by Barbara Lohr
“Yep. Bye-bye,” Bo repeated, leaning into her arms. Alex grabbed the beach bag and towels. Minutes later, they were both on the road, his black Mercedes in the lead.
Usually he made the drive to the lake in well under an hour, but today he slowed down, keeping Vanessa and her beige sedan in his rearview mirror. On the way to Michigan, he took some business calls, but it was hard to concentrate. The rearview mirror took priority. When they reached the house, he pulled into the garage, and Vanessa parked right behind him.
Great day for the beach. Sunny but not blistering hot. Sounds of the waves and birds calling drifted up from the beach. Somewhere in the distance, kids were laughing. While Vanessa pulled baby equipment and towels from the back of her car, he worked at the straps of the carseat. Thumping his feet against the front seat, Bo wanted out. Medieval chastity belts had nothing on this carseat. Finally Vanessa reached in and with one snap released it.
Alex grabbed Bo, and the little guy snugged up to his chest as they trotted up the stone steps. Once in the house, he set the toddler down next to the coffee table. “I’ll be right back,” he told Vanessa, moving his iPad and remotes to a high shelf before going upstairs. She was already warning Bo not to touch anything.
Alex changed into his suit first. Then it was Vanessa’s turn. “He can be quick,” she warned Alex. “You have to keep an eye on him.”
“Right, I thought I'd give him some matches.” The horror on her face was priceless. “Kidding. We’ll be fine.”
By that time, Bo was standing in front of the glass window, two fingers stuffed in his mouth. Usually Alex was a stickler about fingerprints on the glass panes. The windows were a major deciding point in his buying the house. He loved the view. Now, Bo was playing patty cake with them, leaving handprints all over. Alex laughed.
When Bo reached up and pulled at a door latch, Alex swung him up and took him out to the patio.
“See the lake?” The sun glistened off the blue water.
Eyes wide, Bo said, “Water.” Only it sounded more like “wa-wa.”
“Lake,” he said. Obviously this was all new to him.
Bo looked around, as if searching for his mother.
“Your mom will be right here. Want to go down to the beach?”
Bo gave a solemn nod. After grabbing a green bucket and yellow shovel he’d picked up in town, Alex carried the toddler down the wooden steps. Kicking his flip flops into the tall grass, he set Bo down and then helped him off with his sandals. For a second, the little guy stood there teetering in the sand as he struggled to find his balance, one hand clasping Alex’s.
The tiny hand sent a weird feeling swirling through Alex’s stomach.
Funny, he’d always thought he didn’t like kids.
Chapter 13
Alex and Bo started toward the water. The sand was hot, too hot. Scooping the little guy up, he began to run. Bo broke into giggles.
“We’re going to make the best sand castle ever,” Alex promised as he set Bo down carefully at the edge of the water.
Teetering in the wet sand on those tiny feet that had big potential, Bo eyed him and the green bucket cautiously. After half filling the pail with water, Alex scooped in sand and tamped it down. Watching Bo’s expression and feeling very much like Houdini, he carefully eased the green plastic up. The little guy’s mouth formed an astonished “O” when the cone-shaped sand stayed put.
“A castle.” Okay, but not the kind his father used to make. Alex had a lot of work to do. “Well, the beginning of a castle.”
Behind him, Vanessa laughed. Her voice massaged the muscles in his back. When he turned around, his entire body turned rigid. She was a knockout in a tiny aqua bikini.
“Can I play too?” Vanessa plopped down in the sand next to Bo. When she leaned toward her son, it was hard for Alex to keep his eyes on the project. “Looks like you're an expert,” she teased.
“My dad’s sand castles were works of art.” One of his better memories.
“Did you say your mother was a history professor?”
“Right. Mom would actually correct my father if he didn't put a deep enough moat around the castle.” If Alex ever had kids, he'd never argue in front of them.
His gaze shifted to Bo. “You’ve done a great job. Seems like he doesn't have a care in the world. Every kid should grow up like this.”
Suddenly she got all teary-eyed.
“What?” he asked. Dammit, what did I say?
