by Jillian Neal
“What can I make you, Fionna?” The Governor stepped in again. He poured Mrs. Vindico a large glass of white wine and handed it to her, though she hadn’t asked for one.
Fionna smiled. “I’ll just have whatever Dan’s having.” Dan tightened his arm over Fionna’s shoulders to try to give her a place to hide.
“If she keeps this up, Dan’s going to drink the entire liquor cabinet, so you may have to drive.” Her adorable giggle calmed him.
“You know, girls, I was just reading an article in Women of the Realm that said that red wine not only has positive benefits for your heart, but it’s also good for all of your reproductive organs. It ripens your uterus,” Mrs. Vindico informed Kara and Fionna.
Dan felt all of the blood in his head drain quickly to his feet, as he took in Fionna’s mouth hanging open in shock.
“Here,” Governor Vindico handed Dan and Fionna glasses of the same wine he’d poured for his wife. “Daniel, why don’t you show Fionna around? I’ll get this ham sliced and then we’ll eat,” he offered apologetically, as Kara began to argue with her mother.
Dan guided Fionna out of the kitchen and through the well-appointed dining room, complete with hardwood flooring and wainscoted walls. The family Christmas tree had been erected there, and held all of his mother’s glass baubles that she insisted on collecting.
He guided her into the living room, and tried not to lament the horrible blue carpeting his mother insisted on having in every other room of the house.
“Fi, baby, I am so sorry,” Dan pled as soon as he’d gotten Fionna out of earshot of his parents. She covered her mouth, trying not to guffaw.
“Wow,” she whispered when she regained the ability to talk.
“I told you she was insane.” Dan knew he’d made a huge mistake by bringing Fionna to meet his mother.
“No, it’s fine. I just don’t seem to know how to respond.”
“Well, that’s because you are sane.” Dan downed the wine quickly.
“Dan, really it’s fine. Please don’t be nervous. I’m okay. Don’t let your mom freak you out.”
“Baby, I’m not freaking out.” He tried to soothe his own energy so he could soothe her. “I’m just terrified every time she opens her mouth that you’re going to run out the front door. I wouldn’t blame you.”
With a sweet smile, the one that Dan had fallen head-over- heels for, Fionna leaned toward him and brushed a tender kiss on his jaw.
“I’m fine.” She gazed up at him, which calmed him instantly. Dan was mesmerized. The golden flecks in her sienna eyes sparkled, like a beacon leading him on.
He gently set his wine glass on a nearby bookshelf and caressed Fionna’s face with his hand as he guided her lips to his. He needed to taste her. He needed to feel her permeate him. He needed a draw of the heavenly life she offered him.
He traced her bottom lip with his tongue. Her breath came faster as she opened her mouth. Dan leaned his head to the other side, as he began devouring her mouth and the energy it held. He felt all of the pent-up aggravation and stress that had formed when he’d stepped into his parents’ home, melt away. She gracefully set her full wine glass on the shelf beside his without breaking from his lips. He moaned quietly in her mouth, as he wrapped his arms around her tightly. He pulled away as she gasped for breath but, desperate for more, he worked his hungry lips down her slender neck.
“I love you,” she whispered as he made his way back and consumed her lips once again.
“Me, too.”
She edged her fingers into his hair and tugged him towards her. Her insatiable need drove him wild.
Suddenly, the front door burst open. Dan jerked away and Fionna gasped, as they both turned just in time to hear… “Whassup bitches?” screech loudly from Lindley, who’d stepped into the foyer.
Fionna’s eyes goggled as they took in Dan’s youngest sister. She was wearing a sheer orange skirt that revealed the black thong underneath. The tank-top she was wearing was also orange and had the words ‘Spank Me’ written across her chest in silver letters. She’d completed her ensemble with thigh-high motorcycle boots and a denim jacket. The most disturbing thing, in Dan’s opinion, was Lindley’s normally long blonde hair dyed in varying shades of black and purple. It matched her heavy eye makeup that made her appear that she’d been given two black eyes.
Lindley turned and studied Fionna before she smirked. “Oh right, I forgot Danny boy was bringing his new slut-a-hoe to dinner.”
