by Gina Wilkins
“Then get some rest. I bought some magazines in the gift shop to entertain myself. I’ll just sit quietly here and you let me know if there’s anything at all you need, okay?”
“Yeah, thanks.” But still he didn’t close his eyes. Lisa wondered if he was afraid to. She remembered how she had seen that knife flashing toward her every time she’d closed her eyes Saturday night.
“Would you like to talk about it, Jake?” she asked gently. “I know you must be still reeling from shock right now.”
“I don’t—” He fell silent, then sighed. “I’ve known Eric since junior high.”
The friend who had died in the crash. “I’m so sorry.”
He nodded. “He was a great guy. He and his ex-wife had a couple of boys. He was going to bring them to a race later in the year. He told me he was going to be around after I won the championship at the end of this season to remind me of what a nerd I used to be in high school—just to keep me from getting bigheaded.”
And now he had lost both his friend and the chance to win the championship, she thought sadly. “I’m sorry,” she said again. “I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better, but I think it’s just going to take time for you to heal. In every way.”
He heaved another deep sigh. “It would be easier if I could race, rather than sitting around for so long with so much time to think.”
Staying busy, focusing on racing. Wade’s usual antidote for anything that ailed him, as well. Must be a personality type, she thought, standing to straighten Jake’s sheets. She was feeling a little maternal toward him at the moment, even though he was two years her senior.
“You’ll be racing again soon enough. Now, try to get some sleep, okay? I’m sure that’s what you need most right now.”
His eyelids were starting to look heavy again, but he fought it off a little longer. “So, how are things with you and Wade?” he asked drowsily.
She patted his hand, taking care to avoid the IV needle, then returned to her seat. “I’ll let you know as soon as I figure that out, myself.”
“He’s not very good at sharing his feelings.”
“That would be an understatement.”
His eyes finally closed as he murmured, “Maybe he could get a little better at it—if someone cared enough to help him.”
“Someone cares enough,” she answered quietly.
His smile was heartbreakingly sad. “I’m glad to hear that. He’s a good man. He deserves to be loved.”
“He is, Jake.”
But Jake was already asleep, the little frown on his face an indication that his dreams weren’t happy ones.
“HE JUST SEEMED SO SAD,” Lisa mused, sitting in her mother’s rose garden with Wade later that evening. “It broke my heart.”
“Jake will be okay,” Wade assured her gruffly, typically uncomfortable with her emotional wording. “He’s lost people before. It never gets any easier, but he’ll pull himself together once he’s back behind the wheel of his car.”
“Racing. The cure for everything that ails you?”
“It is for some of us,” he said simply. “Jake, included.”
Because she was finally beginning to understand that, she nodded. “Then I hope for his sake that he’s back in his car very soon.”
“He’ll be back the minute he gets clearance from the doctors. And he’ll charm them into making that even sooner than they would like.”
She smiled. “Jake does have the charm.”
Wade frowned at her in the moonlight. “Should I be getting jealous here?”
“No,” she assured him with a light laugh. “I seem to be drawn to an entirely different type of charm. A much less obvious type.”
Wade looked as though he wasn’t sure if he’d just been complimented or insulted, but he let it go.
Lisa sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “The last few weeks, the last few days, in particular, have been crazy. I’m exhausted.”
“I won’t keep you much longer. I just have one question for you.”
Suddenly reenergized, she straightened and turned to look at him. “What question?”
“Are you here to stay this time? Because I’m not sure I can handle it if you take off again.”
The unsteadiness in his voice almost undid her. He was trying so hard to be stoic. Working to hide the vulnerabilities he had spent a lifetime denying. Just as it was going to take Jake time to heal from the physical and emotional wounds he had suffered that morning, it was going to take Wade time to learn to fully trust her with his feelings after she had hurt him twice before.
As it happened, they had all the time in the world.
“I’m here to stay,” she assured him firmly. “I’ll have to go back to Chicago only long enough to pack up my apartment and wrap things up at work, but then I’m coming home. I’ve already lined up a couple of job interviews within an hour’s drive of here, and I’m pretty confident that I can take my pick.”
His shoulders seemed to relax a bit. “You want to be close to your parents.”
“Yes. And I want to be close to you. Very close, in fact. I’m rather hoping you’ll offer me a place to live.”
“I just happen to have a fancy motor home and a not-so-fancy, but still quite comfortable house. There’s room for you in both of them.”
“They sound perfect.” She swallowed, then added, “I can’t promise to travel with you to every race, Wade. I love my work, but it can be demanding on my time.”
“As much as I would like to have you with me every weekend, I can be content knowing you’ll be here when I get back,” he returned evenly. “You know how busy I am at the tracks. I don’t need a personal cheerleader standing on the sidelines the whole time. And you won’t have to worry that I’m looking for any other companionship when you’re not there. When I make a commitment, you can take it to the bank.”
“I know that.”
“I’ll be gone a lot, Lees.”
She nodded. “As it happens, I’m pretty good at taking care of myself. But I’ll go with you when I can. And I’ll always be happy to welcome you home.”
He lifted her hand to his lips, an uncharacteristically tender gesture that brought a lump to her throat. “I can’t always promise to be around when you want me, but I will always been there if you need me,” he vowed.
All these years she had told herself that she’d left him because he cared more for racing than for her. When the truth was, she knew now, it had been his inability to express his feelings that had been the real stumbling block for her, leaving her wondering if she would ever really feel important to him.
Blinking back tears, she nodded, making a simple request of her own. “We don’t have to be connected at the hip. Just promise me we’ll always be connected in our hearts.”
“Always. I do love you, you know.”
One tear escaped to slide down her cheek. He was trying to express his emotions, she thought. And while he would never be the poetic type, she suspected he would get much better with time and practice. “I love you, too. I always have. I just needed to grow up enough to understand exactly what that means.”
He kissed her lingeringly, with a strong hint of the passion that would come as soon as the time was right. Her heart was pounding by the time he finally drew back.
He reached into his shirt pocket. “There’s something I’ve been saving for you.”
She watched through a veil of tears as he slipped the diamond ring back into place on her left hand. The horseshoe wasn’t the only thing he’d hung onto after she’d left him, apparently. Had he always hoped he’d have a chance to return this to her?
“I won’t be giving it back this time,” she promised him.
He kissed her again, then rose and held out his hand to her. “Let’s go tell your parents. I think your dad’s been peeking out the windows for the past twenty minutes.”
Laughing, she placed her hand in his, throwing caution to the wind.
ISBN: 978-1-
5525-4856-1
HEARTS UNDER CAUTION
Copyright © 2007 by Harlequin Books S.A.
Gina Wilkins is acknowledged as the author of this work.
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