“Probably,” he admits. “But you’re so much more fun than grading derivatives.” He smiles warmly.
I hold his warm gaze and smile back. “Even though I’m a mess?”
“Even then.”
Our food arrives. A large steaming pizza and two salads covered in dressing are set down in front of us. The server is the same woman who was behind the counter, and this time she openly stares at Julian like she wants to crawl on his lap and eat his face. This time he notices. He winks at her and she blushes, stumbling out of the room.
He grins knowingly. “Haven’t lost it completely.”
“I see.” I grab my silverware and shake them out of the napkin, glaring as they crash to the table.
He laughs at my disgruntled expression. “I’m single now. I have to start putting myself out there.”
I think if he knew, my eyes would be off. “Uh-huh.” I dig into my salad and watch him take a slice of pizza. “Thank you for lunch. When are you going to let me pay for something?”
“Never,” he says, just as his cell chimes. He takes it out of his pocket and smiles in a way I know it isn’t Jaz he’s talking to.
I take a slice of pizza and shove it into my mouth. “Well, you don’t have a say.”
“In what?” he asks absentmindedly, eyes on his phone.
“Nothing,” I mumble sadly. I take another large bite and eye the arcade. The lights flash invitingly, tempting anyone with a quarter in their pocket. “They have air hockey.”
He smiles flirtatiously at the phone and then looks up, turning that handsome sexy smile on me. “You want to play?”
“Who are you talking to?” I can’t take it anymore.
His smile drops, but he seems to come to a conclusion in his head. His eyes are off again, but he does it anyway. He answers me. “Deborah. She’s an old college buddy too. She works for Jaz now, so whenever he comes down so does she.”
We’re friends. This is the only way it can be. I don’t even know why I wonder if it can be different. Or what might come with that difference. Savannah is an indicator that we’re doing something we aren’t supposed to be doing. Julian’s right. I can’t keep doing things without my well-being in mind. No one else is going to put me first. Being upset because he’s talking to someone named Deborah is most certainly not in my best interest. But that didn’t change my emotions. I’m still pissed. “Does she want you?”
“Seems like.”
I let my breath out slowly. “You should go for it.”
He pauses, brows screwing together. “I should?”
“Yeah. Show Layla you’re an amazing guy and she’s an idiot for letting you go.” I smile sweetly. Inside, I am burning.
“Why do I get the impression you don’t mean that?” His cool gray eyes study me intently.
“We’re friends. Of course, I mean it.”
“I’m not ready for a relationship.” He sets his phone down. “My ex’s shit is still all over my house.”
Stupid peach lotion.
“But if you think so.” He shrugs oddly as if someone’s forcing his shoulders up. “Maybe I’ll give her a try.”
I stare down at my salad and force the lump from my throat. “I think so.”
He sighs. “Makes no sense,” he mumbles under his breath. “None of you women make any sense.”
The only one not making sense here is my emotions.
I feel safe around him, and sometimes I feel like he might mean more than what he says, but that doesn’t give me the right to crush on him. I just got crushed by Brady. And though I want to leave Brady in the dust, I’m not sure he’s going to let me. Nessa won’t let me. Mr. Ean won’t let me.
I will not let me.
For a few minutes, we eat in silence. I make no sense and neither does he. It’s almost as if he wanted me to say something different. He couldn’t possibly want me to. I want him to want me to. Damn. I’m already putting my wants onto Julian. I sneak a glance to find him watching me.
He doesn’t avert his eyes.
Neither do I.
“I want you to have fun tonight. You deserve to let loose and have a good time.”
“Do I look like the kind of girl who lets loose? I’m not even old enough to drink.”
He scratches the back of his neck at the same time he shrugs. “What I don’t see, I don’t know.”
I grin. “My, my, Mr. Ean. You’re being bad. How do teachers get punished?”
His eyelids lower, and I know I’m sitting at the table with the lion. We’re dining on pizza and salad, and yet I want him to eat me first.
“Probably not detention.”
