“Uh oh.” Erika looked at her intently.
“What?” Tish was still half asleep and wasn’t really paying attention.
“It looks like that doughnut tastes like your feelings.” Erika hadn’t stopped watching Alex, “What happened?”
Alex chewed slower before swallowing, “It’s probably nothing.” She looked down at her phone which still hadn’t buzzed. Erika looked at her pointedly. Alex sighed in exasperation. “I texted Liam, and he hasn’t texted me back yet.” Alex grudgingly took another bite of doughnut, “But to be fair, it hasn’t even been a full hour yet.”
“Did you bang him?” Erika rested her arms on the table.
“Erika!” Alex hissed at her. Erika’s voice had been louder than Alex was comfortable with.
“I’ll take that as a ‘yes.’” Erika shook her head. “Look, I know you probably really like him, but he’s Liam. He eats little girls like you for breakfast.” She smiled sarcastically, “Literally and figuratively. But I’m sure you know all about that.” Erika’s tone was harsh, “If he’s already gotten what he wants, why would he text you back?”
“He’s not like that.” Alex’s appetite was gone. More quietly she whispered, “He wouldn’t do that to me.”
“Well, I guess we’ll see.” Erika took a sip of orange juice.
“I think I’m done.” Alex picked up her tray. “I’m going to head back to the room.”
“Don’t be such a bitch.” Alex overheard Tish reprimanding Erika as she walked away.
Worry began to bubble up inside of her as she walked back to her room. Erika’s words grated against her. Alex tried to convince herself that Liam really did like her. He honestly seemed like he cared. He was the one who suggested the date, and that was after they had sex. If all he wanted was that, he wouldn’t have taken her out or been so nice afterward. She hung onto that hope as long as she could. Erika’s words kept swirling around her mind, and as more time passed Alex began to believe her. She kept checking her phone what seemed like every five minutes. The day slowly sifted by, one moment of uncertainty melted into the next. Alex tried to focus on homework, but she wasn’t retaining anything. The clock on her phone said it was nine at night. She was tired of wallowing. The sadness and self-pity swelled upsurged in sudden anger. Alex grabbed her keys and stormed out to her car. She drove to Liam’s apartment. Alex got out of her car and pounded on the door. She heard some shuffling inside. The door handle turned slowly.
All of Alex’s anger melted away. Liam’s eyes were bloodshot. He had dark circles under his eyes, and he hadn’t shaved today. “What happened?” Alex reached up and touched his cheek, “Are you ok?”
Liam shook his head no and gestured for her to come inside. He rubbed his hands against his eyes, “It’s…it’s hard to say the words. It makes it more real.”
“Makes what more real?” She closed the door behind her. There weren’t any lights on in the apartment.
Liam choked on the words as he tried to speak, “Lainey didn’t make it home last night.”
“What? What happened?” Alex’s heartbeat skipped a beat as she waited for his answer.
“They found her car totaled near the high school football field.” Tears fell slowly down his face as he talked. His knees buckled under him. Alex knelt down next to him. “Jen was driving her car. They found used needles in the floorboard.” His shoulders heaved with grief, “They…they said both of them were dead at the scene.” Liam punched the floor with his fist.
Alex touched his arm gently. She pulled him into a hug as he fought between anger and despair. Alex stroked his hair as he cried into her shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me?” She whispered next to his ear. “Why did you think you had to go through this on your own?”
“Didn’t want you to see me this way.” He pulled away from her, ashamed.
“Hey,” Alex held his head in her hands, “you’re human.” Liam tried to turn away from her, but she wouldn’t let him. “You don’t have to be strong all the time. And you don’t have to go through this alone.”
Sobs racked his body. Alex held him until he calmed down. “Thank you.” Liam took her hand in his. He looked into her eyes, “Will you stay with me tonight?”
“Of course.” Alex kissed his cheek softly and squeezed his hand. She had let herself get carried away again without knowing the full story. She let the self-doubt get into her head and make her think such awful things about Liam when the whole time he had been over here hurting and alone.
Liam led her into his bedroom, “Do you care if we watch some T.V.? It’s been at least a little bit of a distraction from everything.”
“That’s fine. Whatever you need.” Alex crawled into his bed as he turned the volume up on the show he was watching. “Have you eaten today?”
Liam stared into space for a moment, “No, I guess I forgot to.” He let out a sigh.
“How about I order some Chinese food?” Liam nodded quietly as she looked up the number for the local Chinese place. She ordered a little bit of everything and gave them the address to deliver to.
Alex stroked his hair while the T.V. cast a mixture of light and shadow across the room. She felt terrible that she had doubted him, again. So far he had given her no reason not to trust him. Everyone thought he was some kind of player, but she was getting to know the real him. He was nothing like what his reputation made him out to be.
There was a knock on the door. “I’ll be right back,” Alex reassured him as she slid off the edge of the bed and went to get the food. She came back with a bag of Chinese food and handed him a container of noodles. “Eat.”
