by Jillian Dodd
And I can see why it's preparing.
Even as much as I've enjoyed being pregnant with you, I'm starting to get a bit uncomfortable.
And we still have six weeks left to go.
I'd tell you to stop growing, but that wouldn't be very motherly of me.
But I would like to request that you stop kicking my bladder.
Yesterday when you kicked me, I thought I was going to pee my pants.
This is me using my stern voice. "Baby Mac, the bladder is off limits."
August 23rd
You go, girl.
"No. Just stop!" Phillip says, waking me up.
I wonder who he's talking to but quickly realize he's dreaming. I push on his shoulder. "What are you dreaming about?"
"We got stuck in a snowstorm and I had to deliver the baby myself. Which, impressively, I did."
"Well that's good, except you were yelling to stop."
"Yeah, that's because once I delivered the first baby, they just kept coming."
"Kept coming?"
"Yeah, one baby after another. Like when you're in a batting cage and the machine keeps pitching. The babies kept coming and coming."
"You've seen the ultrasounds, Phillip. There's only one baby," I tease.
"I know. It was crazy. Have you packed a bag for the hospital yet?"
"Not yet, but I'm pretty sure we won't have a snow storm on the first of October."
"Still, I just would feel better if we were prepared. We finished our birthing class a couple weeks ago and we don't have that done or a birthing plan."
"My birthing plan is simple. Just six words long. I'll have the epidural now, please. Do you need me to write that down so you'll remember it?"
"Probably not," he laughs. "I'm supposed to go lift with Danny this morning. He's back home from training camp for a couple days since the second preseason game is tomorrow night. I decided I'm taking the gnome with me."
"Where are you going to hide it this time?"
"I'm not sure, but I'll think of something."
When he gets back from working out, he's talking to me from the bathroom while he's shaving. "So Danny wants us to come over for dinner tonight. He said he's grilling steaks."
"That sounds good. Does Lori know he invited us?"
"I didn't ask."
"Probably for the best. Where did you put the gnome?"
"In his beer fridge on the deck. If we're lucky, we'll get to see him find it."
The dog days of summer are officially here. Even Angel doesn't want to be outside for very long.
I've been feeling pretty good but, lately, the heat has been getting to me more than it used to.
Thankfully, as we trod up the stairs to Lori and Danny's deck, the breeze has picked up, giving us a reprieve.
"Hey," Lori says to us.
"I brought some brownies," I tell her, setting them on the patio table, hoping that will ease the tension. We haven't really talked since the formula incident. And if it weren't for the fact that we've only seen Danny once since training camp started a couple weeks ago, I wouldn't be here.
"I can't eat those," she immediately says. "I'm on a very strict diet."
"How come?"
"So I can get back to my pre-baby weight," she says, like I'm an idiot.
"I figured that. I just read that when you nurse, you aren't supposed to diet."
"I'm still consuming plenty of food, it's just the right kind of food. Lots of fruits and vegetables. Lots of water. Danny got me a personal trainer and nutritionist."
"That was nice of him," Phillip says, squeezing my hand. I know what the squeeze means.
More brownies for us.
Lori smiles. It's pretty much the first smile she's thrown my way since--I can't even remember.
"He comes highly recommended by our team trainer, so hopefully it's not a waste of money," Danny interjects, joining us on the deck with Devaney in his arms. "Lori, would you mind grabbing me and Phillip a beer?"
Phillip and I look at each other in a panic, suddenly remembering the gnome. We both go, "Wai--"
"Ahhhhh!! What the hell!?" Lori screams. She grabs the gnome and throws it at Phillip. Thankfully, he's quick-handed and catches it. "Why am I the only adult here?"
Danny and I bust out laughing.
"Stop laughing! I'm serious! It's a stupid, ugly gnome that you keep hiding to try to scare each other. It's childish. Are you ever going to grow up?"
Danny can't stop laughing. "Lori, you should've seen the look on your face. Priceless."
