by Lisa Yee
Before he could pull the trigger, Batgirl leapt into the air, executing a perfect roundhouse kick, knocking the Taser from his hands. It flew across the room, and when it hit the cage holding Beast Boy Batty, the energy walls fizzled as the Taser short-circuited and burned out their generator. Batgirl had successfully disarmed the lasers—but she needed to keep Calculator’s attention off that fact.
“Good one,” the Calculator said, not noticing Beast Boy Batty. He was too focused on reaching for his key chain. “But can you stop this?” He pressed the key chain and a powerful bolt of electricity shot out, missing Batgirl but hitting one of his computers. It sizzled as it blew up.
“Yes, I can!” Batgirl yelled. She raised her arm and shot a small grappling hook and line from her sleeve. It wrapped around the handle of his Taser. When she pressed the retractor, it flew from his hands and into hers.
“Drat! But you still can’t catch me!” the Calculator said, scrambling into a closet that had a trapdoor inside it.
Batgirl followed him, but explosions distracted her as the Calculator pressed the buttons on his sleeves. His room was booby-trapped!
With each step Batgirl took, the Calculator pressed another button. Poison arrows flew at her, but she was able to duck and roll across the floor, like Katana had taught her. When a net dropped from the ceiling, Batgirl leapt to the side, then hugged the net, rolling it up in the process, like Poison Ivy had taught her to do with thick, viney plants. A bright light blinded Batgirl momentarily, until she recalled that Star Sapphire had once told her that mirrors were her best friend. Instantly, Batgirl used the shiny surface of her belt buckle to redirect the light.
With each booby trap thwarted, Batgirl got closer to the Calculator. There was only one button left on his outfit that he hadn’t pressed yet.
“What’s that one?” she asked boldly.
“It will teleport this room and everyone in it into oblivion,” he boasted.
Batgirl felt queasy. Was she really hearing what she thought she was? Would the Calculator be that crazy?
“You’ve perfected a teleporter?” she asked. As far as she knew, the only known functional teleporters were the Boom Tubes, but they were out of commission.
“Sort of,” the Calculator said. “It only goes one way. But that’s not an issue. The entire world thinks you are the cause of the chaos.” He smirked. “And now that the destruction has stopped, everyone will think I was the one who was able to bring you down! Everyone thinks you infected the Internet! No one will think it’s me! And with you not around to defend yourself, well, it will look like Batgirl, daughter of the oh-so-mighty Police Commissioner Gordon, has gone over to the dark side.” The Calculator paused when she gasped at the mention of her father. “Oh dear,” he said with mock seriousness. “What will Daddy think of that?”
“This can’t be happening!” Batgirl cried.
“Oh, but it is,” the Calculator said. “You thought you could outsmart me, but you can’t! I sent the pitiful little bat to monitor your every move, even before I knew you would turn on me. I was trying to figure out if you were a friend or a foe. Then, after you stole the TechTalkTV competition, I knew you were my enemy. You’re just like the kids who mocked me at school. Only you’re worse, because you pretended to like me!”
“But—” Batgirl tried to speak, but the Calculator would not be interrupted.
“When I realized you were just using me to get the glory from the HarleyGrams, I planted a transformative virus into the code we worked on. So the joke’s on you, Batgirl!” he yelled.
Batgirl hesitated. “Noah…,” she began. Her face looked conflicted. She corrected herself. “Calculator, I never meant to use you or to mock you. I’m sorry that you felt we couldn’t be friends. I really wanted to. I thought we could work together. You know, as a team. That’s why I asked you to meet with me at Capes and Cowls Café—to collaborate.”
“Collaborate? Collaborate!” he screamed, his eyes glaring. “Excuse me, but in the interviews about the HarleyGrams, NOT ONCE did I hear about how great I was! It was your chance to tell the world that Noah Kuttler should have won the TechTalkTV prize! You could have told the world I was a genius. Only a genius could have made the HarleyGrams turn from holograms into physical form! But noooooo. No one ever thinks about me. NO ONE! That’s all going to change now. Do you know why? Because the world will know that the Calculator perished trying to save the world from Batgirl. I am going to be known as a hero, and you, Batgirl, will be known as a villain. So, Miss Smarty Pants, what do you have to say about that?”