Dan’s fists clenched tightly as he started towards his sister, planning to threaten her with bodily harm. Fionna grabbed his forearm and shook her head.
“She wants your attention.” Somehow she didn’t seem to mind the extremely rude comment. She offered Lindley a kind smile.
Dan knew Fionna was right. It was precisely what he told his parents, whenever Lindley pulled a stunt like this.
Dan’s parents stared at Lindley in full-blown shock.
“Uh… um… well, I thought we could enjoy appetizers in here.” In true Marion Vindico form, Dan’s mother chose to ignore anything she did not want to see. She refused to look at Lindley for any length of time. “Fionna made them, and they just look lovely.” She set the tray on the coffee table and went back to open another wine bottle.
Zach and Kara moved into the living room. They were both carrying small glass plates and exchanged a simultaneous eye roll as they took in Lindley.
“What’s up, Care Bear?” Lindley bounced towards Kara.
“Hey, Lind, nice outfit.” Kara huffed indignantly as she sipped the seltzer water that her mother had provided her.
“Aww, ya think?” Lindley popped her tongue against the roof of her mouth and then, to Dan’s horror, she spun and made the sheer fabric of the skirt flare out. Fionna almost choked, as Dan looked away in disgust.
Zach seated Kara and made her a plate of the appetizers before situating himself between Kara and Dan.
“Fionna, these are delicious. I think I’ve had something like this when I’ve been by your parents’ bakery. Do you make them for your dad?” Kara asked very sweetly. Dan offered her an extremely appreciative smile.
“Dad taught me to make them a long time ago, but I don’t make them for the bakery.” Fionna accepted the tiny plate of delicious finger sandwiches, made on cheddar-cheese baguettes, from Dan.
Lindley scowled as she studied the sandwiches and the vegetables on the tray.
“You know,” she held one of the sandwiches precariously between her index finger and thumb. She made a rude gagging noise.
“Milk cows are either raped by bulls or artificially inseminated against their will, and forced to have offspring whether they want to or not. Then their babies are taken away from them so that humans can have the milk.”
Fionna smiled and handled Lindley beautifully.
“I didn’t know you were vegan, Lindley; but the dip I made for the vegetables doesn’t have any animal byproducts in it, so you should be safe with that.” Dan leaned over and kissed her cheek. He wrapped his arm over her, desperate to protect her from his family. Zach gave him a very impressed smile.
His mother beamed over the kiss for a full minute and a half. She should have been in here earlier, Dan thought wryly, as he recalled the impassioned kiss they’d shared before his sister’s explosive arrival.
Fionna’s rebuttal only served to further irritate Lindley.
“So, Fionna,” Lindley huffed, “why don’t you tell the fam when you hoed it out for Dan, and how you’ve managed to keep him interested for more than forty-eight hours?”
“Lindley,” Governor Vindico spat, “you will be polite to your brother’s girlfriend or you can leave.”
Dan glared hatefully at his sister as Fionna’s jaw clenched.
“You do not have to answer anything she asks you or even speak to her at all.” Dan kept his glare leveled at Lindley.
“Uh, well,” Fionna began, once she’d regained her equilibrium. “Dan came to a party the Angels thre
w, and we ended up having dinner and a few drinks that night. He invited me to Sydney with him, and it sort of went from there.”
“Oh, so you went down. Yeah, Dan likes that,” Lindley announced haughtily, just for the shock of saying something like that. Fionna almost dropped her wine glass. Dan reached and took it from her shaking hand. Governor Vindico’s eyes closed in defeat as he shook his head.
Mrs. Vindico chose to completely ignore Lindley, and turned her full attention on Fionna.
“Yes, Fionna, tell us all about the Angels. Now, how long have you played for them, dear? I can’t wait to tell a few friends.”
“Mother, no one can know we’re dating.” Panic clouded Dan’s already bad mood. Between Lindley and his mother, his heart wasn’t going to survive the evening. His parents, of all people, should understand that anyone knowing about their relationship could get Fionna murdered.
“Yes, yes, I know, but when you decide that I can tell people.”