Liam smiled weakly, “Thank you.” He twirled the noodles around a pair of chopsticks, “You didn’t have to do this, you know.” He chewed slowly as he looked at her face.
“You helped me. Now, it’s my turn to help you.” She crawled back into bed and let her knee touch his as she opened up a container of wontons. The physical contact was a comfort for them both.
“I’m glad you came by.”
Alex looked over and quoted him from earlier, “Anytime.”
The two of them ate and watched mind-numbing television. They fell asleep together with the T.V. as background noise. As Alex dozed off, Liam pulled her closer in his sleep. She could feel his breath through her hair. It was warm and comforting. She scooted herself back so that she was closer to him. His arms made her feel safe. Alex drifted to sleep as her breathing synced with his. Her dreams were peaceful as she slept.
Chapter 6: More Important Things
Alex’s alarm blared through her dreams and pulled her back to consciousness. She fumbled through Liam’s comforter, trying to find it. Pillows and blankets were lumped together. Liam bolted upright. The noise had startled him back to his reality of grief and loss. Alex finally found her phone on the floor next to a half-eaten container of fried rice. She silenced it and the other two alarms she used as backups. She tossed her phone to the floor again.
Liam looked at her as she laid back down in his bed. “Are you not going to class?”
She reached over and pulled him down next to her, “Some things are more important than class.” She stared up the ceiling. The ceiling fan’s constant movement made the glass globes clink softly. “I wouldn’t want to be alone if something like that happened to me.”
“Thank you.” Liam’s voice was so soft she barely heard it. He leaned over and rested his lips against hers. His kisses were soft and caring. Alex could feel his desire for closeness and acceptance. She could feel his walls crumbling down.
Alex felt herself being pulled further down on the bed. Her shirt bunched up underneath her as he eased her down. Her fingers were tangled in his dark, curly hair. Her body moved with his. She felt him slide inside of her. She wanted to be closer to him, even though it seemed impossible. Their bodies pressed together. This time was different than the last. Last time had been about the physical pleasure. This time everything was more spiritual. Every movement, every breath
, every kiss was part of some complex rhythm they knew by instinct.
Liam lost himself inside of her. Her body was an escape from his pain and a reminder that good things did exist, even at the darkest of times. Her warmth flowed into him as he gently pushed and pulled against her like the tide. For once, he felt free. He didn’t have to save face or pretend everything was ok. She had seen him break, and she was here, helping him through it. No one had ever been there for him like that before.
His pace was slow and kind. Alex felt the pleasure deepen as he continued to move on top of her. She closed her eyes to focus on the sensation. She could feel it building inside of her. She heard herself whispering, “Don’t stop.” She didn’t want it to end. Alex wrapped her legs around him to keep him close to her.
The pleasure mounted to perfection as they climaxed at the same time. The euphoria of sharing that moment linked them more than any physical connection ever could. Liam kissed her forehead and brushed her hair away from her face. He rested his head against hers. She couldn’t stop smiling. It was the most incredible thing she had ever experienced.
“I…I think I might be falling in love with you.” Alex’s heart beat against her ribcage. She couldn’t believe she had just said that. She hadn’t planned on it or even consciously thought it until the words were already out of her mouth. She watched his face for any sign of regret or happiness, anything that might give her insight as to what he was thinking.
Liam laid down beside her and cupped her cheek in his hand, “Alex.” She could feel her heart sink. “I’m going through a lot right now.”
“No, it’s fine.” She shook her head, cutting him off, “I shouldn’t have—”
“Just listen.” He stroked her cheek with his thumb, “I’m going through a lot, and I’m afraid that if I tell you ‘I love you’ right now, it will be the grief and hormones talking. And you don’t deserve that.” He kissed her forehead again as tears started to well up in her eyes, “When I tell you that,” Liam smiled at her, “I want you to know that it’s because it’s real and not just because I was vulnerable.” Liam wiped away a tear that slid down her cheek.
Alex nodded and tried to regain her composure, “That’s actually really reasonable.” Her mouth formed a small smile.
“Are you ok with giving me a chance to get to that point?”
Her smile widened, but some traces of sadness still remained in her eyes, “Yes.”
“I’m really grateful that you stayed the night.” Liam let out a slow sigh, “I didn’t realize how much I needed this. Just having someone here has made a big difference.”
“You don’t have to do everything on your own.” Alex played with his hair. She twirled his curls around her fingers.
Liam nodded, “It’s just hard for me to let people in.”
“Well, I’ll make you a deal.” Alex propped herself up on her elbow.
“What’s that?” He looked at her a little suspiciously.
“You keep opening up like this and letting me share in your life, and I promise to keep your secrets and help you through things.” Alex smiled, “Plus I might throw in some orgasms and stuff.” She shrugged.
Liam chuckled and shook his head, “Deal.” He held out his hand, and she shook it.
Liam pulled her close to him and held her. He breathed in the smell of her shampoo. Even with everything crashing down around him, it was nice to have someone on his side. He felt like he was falling in love with her, but he wasn’t ready to say it yet. The fact that she was willing to wait for him to be ready to say it meant a lot to him, too. There was still a lot of pain ahead of him before he would be able to move on from this tragedy, but he was thankful to have found Alex when he did. He couldn’t imagine making it through this without her now.
