by J. M. Parry
Kait felt like she'd been punched in the stomach. All of the wonderful feelings that had been running through her body just a moment ago disappeared. They were replaced with guilt and shame that she barely even understood. Why did she act the way she did? Why was she so careless? Was this a side effect of her immortality, or something that ran deeper in her personality that she was just beginning to explore.
“I... I didn't know.”
“It's not your fault,” Spencer replied. He stared at the floor of the hotel room. His body was starting to tremble. Kait could tell that he was still turned on, but that he was unable to go any further, no matter how much his body wanted it. “I shouldn't have...”
Spencer turned away from her. For a moment, she thought he was going to leave. Maybe it was better if he did, but he instead he stepped further into the room. He sat down in one of the chairs near the bed and held his head in his hands. “What have I done?” he muttered.
“Listen, it was a mistake,” Kait said. She approached him, but he seemed to flinch as she grew closer. “I didn't know.”
“But I did,” Spencer replied. “I've never done anything like this before.” He looked up at Kait. “I've never met anyone like you before... The worst part is that I still don't want to stop.”
“If you didn't want to stop, you wouldn't have,” Kait told him. She wasn't sure if that was comforting at all, but she had to say something. He looked like he was near a breakdown. She could barely handle her own emotional instability, let alone his.
Spencer reached into his pocket. He held something in his hand when he withdrew it. It looked like a small, golden cross. He gripped it tightly, holding back tears. “I need to go,” he said. “I need to go to church. I need to talk to her. She'll forgive me. She'll understand.”
“Your... Your wife?” Kait asked.
“No,” Spencer said, standing up. “My pastor. My wife, she would never... She can't know.”
Kait didn't think that Spencer was seeking forgiveness from the right person, but she was glad that he had a plan to deal with his guilt. She still didn't know what she would do about her own. Like he was reading her mind, Spencer had a solution for her:
“You should come with me!” he explained. “Confess to God, and all will be settled. Bear your heart and you will be at peace.”
“I don't know about that,” Kait replied. She understood very little about herself, but she could already tell she wasn't much of a religious woman. Still, she remembered what was written on the inside of her passport: find the Gospels.
Maybe this all was happening for a reason. Maybe everything came together the way it did for this very moment. “Okay,” she said. “What kind of church is it?”
Spencer's eyes lit up. As soon as he started talking about the Ecumenical Church of the Riverfront, it was like he'd already forgotten about the crushing guilt and pain that had overwhelmed him on a few minutes before.
The Ecumenical Church was established almost a decade ago in the heart of downtown St. Louis, but in the intervening years it had spread through the adjacent counties. It was the fastest growing religion in the area, attracting men and women of all faiths, and its modern, liberal philosophy combined with high level of community involvement had been especially popular among those whose faith had lapsed. Spencer himself had been a nonbeliever before his first sermon at the church.
“I guess they're open all hours?” Kait asked, motioning towards the windows. It was dark outside. She hadn't checked the clock, but it couldn't have been earlier than 7:00 PM.
Spencer nodded. “The downtown Cathedral will still be open,” he said. “Let's hurry.”
All of this felt rather ridiculous to Kait, but she felt bad about what happened between them so she tried not to let it show. They returned to Spencer's car and drove to the Cathedral, which was only a couple miles west. It was actually near the hospital where Kait had been sedated earlier in the day. She recognized the building as they approached.
The Ecumenical Church Cathedral was a large, modernist building that seemed to eschew the cloistered, ornate designs of Catholicism for practical open spaces. If not for a the elegant facade—a sloping series of steepled towers topped with a golden cross—Kait might have never guessed that the large, ivory-colored building was a church. It looked more like a small amphitheater.
Kait and Spencer entered through the foyer and passed into the nave, which they found empty except for a young woman sitting at the pews near the front. She had pale blonde hair and wore a simple white dress. Scattered on the bench around her were several stacks of paperwork. She seemed absorbed in the documents until Spencer approached her.
“Pastor Eve?” he said softly. “I am so glad you are here. I need to talk.”
The woman looked up at Spencer. She had light blue eyes that seemed to soothe him as soon as they met his own. “Mr. Smith!” she said. “I am as surprised to see you as you are to see me. What brings you here at this time of night?” She didn't sound angry, or even the slightest bit annoyed that he'd interrupted her work. Merely curious. “Shouldn't you be at home with Gina?”
Gina... That was his wife's name. Kait didn't need to know that.
“It's just like I said,” Spencer replied. “I need to talk to someone. I knew that you are often here. I know that this is not the standard time, and that you are busy, but if you could spare a few moments for a confession that would be even better.”
Eve stood up with a gentle smile. She looked past Spencer and fixed her eyes on Kait. In that instant, something about her mood changed. Her gaze narrowed ever so slightly, and she pursed her lips. Did she know what Spencer wanted to confess already?
“Who is this?” Eve asked.
“Kait Selias,” Kait quickly answered. She didn't want Spencer to introduce her. It felt weird. “I'm just here because...” Her voice trailed off. She still didn't quite know how to finish that statement. The best she could do would be to admit that she was following up on the mysterious scrawled writing in her passport. That would be almost as embarrassing as what Spencer was about to tell her.
