“Just tell me how you missed it, and I’ll leave you alone,” he said.
“If you promise it'll make you go away, then I’ll explain it to you step by step.”
“Why are you so upset with me?”
“You tried to embarrass me in the Training Ward, and you have the nerve to ask me why I’m upset with you?”
“But you were upset before that. You told me to leave you alone this morning, and then you came to the field challenging me in front of everyone.”
“I wasn’t challenging you. I was practicing, just like I do every day,” she said.
“It certainly felt like a challenge to me.”
“To you? Everything has to be about you, doesn’t it, Caleb?”
“It’s not about me. That’s why I’m here with you right now.”
“Wrong! You are with me so that I can answer your stupid little questions so you can feel better about yourself. You want to make sure that you haven’t done anything wrong, so that you can be clear of any accusations that I might have.” She wiped her sweaty hair from her brow, angrily stuffing more items into her satchel.
“Sarai, it’s not like that.”
“Leave me alone, Caleb.”
She barreled out the door and burst into a sprint. He watched her disappear down the road into the Housing Ward. It would be a full day before he would see her again.
Caleb went back to the training field, and Gardiv was waiting for him. “What was that racket with you and Sarai all about?”
“I don’t know. This morning I talked to her and she told me to leave her alone, then she came out here and you saw what happened.”
“I’m not much on sorting through these types of things. I think I’m going to let you talk to Arthur. You head over there, and I’ll meet you there once I’m done here. And Pioneer Eaves. You and Sarai keep your personal business off the training grounds.”
“Yes, Pioneer Baroq.” Caleb knew that Gardiv was serious. He didn’t want to cross him again. He left the field to find Arthur.
Arthur was sitting in the conference hall of the Housing Ward when Caleb arrived. His aged gaze found Caleb as he walked in. Arthur’s scruffy hair dangled across his face, and he sat in his regular formal posture.
“I need to talk to you about Shauna,” Caleb said.
The wrinkles on Arthur’s forehead bunched together. “Has something happened to her?”
“She’s in trouble. We were making our Spiritualist Emblem Run, and some Polarists grabbed her.”
Confused, Arthur was not sure which question to ask first. “Why were the Polarists in Broughtonhaven, and why was Shauna helping you with an Emblem Run?”
“We went to her because we saw the governor of Valenheid, Raylen Fevin, in the Broughtonhaven caves. Raylen and his soldiers were sealing the caves with some kind of ice barricade.”
“Did you find out why?” Arthur asked.
“We haven’t figured it out yet. But those barricades were also discovered in many of the other caves.”
Arthur seemed puzzled. He peeled the skin away from an orange. The sweet fragrance permeated the room. “And Shauna? Why was she helping?”
“Spiritualist Alpha Yael wanted us to look at the caves with Shauna, and that’s when the Polarists grabbed her.”
“Did they hurt her?” he asked. There was more behind the question than the words themselves. A hint of vengeance crossed his expression, leaving as quickly as it had come.
“Not from what I could tell, but everything happened so fast. I just hope she’s alright,” Caleb said.
“For their sake, I hope the same.”
Caleb had never heard the edgier side of Arthur before. There was a bent of wrath that somehow crept in and faded away. It reminded Caleb that Arthur was just a man. Even in his humanity, he still appeared in command, his wrath being more controlled and directed rather than spastic and sporadic like rage.
“I take it Gardiv sent you here,” Arthur said.
“He did.”
“So then, what is it that concerns you at this moment?”
The light from the sun settled in the room between the vertical cracks in the wooden cabin. The candles illuminated their faces as the flames shifted from side to side. Arthur bit into the fruit, and the juices poured down his chin. Gardiv entered, mistakingly slamming the door behind him.
“I haven’t done anything,” Caleb said.
“Maybe that’s why you’re here. You know,” he said, taking another bite of his orange, “sometimes doing nothing is the worse thing that you could ever do. What if you had done nothing when Wex tried to destroy the Alpha Council? Who else would have had the strength to step in like you did?”
“Someone would have.”
“Maybe. But what if no one would have? One man would have wiped out the entire Naturalist military as well as the other provinces. So I will ask you again. Why did Gardiv send you here?”
Caleb ran his hand through his hair, then interlocked his fingers on the table, looking around and trying to find an answer that would satisfy Arthur.
“It was because Sarai accused him of being selfish, and I wanted to see what you thought,” Gardiv replied.
“What did you do?” Arthur asked.
Caleb explained the situation from that morning, and then he told Arthur what happened on the training grounds. He also told him how he ran after Sarai, so that he could make the day trek with her.
Arthur wiped his sticky hands on his woolen robe, and with his bony fingers, he brushed off the table. “So you tell Sarai about your deceased wife and you follow that story with a kiss? Then you go to the training grounds and show her that you can outmatch her? And now, here you are with me, wondering why she is upset with you?”
Caleb sat back in his chair with a hidden grin. He knew what Arthur was going to say, and just hearing Arthur repeat his actions showed him how selfish he had been. “You’re right,” he said.