He smiled and stood tall.
Batgirl looked nervous.
“I have plenty to tell the world about you,” she finally said. A look of calm crossed her face. Batgirl pulled her shoulders back. “I’d like to formally introduce you to my good friend Beast Boy.”
The Calculator’s eyes narrowed when the baby bat turned into Beast Boy before his eyes.
“Hey there, number dude, nice to meet you!” Beast Boy said, holding out his hand. When the Calculator refused to shake it, Beast Boy turned to Batgirl. “Is it my breath?” he asked. “I could use a mint.”
“Calculator,” Batgirl said, “while we were chatting, my friend here was helping me get the evidence Police Commissioner Gordon will need to lock you up. Beast Boy, have you been recording?”
He nodded. “Yep! Here’s the other microchip and camera that you had embedded into me. I turned it on when Noah started talking just like you said he would. It’s been recording the whole time.”
“Good work, Beast Boy,” Batgirl assured him. “I think the rest of our team back at Super Hero High has it covered.” She spoke into her com bracelet. “Supergirl, have you been getting all this?”
“Yes,” Supergirl answered. “We’re in the Bat-Bunker right now. Cyborg is standing by.”
“Good!” Batgirl said. “Cyborg, upload the videos, please.”
“No. NO!!!” the Calculator yelled. His head whipped around and he saw himself on his bank of computer screens, streaming onto the Internet.
Batgirl took out her Batarang and threw it across the room. There was a swoosh as the thin metal cable attached to it wound around and around the Calculator, pinning his arms to his sides.
“You wanted to know who would believe me?” Batgirl asked. “Oh, just the entire world.”
As if on cue, a trio of Supers crashed through the window, sending shards of glass across the room.
“Oops!” Cyborg said. “Sorry.” But he didn’t really look sorry.
“Wowza, and I thought my room was messy,” Harley said, looking around.
“Now that the video of your confession is streaming, we thought you might like some company,” Supergirl said to the Calculator.
“I put it on a loop, so it’s playing over and over again,” Cyborg said, looking pleased. “Every news channel on Earth and beyond has this as their lead story.”
“Happy to see all of you,” Batgirl said. She meant it.
“Yeah, but we got this under control,” Beast Boy said, motioning to the Calculator, who looked like he was having some serious indigestion. He struggled to get free of the Batrope, but it was too strong.
“What’s the status of the world?” Batgirl asked Supergirl.
“Wonder Woman and the rest of the Supers are getting everything back in order,” Supergirl reported. “Your reverse HarleyWhams/HarleyGrams are working.”
“The Internet will be back up and running, one hundred percent, in a few minutes,” Cyborg said confidently. He brought up a Web browser stat site that showed a graph going from red to yellow to green.
Batgirl studied the Calculator’s laptop and shook her head.
“Looks like you had more plans,” she said to him.
“What’s it to you?” he sneered. “I was just about to hit control D for destruction!”
“I can handle this,” Harley said, stepping up.
“Be my guest,” Batgirl said, placing the computer on t
he floor.
With one smooth move, Harley Quinn raised her mallet high in the air, then swung it with all her might.
“HARLEY WHAM!!” she cried as the mallet came down on the laptop.
“Don’t forget those,” Batgirl said, motioning to the row of computers. “They may be programmed to cause more commotion, so it’s best to deactivate them.”
“With pleasure,” Harley said, raising her mallet in the air again.
As Harley video recorded herself demolishing the Calculator’s high-tech equipment, there was a knock on the bedroom door.
Noah’s mom entered and looked around. “What’s all the racket, kids? Oh, my!” she said. “Noah, Police Commissioner Gordon is here to see you.”
Batgirl did not meet her father’s stare and was relieved when he turned his attention to the criminal in the room. “Calculator,” he began, “you are under arrest.”
As the Calculator was led away in handcuffs, Cyborg leaned into Batgirl and said, “I never did like him.”