“Nothing, just thanks, Alex.” She gave him a soft, shaky smile. Then she turned her attention to Bo.
The little guy looked totally puzzled by the sand. Wiping his palms on his orange shorts, he tried to rub it off.
“It’s not dirt, Bo,” Vanessa explained. “Sand.” Scooping up a handful, she let it run through her fingers. He could almost feel it on his skin.
A rogue shiver chased through Alex as he sat baking on the hot sand. He might have to stay seated for a while. “This his first trip to the beach?”
Eyes glued to her son, Vanessa nodded.
“So his father never takes him?”
Her curves sharpened into angles. “No.”
Turning her head into the breeze, Vanessa gathered Bo into her arms, like she was protecting him. Popping open a bottle of sunscreen, she began to slather it on Bo’s skin. He wasn’t having any of it.
“Hold still now.” While Bo squirmed, Alex had to look away. He wouldn’t mind the same treatment.
“I think he'll be safe,” he finally said, when the poor kid was coated in the white cream.
“That's my goal.” Vanessa tossed the sunscreen to Alex. “Not a bad idea for you either. Come on, Bo. Let's fill the bucket with more water.” She picked up the green pail.
Grabbing the bucket, Bo handed it to Alex. How cool was this?
“So now I'm chopped liver?” Vanessa joked, her face reddening.
Handing the green pail back to Vanessa, Alex laughed. “Let's give your mom a turn, okay?”
As they worked on the sand castle, Alex showed Bo how to drip wet sand through his fingers so it dribbled over the solid sand foundation, one layer over the other. His dad had spent hours doing this, and the final effect was spectacular. The respect in Bo’s eyes grew as Alex mimicked what he’d learned from his father. Vanessa kept them supplied with buckets of water.
Before long, the castle sported three grand turrets and a wide moat. Pretty damn impressive. A man walked by with his two little boys. One of the kids tugged at his dad’s hand. “Can I have a castle like that?”
“Well, we can try.” The father didn’t look too hopeful.
“Didn’t mean to start anything. The secret’s in the dripping.” Spooky, how Alex was channeling his father today.
“Thanks for the tip.” The man shook his head. “Your son sure has your eyes.”
“Oh, no, he’s not…” Alex turned to Vanessa, expecting her to jump in.
Lips parted, she glanced at the stranger and then down at Bo. Everything stopped—like someone had hit the pause button. The man moved on.
“Vanessa…?”
“Want to swim?” Vanessa asked Bo, jumping up and knocking over the bucket. Suddenly, she was a mad woman, digging around in her bag. In a few seconds, she had Bo in special swim diapers under blue trunks. Together, the three of them stepped into the water. Bo became rigid, staring down to where his feet disappeared into the water.
“It’s okay, honey. Just like the bath,” Vanessa coaxed.
“See those kids playing in the water?” Alex pointed to a mother with three small children not too far away. They were tossing a Frisbee, leaping and screeching. Stock still, Bo watched, but his hold on Alex's hand tightened.
“Not too deep now,” Vanessa cautioned.
“See the minnows.” Alex pointed into the shallow water. Bo's brow furrowed as he tried to follow the darting fish that looked like shadows. After scooping a flat stone from the sandy bottom, Alex skipped it over the water, loving the amazement on Bo’s f
ace. The rock splashed as it hit three waves in succession and then disappeared.
Vanessa laughed and handed Bo another rock, which he promptly plunked into the water. From then on, he spent a lot of time looking for stones. The day felt so natural.
Having a family had never been a priority for Alex. His childhood had been full of rules and expectations, not something he wanted to duplicate. Maybe there were different ways to have a family.
Vanessa had pulled her hair back into a ponytail. As she played with her little boy, she looked more like Bo’s older sister, not his mother. He looked at her with adoring eyes.
Meanwhile, Alex was having a hard time. In or out of the water, that blue bikini was pretty damned distracting. He had to remind himself he was redeeming himself today.
Relaxing into the sun, he didn’t check his watch and didn’t take any calls. Business could wait. It had been a long time since he’d had a day like this. The rumble in his stomach took him by surprise. Vanessa had been handing Bo pretzels and juice from her bag, but Alex had been sleeping on the job. By then, the sun was slanting into afternoon mode.
