as a boy when spying on Sir Tarvos just as he fell asleep.