by Liz Isaacson
“Do you like being a principal?”
“Most days.” She began to load the dishes from lunch into the dishwasher. “Just not in May or September. Or December. Or—”
Grant burst out laughing. “You just named half the months in the school year.”
She straightened and met his eye. “I’ve been in Brush Creek for a while,” she said.
“And?”
“And most principals get moved to different schools throughout their careers. This is just an assignment. A temporary one.”
A frown marred his whole face. “Are you saying you could be leaving?”
“Not could be,” she said. “I was actually expecting a transfer this year. I’d be shocked if one didn’t come for next year.”
“Where will you go?”
“I don’t get to choose.”
“What are the options?”
“The district is pretty big. Could be up to an hour away.”
“Oh, an hour.” His joviality came back. “I can handle an hour.”
Maybe he could, but Shannon was beginning to wonder if she could survive without him at her side all the time.
Chapter Ten
Grant didn’t know revealing secrets could be so liberating. He imagined it felt a lot like forgetting about the wrongs he’d done in the past. Once he’d paid back Landon every dime—plus interest—he’d know what that felt like.
The high pushed him through the next few weeks where he only saw Shannon on weekends, where they spent a large portion of their time planning the summer school afternoon activities—and kissing. There was always kissing on the weekends.
Bullseye took to lying around the cabin in a state of depression for days after a good playdate with her dogs, and Grant understood the animal’s feelings. He puttered around his cabin on the weeknight evenings, wondering what she was making for dinner and if she missed him as much as he pined for her.
Thankfully, she seemed to hold an advanced degree in texting, and he’d figured out a pattern for her, since she never messaged at school. If there was someone who worked more than cowboys did, it was a principal, as Shannon rarely texted before six pm.
Tonight’s read School’s out on Friday! Let’s celebrate.
Grant wanted to know how Shannon celebrated such a thing, so he asked What do you want to do?
Surprise me.
Grant groaned, the sound loud in his silent cabin. He had no idea how to surprise a woman like Shannon, who’d taken cruises with her sister for years. Who tamed hundreds of children and ran a constantly moving ship of teachers, aides, and custodians. Who knew how to make lasagna with eggplant.
He almost texted back to say he didn’t do surprises, but erased the message. He didn’t want her to think he was unromantic, or didn’t know her, or wasn’t excited that school was out this Friday.
Feeling frantic, he said, “C’mon, Bullseye,” and stepped outside. Summer had almost arrived in Brush Creek, and the trees boasted full foliage, the grass was emerald green from the April rains, and everything smelled fresh and clean. Well, as clean as a horse ranch could smell.
He trekked across the gravel lane to the homestead, hoping he could catch both Landon and Megan at the same time. He knocked and entered at the same time. “Hello?”
Megan glanced up from where she sat at the kitchen counter. “Come on in, Grant. Landon’s in the backyard with the kids.”
She looked tired, and Grant almost thanked her and left her alone—which she clearly wanted. But something whispered to stop and talk to her.
“Hey,” he said. “I actually came to talk to you.”
She abandoned her book and turned toward him. “What’s going on?”
“So I’m dating Shannon Sharpe, right?”
“Right.” Megan grinned at him. “Is it going well?”
“Well enough,” he said. “School gets out on Friday, and she wants me to surprise her.” He held out his phone so she could see the texts.
Megan finished reading and whistled. “What are you going to do?”
“That’s why I’m here. What do you think?”
“I barely know Shannon Sharpe. I mean, the girls go to school there, but we’ve had very little interaction with her.”
“But you’re a woman. What would you like?”
“A romantic weekend in Salt Lake City without the kids,” she answered immediately. “Maybe go to the symphony, dinner I don’t have to cook, shopping, sleeping in.” She sighed and her eyes took on a faraway quality.
Grant chuckled nervously, thinking of Shannon in a swimming suit on a cruise ship. Even if he could afford such a thing, they weren’t married and couldn’t possibly take a weekend trip together. Could they?