“I'm Evangeline Weisz, but most people call me Pastor Eve.” The blonde woman extended her hand. Kait took it and they shook. Eve's hands were smooth, but her grip was surprisingly firm. As she pulled away, Kait noticed that her fingers were trembling. She was trying to hide it, but Eve was nervous about something.
Spencer didn't notice any of this. “Pastor Eve is the founder of the Ecumenical Church,” he said hastily. “But even though she has many other pastors to tend to the congregation, she still makes herself available every weeknight.”
“I do what I can for my flock,” Eve replied.
Kait stared at her. The woman barely looked a day over thirty. If she founded the Church ten years ago... “That is very impressive for someone so young,” Kait said.
Eve chuckled. “Thank you,” she replied. “But I'm older than I look.” She turned her attention to Spencer. “Come back to my office and we can discuss whatever you wish to discuss in private. Kait can have a look around the church if she likes. I assume it's her first time here?”
“I was curious,” Kait said bluntly. She didn't like the way Eve was treating her. Something seemed wrong, but she couldn't put her finger on it.
Spencer and Eve headed for the back of the church, into a door that, presumably, led to Eve's office. As soon as they were gone, Kait started to examine the nave of the church. She was all alone, and there was no one around to tell her what she couldn't do. The first thing she did was take a look at the paperwork lying on the pews. She hoped they were the church's finances, or something else juicy that would hold her interest until they got back. Unfortunately, it was just homework submitted by kids from the church's Sunday school.
Kait didn't have much interest in a bunch of essays on the Book of Mark, so she approached the pulpit. There was a heavy, leather-bound book sitting open on a tall podium. She knew it was a Bible, but she was still curious. After all, that's
where she would find the Gospels.
As she paged through the Bible, it fell open to a highlighted portion. Proverbs 18:20-21: A man's belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth; and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled. Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.
There was something written next to the passage, but it was not in English. Kait squinted to look at it. The writing was different from what she was used to seeing, but she immediately knew what it was: it was the Cyrillic alphabet. This was written in Russian, and the more Kait thought about it, the more she realized that she could read it.
Why could she read Russian as well as English?
Suddenly, Kait was thrown from her thoughts by the sound of a car. It was coming from just outside the church. It wouldn't have worried her if it wasn't so close. Someone was out in the parking lot.
Almost as soon as she noticed it, the car engine went quiet. Kait stepped down from the pulpit and began to walk down through the nave. She heard footsteps from the foyer. And then the doors flew open.
Kait stood between the central rows of pews and stared at the man who entered the church. It was the first face she'd seen in this world, and the one she feared the most: Mayor Daniel Levin.
“I knew you'd pop back up eventually,” he said, casually walking towards Kait. “I didn't expect it would be this soon, but I am thankful for happy accidents.”
Surveying the room, Kait backed away from the mayor. He was alone, but he clearly had a plan for how to subdue her. She thought about those brief moments she could recall in the hospital, just as she began to awake and he put her back under. It was so terrifying to know that she was under his control, and now that she was free... She never wanted to feel that way again.
“I'm not going to let you take me,” Kait shouted, hopefully loud enough that Spencer and Eve could hear. She needed witnesses. “I won't be some science experiment.”
“Science experiment?” Mayor Levin repeated. “You really have no idea what you are talking about. I am truly sorry for what I did to you, but you have to understand that your sudden appearance put us all ill-at-ease. Perhaps we can come to some other sort of understanding and--”
Suddenly, Levin's speech was cut off by a loud shout from behind Kait. “You betrayed me!” Spencer shouted. He and Eve had just emerged from her office. Shaking with rage, he turned on Eve. “You told him that we were here. You told him about Kait! It had to be you!”
Eve took a deep breath. “I did what I had to do, Spencer. It is for the best. Kait is a threat to everything that Daniel and I have built in this city. You know we've made it better, don't you?”
Spencer shook his head. “You and the mayor? You were working together?”
“Of course we were, Spencer,” Eve said. She tried to keep her voice calm, but it wavered as her fear was too much for her. She desperately wanted to defuse the situation. “Nothing we have built would be possible without the assistance of the city government.”
“No,” Spencer said. “It all makes sense now.”
Mayor Levin sighed. He didn't even glance at Spencer and Eve. His gaze remained on Kait, his hazel eyes steady and uncompromising. “You have made things very difficult, Miss Selias,” he said. “You have put us all at risk, and you have left me with no choice about what I must now do.”
The wiry man reached into his gray jacket and pulled out a black pistol. As soon as Kait saw the weapon, she reflexively grabbed for her hip. There was nothing there. Somehow, deep inside her, there was an instinct that her memory loss hadn't repressed. She expected to be armed. Kait didn't have time to consider this, though, as the mayor lifted his gun.
At first, Kait thought he was going to shoot her. She didn't know whether to be afraid or not. It would hurt, just like the fall from the hospital window rattled her frame, but it wasn't anything she couldn't overcome.
Mayor Levin didn't aim the weapon at her. He pointed it at Spencer.
