A look of discomfort flashed across Reese’s face. At first Brody thought her finger was hurting her, but then he recognized that look of hurt in her eyes. It was one he had seen before. Something inside her was wounded. Deeply wounded. And he wasn’t going to stand by and let her feel that way any longer.
He slid one hand around her waist at the same time that the other curled around her neck, then he leaned closer, about to do what he had been wanting to do since the moment he had first seen her walking along the beach a week before.
“Reese,” he murmured as his mouth descended toward hers.
The touch of his hand on the back of her neck sent a cascade of heat to every nerve in her body. And when he said her name as his lips came closer, ever closer, she thought she would explode with anticipation—anticipation she didn’t even know she had been feeling.
With her hands hanging at her sides, she tilted her head ever so slightly to give him the last bit of encouragement she thought he needed. And when his lips finally pressed against hers, an eruption of longing, desire, wanting throbbed inside her.
As if they had a mind of their own, her arms snaked around his neck, holding him against her.
The feel of her arms around his neck gave Brody all the confirmation he needed.
She wants this too.
Joy suffused him, and his kiss became more insistent. The desire he had been feeling intensified, and he wanted to scoop her up and carry her into his bedroom. But after the short time he had been with her, he had learned that she wouldn’t be rushed, and pushing her now would be a mistake. It had taken a week before she had granted him this kiss, this amazing kiss. He knew it would take even longer before she would permit things to go any farther. But that was okay. She was worth it.
As their lips pressed together, Reese felt things she hadn’t felt in a while. She liked it. Too much. Her heart pounded as she considered all the things she wanted but knew she couldn’t have. Brody.
I have to put a stop to this. Now. Before it goes too far.
Reluctantly, she unwrapped her arms from around his neck, then gently pulled away. When their eyes met, she could see his pupils dilated with obvious desire. Guilt lanced through her that she had given in to what her body wanted when she knew it was a mistake to let him think there might be a future for them.
She knew it was time to go, to move on, to step out of Brody’s life. But she had to be subtle. She couldn’t risk Brody knowing what she had in mind or he would talk her out of it—or at least try. And after the incredible kiss they had just shared, she was too vulnerable, could be too easily swayed.
I have to be strong. I have to do what I know will be best for both of us. I have to leave.
“I . . . I need to finish cutting up these vegetables,” she said with a tentative smile.
He nodded, a wide grin on his face. “Right.”
Brody hadn’t felt this happy since before Megan had been killed. It was a feeling he had thought he would never feel again. Yet here he was, falling for Reese. Falling hard. As he gazed at her now, he knew she felt something for him. He could read it in her eyes. Yet there was something else there as well. Something he couldn’t read.
I’m not going to over-analyze this. I’m just going to enjoy this day.
“I should probably finish making the dip,” he said. Then, with a smile he couldn’t erase, he turned back to his task, working side-by-side with the woman who was bringing him back to life.
Thirty-One
Reese surveyed the preparations she and Brody had worked on all afternoon, but instead of feeling excited about serving the items at Brody’s party, she felt sad. Because she wouldn’t be there.
“Everything looks delicious,” he said as he began putting the plates of food in the fridge. “I hope everyone comes hungry.”
Reese nodded and played along. “I’m sure they will.” As she watched him rearrange his fridge to fit everything, misery grew within her. Misery at knowing how upset Brody would be when she didn’t show up for his party.
It’s better for him to feel a little unhappy now rather than the way he would feel later when he discovers I would just be an embarrassment to him and his family.
In a hurry now to be away from this man who was everything she wanted but everything she couldn’t have, she said, “I need to go home and get ready.”
Brody turned to her with a smile. “Would you like me to drive you back to the RV park?”
Reese shook her head. “No. I need to stretch my legs.”
“All right. I’d love to walk you back, if that’s okay.”
I need to say my good-byes here. Now. Reese smiled. “You still have things to do to get ready. I’ll just hurry home, then come right back.” The lie tasted bitter in her mouth, and she had to look away so he wouldn’t see the deception in her eyes.
“Okay. See you in a while then.”
Reese looked at Brody, memorizing the blue-green of his eyes, the masculine strength of his body, the tenderness in his expression as he looked at her. She nodded, then walked to the door that led to the beach, stepped outside, and descended the stairs.
The beautiful day was lost on her as she hurried down the beach, her vision clouded by tears, and before she knew it, she was back at her RV.
I’m glad I packed everything up earlier. I need to go before I change my mind.
After a quick check to make sure everything was securely in place, she climbed behind the wheel of her old RV and turned on the engine. It started right up.
You’re old, but reliable.