“I realize that won’t work for you,” she said. “Let’s see.” She turned thoughtful and after several prolonged moments, she said, “I’ll ask the other ranch wives.” She reached for her phone before Grant could stop her.
“No, I—”
Her thumbs flew and she put the phone down. “Done.”
Grant’s hopes deflated a little. “I don’t want everyone to know.”
“Know what? That you’re dating Shannon? Everyone already knows that, silly.”
He folded his arms and leaned his weight on his back foot. “That I don’t know how to surprise her.”
Megan laughed. “Grant, don’t worry about it. I gave up on surprises from Landon a while ago, though he does still manage to do something that makes me fall in love with him all over again.” She wore a small smile as she looked toward the sliding glass door. “We ranch wives have learned to tell our men what we want.”
That sounded great to Grant. “When will Shannon do that?” he asked.
Megan grinned wickedly. “Probably in about the third year of your marriage.”
Pure panic bolted through Grant. “Oh, we’re not—I mean—marriage?” His voice came out as weak and rusty as an old hinge.
“Oh, we’re not there yet.” Megan covered her mouth in mock surprise. “At least you aren’t.” Her phone buzzed, stealing her attention away, but Grant could barely focus past the M-word. Did Shannon think about marrying him? He wasn’t even sure how that was possible. And then what? She’d come live up here in his cowboy cabin and become a ranch wife? Did she even want such a thing?
He didn’t know, which meant no, he wasn’t anywhere near ready to talk marriage. He just needed a good surprise to help her celebrate the end of the school year.
“April says Shannon comes to her step class every week, and she can give you a certificate for a free month.” Megan scanned the phone. “Tess said she’ll make a cake that’s all summery. Her exact words are ‘every woman loves chocolate.’” Megan glanced up, but Grant was still reeling from the fact that Shannon went to a step class every week. There was so much he didn’t know about her. Who was he kidding? How had he deluded himself to think he knew her at all?
“I have to go,” he said. “Thanks, Megan.”
“Wait! I think you should get her a massage gift certificate. She works hard, I bet. And Molly says don’t make her cook for herself for a while. Renee suggested a cleaning service. And Erin—”
“I’ll figure something out,” Grant said, somewhat surprised that all the suggestions coming from the ranch wives were about making their lives more pampered. He crossed the lane, thinking he’d never once wished for a massage or someone to come clean his cabin. Now cake he could get behind, but he wasn’t sure he wanted Tess to make it. She already did so much for everyone around her, and Grant didn’t want to add more to her schedule with only a couple of days notice.
On Friday evening after work, he found a beautifully decorated cake sitting on his kitchen counter. It was decorated with a beach scene, with a bright yellow sun that screamed summer vacation. Next to it sat an envelope that held a massage gift certificate and the coupon for a free month of step classes with April.
Gratitude filled his whole soul at the loving kindness of his friends. He’
d planned a romantic dinner but hadn’t done much past that. Number one, he wasn’t convinced someone like Shannon really wanted a stranger in her house or rubbing her down. She liked being in control, and he’d been forced to add “neat freak” to her list of flaws, because the fact was the woman had very few things she wasn’t good at.
A note sat next to the items the ranch wives had brought over. Take a chance it read, sending Grant’s heart into a frenzy.
He didn’t take chances. He didn’t make bets. He didn’t do risky things. Not anymore. He didn’t want to crave the rush of excitement when he won, or the disappointing devastation when he lost. It was better if he lived where there weren’t wins or losses, nothing to gamble with, nothing to chance.
And yet somehow, he’d put his heart on the chopping block. Had he already lost it to Shannon Sharpe?
Something told him that yes, he definitely had gambled with his heart and had already lost it to a beautiful blonde.
