She wasn’t sure of the answer to the question, but the thought of another man doing what he had done made her stomach roll. Okay, so she would need a little time and distance before searching out another lover. That was fine. She had time.
Muffin trotted past on her way to another tree where a long sniffing session was in order. Billie watched her, then stiffened when she heard footsteps on the path. Her heart fluttered, then slowed when she realized they didn’t belong to Jefri.
How horrible that her world had been reduced to him or not him. Funny how she hadn’t known she was involved and now she had to work on getting over him.
The king rounded the corner in the path and moved toward her. Billie knew bolting wasn’t an option so she braced herself for the interruption and rose to her feet.
“Please,” he said as he waved her back onto her seat. “Do you mind a little company?”
“Of course not, Your Highness.”
He sat next to her and took her hand. “I will admit that spending time with such a beautiful young woman brightens my day.”
She did her best to smile. “While I appreciate the compliment, you’re in a position of great power. Doesn’t that mean you can get all the young women you want?”
He raised his eyebrows. “You are right. I had forgotten. I will see to acquiring as many as possible this very afternoon.”
Her smile turned genuine. “That would make for an interesting to-do list.”
“I agree. My staff would not know what had happened to me.” He patted her hand, then released it. “Tell me about the training. It goes well?”
“Yes. You have excellent pilots in the program.” None better than Jefri, but she wasn’t going to talk about him if she could help it. “We’re taking their individual strengths and honing them, while shoring up weaknesses. At the same time, we’re working on making them a team. Your deserts will be well protected from the skies.”
“That is good to hear.” The king sighed. “Times changed. A hundred years ago could anyone have imagined having to patrol the deserts in such a fashion?”
“Probably not. But change isn’t always bad.”
“I agree. We must keep up with the times, as they say. Move forward. Invest in our future.”
“Is that what Tahira is?” she asked before she could stop herself. “An investment in the future?”
She kept her gaze on Muffin rather than the king, but she felt the monarch study her.
“I am an old man,” he said. “Is it so wrong for me to want grandchildren to brighten my days?”
“Not at all. I wish you a great many.”
He patted her knee. “Our ways are different and can be confusing, but the desires of a parent are universal. We want our children to be happy, to produce the next generation.”
“You’re certainly going to get that.”
“You do not approve of Tahira.”
Billie glanced at him. “I don’t know her, but I’m sure she’s a lovely young woman.”
“Then you do not understand why Jefri would enter into an arranged union.”
“I’ll admit that practice is a little mind-boggling.”
“He was married before. Did he tell you?”
She nodded. “He said she wasn’t what he thought. That she was more interested in money and position than being his wife.”
“That is correct. When Jefri learned of this, he came to me to ask for a divorce, which I granted. He was sad to see his marriage end, but not heartbroken. I realized then he had never loved her.” The king looked into the distance. “I have married for duty and for love, and I have learned that marrying for love is better. I tried to tell him that, but he would not listen. When it was time for him to produce heirs, he asked me to find him the proper bride.”
Billie bristled as she remembered Jefri’s list. “Docile, reasonably attractive and good with children.”
The king raised his eyebrows. “He told you that?”
“Sometimes the prince only looks intelligent.”
He laughed. “Perhaps you are correct. I waited for him to find his own bride, but he did not seem to be interested in looking, so I agreed to conduct the search myself.”
“Enter Tahira.”
“Yes. She is a good girl, raised by the sisters, instructed on how to be the right kind of wife.”
Billy couldn’t help thinking of the trained animals in a circus.
“How lucky for her,” she said, hoping the words didn’t sound too sarcastic.
“You do not approve.”
“I doubt my opinion matters.”
“There are other circumstances,” the king said. “Her father was a close friend of mine and I promised to look after her. The school sheltered her from the world and now she has to leave.”
Billie turned to him. “You chose the school specifically. You wanted Tahira to be innocent, raised in a manner to make her worthy of being a princess. You thought she should marry one of your sons.”
He nodded.
“Why not Crown Prince Murat?” she asked in a moment of desperation.
“Tahira would not survive the rigors of being queen. She isn’t strong enough.”
“Which leaves only Jefri,” Billie said dully.
“It is a matter of honor. To break the engagement now would be to dishonor the memory of my friend and Tahira’s good name.”
Of course, Billie thought. Why would anything be easy?
“Tahira could break things off,” the king added. “If she wanted to.”
“Right.” Because she had so many other choices. No doubt she’d been raised expecting to marry Jefri from the time she could grasp the concept. What young woman in Tahira’s place would want to say no?
“Still, I will not force my son into a marriage he does not want,” the king said. “Should Jefri come to me…”
He let the words trail away, but she had already figured out what he meant. Should Jefri go to his father and demand the engagement be broken, the king would agree. But there would be a scandal and Jefri would be seen as selfish and willful. Tahira would be dishonored and while Billie wasn’t sure what went along with that, she knew it couldn’t be good.