“Probably not.” I bite my lip. Am I doing this? “I should spank you.” I’m doing this.
“You should? With what?”
“A … ruler.”
“How academically correct of you.”
“Keep talking. You’re making your punishment worse.”
His lips part and his eyes leak something I’ve never seen before. Something men know about and Brady never will. “How are you going to manage that?”
I sit back and eye him. “I’d probably use physical force. But that’s just me.”
“How?” he keeps going.
“You’re a large man, so I’d have to be quick about it. I’d grab you and then I’d pull your pants down. You know, for proper contact. We always have to be proper, Mr. Ean.”
“Of course,” he plays along, mouth open even more. “You’d just take them off? What if I’m wearing a belt? You have to think about these things, Kael.”
“I’d spank you with that too.” I harden my tone. “Fine, let’s pretend you’re wearing a belt and jeans.” He wants to draw this out, I’ll draw it out. “I’d start with your belt.”
“Uh-huh,” he says, reaching over to grip the edge of the table. “Keep going.”
“I’d probably be sitting. You know, for the proper spanking position.”
“Always proper.” His eyes lower with something that makes me sure he doesn’t want to try with Deborah.
“I’d undo your belt slowly while you watch. I’d pull it through your belt loops and set it aside for later. Then I’d undo your zipper. You’re watching me, aren’t you, Julian?”
“Mhm.”
“I slide your zipper down slowly, revealing your boxers.” He swallows hard. “I’d push your jeans off, your boxers too, and turn you around.”
“You are asking for it,” he whispers, a lion in heat. “I shouldn’t like this so much. Keep going. I’m naked now. What would you do then?”
“It’s just a guess, of course, but your ass is as sexy as the rest of you. I pick up my ruler, my pink and fluffy ruler, and spank you. Hard.” There’s an ache between my legs I’ve never felt before. It’s primal and intense. “Because you’re bad, Mr. Ean. And bad teachers get punished.”
“What about the belt?”
“What about it? At this point, you probably can’t take anymore. Bent over, ass slapped pink.”
“I can take it.” He shifts in his seat, moving his hips like he’s getting comfortable. “What about the belt? You’re being kind of bad right now, Kaelyn. Maybe I turn the tables around on you.”
“Me?”
He grins, lips smooth, eyes lowered. “I’d take your jeans off. Your panties too, pulling them down your thighs as you—”
The shrill sound of the air hockey table springs to life behind him. It shatters our bubble, blows apart the ache between my thighs. As I what!
I look over his shoulder as a father and son start a game. When I return to him, he’s sitting back, lion tamed.
“Guess I wasn’t so bad after all.”
He smiles crookedly. “I’ll punish you eventually.”
I want to taste that crooked smile. “Bring it on, Mr. Ean.”
The air hockey sounds again, announcing the scoring of a goal. I smile at the little boy as he celebrates. He’s cheering and bright-eyed, simply having fun with his father. It looks simple
from here, but deep down I didn’t understand the connection. There isn’t an ounce of worry on his face. I’m struck by a sense of happiness for the boy I never had.
“You have such an incredible smile, Kael. I wish you’d do it more often.”
My cheeks burn. “Julian.”
He leans forward. “I mean it. Your smile is probably the best part of this day.”
I feel winded. I brush his compliment away with a roll of my eyes. “The pizza’s getting cold.”
He chuckles. “Being sexy? No problem for you. Arguing? Sure, you love it. But a compliment sends you running? You’re maddening sometimes.”
I take another slice of pizza, and attempt to block the attraction I feel for him right now. It’s hard. He’s so … him. So stormy-eyed and bad. I wonder if friends do this. Make each other want the other. The idea that Julian might want me in this moment as badly I want him, unnerves me. It can’t be true. I’m a pain in his ass and he’s a teacher. His job won’t go anywhere. I’ll be a student until June. By then who’s to say we’ll even know each other? Sadness erases the want I allowed myself to feel. Right now, Julian is all I have. But even if I had a choice, even if I was forced to pick one person, he would be it.
