by Seton, Cora
"Have you seen me return any of their attention? At all? I've kept up my side of the bargain. I haven't flirted with anyone. I haven't given them the time of day."
"You sure gave the time of day to Hannah O'Dell. You couldn't keep your hands off of her!"
Jamie stared at her as if she'd lost her mind. "Hannah O'Dell? What the heck are you talking about?"
"I saw you with her – two years ago in your cabin. All over her."
For a minute Jamie couldn't seem to catch up. Finally, he said, "Let me get this straight – you spied on me and Hannah O'Dell? Why the hell would you do that?"
She swung Storm away from him, clicking her teeth, but Jamie headed her off. "Tell me – why would you be at my cabin in the middle of the night?"
"I came…I wanted…" Damn it, she could barely talk for the ache in her throat.
"Jesus, Claire did you come to see me? Two years ago?" Jamie swung down off his horse, ducked around it and reached up for her. Before she could pull away, he'd tugged her down off of Storm. "I was breaking up with her, did you realize that? I was breaking up with her because I hoped you finally wanted to be with me. Then…you never came back. You fell for Ledstrom instead."
The anguish was all too clear in his voice.
"Funny way to break up with her," she finally made herself say, weighed down with the knowledge that she'd been guilty of break-up sex once or twice herself. "It doesn't matter. None of this matters. We can't get married because if we do you'll be sick of me in a matter of days."
"How can you say that?" Jamie gripped her tighter. "I could look at you all day long, every day, and not get tired of you. I have looked at you, listened to you, worked with you all day long and all it's ever done is leave me hungry for more. Nothing matters to me except being with you."
"You say that now, but everyone leaves me – my mother, Daniel…"
She tried to pull back but he wrapped his arms around her and bent closer.
"I will never leave you. Everything I've done in my life, I've done for you. Every damn last thing. Working like a dog, saving my money, buying into the ranch…all of it."
This time, the sob that welled up in her throat wouldn't be pushed down. Tears spilled over her cheeks and she couldn't stop them. She shook her head.
"How can you not know that I love you?" he growled. "All I do is try to show you."
"I know you love me. Now. But it won't last, it never does, and I can't bear the thought of you leaving me," she said through her tears. "I can't bear it, Jamie."
"It won't happen. I promise." He held her even tighter.
Her chest hurt so bad she could barely breathe. "You can't promise that." She thought of the day her parents died. Ethan's phone call. The knowledge sinking into her heart that she'd never see them again.
Somehow Jamie knew where her thoughts had gone. "Your mother didn't want to leave you. Neither did your father," he said softly.
His quiet words burst the dam that held all the pain she'd been holding back. "I miss her, I miss both of them," she cried. "Oh, God, Jamie, I didn't get to say good-bye!"
"I know, honey." He brushed his lips over the top of her head.
"She thought I hated her. I was so angry…"
"She knew you loved her. She knows it now."
"Why didn't she just tell us what had happened? So we knew why she had to leave all the time? Why didn't she tell us the truth?" Her words came out in broken phrases.
"She was afraid," Jamie said softly. "Fear makes us do strange things."
Claire laughed, a painful, torn sound. "It made me keep buying materials for your house until I had four times as much as I could possibly use."
"It made me jump the gun and propose before we'd ever gone out on a date."
She took a deep, shuddering breath and wiped her face with the back of her hand. "It's kept me from loving you."
"I know." He tightened his embrace. "Please stop being afraid. I want to make a life with you."
Claire lowered her head onto his chest and listened to the beat of his heart. She could change history right now, she knew. She could stop the cycle of fear and pain if she only had the courage to do it.
"What if I screw this up, too? What if I get scared again and can't do it?"
"I'll wait for you," Jamie said. "You're worth waiting for, Claire."
* * * * *
In the end they slept out on the open range, making love once more under a crescent moon while the horses stood nearby. This time their lovemaking was slow and sensual, a thorough exploration of each by the other. When Claire fell asleep in his arms, exhausted by the long day and heavy emotions, Jamie watched the moonlight trace shadows over the contours of her face.
This woman he knew so well held enough mysteries to keep his attention riveted for a lifetime, and he had no doubt they would dream up plenty of schemes to keep themselves busy throughout it, too. It had seemed important to him that Claire give up her interior design work and return to the ranch business when she was his wife, and he saw now that was based on fear, too.
It didn't matter if they worked together, or if they spent their days apart; he and Claire would last – he would bet on that.
In the morning, when he woke up, she was gazing at him.
"Hey, how're you feeling?" he asked, coming up on one elbow.