"It's not fucking funny!" she yells.
Devaney smiles at Danny then laughs.
"Ohmigosh! Did you see that? Devaney is laughing too!" I burst out.
"Even you think the gnome is funny, don't you, little monkey?" Danny says, tickling her chin.
"We're not hiding the gnome, Lori. It's been moving of it's own accord," Phillip manages to say with a straight face.
"You're all nuts," she says, stomping into the house.
"That didn't go over so well," Phillip says to Danny.
"Mommy needs to learn to take a joke, doesn't she?" Devaney moves her hands around, touching Danny's face. He grabs her finger in his mouth and shakes it, causing her to squeal with delight. "She loves it when I do that. You think your daddy is hilarious, don't you?" he says, never taking his eyes off his baby girl.
We watch him play with her for a few minutes.
I can't wait until Phillip makes our baby laugh like that.
Chelsea sent me a link to a social media account the other day along with a text that said her ovaries just exploded. The account contains pictures of hot guys holding babies. I'll admit, there is something pretty sexy about seeing a man holding a baby. I can only imagine how sexy it will be when he's holding our baby.
Apparently, Lori wasn't too traumatized by the gnome, because she brings steaks and corn on the cob out on a platter. Danny hands Devaney to her and puts them on the grill.
"Are you excited for your second preseason game?" I ask him.
"It's good to be playing again but, like last week, I'll only be in for a little while. My backup needs experience and they don't want me to get hurt. I saw workers at your house. What are you doing over there?"
"I'm building JJ an office slash playroom," Phillip says proudly. I love that he's gotten so excited about it. He even helped me pick out cabinets.
"We thought it would be easier once we have kids for me to work from home. Did I tell you I'm working on another building? This is a smaller project and I'm only doing the interior space planning, but it will be fun."
"You didn't tell us," Danny says, flipping the steaks.
"Phillip's company is expanding again, so they are adding an office in Dallas. I also have another job working with our contractor. He has a client who is consolidating with a new campus here. It will be a huge project."
"That's awesome," Danny says. "You go, girl."
I smile. "Thanks."
"How in the world are you going to work with kids running around?" Lori snarls.
"Because she's brilliant." Phillip grins. "We split up the big room in the basement that I was going to use as a home theater. The part that's her office has a set of French doors leading into the playroom and instead of walls, there are half-walls with windows that slide open."
"It makes my office look like a sunroom. There's lots of light and we had it painted this gorgeous shade of pale pink. The construction is done, now they are just installing the cabinets. I did a long run across one wall. It will be cool because when we want to have parties in the backyard, it can double as a buffet. And my drafting table is like a murphy bed. I can fold it inside a cabinet when it's not in use. Since it has it's own entrance, I'll even be able to have clients over, if need be."
Lori laughs. "That'll look professional. Toys scattered all over."
"The French doors and windows that face the playroom have curtains, so I can hide the clutter. Anything is possible with a little cre
ativity." I give her a tight-lipped smile.
"On that note," Danny says, "time to eat."
CHAPTER TWENTY
Dear Baby Mac,
Only five more weeks until we get to meet you!!
You have no idea how excited I am about that.
And I'm not just saying that because my stomach feels like it weighs about eight hundred pounds and might explode if it gets any bigger.
In reality, you are only weighing in at about 5 lbs. and feeling cramped too. You probably can't do all the fun flips and summersaults like you used to.
But come this Saturday, we'll have something to cheer about!
IT'S FOOTBALL SEASON!
This Saturday is the home opener for our alma mater and favorite college team, Nebraska. Our friend, Danny, who will be your godfather, is a quarterback in the NFL and used to play there. He got a skybox that we get to watch the games from, which will be really nice.
Even though I'm feeling a little uncomfortable at times, I'm still trying to enjoy every moment of my pregnancy.
I read something around the time that my parents died that said, When you're stuck in a moment, it can be hard to see past it.