Chapter Eleven
Grant was late—something that had never happened. Shannon had survived the last week of school by sheer willpower, and she’d clung to the thought of Grant whisking her away on a fun-filled surprise to get her through this last day.
And now he wasn’t here. Hadn’t called or texted.
Have fun on your date! Ruth messaged, but Shannon didn’t have the heart to respond. So maybe she’d spent the past couple of evenings in her neighbor’s backyard, detailing most details of her relationship with Grant. She’d had to do something once Ruth caught them kissing. And honestly, Shannon liked talking things through with another woman. Hannah had always been that person, and Shannon missed her more acutely than ever.
She went to the front window and checked outside. No truck. No Grant. She let the blinds drop and she sat in the armchair closest to the door so she’d know the instant his rumbly truck arrived.
Forty minutes later, Shannon jolted awake, having dozed off at some point. Something had woken her, and she glanced around as she tried to remember where she was and what she’d been doing.
Living room. Grant.
She lunged toward the blinds but had barely parted them before a knock sounded on the door. In the past, Grant had just walked right in, but he didn’t this time. If it was even him.
Shannon hoped with everything she had that it was him. She hurried around the couch and opened the door, relief coating her at the sight of the handsome cowboy on her front porch.
“Hey,” she said. “You’re later than I expected.”
“Yeah.” He stuck his free hand in his pocket. In his other he carried a gorgeously decorated cake. He made no move to enter the house.
Shannon’s mouth watered, both from the man and the dessert. She glanced up into his face, but he wouldn’t look at her. She noticed the complete agony on his face, and all her hopes for the evening took a dive.
“Is everything okay?”
He shook his head and brushed past her. “I’ll just put this stuff in the kitchen.” He moved through her living room and set the cake on the counter. Next to it, he placed a few envelopes he extracted from his back pocket. “The ranch wives put this all together.”
Shannon closed the door and followed him, her heart rocketing around in her chest. She slipped her fingers into his, but he pulled away quickly.
“I have to go.”
“Go?” She moved in front of him so he couldn’t rush out. “Why? I thought we were going to celebrate the last day of school tonight.”
He chin-nodded toward the stash on the counter. “There’s the celebration.” He still wouldn’t look at her, and Shannon felt very much like she was trying to hold onto smoke.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
He exhaled, letting the air out in a slow hiss between his teeth. “I don’t think this is gonna work out between us.”
Shannon fell back a step, sure she hadn’t heard him right. Things had been going great. She liked him; he told her things about his life; she’d shared some of hers with him. Did she know everything about him? No. Did she want to? Very much so.
“Why not?”
He shrugged one shoulder and shoved both hands in his pockets. He reminded her so much of the way students shut down, and she suspected she’d get nothing out of him while he was in this state.
“What about summer school?” she asked.
“I can’t do it,” he said. “Landon needs me on the ranch.”
Shannon had talked to Grant extensively about the summer program. She could do it herself, at least for the first week, if she had to. But it wasn’t that loss that stung so harshly.
“So that’s it.” She wasn’t asking. And she wasn’t going to beg him to stay though everything inside her felt frantic. What’s going on? she prayed. What do I say here?
“I guess so.” He made to step around her, but she blocked him again.
“Are you going to tell me what I did wrong?”
He finally looked at her, his eyes dark eyes glimmering like sunlight on murky water. “You did nothing wrong.”
She put her hand on his chest. “Then what’s going on? I like you. I thought you liked me. Things were going great.”
Grant reached up and tucked her hair behind her ear, a gentle gesture that made her heart thrum and her tension to melt away. At least until he said, “I’m not ready for someone like you. I’m sorry, Shannon. You deserve someone better.”
This time, when he tried to walk away, she let him.
Shannon managed to stumble next door and mutter a couple of words about what had happened.
“Did you say cake?” Ruth asked, holding onto Shannon’s elbow like she was drunk and couldn’t be trusted to stand.