It was a lot to ask, based on one night of great sex.
“Jefri won’t come to you,” she said with a sureness that made the ache inside worse. “He and I…” She swallowed. “We never had a relationship. There’s nothing for either of us to get over.”
“As you wish, my dear.”
It wasn’t as she wished, but it was exactly as it was. Billie excused herself and called for Muffin. Most of the time she really liked her life, but sometimes, like now, it sucked.
Billie and Muffin walked back to their room. Billie figured she was due a long soak in the massive tub. She would use her most expensive bath salts and do her best to float away her troubles. She would stay in until she got all wrinkly, then she would put on the fluffy robe provided by the palace, curl up in bed and watch chick flicks from the DVD collection. She’d more than earned the time to lick her wounds.
But as she walked toward her door, she saw someone leaning against the wall. As her heart didn’t even flicker, she knew it wasn’t Jefri. Muffin gave a little bark of excitement and ran down the hallway. Her dog only ever got that happy when Doyle was around.
“What do you want?” Billie asked as she approached. “Just so you know—I’m not in the mood for a lecture.”
“I wasn’t planning to give one,” he said as he held her dog and fondled Muffin’s ears. “I’m just checking on you.”
“I’m still alive, still breathing. Is that information enough?”
One look in Doyle’s blue eyes told her the answer was no. She sighed, then pushed opened the door and stood back to let him in.
“You have ten minutes,” she said. “Then I want to take a bath.”
Her brother set down the dog. “How bad are you hurt?” he asked.
The unexpected question, not to mention the concern in his voi
ce, nearly did her in. Tears burned in her eyes and she had to blink them back.
“I’m fine.”
“You never were much of a liar,” he said, his expression grim. “Dammit, Billie, I tried to warn you.”
“I’m fine,” she repeated, doing her best to mean it this time. “We had a few laughs, a good time and now it’s over.”
Doyle narrowed his gaze. “Tell me he didn’t break your heart.”
She dismissed the statement with a flick of her wrist. “I didn’t know him long enough for him to break anything. Come on. It was a few days. Am I happy that there’s now someone else? No. But I’m not destroyed. I’ll get over this and move on with my life.”
She liked how the words sounded, how she sounded, but there was a cold place inside that told her she might not be telling the truth about any of it.
Better not to go there, she thought.
“He’s a bastard,” Doyle said flatly as he shoved his hands into his slacks pockets. “I should go beat the crap out of him.”
“While I appreciate the sentiment, I would urge caution. There are several flaws in your plan.”
“Such as?”
“Jefri isn’t totally to blame. He didn’t know about Tahira either.”
“He sent his father looking for a wife. In my book that makes him damn guilty.”
“Agreed, but he also asked him to call off the search.” Billie tried to focus on the sweetness of her brother wanting to take care of her rather than the pain of Jefri’s betrayal. “He was just as shocked as the rest of us.”
“But you’re the one who was hurt,” Doyle insisted. “I should go find him right now and reduce him to mush.”
“Not a good idea. Whatever the outcome, you’d probably be thrown in prison. I doubt they’d treat you very well, so I’d be forced to sell myself to the head guard just to get you food and water.”
Doyle moved close and cupped her cheek. “I’m not kidding, Billie. I want him to pay.”
She nodded. “I’m not kidding either. I want you to stay out of this. You’re not in charge of my life.”
“I told you this would happen if you got involved with him but you wouldn’t listen.”
She hadn’t wanted to listen. She’d wanted to be with Jefri. He’d excited her and challenged her. She’d thought…
She’d thought a lot of things, she admitted to herself. She’d wanted the fantasy—a handsome prince who adored her. Well, for twenty-four hours she’d had just that. Now it was back to the real world.
She stepped back from Doyle’s touch and squared her shoulders. “I’m going to be okay with this,” she said firmly. “I’m a little rattled by what happened because coming home to Jefri’s fiancée seems grossly unfair, but I suppose that’s the downside of dating a prince. We had a good time. I don’t regret what happened and I refuse to apologize for it.”
“That sounds pretty tough.”
“It’s the truth. You can believe it or not.”
He shook his head. “This is why we’ve all tried to protect you. Left on your own, you get into trouble.”
“It’s my life, Doyle. You can’t protect me forever. And while we’re on the subject, let me point out at least I took a chance. When was the last time you got involved with any woman who wasn’t a brainless nit? God forbid you meet a woman you can actually connect with on some level other than sex. But that would ruin it for you, wouldn’t it? I don’t know what you’re running from or what you’re afraid of, but I suggest you get yourself a little bit closer to normal before you start making accusations about me.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Want to bet?”
He glared at her, but she refused to back down. Doyle blinked first and turned away.
“Let me know if you change your mind about me beating him up,” he grumbled as he walked to the door.