“No!” Eve shouted, but she was too late. Mayor Levin pulled the trigger.
Bang!
Spencer fell to his knees, than collapsed onto his face. Kait didn't look at him long enough to see the blood. She didn't need to look. She knew he was dead. Just like that, he was gone.
It was like being woken from a dream. In the brief hours of Kait's existence, she had failed to understand the depth of existence itself. She'd done nothing but let her curiosity, her fear, and her lust lead her along wherever it might take her. What did it matter? She was indestructible. Nothing could kill her, even when she wanted it to.
Other people were not so strong. It was not a hardy thing, life. It was fragile. It was breakable, smashed to pieces with something as simple as a single bullet. Spencer was gone. One second, he was a breathing, moving, individual. The next, he was gone. Death was real.
“Why did you do that?” Eve sobbed, dropping to her knees to cradle Spencer's body in her arms. “We could have found another way. We could have figured something out.”
“No, we couldn't,” Mayor Levin replied. “You know we can't take any risks.” He looked at Kait. “This is what happens, Miss Selias. This is what happens when you don't understand what is going to around you. Come with me and--”
Anger overwhelmed Kait. She didn't want to hear another word. Maybe Mayor Levin had answers for her. Maybe he could explain what she was, but she didn't want to hear it from him. She didn’t want her existence to be defined by someone so horrible, so uncaring, so indulgent in the fragility of life.
Kait rushed at Mayor Levin. He aimed his gun at her this time, firing two more times. The bullets struck Kait in her chest, but they didn't even knock her off her feet. They burned through her flesh, like sharp pin pricks against her skin, but they couldn't stop her. She was too strong.
Once she was close enough, Kait dived at the mayor. She tackled him, forcing him to the ground. Punching him in the throat, she stopped him from speaking. Then she grabbed the gun from his hands. Without even thinking, she turned it on him. She placed it against his forehead.
“You really do not understand,” he choked out before Kait could pull the trigger.
BANG!
Mayor Levin's glasses shattered with the force of the bullet striking his skull. His eyes rolled back into his head. He went limp.
Kait panicked. She dropped the gun, only now realizing what she had done. She'd killed him. She'd killed the mayor of St. Louis.
Chapter Four
Kait ran as fast and as hard as her legs would let her. She didn't know where she was going. She didn't care. She just had to get away from the church.
The last few minutes were a blur to her. In one moment, she was watching Spencer's lifeless body fall to the ground. In the next, she was avenging him by taking a life of her own. She couldn't even fathom the anger that had come over her and forced her to kill the mayor. The fury had taken control before she could even comprehend it, and she had given in without a second thought.
After running for a minute, Kait felt a discomfort in her side. She pressed her hand to her skin and felt two, small pieces of metal emerge from her ribs. Her body had pushed out the bullets that the mayor shot into her. Kait threw them away and pressed her fingers against the flesh from which they had emerged. It wasn't even broken.
Now she knew the full extent of her immortality. Mere minutes after being shot, her body could repair itself as if the injury had never even happened.
Unfortunately, her clothes were not so indestructible. Her blouse was soaked in blood and torn to shreds beneath her left breast. Even if she could get far away from the church, she would stand out amidst any crowd. It would only be a matter of time before the police picked her up again.
This was all a disaster. She never wanted to hurt anyone, and now two people were dead. She'd lost the one person she could trust, and now she was back where she started. Except now, the entire city was looking for her.
As Kait got further and further
from the church, she saw the police presence in a new light. It seemed like cop cars were on every corner. They were everywhere. Undoubtedly, word of the mayor's murder had reached the police. They were looking for her, and they weren't going to stop until they found her.
Kait didn't know where to go, and she ended up walking back towards St. Louis University Hospital. It was one of the few landmarks she knew it the city, and she hoped that with her bloody shirt she would blend in better among the patients.
A soft drizzle began to fall as she approached the hospital. It soaked her clothes through, and suddenly she became very self conscious about the fact she wasn't wearing a bra. She crossed her arms over her chest, hiding both the curves of her body and the largest of the blood stains.
Once she was in front of the building, Kait thought about how to handle this. Maybe she could sit in the emergency room waiting room for a while, until she had a chance to steal a new shirt or a jacket. By then, maybe the police search would have died down enough for her to walk back to her hotel room. She still had a whole bunch of cash in the briefcase she gave Spencer. Once the sun rose in the morning, she could buy all new clothes and start planning a move to another city.
All of Kait's plans were derailed when someone spotted her. “Kait! You... You came back?”
Kait looked up, towards the entrance of the hospital. Paul Gordon, the resident who helped her escape, was standing near the sliding glass doors.
A deep warmth spread through Kait's face as she realized how awful she looked. She pressed her arms even closer together over her chest. She could feel her hard nipples poking through the wet material of her shirt and she didn't want him to see her so exposed.
“Yeah, some bad things happened,” Kait said as Paul approached her. She didn't know a better way to describe her situation.
Paul looked her over. He noticed the blood before he noticed anything else. “What happened to you?” he asked. “Are you okay?”
“I can survive a lot, it turns out,” Kait replied. “But there are people after me. Cops.”