That all you can see is that moment.
But I'm trying to look ahead.
I know you won't be inside of me for much longer. I know that you'll grow up fast and someday I'll look back and wonder if I appreciated every single moment I had with you.
More than anything, I want that answer to be yes.
September 1st
Like a movie star.
Phillip and I are in Lincoln enjoying the Husker's home opener in Danny's new skybox.
"Isn't this awesome?" Danny says, looking down at the field.
"It is." I rub my belly. "Especially since it's so hot. I'm not sure I could have taken the heat today. It will be so great to have both air conditioning and our own bathroom. I swear, this baby's goal in life is to get me to pee my pants. It's got to be a boy."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because a girl wouldn't do that to another woman. A boy would think it's hilarious."
Danny laughs. "You might be right about that." He lowers his voice and leans closer to me. "Get this. Last night, Lori asked me if I might get traded to a different team eventually."
I can't hide my shock. "What? Why did she ask that? I don't want you to get traded. Why would they trade you? You're doing great!"
"That was my initial reaction. I couldn't believe she'd even suggest it. And then she said she wishes I would have gotten drafted to somewhere more glamorous, like Chicago, New York, or Miami."
"She wants you away from us," I say with a sad sigh.
"I think you might be right," he says grimly as his phone vibrates. He reads a text. "Holy shit. She's coming. She's here."
"Lori decided to come to the game?"
"No, Jennifer."
"Jennifer Edwards? Why?"
"Yesterday when Lori decided not to come, I invited her. She didn't reply, so I assumed she wasn't coming, but she just texted me and said she's here. That she wanted to surprise me."
"Are you surprised?"
"Holy shit. Yeah, I am. Promise me you won't treat her like a movie star."
"Have I ever treated you like a football star?"
"No."
"Then . . ."
"Okay, just make her feel at home." He wipes off his forehead.
"You're sweating. Are you nervous?"
"Ya think? I'm a fucking wreck. I didn't think she'd actually come. Do not let me be alone with her." He shakes his head. "Unless I tell you I want to be alone with her. No, no. Not even then. Even if I say I want to be, don't let me."
"Is she still seeing Knox?"
"I think so."
"Is she happy with him?"
"She says it's not serious. That she always had a crush on him. But he's like ten years older than she is. Way too old."
"But you're just the right age?"
"Shut up." He shoves his hand through his hair, causing the front of it to stick up. "Fuck."
"Danny, calm down. Your parents just walked in."
"That's about like getting caught with a boner. Shit. What am I supposed to tell them? I didn't think this through."
"Have you ever thought anything through?" I can't help but laugh. "Tell them the truth. That you met at a party in LA and invited her to Nebraska so she could see what the fuss is all about."
"Yeah, that's perfect. I shouldn't be nervous. I mean, we're just friends."
"Yes, you're just friends."
"We're just friends," he repeats.
"Danny, would you like me to go meet her?"
"No. No, I want to go. I'll be right back."
Danny escorts Jennifer into the skybox and introduces her to me, then Phillip, Nick, and our friend Blake, who is so cute his nickname is Blakeness, as in Blake, his Royal Hotness.
"Well, fuck me," Jennifer says, fanning her face and looking from Danny, to Phillip, to Nick, to Blake. "Who knew this state was so full of hotties. I totally should have come here sooner."
"You should have," Danny whispers to her.
She's gracious to his parents and is a ball of energy. She's funny, silly, and cute, just as Danny described.
After she gets introduced to everyone, she plops down next to me. "Danny told me all about you. That you've been friends for a really long time. He also said you introduced him to his wife."
I let out a breath. "You get right to the subject, don't you?"
"I wasn't sure how you'd feel about me being here."
"Well," I say slowly, wanting to be tactful, but still letting her know how I feel. "Danny says the two of you are friends. I happen to believe that you can never have too many friends."