“I will. And I appreciate that you worry about me, even though you don’t have to.”
“You’re my sister,” he said gruffly.
She smiled for the first time since learning about Tahira. “I love you, too.”
“This phase of the training involves teamwork,” Billie said two days later.
She stood at the front of the largest classroom in the main hangar. Several diagrams covered the dry-erase board behind her. She’d been lecturing for the better part of an hour.
No one looking at her would ever guess anything was wrong, but Jefri knew. She might sound confident and strong, but she hadn’t once looked at him.
“The sky gets small pretty fast when four or five fighters are covering the same territory. While you can’t predict what your enemy will do next, you should be able to sense what your team is going to do. That’s why we’re spending so much time on the topic. I want you to develop a sixth sense about your teammates’ actions and strategies. I want each of you to be able to predict what the other will do.”
She continued talking, outlining how much time would be spent in simulations before they went out in jets.
“Crashing is so much simpler when we do it on a simulator,” she said with a grin.
The men laughed. Billie’s gaze swept around the room. For a split second, it landed on him. He sensed her instant tension before she quickly turned away.
He felt her pain, and he ached in return. He had tried to speak with her, but she avoided him. For how long? When would she allow him to explain? And if she did, what was there to say? The problem of Tahira had yet to be solved.
“All right,” Billie said. “Let’s go try all this theory on the simulators.”
The pilots rose and followed her out of the classroom. Jefri hung back, biding his time. Even if she avoided him during the day, she still came home to the palace in the evening.
She led the first pilots through the simulation of flying together in formation. In less than three minutes he heard the sound of an explosion followed by swearing.
Billie looked up from her seat at the master control console.
“You know, this whole flying thing means we can do more than go back and forth. We can also go up and down.”
The pilot who’d messed up stepped out of the simulator and grinned sheepishly. “I wasn’t looking down.”
“Which explains why you crashed into the plane below yours. This is not a good thing. Okay, who’s next?”
The team worked through the program until they had finished. Finally only Jefri was left.
He stepped toward the simulator. Billie pushed the buttons to set the controls, then stepped aside to let him enter. Before he took his seat, he glanced at her.
“How long do you plan to avoid me?” he asked, his voice low even though they were the last two people left in the simulation room.
“Indefinitely,” she said. “The computer will act as the other pilots. The program is simple—don’t try to get fancy.”
He’d heard the lecture before. “I know what I’m doing.”
“Really?” She stared at him. “I’d have to say I don’t agree with that statement.”
She moved back to the main controls. “Push the start button when you’re ready.”
He settled himself into the seat and focused on the cockpit. The detailed simulation made it seem as if he were actually flying. After familiarizing himself with what was expected, he reached for the controls, then started the program.
He immediately found himself in the middle of an attack. There were three other planes with him and one of the enemy. One of the planes on his side signaled tone-lock.
Jefri instinctively banked left. The second the sensation of movement washed over him, he knew he’d made a mistake. He wasn’t alone in the skies and—
The windshield cracked and the controls shuddered in a poor imitation of a crash.
Billie jumped out of her chair and raced over to the simulator.
“What the hell are you playing at?” she demanded in obvious fury. “How dare you fly so badly? That was barely ten seconds.”
He knew she was right. Unfortunately his attention was not on his job.
“This is damned expensive equipment and my time is valuable. If you’re not willing to take this seriously, then get out of here and free up some time for someone who is.”
Fire flashed in her eyes. Her breath came quickly. Even in anger, she was beautiful and passionate. Need flooded him. Not just to have her with him in bed, but to simply talk and touch. There were so many things he hadn’t been able to find out. They’d had too little time together.
“Well?” she asked. “Do you think this is a game?”
“Not at all.”
“You lasted less than ten seconds,” she pointed out again. “We both know you’re better than that.”
“I am sorry,” he told her.
He meant for more than the simulation. She pressed her lips together.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, it does,” he said. He reached for her hand.
She pulled back. “Don’t do that. You’re engaged.”
“Not officially.”
“It’s official enough for me. Besides, there’s no way you could want someone like Tahira and someone like me. We couldn’t be more different.”
“Who said I wanted Tahira?”
She tucked her hands behind her back. “You asked for someone like her.”
“Maybe I made a mistake.”
Something flickered in her eyes. Hope, he wondered. But then the emotion faded.
“You’re going to have to live with that mistake,” she said. “It’s a matter of honor.”
His mouth twisted. “You have been speaking with my father.”
“He didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know. You made your decision long before you met me. There’s nothing either of us can do about it.”
“If I could change things, would you want me to?” he asked.
She stared at him for a long time. He tried to read her thoughts, but he couldn’t. Her blue eyes gave nothing away. Heat flared between them, as did wanting. He refused to believe that was only on his side. Billie had to feel it, too.
Desert Rogues Part 2 Page 49