He jumped up. “Why don’t I go up and rustle up some sandwiches? We can have a picnic on the beach.”
“Terrific.” Vanessa settled back on the towel.
“No, no!” Bo cried when Alex started to walk away.
“Hey, honey. Alex will be right back,” Vanessa promised. “Don’t worry.”
With a worried glance in Alex's direction, Bo turned his attention back to his pail and shovel. Alex sprinted up to the house, feeling pretty good. Bo was going to miss him.
Didn’t take him long to throw together some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and grab some chips and drinks. His thoughts were creeping him out. That stranger’s comment. The possibility of being Bo’s father made him nauseous and lightheaded.
No way. Vanessa would have told him.
After packing a cooler, he rummaged through the basement and came across a beach umbrella Kate had brought up for friends. By the time he got back to the beach, Bo had fallen asleep, sprawled out on his stomach. Vanessa was trying to shade him from the sun with one of the beach towels.
“He punked out,” she whispered.
Alex set up the huge blue and white umbrella, sinking the poles deep in the sand and anchoring the side flaps. Then he plunked down and opened the cooler.
“Thanks,” Vanessa said, grabbing a pop and holding the cold can to her forehead.
“Warm?” He was burning up just looking at her.
Her smile tweaked up. “Cooler than I’d be at the bakery, that’s for sure.”
Upending a can of pop, he took a deep gulp. Just no way to keep cool looking at that damn suit. “You look great today.”
She ran one hand over her stomach. “Still a little baby fat.”
“Not that I can see.”
“Thanks, Alex.” The sun beamed at him from her sky blue eyes. “And thanks for inviting us today. Bo’s having such a good time. We don’t have many days like this.”
“Glad you came.”
For a while they just sat there, eating. Sand crunched under his teeth, and he didn’t care. Every once and a while, Vanessa would sigh. The sound feathered across his body like a tempting warm breeze. The day was becoming an exercise in self-restraint. He was almost relieved when Bo woke up.
As the sun slanted across the lake, the three of them took to the water again. Bo tried to toss a Frisbee almost as big as his head. Vanessa seemed a heck of a lot more relaxed than she had been at the bakery. Alex couldn’t remember when he’d had such a perfect day.
“Hey there!” Kate's voice drifted down from the patio.
“Come on down.” He motioned to her.
“Gosh, is it that late?” After checking her phone, Vanessa grabbed her beach bag. “Time we get on the road.”
“Our air conditioning is on the fritz at the office. Thought I'd take off early, and Michael’s working tonight.” Kate tripped down the steps in one of the million suits she kept in his guest room. “Hey, who’s this cutie?”
While Bo regarded Kate with guarded curiosity, Vanessa crammed stuff into her bag. “Bo’s my little boy, Kate. Sorry that we have to run. Alex, do you mind if I take some pop for the road?”
“Help yourself.”
While Vanessa rummaged around in the cooler, Kate squatted on her haunches until she was eye level with Bo. “Do you like the beach?”
“I like it,” he said very seriously, only it sounded like “I yike it.”
Her gaze shifting toward the castle, Kate yelped, “Are you kidding me? Dad always thought you weren’t paying attention when he slaved over those castles.”
“I had help this time. Real help,” he teased. “Not a younger sister who stomped every castle before I got the moat made.”
“Alex is quite a pro,” Vanessa broke in. Shouldering her bag, she hoisted Bo onto one hip. Sure was in a hurry to leave. “We’ve got to get a move on.”
“You’ll just wind up in traffic if you get on the highway now.” Kate worked it with Vanessa, trying to get her to stay. “Besides, I’d like to get to know this little guy better.”
Alex was amazed when Kate put out a hand and Bo grasped her fingers. She looked over to Vanessa. “Michael’s station is having a golf outing in a couple of weeks. Do you play?”
Vanessa tensed. “Yes, but not well.”
Kate shrugged. “Might be a great opportunity for you to make more contacts.”