We pass Savannah and her friend on the way out. Julian leaves a wide space between us as we walk to Jaz’s truck. I avoid anyone but the sidewalk, staring at the stains in the asphalt as if they’re going to block me from Savannah’s probing gaze. On the drive to his place, we’re quiet. I wonder if it’s because he was bad, or if it’s because Savannah knows we both are.
I disappear upstairs when we get home, finishing where I left off organizing. I manage to make my room look comfortable and warm by the time Julian comes knocking at my door. He’s showered and dressed. His hair is pushed back with something wet and glossy. He’s wearing a white button-down shirt, untucked, top two buttons undone, with dark jeans, and he’s shaved.
“You want to get ready now? I’ll be downstairs.”
He looks so good I only stare.
“Kael?”
I shake my head. “Um, yeah. I’ll hurry.”
“Take your time.” He looks around my room, taking in the new space as my own. When he’s done, he gives me a private smile before leaving me to get ready.
I shower in his bathroom since mine doesn’t have any soap. Getting dressed is the hard part. I don’t have any cute clothes. I search through everything I have until I settle on skinny jeans and a purple lacey floral blouse. I dry my hair and then apply my makeup. When I’m done, I examine myself in the bathroom mirror. My hair could have more body, but for tonight I guess it’ll do. I refrain from licking the pink stain from my lips. I look … passable. I guess. I freak myself out and shut the light off, putting on some flats and grabbing my purse and meeting Julian downstairs. He’s waiting by the door. When he sees me, he pauses and stares, eyes caressing my body.
“How do I look?” I ask, flushing under his heavy stare.
He licks his lips as he studies the small amount of cleavage poking out of my lace neckline. “Sexy.”
I meet his eyes as the bottom falls out of me. “I was going for passable.”
That makes him chuckle. “Sure you were.” He pats his pockets. “Ready to have fun?”
“I guess.”
“Aww, Kael. Smile, laugh. We’re going to one of Jaz’s famous parties. Get ready to have the time of your life.” He eyes me. “Is it working?”
I shake my head.
“Well, I tried. At least attempt to have fun? I plan on getting shitfaced five different ways.”
“You’re not a very good role model.” I put my hand on my hip.
He walks toward me, touching the elbow propped on my hip. “Tonight, I’m anything but a role model. Sometimes I want to be my age. Let loose.” His thumb toys with the underside of my elbow before his warm fingertips slide temptingly down my forearm. “Forget.”
I feel like he’s warning me; chills break out across my arm. “Are you sure I should even go?”
“Positive. Come on.” He releases me and clears his throat, heading for the door.
He turns the radio on as we drive to the coast. But before we get there he turns it down and glances at me.
“Don’t take drinks from strangers.”
I gape at him. “Yes, Dad.”
“I’m serious. Don’t go anywhere with a guy you don’t know.”
“Seriously, Julian?”
“Seriously, Kaelyn. Don’t do drugs. I’m not going to pretend not to see that.”
“Is that all, master?”
“No.” He looks out the window. “But that’s all I’m going to say.”
“One, I’m not that stupid. Two, you don’t have to worry. I’m eighteen.”
“Age is just a number. It doesn’t make you smart or dumb. Trust me.”
When we get to Jaz’s, the coast is lit up. Lights clash with the moon. His house is packed with people and hip hop music bleeds onto the sandy lawn. Dozens of cars hog the driveway. Julian’s Volkswagen is crammed between an Audi and a beat-up Ford. I gawk up at the house. There are too many people. What am I doing here? I don’t go to parties.
Julian parks Jaz’s truck and looks at me, grinning. He’s already younger. He looks bad and rebellious. It’s sexy.
“You ready?”
I nod wordlessly.
Together we exit the truck. I take a deep breath walking up the stairs. The front door is already open and people are cavorting in the living room. The moment we step inside the music pounds in my chest. Women are wearing bikinis and moving their hips like nothing else matters. They dance with their hands in the air, shaking their bodies. Julian takes my hand and leads me through the chaos. I’m immediately overwhelmed. This is fun? Too many people and loud music? Then again, I don’t know what fun is. For all I know, my idea of fun doesn’t even exist.