At least with the Calculator ensconced at Belle Reve Juvenile Detention Center, Batgirl was able to let out a sigh of relief. Harley was happy again. The entire incident was a ratings bonanza, and her video channel had even more viewers than before the HarleyGram/HarleyWham debacle.
“Tell me,” Harley said. The red light on her camera was on. “What is your take on the menace known as the Calculator?”
“He wasn’t always bad,” Batgirl said. “He could have had a bright future. That he used his talents for evil was a waste. It makes me sad.”
“CUT!” Harley shouted. “Sad? Batgirl, I don’t want sad. My viewers want HAPPY! FUN! Gossip! Let’s do it again, okay?”
Batgirl shook her head. “Sorry, Harley,” she said. “I can’t. Not now.”
What she didn’t tell her was not now, not later, and not ever. Batgirl wasn’t about to use the Calculator’s fall just to boost ratings. But that didn’t matter to Harley. Soon enough she had an hourlong special: The Exclusive Harley/HarleyGram/HarleyWham Story, featuring exclusive in-depth interviews with herself.
The response from the capture of the Calculator was overwhelming. Batgirl wasn’t used to the outpouring of thanks from friends and total strangers. Even grumpy Mr. Morris, who had insisted that super heroes should be adult and male, wrote her a fan letter.
“Well, well, if it isn’t Supergirl and her pal Batgirl, Super Hero Internet Saver!” Star Sapphire said.
“Hi,” Supergirl said, waving. “Want to sit with us?”
Batgirl smiled at Star Sapphire, then took a sip of her hot chocolate. It wasn’t as good as her dad’s special Gordon Hot Cocoa recipe, but still it was pretty tasty.
The dining hall was practically empty, except for Miss Martian and Big Barda in the corner eating cookies and laughing over a comic book.
Star Sapphire pulled up a chair. “Just wanted to say congratulations,” she said. “You did really well.”
“With help from you,” Batgirl said knowingly.
“You got that right,” Star Sapphire agreed.
“I’m confused,” Supergirl said. “I don’t remember Star Sapphire being in the Bat-Bunker with us, or at the Calculator’s house when he was captured.”
“Oh, she was with us, all right,” Batgirl said as Star Sapphire polished her ring, pretending like she wasn’t being talked about. It was glowing purple. “Remember the anonymous benefactor who helped fund my additional tech?”
Supergirl nodded.
Star Sapphire waved her ring in front of her. “You’re looking at the donor,” she said, offering a sweet smile.
“You?” Supergirl said.
“Everyone knew Batgirl wanted to bring her B.A.T. equipment up to par with the rest of the tech world—and then make it even better. And since I’m always looking for prudent investments, I was merely investing in the future. I expect big returns someday. I plan on starting my own tech enterprise after college. Maybe Batgirl will be my first employee.”
“I’m not so sure of that,” Batgirl said. “But I am grateful for your funding—and your friendship.”
“Don’t confuse business with friendship, Batgirl,” Sapphire said. “Just remember you owe me.”
But her smile seemed genuine as she gave Batgirl a playful wink and walked away.
“Evil has a long memory,” Katana said as she and Batgirl practiced martial arts in the garden. Nearby, Poison Ivy coaxed some bashful flowers to bloom. “Now that you’re famous, there are people who are going to come after you for the sport of it.”
Batgirl grimaced.
“It’s an occupational hazard,” Katana continued. “For example, my grandmother was one of the world’s first female super hero samurai warriors. But even though she’s no longer with us, her enemies are mine.”
Before Batgirl could ask her about this, she noticed Supergirl and Wonder Woman flying toward her. All her super hero friends were with them, and Harley was taping as they circled her.
Katana reached into a black bag. “This is for you,” she said. “Now your costume is complete.”
Batgirl looked down, speechless. The yellow silhouette of a bat embroidered on cloth was simple yet powerful.
“It’s your logo,” Cyborg said, beaming.
“I’ll sew it on later,” Katana said. “But some others here have something to say to you.”
