My boss walks in from around the corner. “What was that all about? Did she buy something?”
“It’s complicated.” That’s all I could say. I quietly turn around and walk back to my desk, my mind in a daze. This was happening. This was really happening.
CHAPTER 4
I could barely sleep at all that night, and as soon as my alarm rang, I bolted out of bed, my heart already racing. I had set my alarm for earlier because I knew I needed extra time to prep in the morning. I had to look impressive. Let Rachel know she didn’t make a mistake coming back to me.
About an hour later I stood in front of the mirror, staring at a perfectly primped version of myself. I was even impressed with myself. I hadn’t looked this good in ages.
I walk into the restaurant with confidence and immediately spot Rachel sitting at a high table, looking more gorgeous than ever. A daring red dress clung to her stunning figure while showing off her long, slender legs. She’s sipping a glass a wine and scrolling through her phone, probably answering work messages.
I strut over to the table and slide into my seat. Rachel doesn’t look up from her phone until I clear my throat, trying to get her attention.
“Wow… you look gorgeous.” Rachel says with widened eyes.
“Thanks, so do you,” I say sensually, not really sure where this random confidence came from.
A waitress wearing stilettos and too much lipstick stops at our table and takes my drink order.
“So,” I break the awkward silence, “Don’t you have to go back to your job?”
Rachel shrugs. “When I realized I wanted to stay here with you, I talked to my boss and he gave me some more work I could do in town. Could keep me here for… at least another couple weeks.”
“Good,” I give her a half smile.
The waitress brings back my drink. We both order food and the waitress walks away, obviously fed up with her job.
“So you said your life isn’t that interesting?” Rachel asks.
“Ugh,” I put my head in my hands. “No. I try to spice things up, but plans always fall through.”
“What about what we did the other night?” She puts her hand on my arm, immediately giving me goosebumps. “That was pretty spicy…”
“Oh… yeah… I’ve never done anything like that.”
Rachel nods proudly, taking a sip of her drink.
“So I want you to be my arm candy to this party tonight.”
My immediate answer was no. No one could know about what was going on between us. I wasn’t ready to make it public. Especially with Tom still being left in the dark. I was such an asshole for not giving him an answer. Didn’t want to make myself look like even more of one.
“What kind of party?”
“It’s just a business dinner. We don’t have to stay long.”
"Um, I don't think I'm ready to make this a public thing. Or even an official thing. In reality, I've only known you a couple days. ”
“You mean this?” Rachel leans over the table and plants a kiss on my lips. I don’t know why but her lips were just electric, pulsing a spark through my entire body. “I…” I was speechless. I catch a couple of people around us looking and part of me just wanted to get up and run out.
“Yes?” Rachel raised her eyebrow, waiting for me to finish my thought.
“I don’t want to just be your arm candy. I’ve been an accessory to someone’s success before and I can’t do it again.”
“Kelly,” Rachel leans forward, “I need you by my side.” The confidence breaks and she’s vulnerable. “You make me feel calm. My thoughts are more collected. The only way I can describe it is that when I feel your touch… that’s the only time my head is in order.”
“But you always seem so collected,” I say, a little taken aback at her suddenly spilling out her heart.
She chuckles sadly, “It’s called acting. It’s called, trying to get ahead in your career. I’m stressed 24/7. This job is literally my entire life. I have no time or energy to do anything else. And being a lesbian in the business world makes it even harder to climb your way to the top of the chain.” She intertwines her hand in mine. “That night with you was the first time I’ve truly enjoyed anything in years. I didn’t think about work at all that night. And it was… like magic.”
I fought to hold back the tears. No one had ever been that real with me. No one had ever told me that I made their life better.
“Please. If you be my gorgeous date to this dinner, afterwards I’m all yours. We can do anything you want. And then…” She started sliding her fingers up and down my arm, “Have a repeat of the other night.”
My stomach flip-flopped with butterflies. “Okay.”
“Thank you so much.” She kisses my hand, looking so relieved.
I went back to work and tried so hard to keep my hair and make-up perfect for the rest of the afternoon. She called me gorgeous. She said I make her look good. No one had ever made me feel that needed. I called Carl and told him the entire story and repeated everything she said like I had written it down word-for-word. He “couldn’t handle the cuteness” or whatever, but did remind me I needed to give Tom an answer.
I knew I needed to give him an answer. I would after tonight. I just needed one more night with Rachel before making my final decision.
—————
The business dinner was a bit intimidating. Everyone was dressed to the hilt and talking about things way beyond my comprehension. But other than that everyone was honestly pretty bland.
Rachel and I walked in arm-in-arm. I felt so out of place but she assured me I was fine. Of course, we got a couple judgmental glances but she didn't seem to care. My guess is she came out quite a while ago and has brought dates to work functions before, so she's used to these types of reactions. But I'm not. The glares some of the older folk give us make my stomach churn. A couple people shake their heads in disapproval and my insecurity shoots through the roof.
