“Hi.” My voice echoed through the empty mess hall.
His head jerked to me. “You shouldn’t be out of bed.”
“I’m fine.” I wrung my hands. I needed to fix things between us, but I didn’t know where to start.
“I’ll take you back to the infirmary. You should be resting.” He rubbed a fist over his face.
“No, I’m not going back there.” I rubbed the palm of my hand nervously on my sweatpants. “I want to go to my room. Sylvain said its okay.” My face turned red at telling a lie so smoothly, but Chai barely looked at me.
He followed me down the corridor to my room; not saying a word. Not even when we reached my room, did he speak. Unease was growing inside me. He didn’t touch me; he didn’t even look at me. Everything that happened from the moment I stepped into the infirmary and faced Nuevo felt a bit hazy, but I clearly remember telling him I loved him. I was shot, I nearly died and now he had nothing to say to me.
“Chai?” He turned to me and his eyes wandered over my face. A storm brew in his eyes and it hit me – he was furious.
“You’re angry with me,” I said surprised.
The storm broke in his eyes. He slammed the button with a fist and the door shut behind us, before he whirled on me like a tornado.
“Two times now have you got shot because of me! I watched you die!” He looked like he wanted to shake me and involuntarily I took a step back. His anger scared the hell out of me. “I told you to stay in your room. Why didn’t you listen to me? I don’t know if you’re stupid or incredibly brave!”
“Chai…” but he didn’t give me a chance to finish. He took a step closer and the pain in his eyes slammed into my chest, worse than the impact of any bullet. It took my breath away.
“I watched you die…and I could do nothing! I couldn’t let you die. I made Sylvain change you. Now you are what you fear the most. You’re not human anymore. I know you’ll never forgive me for all the hurt I caused you.” He towered over me and for a moment I was sure he wanted to touch me. Then he whirled around and stalked to the door to leave. “I had to save you and now I lost you.” His words cut like a knife through me. He had been through a lot these past days. We both had. If I were in his position I would be angry too – I would die if something happened to him. But he didn’t understand. I had to put myself in danger. I would do anything to keep him safe. It didn’t matter if I had to lose a part of my humanity in the process.
“Chai,” I said softly and he stopped. I took his arm and turned him to face me. The muscles in his shoulders were so tensed; I could physically feel his need to smash something. He was filled with so much pain and anger and my breath hitched.
“Not now, Lexie,” he grunted and tried to pull away from me. But I wouldn’t let him. We’ve wasted too much time already. Both of us could’ve died. I wasn’t going to let another minute go by without letting him know how I feel. I stretched on the tips of my toes and held his face between the palms of my hands, making him look into my eyes.
“I love you. Nothing else matters.”
For a moment he stood completely frozen, then a wild sound came from his throat and his arms went around me, crushing me to his chest. His lips came down on mine. He kissed me hard as if he wanted to erase all the bad memories from his mind. He lifted me in the air, to reach my lips better and I wrapped my legs around his waist. His hands tangled in my hair. The physical need for him inside me was overwhelming. He moved in a blur and carefully lay me down on the bed, not lifting his lips from mine. He was lying on top of me and I pressed my body against his, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get close enough. I needed to get closer. I tugged at his shirt and he lifted his lips only long enough for me to pull it over his head and toss it across the room. I felt the warmth of his skin beneath my hands as they roamed over his shoulders and down the planes of his back. There was still too much between us and my hands reached for my own shirt. I needed to feel his skin on mine. I tugged on my own shirt, but his hands caught mine and stretched them over my head. His lips, gently tracing the line of my jaw down, moved to my throat and when he lifted his head, both our breathing was irregular.
“I love you, little one.” His eyes caressed my face. I never thought I’d hear him say it. Tears welled in my eyes and a single tear escaped and rolled down my cheek. He frowned. “You’re crying,” he said and touched the tear with his fingertip.