The two of them lay there in silence, because with some people, silence is enough. Alex felt like she could trust in Liam, and he made her want to be a better person. He made her feel alive. She needed to trust her own judgment and stop being influenced by others. Even though she knew she wasn’t through with this giant transition period in her life, Alex finally felt like with Liam’s help, she was on her way to becoming the woman she wanted to be.
I Will Make You Mine
A College Love Triangle Romance
Serena Silver
I Will Make You Mine
Copyright 2017 by Serena Silver
All rights are reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal.
NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR:
This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to a person, living or dead, actual events, locale or organizations is entirely coincidental.
Warning: Due to mature subject matter, such as explicit sexual situations and coarse language, this story is not suitable for anyone under the age of 18. All sexually active characters in this work are 18 years of age or older, and all acts of a sexual nature are consensual.
Prologue
Lucas Sawyer spent most of the evening not thinking about Ella Scott. In other words, Lucas Sawyer spent most of the evening trying not to think of Ella Scott. He did spend around thirty minutes not thinking of Ella before she came into his vision and his resolve crashed there and then.
Lucas was tall with dark black hair, which much like himself never seemed to cooperate. He was handsome, with a strong jaw and a long, straight nose. He had an easy smile, a crooked grin and an air of arrogance around him though deep in his heart, he was a good person. His tall demeanor was perfect for a basketball player. He had been elected captain while he was a freshman; something that had never happened before in the history of the university. He was also an eloquent writer. His articulate talent for writing combined with his passion for basketball was what made him so alluring to women. That, coupled with his good looks and distant conduct made them swoon over him.
Lucas watched as Ella walked hand in hand with Patrick, their backs retreating as they walked away from where he stood. Ella’s blonde hair swung as she walked. She seemed to be in an intense conversation with her boyfriend. This was the first time he was seeing her in two months. He had been away on holiday with his family and had barely had any contact with her during the holidays. His gaze lingered on her for a moment. Lucas turned away as he brought the cigarette to his lips. Inhaling deeply, he allowed the smoke to engulf him. Instantly feeling better, Lucas started to head towards the ground where he knew his best friend Adam would be waiting.
Meanwhile, Ella Scott wished she was anywhere but where she currently was.
“I love you,” Patrick had said, only minutes earlier, shattering their perfect moment. They were sharing a fantastic kiss before Patrick had pulled away and decided to confess his love for her.
Love. Love was great. Love was fantastic. She certainly liked Patrick a great deal. He was gentle and unassuming. She liked the way his hands rested on her hips when he kissed her. She liked how he had been extremely respectful in front of her parents when they met him in the summer. He was absolutely gorgeous, with smooth brown hair, tender brown eyes and a charming smile that was never used with bad intentions.
She liked Patrick.
She loved someone else (though she did not know it yet).
Ella sighed. “I can’t say that back,” she told him. Patrick had guessed that much when he saw the confusion in her eyes during the thirty seconds between his confession and her reply. “I mean,” Ella pressed on. “You know how I am. I can’t say that back until I’m sure I absolutely mean it. I like you, Patrick and I care about you a lot but until I truly, completely, unconditionally meant it—”
“I understand,” her boyfriend smiled down at her though he looked dejected.
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“We’ve only been together a month,” Ella tried to explain again.
“I know. I was just telling you how I feel. I wasn’t expecting a reciprocal, Ella.”
He kissed the top of her forehead and started to walk again, pulling Ella along. She noticed how quickly he had brushed off the disappointment and moved on. Adding that to his list of admirable qualities, Ella continued to walk with him.
Ella Scott didn’t care much for drama. In fact, she cared so little that she would barely know of any taking place around her had it not been for her best friend Mary Shields, who, contrary to Ella, lived for gossip and drama. Ella’s first instinct was always to roll her eyes and consider it to be childish when people talked about drama as if it was the next NASA discovery of life on Mars. And that is precisely what she did when she walked through the corridors of the Astronomy department of her college and heard of the latest scandal of some poor guy and girl who had no idea they were going to become the topic of discussion the next morning. Patrick had gone off for his classes, leaving Ella to attend to her own.
Meanwhile, Mary Shields had her arms around Stebbins’ neck as they shared a kiss. They had found themselves in a small bathroom in the early hours of the day. Stebbins had accidently turned the tap on a few times, and Mary’s panties seemed to be missing but other than that, the experience was well worth a few bruises. Stebbins grinned at her as he fiddled with his belt. Mary sat on the sink, feeling light-headed and blissful. It was only the first day of classes, and she was already missing them in favor of having sex with her boyfriend (was he even really her boyfriend?). All promises of ditching boys for studying had been forgotten this morning. But Mary still believed she could stay on track. Smiling happily, she exited the bathroom alone (Stebbins had exited a few moments earlier) and headed for her first class.
The Campus Jock: A College Bad Boy Romance Page 13