But we take our seats and act like everything is perfectly fine. We eat quietly while listening to boring speakers, and create some awkward small talk with the people at our table. Rachel made sure to never leave my side. She kept apologizing that it was taking a lot longer than expected.
“I thought you said we didn’t have to stay long,” I mutter into her ear.
“I’m sorry.” Under the table, Rachel puts her hand on my upper thigh. “We’ll get out of here soon enough,” hinting that she couldn’t wait for us to be alone like she promised.
As soon as the speakers were done, Rachel and I said a few quick goodbyes and then bolted. They offered for everyone to stay around as long as they would like but neither of us wanted to be around these cynical, old farts any longer than we absolutely had to.
When we get out of the building, we both take a huge sigh of relief.
"That was probably the most exhausting business meeting I've ever sat in on," I say.
"Surprisingly that's far from the most tedious thing I've ever had to do for work," Rachel says as she waves down a cab. "Where to?" She asks me as we climb into the back seat.
“How about,” I hesitate, “My apartment.”
Rachel smiles excitedly. “Perfect.”
I give the cab driver my address and he takes off. This ride isn’t nearly as awkward as the last one. We weren’t perfect strangers anymore. I now knew a side of her that was soft and sensitive. She wasn’t just the fearless business woman I first thought she was.
As we drive through the city I stare at her perfect complexion. The lights of New York at night reflect off the glass, casting a warm, golden glow onto her face. And I had never felt so much admiration for one person in my entire life. Here she was, this hard-working, brave badass, finally taking a step back from her hectic life and just living in the moment. There is a soft smile on her face as she gazes at the lights like they’re the gates of Heaven.
We arrive at my apartment, which is barely bigger than Rachel’s fancy-ass suite, but she didn’t
seem to mind. I take her hand and she follows me inside. As soon as we step inside she shuts the door and pins me against the wall, laying a passionate kiss onto my lips. Her lips linger as her tongue intertwines with mine. My hands run through her hair, messing up its styled perfection.
Rachel reaches around and unzips the back of my dress, and I let it fall to the ground. She then slides her hands down my bare back and I pull her even closer.
“I almost like that red dress too much to take it off you,” I say between kisses.
“Too bad.” Rachel unzips her dress and slides it off. My eyes are starstruck. She’s not wearing anything underneath.“I was feeling daring tonight,” Rachel teases as she kisses me again.
Never taking our hands off each other, we stumble our way into the living room and collapse on the couch. She inches her lips down my body slowly. When she kisses underneath my belly button my entire body pulses with energy. She pulls down my thong and begins to work her magic with that devil of a mouth. I cry out with pleasure and want to come at that very moment but hold it back. She gets her hands involved and it is almost too much to handle. My body squirms with joy and I grab her hair, never wanting her to stop.
She starts moving faster and I feel myself getting closer to the end. At the very last minute, she shoots her head up to my face and gives me a big long, juicy kiss. And I experience the most earth-shattering climax I’ve ever had.
It takes me several moments to begin to catch my breath.
“How’d you do that?” I say between breaths.
Rachel straddles me. “It’s a specialty.”
"My turn," I say confidently. But in reality, I was freaking out. I had no idea what I was doing. I rarely ever did this on a man, let alone a woman.
“If you say so,” Rachel says as we switch positions on the couch.
“Okay,” I take a deep shaky breath, obviously hesitant.
“Hey,” Rachel puts her hand on my arm, “It’s okay.”
I smile and then go down on her, starting out very gently and cautiously, but soon enough easing myself into it. At first, it felt so very uncomfortable for my tongue to be licking a woman’s body, but then the sweet scent of her skin soon made the perfect companion to my mouth.
“Holy shit, Kelly…” She was clearly enjoying it.
I was now fully confident in the way my mouth worked on her skin, and was determined to make her come. Her breathing gets harder and her body begins pulsing. I rub my hands up and down her inner thighs which makes her open up her legs even wider. Before long, Rachel screams and she comes. I feel proud and daring, all the sudden ready for anything else we were going to do.
After Rachel catches a couple breaths, she says “You had no reason to be nervous.”
I smile, a brand new sense of confidence in my eyes. I lean down and envelop her lips once again. She pulls me down deeper as we remain in a passionate embrace. I never wanted to leave this position. I wished time would freeze and Rachel would never have to leave town. That we’d never have to put clothes back on. That we could just lay here forever. Granted, it was a sticky, hot mess, but it was our mess. Our strange, yet beautiful mess. And I didn’t want it to end.
At the end of the night, we eventually had made our way over the bed. We just laid there for hours, enjoying each other’s company. Each other’s touch.
“When do you have to go back home?” I say, bringing up the inevitable.
“Way to kill the mood.” Rachel jokes.
“I’m serious.”
"Probably two weeks," Rachel says discouragingly.
“So we only have two more weeks together?”
“I just want to focus on right now. We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.” Rachel kisses my forehead.
She was right. This was perfection. I couldn’t imagine being anywhere else in the world. I felt safe in Rachel’s embrace.
At that moment I came to the realization that I did not want to marry Tom. I never felt fully safe in his arms. It always felt kind of fake or forced. And what would a life of security be without love? Without passion?