Arthur rubbed his chin briefly, placed his elbow on the table, and pointed at Caleb. “Your problem is that you did not consider her first.”
Arthur pushed his seat back and headed towards the door. Gardiv ran over to help him, but Arthur waved him off, not needing any assistance.
“What are we going to do about Shauna?” Caleb asked before Arthur left the conference hall.
Arthur sighed, trying not to let the distress of his granddaughter show on his face. “We’ll get to that.”
When Caleb stepped outside, two physicians walked up to Gardiv. The man’s slender frame and the woman’s petite figure were not designed for war, but their research and their medical contributions had saved so many Pioneers’ lives.
“Gardiv, we just came to tell you thanks for all you’ve done for us,” said the man.
“It’s certainly a pleasure serving my people,” Gardiv replied.
“If you need anything, you just let us know, and we won’t hesitate to help,” the woman said.
Caleb rushed to the Training Ward entrance where the carriages were. He grabbed one from the guard and journeyed to the opposite direction that Sarai had headed, hoping to reconnect with her on the other side of Juten.
=====
The trip was long, and the daylight faded. The continual fire line that ran around the city wall brightened the Housing Ward. The constant clocking of the horse's trots usually soothed him. But with Sarai on his mind, the sound had become an aggravating tapping.
What would she say? Would she be happy to see him? Would she be hoping that he would come, or would she hate him even more? He didn’t know what to expect, but he rode through the muddy gravel, waiting for the silhouette of a tired and exhausted woman to appear through the darkness.
He felt sick. He shouldn’t have mistreated her, but he wasn’t sure why she was so upset. It just didn’t make sense. He thought that she wanted the kiss as much as he did. He hadn’t wanted to show her up in the Training Ward, but she came on the field, and the recruits were cheering. It didn’t matter. He w
as going to do something out of the ordinary. This time, he was going to be the one to make things right. This time he was going to show her that she was worth it, no matter what it took.
There were sixteen entrances to the Training Ward from the Housing Ward around the island, and Caleb wanted to return his carriage and walk the rest of the way. He handed the horses over to the watchmen and started off on foot. Sarai could’t be too far away.
The night persisted, and the breeze showered in from above, bringing with it the fresh smell of the salt water from the sea. He rarely traveled to this side of the island unless he was making the day trek himself, but the people were equally as cordial. Some Pioneers, off in the distance, were laughing and singing. The nightly festivities had begun.
From afar, his eyes captured a woman running with excellent form. Her strides were on pace, and her breathing the same. He ran to her, knowing that it must have been Sarai. Her quiver shook silently on her back with each step. She never compromised speed for stealth, not even in her training. It was as if the arrows knew not to disobey her by making a sound.
“Sarai,” he called, as he approached her.
She did not respond. He stood still, and she ran right past him with the moonlight glistening off her golden skin. She had braided her hair some time during the run, and he hoped that she would let it stay like that. It made her even more appealing than before.
How could he not have noticed her until now? She was always gorgeous. She was always radiant. She was always dashing. But tonight. This night. She was breathtaking. Maybe it was the way that she fought against him. Or maybe it was just because of who she was. Regardless, she was getting away, and he had to catch up.
He raced after her as quickly as his heart had pounded inside of him when he had kissed her. His footsteps were louder than hers, his form less poised. But he was going to win her back, if indeed he had ever lost her.
“Sarai!” he said, slowing to her pace, once he caught up with her. Now he was grateful for the breeze. It cooled him off from above.
“Didn’t I advise you to leave me alone?” Her words were stern, and her voice was sharp.
“Since when did I start taking your advice?” he asked, trying to smooth over the moment.
“That’s a good question. Hm...how about never?” She wasn’t being sarcastic this time.
“Sarai, that’s not true. I always listen to you. It just may take me longer to accept it, but once I do, I always hold fast to whatever it was.”
“Why did you come here? I told you that I didn’t want you to run with me.”
“But I always run with you.”
“For what? So you can feel better about yourself? So you can feel like you helped?”
“You’re right, Sarai. It was for me. But every time, it was because I cared.”
“I know you care. You care about yourself. That’s all you ever care about.”
“How can you even say that?” he asked.
“Whatever you feel like doing, you do it. Forget about how it makes me or anyone else feel. It’s about you, and it always has been.”
“That’s just not right.”
“I told you to leave me alone, but you came anyway. And why? Not because you cared that I wanted to be left alone. No, you came so that you could feel better about our conversation. So that you could sleep at night.”
“You don’t want to talk about this?”
“No! How many times do I have to say it?”
“Fine. Then we won’t talk about it. Even though I have a lot to say, I will keep it to myself to show you that I am not as selfish as you think.”
“Just go, and leave me alone.”
“No. We’re going to finish this together...like we always do.”
After the run, Caleb was exhausted — even more so than Sarai. He couldn’t stop drinking the water from the irrigation pipe in his house. He didn’t bring along the necessary supplies for the run, and he didn’t dare ask Sarai for any of hers. Also, she didn’t offer. He threw himself on his bed and in a moment, he fell asleep.