With a sad smile, Reese pulled out of her RV site and drove up the hill toward the exit, stopping at the dump station to empty her waste tanks. With a final look around, and with tears in her eyes, she climbed behind the wheel and headed out the exit.
I’m doing the right thing. I know I am. In the long run this is what is best for me. And for Brody.
As she pictured him puttering around in his kitchen, expecting her to come back and help host his party, shame at deceiving him poured over her like acid.
See, Reese? You don’t deserve him. He would never do something like this to you. He’s honorable and good. YOU AREN’T WORTHY OF HIM.
The tears that had been hovering on her lashes overflowed and slid down her cheeks, and as much as it hurt, she knew leaving was the right thing to do. With her gone, Brody could focus on finding someone else, someone who would fit in better with his life and his family. Someone else he could love.
Tears streamed down her face as she drove north.
Brody looked at the time again, a frown forming on his mouth.
She should be here by now.
He went out to his balcony and looked down the beach, and when he didn’t see her, he went down to the sand and began walking in the direction he knew she would be coming. Despite the fact that his guests would be arriving in less than an hour, he kept walking, anxious to find Reese.
As he approached the Pacific Coast Highway, and then the RV park, a feeling of dread grew within him. And as he entered the park and hurried toward her RV site, then saw an empty space where her RV should be, he gasped, unable to believe what he was seeing.
She’s gone. Reese is gone.
He didn’t stop walking until he was standing in the same place he had stood earlier that day when he had climbed inside her RV.
Wait. She said she needed to dump her tanks. Maybe she just left to take care of that.
Holding on to that sliver of hope, he sat at the picnic table assigned to her site and waited. And waited. He thought about the amazing kiss he had shared with her only a few hours earlier.
Does that have something to do with this? Was it too soon?
With a shake of his head, he berated himself for thinking he could magically fix whatever was hurting her simply by placing his lips on hers.
Who do I think I am?
With a certainty that could not be denied, he knew she was not coming back. He slowly stood and stared at the ocean as he
thought about her.
Obviously, she doesn’t want to be with me, but am I ready to let her go so easily? Am I willing to give her up without a fight?
He set his jaw, then slowly shook his head.
No. I have to try. I have to.
He sat back down, pulled out his phone, sent a quick text to Avery and Logan apologizing for canceling the dinner party, then stared at Reese’s name in his list of contacts. Then, before he could change his mind, he sent her a text.
Brody: I understand, but that doesn’t mean I accept it.
He stood, tucked his phone in his pocket, then began walking toward home, his mind cataloguing all he needed to do to find Reese, the woman he wasn’t ready to let go.
Reese’s phone chimed a message. There was no question it was from Brody. Seth never texted her, and Brody had every reason to.
He knows I left.
Torn between wanting to find out what he said, and terrified to know, Reese kept driving. She had been heading north since she had left two hours before. Not sure yet where she was going to go, she liked the feeling of freedom—at least when she wasn’t thinking about Brody and how much she missed him already.
Forty-five minutes later she stopped to gas up, and that’s when her curiosity got the better of her. She pulled out her phone and read the message from Brody.
Brody: I understand, but that doesn’t mean I accept it.
She frowned as she tried to decipher the meaning behind his words.
What does he understand? He has no idea how I feel. How could he possibly when he comes from the perfect family and leads a charmed life?
After she calmed a bit, she reread the message.
What does he mean he doesn’t accept it? I don’t understand. It’s not like he has a choice. I’ve left. He’ll never see me again.
She looked into the distance, then focused on the message he had sent.
He’s probably so used to getting his way that it hasn’t occurred to him that he’s not going to this time.
The irritation she felt now was a welcome replacement for the guilt and sadness she had been feeling, and she clung to it, knowing it would help her get through this.
I’m happier this way. I’m happy on my own. I am.
With a final look south—toward Malibu—she set off again, her mind and heart warring with each other over what she had done.
Part Two
Finding Reese
The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.
Finding Reese (Searching for Love, Book Two)
Copyright © 2015 by Christine Kersey
All rights reserved
No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher.
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One
“I need to borrow your camping gear,” Brody Ford said into his phone as he stood on the balcony of his beach house and gazed at the Pacific Ocean. The sun was beginning to set, which made him think of Reese and her love of taking sunset photos.
Though this phone call was all about taking the first step toward finding her, he tried to push away an image of her face. The idea that he would never see her again pained him.
It’s not like she’s gone forever. She isn’t Megan.
His thoughts went to the woman who had been killed in a car accident over a year before. The woman he had loved with all his heart. She was gone forever.
Reese isn’t Megan. Reese is out there somewhere. And I’m going to find her.