“I’m happy,” I whispered and a smile tugged at his mouth. I pressed my lips against his and he kissed me back with a fever that took my breath away and an ache spread through my body. His hands wandered over my thighs and reached behind my knees. He pulled me upright with him so that we were both sitting, my legs still wrapped around him. His hands slipped beneath my shirt, wandering over the sensitive skin of my ribs and I couldn’t contain the groan of pleasure that slipped from my mouth.
He lifted his lips from mine and grinned at me. How I missed to see him smiling at me. I wanted more. I never wanted to be separated from him again. I wanted to show him how much I loved him. I didn’t care what happened between us before. The hurt I felt before was gone.
My hands slid down his chest, trailing the flames of his tattoo to his stomach. My fingers rested on the buckle of his belt. I wanted him more than anything in the world.
He caught my hands and pressed them to his cheek and smiled.
“We need to rest,” he said and lowered me back on to the bed and lay down next to me, pulling me close to his chest. He had the self-control of a priest. I wanted to protest, but I knew he was tired and I stifled a sigh and snuggled close to him. He was asleep within minutes and for a while I listened to his rhythmic breathing before I finally fell asleep.
Chapter 17
Chai was still soundly asleep and I watched him as he lay next to me. I could never get enough of how beautiful and strong his face was. He looked so peaceful and a little smile hovered on his lips. I wondered what he was dreaming. I carefully shifted to the edge of the bed, I needed a shower. I tiptoed to the bathroom and stopped at Chai’s side of the bed. I bent and softly placed a kiss on his cheeks.
“I love you,” I whispered into his hair.
His arm snaked around me and he pulled me on top of him and I yelped in surprise. I thought he was still fast asleep. He opened his eyes and a satisfied smile plucked at his lips.
“Where are you going?” he said lazily as his hand wandered down my spine, distracting me of any rational thoughts.
“Nowhere,” I said without thinking as his other hand joined the one on my back. The length of my body pressed against his and I blushed. He was driving me nuts.
“Good. You’re not going anywhere, my little wood nymph.” He lifted his head and pressed a trail of little kisses on my throat. “You’re hot,” he mumbled between planting kisses on my neck.
“So are you,” I replied and giggled.
“No, I mean you’re skin is hot.” He frowned and scanned my face. “You have a fever.”
I wrinkled my nose at him. I felt fine. “You’re making me hot,” I said and blushed as he laughed and flipped me over on the bed.
“You must go and see Sylvain. Let her make sure you’re okay.” His face turned serious. “I...I had to save you. The DNA…I’m sorry.”
I pressed my lips against his, cutting off his words.
“I don’t care.” I whispered. “You did what you had to do. I understand.”
“Promise me you’ll go see Sylvain.” I nodded and he relaxed. He rolled off the bed onto his feet in one fluid movement.
“Why don’t we rather stay in bed?” I asked hopefully. There were a lot more pleasant things I could think of doing. Chai laughed at me as if he could read my thoughts.
“I wished I could. But I can’t. Bill needs all the help he can get and the Vandelrizi did a lot of damage to the ship. There’s a lot of rebuilding that has to be done.”
Mentioning the Vandelrizi brought me back to reality and I sighed deeply.
“
Did a lot of people get hurt?” I asked tentatively.
“Yes. But we were lucky, it could have been much worse. We weren’t prepared. It won’t happen again.”
“Arianna and Gaios weren’t hurt?” I asked, suddenly scared that my friends were hurt while I was having indecent thoughts.
“They’re fine,” Chai reassured me. “Who do you think killed fourteen of the Vandelrizi? They are arguing of course who killed the most.” He didn’t have to say it. I knew I killed the fifteenth Vandelrizi, Nuevo. I shuddered, but tried to not let any emotion show on my face. I didn’t want any thoughts of what happened spoil this beautiful morning. Chai and I were finally together. Chai picked up his shirt from the floor where I tossed it last night and grinned mischievously at me as he got dressed. I blushed as I thought about last night. If he hadn’t stopped when he did…why did he stop? Didn’t he want me as much as I did him? Before I could stop myself thoughts of him and Emily in his room entered my mind. They spent a lot of time together. And I saw they he kissed her. I knew he was only with her to find out who she was working with, but still. Did they…
“Don’t look so worried,” he bent over and softly kissed me. “We’re safe for now.”
