After getting what he needed, the teacher scurried off in the other direction. When he got a hold of one of the more popular tabloids they offered him a some that made his knees quiver. He wasn't going to work at that awful school anymore. He wasn't going to have to keep trying to scrape by on a teachers wage that barely paid the rent and left him eating Ramen Noodles night after night. Things were going to change in his life.
“Do you have any idea what this is going to do to me?”
Chelsea rolled her eyes. It was her father again. This time he was raging about the pictures of them in the study hall. She, Billy, and Shane had all been caught fooling around by someone on camera. It didn't matter to Chelsea anymore if what she did affected her father negatively. There didn't seem to be many ways around offending people. Everyone with an opinion wanted to chime in on everything they did, especially after the last scandal. People were going to have a hay day with this one, Chelsea knew it, and so did her father. It wasn't easy to think about all the trouble she was causing, so she didn't. Lord knew that her father hadn't thought about it, so why should she?
“You aren't even listening to me,” her father went on. “You never are.”
“You know what,” Chelsea said. “Maybe it's time you listen to me. I know you think you're somehow blameless in everything that just happened, but you aren't, and those are just the facts. So you don't get to sit there and level blame at me as if you're blameless. You don't get to harp on everything I do that gets snapped up by the press. I don't want their attention, do you understand? And I'm sorry I'm your daughter, I'm really am. I wish I had another father who didn't break the marriage apart by getting caught fooling around with someone half their age. You know what I mean? Do you understand me? Are you listening?”
Her father stood stunned. He hadn't ever heard Chelsea talk this way, and she'd most assuredly never talked this way to him before.
“You have to understand, father, that I'm a human being, too,” Chelsea said. “And I'm done acting like I'm just an extension of you. I want to be my own person, my own way. I know you'll understand someday.”
Her father yelled after her as she stormed out of the room. It wasn't long until he was leaving her sobbing voice mails. He was a sad, scared, lonely person inside, Chelsea knew this as well as anyone that knew her father well. He was one of the least likeable people she'd ever met, and she didn't think that was going to change anytime soon. She didn't expect him to change for her. She knew that she wasn't going to change for him. The way she was was the way she was going to to stay. There was no way she was going to change for a politician because public opinion didn't like what she was doing. The mere suggestion of that made her stomach turn.
She picked up her phone and called Shane.
“Shane,” Chelsea said. “Sorry to call you so late. I know you have practice tomorrow. But my father and I just had a major blowout and I need someone to talk to about it. There just isn't anyone else in my life like you, and I know you'll know exactly what I'm going through because you just went through it yourself.”
“I'm glad you called me,” Shane said. “It's important that you talk to people when this sort of thing happens. It isn't fair to you that your father expects you to keep everything bottled up all of the time. There is no way to really do that, so I'm not sure why he would start things out between you two with an unrealistic expectation. It just isn't fair, because there is no way for you to stop considering your situation, and there is no way for him to stop his own feelings. I don't know if this is making any sense. We've been talking a lot about the spirituality behind yoga at my gym, and maybe I'm starting to absorb some of it.”
“It sounds like it,” Chelsea said. “And I appreciate that. Because I really need to keep my head on straight, and it's hard to do, you know? My father has so much power, and I know he can rain shit down on my life if he wants to. He's already left me a few voice mails that were pretty desperate. He wants me back in his life, because I just stormed out of it.”
“You know what, maybe he needs to think about it for a second,” Shane said. “And maybe you do as well. I'm free if you want to hang out. Billy is coming over in a minute. They are having a downer of a day as well. Maybe we could play some bored games and cheer each other up!”
Chelsea laughed and agreed. She loved her friends. It was so nice to be able to get a phone call from someone that made her smile and turned her day around. That was always a good feeling. And now she had plans! And ones that she really couldn't wait for. This was the kind of feeling that her father would never understand, or think was proper. He just wanted her to feel badly all the time, or so it seemed. She wasn't sure anymore what he wanted her to feel, but she figured the best thing to do was try to forget about all of the serious stuff. It just didn't seem like it mattered that much when she was with the other two.
Chelsea smiled to herself as she thought about getting to hang out with her two favorites. She hoped they had a fun time, even if they ended up skipping the boardgames.
The three women spent the rest of the early morning playing bored games like Scrabble and Monopoly. It was so good for Chelsea she couldn't deny that her father had really been impacting her mental health negatively, and that, of course, just wasn't fair to her. Who wanted someone who was domineering and unfair to everyone in their lives? Who wanted that around? It just wasn't a good thing, and it was toxic to her like a poison.
“I'm glad that you decided to come hang with me and Billy,” Shane said. “I know it would have been easier to seclude yourself from everything. That's what I usually do when things like you just went through happen to me. Has your father left you any more messages?”