"Good. Peaceful." She rolled onto her back. The sight of her brought lustful thoughts swirling into his brain, but he kept them in check. He wanted to hear what she had to say.
"The open country helps me sort my thoughts, you know what I mean?"
He nodded. "Yep. Same for me."
"Mom tried to have it all – she tried to be everything to everyone without admitting she'd made mistakes and she ended up hurting us all. But what she did isn't who she is. Was." Jamie braced himself, ready for more tears, but Claire remained dry-eyed. "She loved all of us. Every last one. Me, Ethan, Dad, Morgan. She did her best."
"She did."
"I like Morgan."
Jamie laughed. "As much as you don't want to?"
She rolled to face him again, nodding ruefully. "I really wanted to hate her, but I can't. She's pretty cool."
"Crazy, too. Going with you after Daniel."
"You should see her swing a bat." She sobered. "You said she's hurt? We should get her to a doctor."
"It's just a really big bruise. Really, really big. We'll get her checked out but she'll be okay."
"I should never have gotten her involved."
"You should have gotten me involved. I'd do anything to help you, you know that, right?"
She was silent a minute. "I guess I do now."
"Claire," he sat up and drew her up, too. "Will you marry me?"
"I already said yes."
"I need to hear you say it again."
"Yes."
"Forever?"
"Yes."
"For always?
"Yes!" She lunged forward, wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him until he fell over. "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!"
"I'd put a ring on your finger, but it's already there," he said, holding it up.
"And it's never coming off again."
CHAPTER TWENTY THREE
A more ragged and woebegone group of riders had probably never straggled their way onto the Cruz ranch, Claire thought as she followed the rest of them up to the stable yard. Half the participants were nursing a horrendous hangover. The other half had barely slept. The long ride and bright sunshine tired everyone out.
"I hope Autumn's got a hell of a dinner planned," Ethan mumbled as he helped them begin to unsaddle the horses. The guests made their way slowly up to the Big House. The Mathesons stayed to unpack gear, then went home to clean up. They would return for dinner since it was their guests' last big meal, but she had a feeling it would be an early night. The women would board a plane back to Pennsylvania in the morning. Morgan's flight would leave soon after.
"I wonder what kind of reviews they're going to write. I hope
this was all worth it," Claire said as she and Jamie staggered back to his cabin. She'd already picked up a change of clothes.
Jamie shook his head. "I can only imagine."
"I call the shower first."
"Me, too."
She sagged into him, laughing, and he put an arm around her waist.
This is good, she thought, relishing the feel of him. I can get used to this.
* * * * *
"I'll see you in September," Morgan said.
"That's a long time." Rob looked awfully serious, Jamie thought as he and Claire hung back to give the other two some privacy before Morgan got on her plane.
"You've got my email."
"That's not the same."
Morgan cocked her head. "So, come visit."
"Canada? Hell, I've hardly been out of Montana."
"The change will do you good."
Amen to that, Jamie thought. Rob was a good friend, but the man's interests were limited. He could stand to broaden his experience.
"You could come back here sooner," Rob said.
"I have a job."
Rob sighed. Claire laughed out loud at his hang-dog expression. "They're boarding your flight, Morgan."
"I know." She touched Rob's hand. "You know where to find me, cowboy." Turning to Claire and Ethan she added, "I'll miss you guys so much."
"We'll miss you, too," Claire said. "We have so much more to find out about each other."
"I'm looking forward to finding it all out. 'Bye. Love you!" With shining eyes, she hurried away to join the line of passengers waiting for their turn to show their tickets to the flight attendant.
Claire looked wistful, but judging by Rob's expression, he was going to miss Morgan more than she was, Jamie thought. Normally, Rob was a love-'em-and-leave-'em kind of guy, but he sensed this ran deeper. Maybe his friend had finally met his match. Judging by the quick, furtive kiss he and Morgan exchanged when Claire wasn't looking, she returned his interest, at least a little.
She had promised to come back on Labor Day to be in their wedding. Claire asked her to stand up with her and Morgan had accepted with a shout of happiness that had them all covering their ears.
"Who's your best man going to be?" Rob had asked him.
"Maybe it should be Ethan, since he asked me to be his," Jamie said, grinning at Rob's reaction.
"Ethan? Come on, what about me? We've always been friends."
"Or maybe Cab. He's someone I can depend on."
"To hell with Cab! You know I'm the one who always bails you out."
It was too much fun tormenting Rob to let him know he'd already decided to ask him to be his best man. Let him sweat a few more days, at least.
"You should have asked her to stay," Rob said to Claire.
"On the ranch?"
"Why not?"