Fionna nodded, as some of the color began to return to her cheeks.
“Well, I was recruited from the Academy the year Kara and I graduated, so about eight years now.”
“She was the lead Receiver for the Vixens the whole time we were at school, Mom. She’s amazing,” Kara added helpfully.
Dan decided to send his sister flowers the next day.
“We enjoyed the challenge we went to recently. I really thought that was unfair how they didn’t give you more time after you’d already had to do two other transfers,” Mrs. Vindico leapt back in for more information.
Fionna smiled, and Dan couldn’t quite hide his chuckle.
“Thank you, but unfortunately that’s not really the way the challenges go, I guess. It turned out to be a pretty great day, all in all, though.”
Dan smiled at her adoringly.
“Yeah,” he agreed as he brushed another kiss across her cheek, “it was an amazing day.” The night they’d met. The night they’d sealed their fate as he’d made her all his own, would always be qualified as one of the greatest days of his life.
As the appetizers disappeared, Mrs. Vindico seated everyone at the dining room table, where she’d arranged fine china plates and the silver.
“I’m really underdressed,” Fionna panicked as she took in the display.
“She’s trying to impress you, so you’ll stick around.” Dan winked at her.
“Maybe I should I tell her that it’s her son I find so impressive.” She somehow always made him feel like a king.
The bowls and trays were passed, and Dan couldn’t help but quip as the ham was served, “Gee, Lindley, you’re the only vegan I know who eats pig.”
“Blow me,” Lindley shot back furiously.
Dinner began, and Kara sighed. “So, Lindley, you’re going to be an aunt again.” She braced for the retort everyone knew was coming.
“Great.” Lindley rolled her eyes. “Can’t wait to see which of his sperm actually got through. Why don’t you just go ahead and name the kid ‘pussy’? That way, you can save his friends the time.” She shot Zach a challenging glare.
Zach scowled, but Kara caught his arm. “Just ignore her,” she warned as he speared a piece of ham viciously onto his fork.
“Now, Fionna, dear, back to you. How long do you plan on playing for the Angels? You must be thinking about settling down and starting a family soon.” Mrs. Vindico urged. Dan promptly choked on his water as Fionna looked at him, utterly bewildered.
“My God, Mother,” Dan spat as soon as he regained the ability to breathe. “As if she’s not bad enough.” He threw toward Lindley. “Must you give her the third degree?”
“Well, Daniel, it was my understanding that women who play in Summation challenges cannot be pregnant. It could be harmful to the baby, so that will be something we need to plan.”
“Marion, Dan and Fionna haven’t been dating very long. I know that I, for one, would really like for our family to not ruin this for him. I don’t think that we’ll ever need to plan anything on Fionna’s account. She seems perfectly capable. So, how about we talk about something else?” Governor Vindico ordered.
Dan gave his father a very appreciative look, as Fionna withered in her chair.
Mrs. Vindico drew another breath as she offered more mayonnaise for the canned pears, arranged on pieces of wilted lettuce, that resided in an oozing concoction on everyone’s salad plates.
“Thank you.” Fionna accepted the mayonnaise. She added just a little to her still-full plate. As Dan wasn’t any more excited about eating the salad, that his mother insisted on making repeatedly over the last thirty years, than she seemed to be, he leaned in closer. “Don’t eat it if you don’t like it, baby.”
“Oh, no, it’s good,” Fionna lied as she cut a small piece of the pear, avoiding the mayonnaise, and choked it down with a large swig of water.
“Daniel, have you taken Fionna to your house yet?” Mrs. Vindico asked curiously.
With a slight eye-roll, Dan shook his head.
“No, Mom, we just got back from Sydney. We’re heading there when we leave.”
“I assume that you’ll be taking Fionna home after that.” In the very odd juxtaposition that was Marion Vindico, she remembered that, according to her world rules, the marriage must come before the grandchild she so desperately wanted Dan to father.
“No, Mother, I won’t.”
With a quick purse of her lips to show her disapproval, she went on. “Well, I’ll tell you, Fionna, Daniel’s home could really use a feminine touch.” Mrs. Vindico began passing lumpy, partially-cooked mashed potatoes and canned English peas around the table insistently.