She nods slowly and then breaks out into a beaming grin. "I think I'm going to like you. Oh, sweet, the game's starting. Let's go get a seat."
She sits front row between Phillip and Danny and is animatedly cheering.
She and Danny jabber up a storm about everything and nothing.
Phillip leans over and says to me, "I have a surprise for you. Why don't you come to the kitchen?"
Which probably means he wants to talk to me about Jennifer.
But he walks straight to the fridge, pulls out a beer, and hands it to me.
"What's this?" I ask.
"It's a non-alcoholic beer."
"I didn't know there was such a thing. Who would want that?"
"People who want the taste of beer without alcohol. I figured you'd like having a beer during the game."
"That's sweet of you, Phillip," I say, popping the top and taking a sip. "Not bad."
"So, what's going on down there?" He waves a finger toward Jennifer and Danny.
"The game?" I ask, pretending like I don't know what he's talking about.
He gives me a sigh.
"They're friends."
Phillip shakes his head. "Yeah, that's what they keep saying, so why don't I believe them?"
"Because they have a whole lot of sparks."
"That's what worries me. Is it a coincidence that Lori isn't here or was it planned?"
"Lori chose not to come last night."
"And when did Danny invite Jennifer?"
"Well, he invited her when they were in LA, but he texted her again last night and told her Lori wasn't coming. She didn't reply and he was genuinely shocked when she showed up."
"So did they hook up when he was in LA?"
"They talked all night," I tell him.
Phillip rolls his eyes. "Talked?"
"That's what he said."
"Do you believe him?"
"Yeah, I do."
"Interesting," Phillip says, but then breaks into a wide smile as Jennifer runs around the box high-fiving everyone when we score. "Is it bad that I really like her?"
I smack him. "You like her because she said you're hot."
He grabs me around the waist and kisses me. "Are you jealous?"
"Do yo
u want me to be?"
"Do I want you to go all raving bitch like Lori? No. Do I want you to fight for your man by sticking by my side and kissing me all day? Yes."
"Phillip, I loved you before you got so hot."
"Good point. Dang. Guess that means there are no movie star girlfriends in my future."
"No way."
"What about you? I know you and Lori haven't been close lately, but does her being here bother you?"
"A little, but what happens in their marriage isn't really our business. I just want him to be with whoever makes him happy."
"Yeah, me too," Phillip says, but a few short minutes later he pulls Danny aside and talks to him privately.
Danny makes a last minute decision to spend the night instead of driving home and begs us to join him.
Phillip calls Peggy, who has been watching Angel, to see if she would mind if we spent the night.
She told him that the little hellion ate a loaf of bread, bag and all. But she was sleeping curled up on the couch next to her and she'd be happy to.
"So what's fun to do in this town?" Jennifer asks. "Is there like a water tower we can climb or a tractor we can ride? Wait! Can we go cow tipping? I've never been on a real farm."
"What about a hayrack ride?" Danny suggests with a smirk that insinuates the only thing he wants to ride is Jennifer.
I've been wondering how I really feel about all this.
Truth is, even though Lori has been a bitch to me lately, I didn't want to like Jennifer, out of some sort of left over best friend loyalty.
But I can't help myself. She's fun, down-to-earth, and seems genuinely nice.
And from what I can tell, she and Danny haven't crossed any lines. They act like buddies even though their chemistry is palpable.
"We could call the Warren twins," I suggest.
Thirty minutes later, we're on a hayrack ride with a bunch of old friends, drinking beer.
Everyone adores Jennifer and she likes that no one is treating her any differently than we would each other.
"Jennifer is cool," Phillip says, snuggling up with me in the hay.
"Yeah, she is. I really like her. Although, I still sort of feel like I'm cheating. Danny told me that he and Jennifer have emotional intimacy."
"Sounds like us before we dated."
"Yeah, I thought the same thing."
"It's interesting," Phillip says for about the tenth time today.