“Sure, you can borrow my camping gear,” Logan said, then he laughed. “You haven’t been camping in years though, bro. Do you remember how to do it?”
Ignoring the jab, Brody frowned. “I’ll need to borrow your truck too.”
“My truck? What for?”
Brody’s jaw tightened, then he forced himself to relax. “Your gear won’t exactly fit in my Porsche.”
“If you take my truck, what am I supposed to drive?”
Brody hesitated, but only for a few seconds. “You can use my car.”
“Wait, what? You’re going to let me drive your pride and joy?”
With a small shake of his head, Brody put aside his worries that Logan would scratch or otherwise damage his little black sports car, and instead focused on the task at hand. “Yeah.”
“What the heck, bro? Why do you want to go camping all of a sudden?”
Not eager to tell his younger brother how he had kissed Reese and then how she had fled without so much as a good-bye, Brody said, “I have my reasons.”
“Obviously. But I want to know what they are.”
Brody chuckled. “You’ve always been nosy. I guess some things never change.”
Logan laughed. “Yeah, well.”
With a sigh, Brody decided to come clean. Maybe Logan will even have something helpful to say. His mouth turned up in a half-smile at the thought. “Fine. You remember Reese?”
“The woman who showed up at your beach house the other night and took pictures of you, me, Trinity, and Rochelle?”
Brody thought of that embarrassing evening where he had bungled everything. Logan had brought two women to his house—without telling him in advance—and when Reese had shown up and Brody had invited her in, she had thought he wanted her to take pictures of him and Trinity. The corners of his mouth turned down in a frown as he thought about how stupid he had felt after realizing his mistake. At least I cleared things up the next day. “Yes, her.”
Logan laughed again, this time louder. “You’re taking her camping? What kind of date is that? You’re slipping, bro.”
Brody shook his head, his patience about gone. “Would you stop? I’m not taking her camping.”
“All right. Then why do you need my camping gear, and what does Reese have to do with it.”
Feeling more foolish now at his idea to try to find the woman who had been on his mind since the moment he had seen her walking down the beach a week before, Brody’s shoulders slumped. “You know what? Never mind.”
“Never mind you’re not going camping, or never mind you’re not going to tell me why?”
Confused and discouraged—where should I even begin looking?—Brody ran his fingers through his hair as he watched a flock of seagulls fly overhead. Silly as it was, even this reminded him of Reese. Two nights before, when she had come for dinner, a seagull had crapped on her back.
“I don’t know what I want.” Brody shook his head. “I gotta go, Logan.” He disconnected the call, turned his back to the ocean, and leaned against the railing as he stared at his house.
Without having Reese’s arrival to look forward to—as he had each of the last few days—he found it hard to get motivated to do much of anything.
You’ve only known her a week. How can you have fallen so hard for her already?
Baffled at the question, he shook his head, then sank onto a lounge chair as he thought about what he should do about it.
Reese pulled her RV into the Walmart parking lot, found an open area at the far end of the lot where two other RVs were parked, parked near them, and shut off the engine. Resting her arms on the steering wheel, she leaned forward and looked out her windshield.
Seems as good a place as any to spend the night.
When Reese had gotten her RV, she had learned about something called boondocking, where RVers park their RV’s overnight for free at places like Walmart, or at truck stops and such. Needing to save money—and needing
to stock up on supplies—it seemed like a good idea to spend the night right here.
She climbed out of the driver’s seat and into her living room.
“I guess that’s one good thing about this being my home,” she murmured. “I don’t have to go far to get a snack after driving for hours.”
Trying not to think about what she had left behind in Malibu—about Brody—she opened her fridge and pulled out a bottle of cold water before opening her windows to let the cool evening breeze flow into the interior of her RV.
She made a list of supplies that she needed, then grabbed her purse and headed into the Walmart. Forty-five minutes later she was loading those supplies into her cupboards, grateful to her brother Seth for depositing money into her account.
Eventually I’ll earn enough from my photos that I won’t need his money.
Wanting to be completely independent, she looked forward to that day.
Using her cell phone as a hotspot, Reese set her laptop on the table and went to the website where she sold her pictures. To her surprise, she saw she had sold a copy of one of the sunset photos she had taken in Malibu. As she studied the picture, she recognized it as one she had snapped from Brody’s balcony only the night before and had uploaded just that morning.
As she stared at the image, her mind went back to her date with Brody the previous night, which led to thoughts of their time together earlier that day. And to memories of their kiss.
Closing her eyes, she leaned her head back and tried to conjure up the memory of the way it had felt when he had slipped one hand around her waist while curling his other hand around her neck before his lips had descended toward hers. As she remembered the way his lips had devoured hers, warmth wrapped around her, and she craved his presence.
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