I found Erich in the infirmary when I went to see Sylvain. His left arm was suspended in a sling across his chest, but it didn’t stop him from pulling me into a bear hug when he saw me.
“Shit, Lexie,” he finally said, letting me go. “You scared the hell out of me. We thought…don’t ever do something that stupid again.” He tried hard to control his own emotions and I shifted uncomfortably. I wasn’t used to having so many people care about me. It made me more determined than ever to fight for our freedom, but it also scared me that I had so much more to lose than ever before.
“I had to do something. I couldn’t let him kill any of you.” I said and rocked on the balls of my feet.
“I know and I would’ve done the same,” he said gravely. “But you’re my sister. I haven’t seen Bill so upset since your mother died and Chai…he went ballistic. I thought he was going to tear this place apart. I want you to be safe and happy.”
“If you don’t stop, I’m going to cry,” I threatened and Erich punched my shoulder with his good arm.
Sylvain interrupted us and impatiently shoved a thermometer in my mouth and I pulled a face at Erich. She wasn’t pleased that I left last night without saying a word and now developed a fever. Erich left with a roll of his eyes to find Bill and convince him to get some rest. He had been working nonstop since the attack and Erich was worried about him. The last few days had taken a toll on everyone.
After a couple of minutes Sylvain took the thermometer from my mouth and stared thoughtfully at it.
“You’re temperature is elevated,” she finally said and gave me an accusing look. I was definitely in the dog box.
“I’m not feeling sick,” I replied and it was the truth. I felt great, like I could climb a mountain.
“Maybe you’re coming down with the flue.” Her face softened and she gave me a reassuring pat on the arm. She couldn’t stay angry for long. She reached for a bottle on a trolley and gave me an aspirin. “Take this and you immediately let me know if you feel anything is wrong.”
“I will,” I promised.
The mess hall was transformed into a wonderland. Arianna and Gaios did a wonderful job. The lights were dimmed and candles decorated the tables, offering platters of snacks and drinks. The middle of the room was emptied to make space for a small dance floor. Gaios installed a stereo and music filled the room. People were moving their bodies to the rhythmic beat and Bill twirled Sylvain around the dance floor. She squealed every time he made her spin. I giggled as Erich dipped Arianna in front of me, nearly dropping her on the floor. She looked like she was about to strangle him.
Bill was right. This was just what we needed. Morale hit an all-time low on the ship after the attack. We needed a night of fun, to do something normal. My birthday party was the perfect excuse. Technically my birthday was a couple of days ago, when I was still unconscious after being shot by the soldiers in the infirmary.
I haven’t seen Chai yet. I self-consciously straightened my dress, wondering if he would like it. The dress had a tight fitting bodice that clung to my chest, leaving my shoulders bare and showing just enough of my curves to make me blush. Waves of pale blue silk flowed from the bodice and ended just above my knees. I didn’t recognize myself. Arianna spent hours on my hair and make-up, transforming me into someone else. She even found me a pair of silver strappy heels that gave me some much needed height. The St. Christopher medal was the only piece of jewelry I wore. I never took it off.
Warmth crept up my back and electricity filled the room. I could feel his eyes on me, before I saw him and my heart fluttered in response. Chai wore a pair of smart black pants and a black button-down shirt. He looked incredible. His eyes widened as his gaze wandered over me, taking in every inch. He swallowed hard and cleared his throat.
“You look…You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” His eyes wandered to my lips and I instinctively licked the pink lip-gloss. “Lexie, you’re making it very hard for me when you look like that.”
“It doesn’t have to be.” It was the closest I had come yet to tell him straightforward what I wanted. Until now he had been in perfect control and stopped every time before we crossed the line. I didn’t get why. He took my hand and pulled me closer to him. His arms went around my waist and he slowly moved to the music.