"You heard her – she has a job. Her life's in Victoria."
"Some life. Working for other people. Living alone. She belongs here." Rob shoved his hands in his pockets and glanced at Jamie. "Don't see what you're smiling about."
"Someone owes me some money," he said. His grin widened when Rob's shoulders slumped.
"I'll get it to you as soon as I can." He wandered off toward the window overlooking the tarmac.
Claire took Jamie's hand. "What was that all about?"
"Just getting a little revenge."
* * * * *
Several weeks later, Claire held Jamie's hand again while they watched the sun set in a blaze of reds and pinks. They stood on the front steps of Jamie's log house, sharing a bottle of beer. Most of the interior work was finished, but they hadn't moved the furniture in yet. They'd carried an air mattress and sleeping bags over from the cabin and planned to camp out here tonight, to get the feel for the space, as she'd put it to him earlier.
"I'm glad you'll be able to get your money back for most of that extra stuff you bought," Jamie said.
"Yeah. Most of it. The rest I'll save for future projects. We'll use it or sell it one way or another." She'd already packed up most of her belongings and moved them to Jamie's cabin until the log house was finished. Carrie and her boyfriend planned to take over the lease on her condo.
They both turned around as a truck pulled up the dirt driveway to the house.
"Who the hell is that?" Jamie said, getting to his feet.
This was a strange time for visitors, Claire agreed. Then she recognized the top-of-the-line luxury truck. "It's Carl."
Jamie sighed and moved forward to meet him. Carl climbed down from the cab, looking awkward in his cowboy boots. Claire felt a pang of sympathy for the man. He really was a fish out of water in these parts, no matter how hard he tried to fit in.
"Claire – I've been looking for you everywhere," he said as he met them in the drive. "Took a devil of a lot of asking to get Autumn to tell me where you'd gotten to."
"Where's the fire?" Jamie asked.
"Just got back in town and I want to hire you for my decorating project before your schedule gets full up," Carl said. "That Daniel Ledstrom turned out to be some piece of work. Did you know he's an addict?"
"Yeah," Claire said. "We had an idea."
"Can't have a criminal decorating my house. That's not good enough for Lacey."
"Are you saying I am?" Claire asked him, holding his gaze.
His cheeks reddened. "I might have been a little caustic with you before and I apologize for that. Business is like that. You've got to push to get the best out of people sometimes."
"Things are different around here," Jamie said. "Here we get to know one another. We take character into account. Reward good work and loyalty."
"I'm learning that," Carl said. He turned back to Claire. "I looked over your original designs again and they're good. You made solid choices and you worked to keep the bottom line under control. I appreciate that. I might want some upgrades – I've got money to spend – but I think you can handle the job just fine. Will you take it?"
She glanced at Jamie. "I don't think so. I'm going into a whole new line of work."
Carl's face fell, and she felt a pinch of disappointment herself. A project as large as Carl's didn't come along every day.
Jamie squeezed her hand. "You don't have to give up your passions for me," he said.
"I want to work with you. I like being around the horses."
"Why not do both?"
A thrill of excitement coursed through her. "You think I could?"
"I don't see why not. When you feel like decorating a mansion, decorate a mansion. When the horses call you, come on a ride. Just carve out a night for me now and then, okay?"
Pure happiness warmed her from within. "Every night."
Carl cleared his throat. "I'll leave you two to your romantic evening. Come by tomorrow and we'll set up a contract, Claire."
"Sure will," she said.
When he was gone, she leaned into Jamie. "Thank you."
"For what?"
"For seeing all of me, and…"
"Loving you?" He pulled her into an embrace. "I do love you, Claire. I always will."
"I've been thinking about our bet," she added, snuggling closer to him, "and I realized you lost, after all. You touched me before I agreed to marry you."
"Are you kidding? I won, definitely." The contentment in his voice made her smile.
"Actually," she said, feeling pretty content herself. "I think we both did."
About the Author
Cora Seton loves cowboys, country life, gardening, bike-riding, and lazing around with a good book. Mother of four, wife to a computer programmer/eco-farmer, she ditched her California lifestyle eight years ago and moved to a remote logging town in northwestern British Columbia.
Like the characters in her novels, Cora enjoys old-fashioned pursuits and modern technology, spending mornings transforming a neglected one-acre lot into a paradise of orchards, berry bushes and market gardens, and afternoons writing the latest Chance Creek romance novel on her iPad mini. Visit www.coraset
on.com to read about new releases, contests and other cool events!
The Cowboys of Chance Creek series continues with Morgan and Rob’s story, in The Cowboy Imports a Bride.