Alex wasn’t going to let this opportunity pass. “I'd be glad to help you polish up your golf game. Got any time next week?” No more stone-walling him when he called.
“My golf game needs more than just a refresher lesson, Alex.” Bo was kicking her beach bag, and she shifted him to the other hip.
“Not to worry. It's a scramble, so we play best ball.” Kate’s powers of persuasion were working their charm. Vanessa looked torn.
Alex knew which card to play. “This should be a part of your business plan.”
Vanessa looked from Alex to Kate. “I’ll think about it. Thanks for mentioning it, Kate. And thank you for a great day, Alex.” Her tone might be measured, but her cheeks flushed as she turned toward the steps.
Pushing against Vanessa’s chest, Bo struggled to get down. “No, I don’t wanna go home!”
Right behind them, Alex was riveted by Bo’s swirling brown eyes. This was one mad little boy. As her little boy went ballistic, Vanessa kept trudging up the steps. Tough lady.
“Why don't you let me take him?” Without waiting for an answer, Alex lifted the squirming child from her arms. Bo’s cheeks were wet with angry tears, and he was a sandy mess. But he quieted down, studying Alex with serious eyes. After they reached the house, Vanessa hurried off to change while he kept an eye on Bo. When she got back, she was chewing on her bottom lip again.
“Let me carry him out.” The toddler promptly laid his head on Alex’s shoulder, and they started for the parking lot.
Once they reached her car, Vanessa got busy with the carseat. “He'll probably fall asleep on the way home.” Settling Bo into the back, she avoided his eyes. Maybe she was just tired.
“I’ll call about the golf.”
“Sure. Right.”
She’d put something shiny on her lips. God, how he wanted to kiss her. But her body language was screaming hands off. After all, Bo was there. She backed away, arms folded tight against her body and keys in one hand. He felt so helpless while they said their good-byes.
Alex watched her take the graveled drive too fast. Small stones pinged against her car. Seemed like Vanessa was always spinning out of his life.
When he climbed the steps to the patio, Kate was stretched out on a lounge chair next to the pool.
“Cute little guy, isn't he?” He plopped into the chair next to his sister.
Kate regarded him with somber eyes. “Very cute. Now, brother, let's talk.”
~.~
Two hours later, brother and siste
r watched the sunset together. He’d thrown two steaks on the grill. Kate had decided to spend the night. Their discussion had run long and wasn’t full of their usual jokes. Tonight they weren’t talking about the Cubs or her search for a Lake Shore Drive condo. Tonight they’d scanned family photo albums while the pressure on Alex’s chest became almost painful.
“What are you going to do?” she finally asked.
Alex stared out at the dark lake. “Wait.”
“Why in heaven’s name wouldn’t you just ask her about Bo?” Kate just about leapt from her chaise lounge.
“If that is the case, I want her to tell me. What if I am Bo’s father but Vanessa doesn’t know it. What then?” The last words made his head pound.
For a few seconds, his sister fell silent. Just reached for her mug and took another sip of decaf. “I think a woman always knows. But let’s face it. I’ve never been there. What I do know is that you two are good together, but you’re both fighting it. What if she tells you that you are Bo’s father? What then?”
Even in the flickering light of outdoor torches, Alex read the question on her face. He’d seen silent expectation on his father’s face too many times to count. “Oh, no. Not that.”
“What’s so bad about marriage, Alex? Couples do it every day.”
“And that makes it a good thing? Think back, Kate. The silent dinner table. Tension that made you feel like a tank had rolled over you. The list of chores on the refrigerator with either stars or red checks.” He shuddered just thinking about it. “For you and Michael? Maybe. For me? Never in a million years.”
“So you think it has to be like that? You think you can’t make your marriage different than what we knew as kids?”
The question hung on the night air. “I don’t know, Kate. I really don’t know.” Uncertainty rolled into a miserable ball in his stomach.
Chapter 14
Alex was being a butthead, one of Bo’s new words. “Hips back. Bend over,” he barked, while gnats swarmed around her face. The sun beat down relentlessly on the golf range.
Snug in the arc of Alex's body, Vanessa had a hard time keeping her mind on golf.