Dan whimpered. “Fi, baby, there is a pistol in the glove box of the truck.” He huffed as Fionna began to giggle. “I really want you to go outside, get it, and then to just shoot me now.”
Fionna covered her mouth in an effort to hide her hysterical laughter.
“Please,” Dan pled, further cracking her up.
“I keep telling Daniel that he’d never get a woman who would make an acceptable daughter-in-law and mother to his sons if he doesn’t spruce the place up a little. You know curtains, throw pillows, knickknacks, pictures on the walls, that kind of thing.”
Dan ground his teeth. “You know, Mom, if she doesn’t leave me after this meal, then I think she’ll make it through the fact that I don’t have curtains.”
Fionna was still trying to quell her laughter as she glanced around the Vindicos’ home.
Dan’s mother was obsessed with window coverings, and every window in their home had solid wooden blinds, sheers, and extensive curtains, sewn of busily-patterned fabrics. Dan had believed since he was a child that his mother was trying to choke out any fresh air that could possibly be brought into the home before he had a chance to breathe it in.
“Well, I’ll bet Fionna’s home is well-appointed and that she has draperies, Daniel.”
Lindley wasn’t going to let that go. Dan squeezed his eyes shut in defeat.
“It’s not her drapes he’s interested in, Mom; it’s her carpet.”
Fionna managed to chew through a bite of ham and choke it down, before smiling at Mrs. Vindico.
“I’ve actually been redoing my home since I bought it last year.” She was clearly hoping to guide the table to a slightly different topic. Governor Vindico leapt to help.
“Is it an older home, dear, or did you just not care for the aesthetics?”
“It’s a bungalow. It was built in the early sixties, so I’ve been redoing it a little bit at a time. It’s been fun. I love shopping for period pieces and mixing them with newer, more modern stuff. Garrett told me I should re-do the floors, but I just had them resealed. I love all the old markings and scuffs. I think it gives it character.”
“I completely agree with you. I hate when people buy these beautiful pieces of architectural history and then gut them. What’s the point? Garrett’s like his old man; always has been. Stephen likes a fresh start. Nothing wrong with that, eit
her, I suppose.” the Governor kept up the conversation easily. He looked very impressed with Fionna, and allowed Dan to breathe for the moment.
“I kind of like my windows uncovered. I made a few little café curtains from some old flour sacks I found at a craft fair back in the summer. They don’t really cover much, but I love all of the sunshine they let in.”
Mrs. Vindico looked deeply distressed, and Dan was quite certain that he could never love anything more than the woman seated beside him.
“I also knocked out a wall between the master bathroom and one of the closets. The bathrooms are kind of tiny.” Fionna wrinkled her nose as she continued her descriptions.
Governor Vindico chuckled. “Well, Dan’s probably used to that. His mother used to make him share a bathroom with all three of the girls.”
Fionna laughed as Dan huffed, “She thought it would help us bond.”
“And it did. It was in all of the parenting books, and Women of the Realm suggested it.” Mrs. Vindico insisted.
Governor Vindico chuckled, as he shook his head. “I finally stepped in and added another bathroom upstairs when Dan threatened to build himself an outhouse in the backyard.”
Lindley’s eyes spun in delight.
“He just got his panties in a bunch because Mere and I found his Playboy stash under the bathroom sink. ‘Whatcha doin’ in there, Danny?’”
Dan wasn’t certain which he would’ve preferred at that moment; to die or to murder Lindley. Fionna coughed and then drank copious amounts of water and refused to meet anyone’s eye.
“Fionna, do you have any sisters or brothers?” Mrs. Vindico didn’t care for her husband’s teasing or Lindley’s remark.
“No, ma’am. It’s just me.” She glanced at Dan, clearly not certain if this was the right answer.
“You have no idea how lucky you are,” Dan spat under his breath, as he glared at Lindley. Mrs. Vindico considered the response with a terse pout.
“And do you think you’ll only want one child or to have a bigger family?”
Dan shifted his glare to his mother as he rubbed Fionna’s leg consolingly.