We end up on the back deck that overlooks the beach. Dark waves roll in as Julian searches the deck. Jaz is surrounded by women, sitting around a fire. When he spots Julian, he shouts, extracting himself from his horde. He comes over and they hug it out the way men do. All fists and testosterone. I am so over this.
“What’s up, man? This is crazy huh? There’s so much ass here I can’t do it all. Help me out.”
Julian shakes his head and laughs. “I’m sure you need my help.”
His grin is slow and naughty when he spots me. “You came.”
“Not for you.”
Julian grins at Jaz. “Firecracker, isn’t she?”
“Mhm. I’d like to light her fine ass on fire.”
Rolling his eyes, Julian pats Jaz on the back. “Where’s Deb?”
“Around here somewhere. She won’t shut up about you. Go bone her and then get back here. We’ve got to party all night, bro.” He shoves Julian toward the door.
He turns to me, eyebrows raised.
“Just go,” I grumble.
“You sure?”
No. “Yes. I’ll be fine.” I won’t be fine. “Have fun,” I add begrudgingly.
He gives me that private smile again. “You too, Kael.”
The second he’s gone, I’m surrounded by wolves. And I’m tasty. Really tasty.
Jaz stalks me. His eyes are glowing. His long hair trails down his back, and he starts to dance, moving his hips to the beat. “Dance with me, Kael.”
I put my hand on his chest to stop him from coming closer. “I don’t dance.”
“This is a party. You’re dancing.”
He grabs my elbow and starts to pull me over to the house. “I don’t know how.”
“Are you sober?” He looks down reproachfully. “How dare you come to my party and be sober. Let’s go have a drink.”
“I’m only eighteen.”
“What? Didn’t hear that.”
I yank my elbow free of his grasp. “I don’t want to drink.”
“Why not?”
“I’ve never been drunk. It’s not smart. I’m trying to be smarter.�
��
“You sound like Julian’s been rubbing off on you.”
I can’t help but laugh. “Sort of,” I admit. “But he’s right.”
“He usually is, the prick. One drink? Who better to get drunk with your first time than me?”
“I’m not going to sleep with you.” I say it point blank. That’s not happening.
He isn’t deterred, giving me a wink. “Sure you’re not.”
I can’t help it again. He drags another laugh from me. “You’re so sure of yourself.”
“I have every reason to be.” He looks around him, at the half-naked women and men who want them. “One drink?”
I sigh unpleasantly. “One.”
He grins as if he just won. As if that one drink is going to get me in bed with him. What made men think we were that simple? Were we, or did our slim options determine our simple moves?
“Since it’s your first time let’s not push the limits or you’ll wake up not remembering our time together. You’ll regret it.”
“I’m sure.”
He smirks as he reaches over to grab a bottle of something clear. “A shot of tequila ought to fix you right up. This shit will have you dancing in no time.”
“Can’t wait.”
He pours me a shot. “I love the pessimistic ones. You’re so fun to crack.”
“Crack away.” My tone can’t get any drier.
Grinning, he hands me a shot and then pours himself one. I stare into the clear liquid fearfully just as Julian enters the kitchen. A brunette follows him, her hands wrapped around his arm. She’s gorgeous, with sultry brown eyes and a figure my own envies. They’re laughing about something, but Julian’s smile falls when he spies the shot in my hand.
“What is that?” he demands.
“Tequila,” Jaz supplies innocently.
“She should have a beer.”
“She wants tequila. Don’t you, gorgeous?”
I eye Deb. She’s all over him. All. Over. Him. I look Julian in the eye, and then I take the shot. It feels like fire. I try and spit it out, but it’s already down. The taste is too strong; I gag.
“Here, here,” Jaz says, laughing. He hands me a glass of something light brown, but Julian takes it away before I can get it to my lips.
Under The Peaches (Teaching Love Series Book 1) Page 12