Poison Ivy stepped up, flanked by The Flash and Hawkgirl. “Will you join us? We’d love to have you as a member of the Junior Detective Society!”
Batgirl felt a wave of happiness wash over her. “I’d be honored!” she said as they closed in for a group hug.
For the longest time, Batgirl had thought that going solo was the only way to go. She had felt safe and content alone in her Bat-Bunker. But saving the world and thwarting Calculator had been a true team effort. It felt so nice to belong.
That night, back in the Bat-Bunker, Batty was flying around, bigger and stronger than ever before.
“It’s wrong to keep her cooped up here,” Batgirl told Beast Boy.
He nodded. “I know,” he said sadly.
“Come here, Batty,” Batgirl said warmly. The bat dutifully flew to her. “You’re not a little baby anymore. There’s nothing more I can do for you, but that doesn’t diminish all you’ve done for me.”
The moon was bright over Super Hero High. Together Beast Boy and Batgirl climbed to the top of the Amethyst Tower, which shone brightly, welcoming all to Super Hero High. But tonight someone was leaving.
Batgirl kissed Batty softly on the nose; then Beast Boy did the same. Without a word, Batgirl released Batty. It was a bittersweet moment as she watched the solitary figure, silhouetted by the moon, fly away. Batgirl wiped away a tear, then another one.
“You took great care of her,” Beast Boy said, pretending that he wasn’t crying, too. “Batty is never going to forget that. A true friend is a friend for life.”
The two were silent as they looked up into the night sky. There was no sign of Batty anywhere. As they began their descent, Batgirl felt a slight breeze brush her. She looked up. It was Batty playfully circling around her.
“Oh, Batty,” Batgirl said lovingly.
She stopped as she watched the little bat fly away one last time. The pain she felt was aching, but Batgirl knew in her heart that it was time for Batty to take flight and make a life for herself.
It seemed like a lifetime ago, but it had only been two days since the Calculator was arrested and Batty had flown away. Batgirl was loving every moment of being back at school. With the weekend coming up, her father would expect her home—for the talk.
As she sat in the assembly, Batgirl glanced around the room. Parasite smiled at her before he remembered to be grumpy. She smiled back and nodded to him, then observed her fellow Supers. Batgirl was going to miss them more than any of them could ever imagine. But a deal was a deal, and Batgirl had broken her part of the deal. She had put herself in harm’s way, and her father had the right to pull her out of Sup
er Hero High.
Batgirl looked at the stage, where the teachers were sitting. It was the first time she had seen Commissioner Gordon since he had arrested the Calculator.
“And now for the Hero of the Month,” Principal Waller was saying to the packed auditorium.
Supergirl nudged Batgirl. “No way,” Batgirl said.
“Will Batgirl please join me onstage?” The Wall called out.
“See!” Supergirl said, leaping up and leading the applause. Star Sapphire was smiling, too. She even nudged Cheetah, who rolled her eyes and then clapped her hands.
Stunned, Batgirl made her way up to the stage.
Big Barda gave her a high five and a genuine smile.
Principal Waller began, “This super hero hasn’t been with us officially as a student for long, but in a short time, she has proven herself….”
There was a murmur from the crowd as someone took the mike from the principal. “Excuse me,” Police Commissioner Gordon said. “I have something to say.” He spoke to the principal, but Batgirl couldn’t hear what they were saying. She braced for the worst.
Finally, Principal Waller stepped back. “I know this is highly unorthodox,” Commissioner Gordon began. Batgirl had never seen her father look so serious. “However, Principal Waller has given me the approval to present the Hero of the Month Award. This recognition goes to someone I underestimated and who taught me that there is a time and place to let go and see what a person is made of.” He turned to his daughter. “It is with the utmost pride and honor that I name you Super Hero High School’s latest Hero of the Month.”
As the crowd roared, Batgirl hugged her father.
“Your letter made a lot of sense,” he said. “I should have been listening to you, when instead I was busy lecturing you. It’s been hard for me…but I’ve been purposely keeping my distance…so you’d know that I trusted you. At least, that’s what I was trying to do.”