“Big chocolate cake. I know it’s chocolate because I slammed a knife right into the center of it.” Everything in Shannon’s life came into sharp focus then. She’d opened the envelopes and found all the things she did to pamper herself—massage certificate, free step classes, the works. Grant had said the ranch wives had put it together, and Shannon had gotten angry then.
Angry at herself. Angry at herself for putting so much pressure on Grant to come up with the perfect surprise for her. She’d never told him about the step classes, though they weren’t a secret. But he’d obviously gone to outside sources looking for help with the surprise.
“Why didn’t I just tell him I wanted him to take me to dinner and hold me on the couch?” She looked at Ruth, just now realizing she wasn’t in her own house. “Why do I make every relationship so complicated?”
“Let’s get you home and we’ll talk.” Ruth guided her to the door and into her own house. She set about cleaning up the scattered coupons and envelopes, as well as removing the vertical knife from the center of the cake. She cut two large slices and put them on paper plates before handing one to Shannon. “All right, tell me about it.”
Shannon didn’t know what else to say. She stabbed a large forkful of cake and shoved it in her mouth. Whoever had made this was a master with sugar and cocoa and milk. Whoever had made this wasn’t Grant.
That made her angry too, and she set the slab of cake aside. She’d been out to the ranch several times over the past weeks, but she’d only met the owners, Megan and Landon. She wasn’t even sure what a ranch wife was, but somehow she really wanted to be one.
She hadn’t told Grant that either. In her experience, gushing about how much she wanted children usually drove men away. Of course, she’d done that without mentioning any of her dreams, or how loud her biological clock was ticking.
“I just want to know why,” she finally said. Ruth nodded like she’d been privy to all the inner workings of Shannon’s brain. “I didn’t do anything wrong this time. We met five weeks ago. I saw him on the weekends. I never said anything about getting married, having kids, quitting my job. Nothing.”
“You want to quit your job?”
Shannon shook her head, frustrated. “No. I mean, yes. I’d quit to have a family.” She sighed, the end of the sound
quaking. “I really want a family.” She’d known that—had for a while. But she’d never said it out loud. It sounded different coming out of her mouth than it did circling in her head.
Ruth got up and took Shannon’s cake back into the kitchen. “Shannon, do you really want a family with him?”
Numbness spread through her, and she held back the tears. “I don’t know.” She really wanted to talk to Hannah or her mom. Her mom went to bed early, but Hannah would still be awake. Shannon didn’t know if she could handle the silence from her sister if she called, so she didn’t make a move toward her phone.
Ruth returned and crouched in front of Shannon. “Are you in love with him?”
She shook her head, a single tear splashing down the side of her face. “It’s been five weeks.” She swiped at the tears, embarrassed at how easily she’d fallen apart. She hadn’t even cried when Hannah had said all those terrible things and then stopped talking to her.
“So what? I fell in love with Richard in a weekend.”
Shannon inhaled, trying to figure out how she felt and to order her thoughts. “But that’s not me. I’ve never done that. I don’t think I’ve ever even been in love.” She met Ruth’s eyes, and they were kind and clear. “What does being in love feel like?”
Ruth smiled the way Shannon imagined her mother would. She reached out and wiped Shannon’s tears too. “About like this, honey.”
By Monday, Shannon had fixed exactly one problem in her life: the summer school afternoon program. She’d gotten someone else to step in last-minute, and she’d met with the woman for two hours on Sunday evening.
In fact, she’d worked all of Sunday, the idea of going to church where she might see Grant too painful. She couldn’t help wondering if he’d stayed away too.
She sat in her office, the first day well underway, finally with a moment to think. But she didn’t like thinking. All her brain did was remind her of how utterly alone she was and that she’d never be a mother. She hadn’t even realized how far she’d fallen with Grant. Didn’t know she’d started to imagine living with him on the ranch and raising their children to romp through the fields and ride horses out to the stream and throw a ball with Bear, Theo, and Bullseye.