“I don't think so,” Chelsea said. “And I'm the one who should be thanking you! You're going to be so tired at practive today, and during school. I know you have a bunch of classes today, so it means a lot to me that you made the time to take care of me like you did. It's important for me to have friends, and to know people who are like me and have similar experiences. Maybe not knowing women like you two for so long has allowed me to succumb to the tug of the easy way out, of not confronting my father with my feelings and making him give me an account as to why he acts the way he does.”
They all agreed that Chelsea should talk to her father more, and that no matter what happened, Billy and Shane would be there for her. Chelsea appreciated this more than anything. It was so good to have support. That was something she'd been sorely missing in her life. She didn't like to think about how there had been many times when she'd simply given in to the desire to be liked, or to have things go her way without having to put up a fight or pout.
Now she was going to confront her father, and that was something she wasn't looking forward to.
“Dad, I think I'm ready to talk,” Chelsea said. “I know that you're probably busy right now, so when you get a chance to look at your phone just text me or something.”
Chelsea didn't like to put her father on the spot when it came to talking to her, even when it was something like clearing up their latest fight. She liked to give him, and everyone else, the chance to be their own person and do their own thing. Letting people be themselves was important to Chelsea
Her father called her right back, and Chelsea answered.
“I'd like to talk,” her father said. “You know that you mean the world to me. And if you want to be in a non hetero-normative relationship with two other women, well then you know what? It looks like I'll have a whole new demographic to court for votes.”
Chelsea laughed at this in spite of herself.
“You know what dad,” Chelsea said. “That's the best thing I've heard you say in a really long time. I appreciate you taking the time to call me back. I'll talk to you in a little bit when we're both home.”
Chelsea went through the rest of her day at school, going from class to class. It was always hard for her to stay on task in class. And today, with so much going on in her life, with so much on her mind, it was e
specially hard to stay on task. She had a lot to think about, and so little time to process. Maybe processing wasn't exactly what was necessary. Maybe she needed to just act, to just do, and to feel what there was to be felt on the other side of consequence.
When Chelsea and her father spoke, it was late again.
“You know I love you, right?” her father said. “I want you to know that I love you. And that I have your back no matter what. I know recently I fucked up, but your mother and I hadn't been in love in quite some time. There was nothing keeping me in that relationship. I should have just told her to go, but she wouldn't. So instead of doing the hard thing, the right thing, I copped out. I know that must sound even shittier than I feel about it, but I don't want you to think less of me because of it.”
“I love you too, dad,” Chelsea said. “I just needed to hear you say what you just said. You know that it can be hard when you get lonely. I know you know about that. So, yeah, I guess I should say I'm sorry. Or maybe I shouldn't, but I'm going to anyway. Hopefully you can understand what I've been going through.”
“I think I sort of can,” her father said. “It's just hard for me to know that I've hurt you, you know? I never meant to do that. I always thought that if I gave you all the money you could ask for that it would somehow automatically make you happy. I guess I fell prey to something that a lot of people fall prey to, thinking that material wealth would somehow replace what really should have been there. I just hope it isn't too late for me to turn things around when it comes to our relationship.”
Chelsea listened and nodded. She and her father ended up having a cup of decaf coffee together and watching the late night show with a man Chelsea wasn't sure the name of. Her father and his generation seemed to like the late show comics much more than her own generation. She always thought of the late night comics as something people watched when they were working late at night, something that kept them abreast of everything that was happening during the day when they were sleeping or getting ready to go to work.
When it was all said and done a few days later, Chelsea and her father had signed up to go to family therapy, something her father had been very leery of in the past. It was always great to know that he was willing to go the extra mile, although now the extra mile was going to be the new normal.
Family therapy went well, much to both of their surprise, and they kept going. Chelsea worked out some of her daddy issues, and realized that, ultimately, her behavior was her own. There was no way for her to blame it on anyone else. She had to accept that things that were in her control were hers to have and own. Her father, of course, had many similar epiphanies. It was like a father shouldn't have done any of the things he'd done to cause so much despair in his family.
That was all water under the bridge now, as their therapist liked to say. They needed to press forward and not dwell on the past. They needed to be upstanding adults to each other and the rest of the community, and they needed to show each other that they loved one another. That was the only way that their lives would be whole again. Once they accepted one another for who the other was, only then would they start to feel like they were part of something like a family.