=====
He woke up after a few hours, not being able to sleep much during the day. He would certainly pay for it tonight. It was well into the afternoon, and he could’t stop thinking about his conversation with Sarai. He went to her house, wanting to understand what had happened the day before.
She was sitting on her porch sharpening her knife with a stone. Her hair was still braided, just like he had hoped. She saw him walking up to her, and she forced a wearied smile. Caleb didn’t know what to think. The day before, she wouldn’t even talk to him, and now she seemed to be more approachable.
“Don’t say anything,” she said. “I owe you an apology.” She exhaled and stopped sharpening her blade. She leaned back and braced herself on her palms, her braid swinging loosely to the porch.
“What was going on yesterday?”
“I was being too hard on you. I know that you still have feelings for your wife, and I just felt like it was selfish of you to use me to get over those feelings. I can’t let you do that to me.”
“I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
“No you shouldn’t have. But I could have been a lot nicer to you afterwards,” she said.
He put one foot on the porch near her and ran his fingers through his hair. His chest throbbed, as the tension within swelled. “Did you like it?” he asked.
She squinted at him; at first, she wasn’t sure what he is referring to. “You mean the kiss?”
He nodded innocently, not trying to seem embarrassed, but his uneasy mannerisms showed his discomfort.
She leaned forward with her elbows on her knees, and she went back to sharpening her knife. “No.”
Caleb was sure that his heart had stopped. Her words were too harsh. The feeling was too foreign. The rejection was too stiff. How could he have been so foolish? Why did he think that she would wait for him to make up his mind about whether or not he wanted to move on?
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done it,” he said as he fumbled over the words. He wasn’t sorry. He just needed to say that he was, hoping that she would tell him something that felt promising – some kind of indication that she enjoyed the kiss as much as he did.
“Don’t worry about it. We all make mistakes,” she said. “But Caleb. Please don’t let that mistake happen again.” She didn’t pay attention to his bruised heart, and she kept tending to her blade, blowing off the accumulated metallic particles and polishing it on her pants. She changed the subject to ease the tension between the two of them. “You were right about one thing though.”
“What’s that?” he asked. He cleared his throat to help him speak more plainly. He had not gotten over her rejection. He could’t get past her command of not wanting him to ever kiss her again. Since their lips had touched, that’s all that he’s been able to think about, but she didn’t feel the same way. “What was I right about?” he asked with more clarity in his tone.
“The shot I missed,” she said, polishing the blade, “it was an easy shot. I missed it on purpose.”
Now his voice had fully come back to him. “No way! I saw you stumble, and you even slammed your bow down, and you yelled at Gardiv. It’s fine if you miss shots. We all do, but there’s no reason to lie about it.” He was being harsher than he needed to be. He needed to punish her somehow for her rejection of him, and this is how he would do it.
“It was all a show. Just like the show you were putting on for the new recruits.”
“I don’t believe that,” he said as he waved her off. “Just admit that I’m a better shot than you.”
“You’re a better shot than me. I don’t doubt that. But that doesn’t mean that I missed the shot unintentionally. You wanted the recruits’ praise. I didn’t. And just know this: as good as you are, even you can miss shots.”
He wasn’t going to let her off that easily, especially not after that last comment. “Then why did you come to the archer line first? Why not start a
t another training station? And why did you feel the need to show off?” he asked.
“When have I not gone to the archer line first during my training? And when do I not challenge myself when I am on the line? I don’t care about missing shots, because I know that missing them here,” she said pointing to the ground, “only means that I will be better prepared for over there.” She pointed west towards Clydenholm.
“Let’s say that it was intentional, which I still don’t believe. Why not just hit the target in an unimpressive way? Why take the day trip around the island? That’s the part that doesn’t make sense.”
The wind blew in from above, even though the sun set behind the great stone wall. What little light was left from the rays brightened Sarai’s face, though her gaze was stale and firm. She shrugged.
“What is it?” he asked. “Tell me why you decided to run?”
“Because I didn’t want to be around you. I didn’t want you moseying up to my house and asking all these questions. I just didn’t want you bothering me. I would have rather run around the island than to listen to that. But for some reason, you decided to meet on the other side.”
Caleb was speechless. He had rarely seen this abrasive side of Sarai before. She was usually more compassionate. She usually seemed to get over grudges a lot more quickly, but something about this last argument must have tipped her over the edge.
“Why are you being like this?” he asked.
“Because I didn’t want you to kiss me. I felt violated. It was rude and disgusting. That’s why. We can fight together. You make a great partner. But we cannot be together.”
“But what if I don’t want to go to the mainland with you anymore?”
“You don’t have a choice. You know that. I’m your trainer. And as long as I am training you, you’re stuck with me.”
Caleb scraped the sole of his foot on the side of the porch and ran his fingers through his hair. “That’s the worse news that I’ve heard in a long time,” he said as he walked away.
CHAPTER 5
THE MISGUIDED COUNCIL
Infused (Book 2 of The Pioneers Saga) Page 5