“I didn’t know you can dance,” I said as we moved across the floor.
“I’m Wonder boy. I can do anything.” He grinned and pulled me tightly against him. There was something very protective and possessive in the way he held me. A couple of younger boys from the rebel group were staring unabashed at me and I blushed at the almost eager look on their faces as they looked at me. Chai’s eyes narrowed and they quickly turned away. He lowered his head and pressed a kiss on my bare shoulder.
“I have something for you.” He pulled a rectangular box from his pocket. A red bow was pressed on top. He swallowed hard as he held it towards me. I never thought I’d see the day he was nervous. He shouldn’t be. I would love anything he gave me, even if it was a rock.
I lifted the lid of the box with trembling fingers. Inside a bracelet rested on a bed of cotton wool. I lifted it from the box - intricate gold and silver leaves were entwined with small flowers. Blue stones adorned the center of the delicate flowers. It was breathtakingly beautiful. On the inside was an inscription and I twirled it to read it. It was in a foreign language and I raised my eyebrows questioningly at him.
“It says that your mine now and forever.”
“It’s beautiful.” I swallowed hard at the lump in my throat. I wasn’t going to cry, not even happy tears. Chai took the bracelet from my fingers and clasped it around my wrist. The light reflected of the blue stones.
Happy birthday, little one.
“Thank you.” I managed to say.
I love you. My heart soared and I threw my arms around his neck, not caring who sees when I show him how much I liked my present.
Chapter 18
My head pounded. I touched my forehead. It felt as if I was on fire. I trudged to the mirror and examined my face. Two bright spots of red were on my cheeks. My pupils were dilated and my eyes shone too brightly in my flushed face. I was definitely running a fever.
I managed to get dressed, though every move I made sent daggers of pain through my body. Something was seriously wrong with me. I wished Chai was here, but he left with the patrol early this morning.
Sylvain would know what to do. I shook so much; I could barely push the button to open the door of my room. The corridor swayed and tilted and I pressed my hands against the wall to stay upright. I hadn’t far to go to reach the infirmary and I willed myself to move forward. The floor seemed to give way under me and I grabbed at the wall, but my hands only touched empty air. I slumped to the floor in a groan.
>
“Lexie, what’s wrong?” Gaios scooped me from the floor in one move, scanning my face.
“I’m…flue…hot,” I mumbled incoherently. The words in my mind were incapable of reaching my mouth. He rushed me to the infirmary and deposited me on the nearest bed. Sylvain was next to me in seconds, her hands moving across my hot face.
“She’s got a fever. I need to run some tests…” I slapped her hand away. I didn’t need any tests. I needed Chai. I would feel better if he was here. I tumbled from the bed. Immediately the floor dipped and I couldn’t stop myself from falling into the dark hole below.
The darkness was everywhere. I couldn’t escape it. But the dark wasn’t the worse. There was pain. Stabbing and prodding and slicing pain. Everywhere. I was on fire. Everything burned. My whole body. Voices drifted in the darkness. They called my name, but I couldn’t answer. I tried to yell, to cry to move. I tried to reach for the voices, but I couldn’t.
The room blurred. I blinked. Why was I so tired? I tried to lift my hand, but it felt too heavy. I looked down. Someone was holding my hand. Why was the bed shaking?
“I’m here,” Chai tried to reassure me, but panic built in me. His brows furrowed. I tried to swallow. The fire was gone. Extinguished. But something else had taken its place. Ice. A cold so overwhelming it could slice through bone. It wasn’t the bed shaking. It was me. I was trembling uncontrollably.
I tried to say his name, but I only croaked. I focused on his face, tapping in on the little energy I had left. Help me. Pain and frustration flashed in his eyes. He heard me.
“Do something,” he snapped at Sylvain. She stood next to my bed with a small handheld device. She slowly shook her head.
“I don’t know what to do.” She looked helplessly at me. “Her DNA is changing, her body adapting to the change. I can’t do anything to stop it. It’s too late. You knew we took a big risk using our technology on a human.”
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