This felt so natural. So simple and easy.
CHAPTER 5
The best part about all of this was that when I woke up the next morning, she was still there. Making breakfast, in fact, wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt she must’ve found in my dresser.
“Good morning, beautiful,” Rachel gives me a warm smile from across the room.
Throughout the day I notice that Rachel has turned into a completely different person. She didn’t talk about work once and wanted to just spend a day out on the town. I invited Carl, and we spent the entire day walking around New York City, clothes shopping, trying new foods, and not having a care in the world.
Rachel looked happier than I’d ever seen her. And I felt happier and more energized than I had been since I was a kid. But when evening time rolled around, I started wearing down, but Rachel was raring to keep going. She wanted to go out to a club and dance the night away.
Rachel's job was high-stress. She was used to having an endless supply of energy and being active for hours upon hours. Yet at my job I sat at a desk for most of the day, and did very little physical activity outside of work.
After dinner, I tell her I was gonna head home and that she could go out and have fun. But she guilts me, “Oh come on, Kelly. Please come out with me. It won’t be any fun unless you’re there!”
My body was so exhausted and all I wanted to do was put on sweatpants and curl up in bed. But I couldn't say no to her beautiful, begging eyes. So we went out to one of the top-rated nightclubs in the area. I tried to make the excuse that I couldn't afford it but she insisted she'd pay my way.
It was a Saturday night and the club is packed to the hilt. The atmosphere is thick and foggy. LED lights flash from all around, making me dizzy. You can practically feel the sweat and raging hormones crawling across your skin. The grinding that was happening all over the dance floor could’ve basically been deemed as dry humping. Both girls and guys everywhere wore next to nothing, and the sweat glimmered on their skin under the hot lights.
All the waiters and waitresses are dressed in some sort of silver, and I was surprised they never ran into anyone. The whole place was actually quite intimidating. Rachel noticed my entire demeanor closing up.
“What’s the problem?” She whines.
“I think I’m just gonna go home… This isn’t really my scene.”
“No! Just have some fun!” Rachel tries to loosen me up. She flags down a waiter and orders a couple of drinks.
I spot an empty table in the corner. “I’m too tired to dance. You go ahead. I’ll just sit.”
Rachel frowns, defeated. “Ugh, fine.” She starts walking towards the dance floor. “Party pooper!” She calls back.
I sit down at the corner table before anyone else could claim it. It was where I felt safest. I didn’t have to have random guys and girls grinding their sex-crazed, sweaty bodies against me.
Rachel stayed towards the side of the dance floor, purposely so I could still see her. She let the heavy beat take her away and she let go of all inhibitions. She was free. She made eye contact with me and slowed down her movements. She sensually slides her hands down her sides. She swivels her hips in a big, slow circle and looks back towards me, a sexy smile on her face. My body ached to be right up there with her, but I just didn’t have the energy.
Instead, I bundled up my jacket, set it on the table, laid my head down on it and only several moments later, I was dead asleep.
The next thing I know Rachel is tapping my shoulder. “Hey. We have to go.”
I groggily pick my head up and look around. Most of the place has cleared out and the waiters are cleaning up massive messes.
“What time is it?” I utter.
“3am. The place is closing.”
I push myself up and feel a little woozy but eventually catch my balance. My eyes are still half asleep and walking faster than a turtle feels l
ike a full-throttle workout.
Rachel waits until we’re in the cab to start ripping into me. “What the hell was that? I came to the club to have a good time with you, and what do you do? Sit in the corner and fucking sleep!”
She keeps on hurling drunk insults at me but honestly I was too tired to process anything she said.
And it went on like this for the next week. We would spend the day at work and text each other all day long. She would come back to my apartment and we’d eat dinner and talk about our days and usually fool around a little in bed. But then she would want to go out and party. Every. Single. Night. And I would go out with her because she begged me to and waved those hypnotic eyelashes at me, but I would normally just end up sitting at a table by myself by the end of the night. And then her drunk ass would say that I was a boring person and could never break loose and have fun.
She said she liked the constant partying because it made her forgot about work. She could just get a buzz from drinking and then dance her worries away. She would still be hungover the next day, which allowed her to get through work with minimal stress. I loved the more positive and fun side of her, but not like this.
I felt like her chaperone, not her girlfriend. Or whatever this thing between us was.
I could easily just tell her to go get herself a hotel room and then say that it was over. She would go back to where she was from the next week anyway. It would save a lot of heartbreak. But that’d mean I would never be able to touch her again. My heart and mind told me to let her go but my body wanted her to stay. The way she made me feel was enough to convince me to let her stay.
So I was going to just suck it up and go watch her party every night. And maybe if I kept the image of her taking off her clothes in front of me when we went home in my head, it would keep me from walking out.
And it worked. I was able to fake my way through. Until one night, when she requested we go to a strip club. She also requested we go to a men’s strip club, because although she was attracted to girls, having guys shake their junk in her face got her horny, and it would heighten the pleasure of our sex that night.
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