Hidden Passions
~ Bonus Story ~
A First Time Straight To Gay Lesbian Romance
Pride always comes before a fall but Teri Alexander had little idea just how hard she would fall after she finally swallowed her pride and reached out to the cold, but beautiful, Nicola M Clarke. Everything for the children – always for the children. But at what point does the arrangement stop being a financial agreement and become one of uncontrollable desire and hidden passion? The tug-of-war that will inevitably drive both parties insane in no slow manner begins in a simple misunderstanding and ends in sheer lust and chaos! Worlds apart, their realities merge into an entangled affair incapable of allowing either woman the ending of their choice. But what is worse – losing your mind or losing the one you cannot live without? Will Nicola solve the riddle in time before the illusion shatters forever? This time it’s not for the children…
* * *
Teri’s stressful work-day would have ended in the usual exhausted collapse if the computer screen didn’t suddenly send her into an immediate panic. She cursed under her breath as the forgotten meeting reminder popped up.
She grabbed her things frantically, careful not to slam the aging, cooked door as she hurriedly searched for the restaurant on Google Maps. She wouldn’t normally agree to a wine-and-dine scenario with possible funders. But she was desperate for the money, more so than she’d admit. If she bagged this grant, her financial woes would be something of the past – at least for the next couple of years.
By the time she reached the restaurant for which she was completely underdressed, her shoulder-length blonde hair was coming undone over her flushing cheeks and she looked like and out-of-breath madwoman.
She was only 10 minutes late (okay 14 minutes) but she started panicking as she quickly scanned the classy venue for the well-known face that she had yet to encounter in person.
“Can I help you ma’am?” the hostess queried.
“Miss,” she corrected habitually. “Yes, I’m here to meet with Nicola Clarke. I’m running late, she should be here already…”
“Oh yes. I’m sorry… Miss Clarke won’t be making it this evening,” the hostess said. “Her assistant phoned earlier. Miss Clarke was unfortunately called away on a personal matter but you should feel free to enjoy the evening at her expense. We’ll put it all on her tab.”
“What? But we had a meeting, I…” Teri protested.
“I’m sorry – I was just asked to deliver the message. I don’t have any further details. Please, if you’ll follow the waiter, they’ll show you to your table.”
“No, thanks, I’m… Actually, you know what – sure,” she was about to decline but thought better of it. After the week she had, a drink (or two) actually sounded good.
By the time she sat down at the elegant table (alone), her annoyance had turned to anger. By the time she'd finished the first whiskey, she was fuming. Three later she was furious! ‘The nerve,' she thought to herself, signaling the waiter for yet another refill. ‘I guess a little dance studio in town isn’t worth the famous Nicola M Clarke’s time, urgh.’
She had a few more than she planned caught an Uber taxi home, fumbling with her phone as she drunkenly searched for Nicola’s email to tell her exactly what she thought of being stood up – even if it was by “someone who had more money than common sense”.
Nicola scrolled through her emails listlessly as she paced the hospital hallways. Work was the last thing on her mind, but she welcomed the distraction. If she pestered the doctor again regarding her uncle’s condition, she feared that she might be forcedly removed from the premises. Her impatience was driving her insane!
They kept replying that they were busy with ‘treatment’ but she had no idea what that actually meant. She rushed over the moment she heard he’s been rushed to the hospital, dropping everything as she shouted "Cancel the rest of the day!" on her way out of the office. The office she wouldn’t even have without her uncle’s help and support.
Junk, junk, I'll deal with it later, junk – she scrolled through the emails almost in auto-pilot. It wasn't until she reached the one entitled ‘How not to be a complete b***', sent from a Teri Alexander at 11:37 pm, that she paused. Teri, the owner of the dance studio for disabled kids she was supposed to meet for dinner to discuss possible funding. ‘Oh right, that was today,’ she remembered. This day had been so chaotic, she hadn’t even thought about it until right now. She opened the mail, curiosity quickly turning to annoyance...
‘Dear Miss Clarke
Thank you for being so kind as to let me drink on your tab. Such a considerate person, always looking out for those less fortunate than herself.
I’m sorry you couldn’t be bothered to show up for our meeting. I know
your time must be worth sooo much. You could have at least let me know!
But I suppose you had better things to do. I’m sure that haircut takes a lot of time. Or maybe you had to take your dog to the psychologist.
I’ll have you know that I’ve worked my fingers to the bone for this dance studio and it’s making a massive difference in the community. These kids have never been given a chance before – unlike you who’ve just been handed everything on a silver platter. The least you could do was at least hear me out.
But I suppose people like you…’
Nicola closed the mail and exited her inbox. ‘The bloody nerve of this woman,’ she thought angrily. ‘I’ll deal with this later.’
After what felt like ages, the nurse finally allowed her into the room where her uncle smiled weakly from his sick bed.
“Nicola, darling,” he reached out to her and she grabbed his arm tenderly, her cold demeanor from before completely transformed.
"Oh, uncle! You had me worried there. When they said you collapsed, I expected the worst! I'm so glad you're okay," she sat down next to the bed, still clinging to the fragile hand.
“I’m far from okay, dear.”
“Nonsense, we’ll have you out of this stuffy place in no time…”
Double Grades Page 7