"Even though I could not remember your face, I knew that I loved you. I felt one day I would meet the woman of my dreams, and I would know her at once."
"Did we meet while you were on your quest?"
"Yes. While I was on my quest I dreamed of you each night. I suppose it was because our meeting was close at hand."
"This is all very unreal, Tajarez."
"I know it must seem that way to you, but sometimes there are happenings that cannot be explained by everyday rules. Our love and our meeting is one of those."
"Tell me about when we first met. Did you know me at once? How did I react to you?"
"You had been abducted by two Indians. When I first saw you, you were fighting for you life. You had one of the men's knife and had stabbed him in the arm. I saw that you were in trouble and I killed both of the men who had held you captive. I could not tell what you looked like, as you were covered in mud, and at first I did not even like you, because you belonged to the race I had sworn to hate."
"What did you do with me?"
"I took you with me because I could not just leave you to die in the wilderness. I did not like even to touch you."
"How strange this all sounds," Mara said, trying to imagine herself as the girl Tajarez spoke of. "Then what happened, Tajarez?" she urged.
"I made camp that night and was forced to sleep beside you and share my robe with you so you would not freeze to death. The next morning I left you and bathed in the river, wanting to wash every trace of you from my body."
"Did you make love to me?"
Tajarez laughed. "No. I hated even the thought of touching you, and I was on a quest and forbidden to lie with a woman."
"I see, or I think I see. Tell me more."
"Well," he said, trying to think about his story when his mind was shifting to the soft skin that brushed against his body, "when I returned to camp, you too had bathed in the river. When I saw you were the woman of my dreams, I felt as if I had been struck by a lightning bolt from the sky. You were my love, the woman I had dreamed of, and you belonged to the hated white race. I had never seen hair the golden color, nor eyes of green. Can you imagine how I felt? You were my love, and you did not know me."
"Oh Tajarez, what a beautiful story. Did you bring me home with you?"
"I am skipping much of the story. I took you to a fort and left you, although it tore at my heart to do so. It was as if I had left a part of myself behind."
"But how did I get here?"
"It was not until a year later that I found you. I had searched for you, not knowing where to find you in St. Louis."
"You have not said. Did I love you at that time?"
"Yes, you did, beloved. You told me before I took you to the fort that you loved me."
"Why did you leave me and then come back for me? I do not understand."
"When I returned home, Sagas demanded to know where the Golden One was."
"Who is the Golden One?"
"You are the Golden One, Mara."
"I do not understand."
"Mara, there is an old prophecy that was given my people hundreds of years ago. For long years the Lagonda people have waited for you to come. I will quote you the prophecy."
When the Golden One comes there will be peace and plenty
The past will be revealed to the few and the many
One man will die; another shall weep.
There will be love where the Golden One sleeps.
"What does it mean, Tajarez," Mara asked, feeling uneasy about the prophecy.
"Mara, since you have come to us our crops in the fields have been abundant. Never has the hidden valley known such bounty. And you have been helping Sagas reveal the past."
"Do you mean the hieroglyphics?"
"Yes."
"Who was the man who died?"
"That would be my father."
"And the one who wept?"
Tajarez was quiet for a long time. When he spoke, Mara could hear the anguish in his voice.
"I was that man, Mara."
She touched his face softly, "Why did you weep, Tajarez," she asked, unable to imagine him weeping.
"I do not want to speak of it, Mara. I am not proud that I wept like some woman. Loving you has caused this weakness in me."
Mara could hear the pain in his voice, so she decided not to press him. "Tell me how we were married."
"I married you once in your brother David's home in St. Louis, and then again here in the City, where my father made you my wife."
"Tajarez, I married you twice, and I have loved you twice."
"Never stop loving me Mara, for if you do, I could not live."
"Tajarez, I loved you even when I did not know who I was, or who you were."
He kissed her cheek and his hand moved up to her breast. "No more questions tonight, beloved," he whispered. His hand closed over her breasts that were swollen with milk and Mara cried out, since even his gentle touch was painful to her.
"I am sorry, beloved. I should have remembered how painful it was for you when you weaned Hamez and Tamera."
Pushing the strap of her petticoat aside he tenderly brushed her swollen breasts with his lips first one then the other, in such a beautiful gesture that Mara's heart melted.
"I will let you sleep now, Mara. You must be in pain from the fullness of your breasts."
Mara did not want to sleep. Her body wanted to find a oneness with her husband. She could now allow herself to surrender to him with no feelings of guilt. Her hand traveled over his chest, feeling the tautness beneath her fingers.
"Mara, I would not continue if you wish to find sleep," he said in a raspy voice.
She smiled to herself, feeling a surge of power. She was finding out that she had the power to move this man. Her hand drifted down to his waist, and she turned her head to find his lips. At first his lips were unyielding, until her hand moved over his firm, flat stomach.
"Mara," he groaned as his lips covered hers, devouring her mouth with a savage kiss. "I warned you," he said, rolling her over and covering her body with his.
"I dare to play with fire," she murmured in his ear.
"I will dare to quench your hunger," he said, driving his manhood into her welcoming body. "Beloved, you have the power to make me your slave," he whispered against her lips.
Their lovemaking was frantic as each of them took and gave to the other. Afterwards Tajarez held her tightly in his arms and Mara curled up contentedly.
"Did I cause you pain, beloved?"
"No."
They were quiet for a long time, needing no words to tell each other what they felt. Time passed as they touched and caressed one another.
"Mara, I will never allow you to leave this valley again, unless I am with you. If your brother David wants to see you, he will have to come here."
"I cannot imagine wanting to leave. I will be content to live with you here for the rest of my life. My one wish is that I might remember the past."
"There are some things I would not mind if you never remembered."
"Such as?"
"I would be a fool to tell you, would I not?"
Mara sighed contentedly and closed her eyes. Let the past stay dead, she thought. She had the future. She had love. She had the heart of the dark, handsome king of the Seven Cities.
The next morning Tajarez made arrangements for Andrew to be presented to the people of the Lagonda tribe. Word had spread throughout the Seven Cities that the queen had been found and that there was a new prince.
By late afternoon a crowd of people was gathered at the steps of the palace, waiting for the king and queen to appear before them.
Mara walked down the steps to stand beside Tajarez, who was holding Andrew in his arms. When the people saw her a loud uproar reached her. Looking down into the sea of faces, she felt nervous and unsure. When Tajarez held up his hand silence moved over the crowd.
"Do not be nervous, Mara. Everyone here loves you," Tajarez said, knowing what sh
e was feeling.
Mara gave him a weak smile, and raised her head proudly.
"My people," Tajarez called out. "I give you the queen, who has been safely returned to us."
The noise from the crowd was deafening, and Mara could see the joy on the faces of the people. Not knowing what to do with such a warm welcome, she raised her hand and smiled. She felt warmed by the love that reached her from the people of the Lagonda tribe.
"See how much you are loved, Mara," Tajarez said near her ear. Once more Tajarez raised his hand for silence. "I know you are all aware that your queen has been missing for many months. I want to assure you she is in good health. She has, however, lost all memory of the past. I am told by Tabo that her memory could return at any time. I tell you this because I know you have been concerned for her."
Tajarez paused. Raising Andrew over his head, he spoke in a commanding voice. "I give you Andrew, my son, and your new prince."
Once again the crowds went wild in their joy. The day was cold, so Tajarez led Mara back into the palace. Andrew was taken to the nursery and Tajarez took Mara's hand and led her up onto the raised dais, and sat her down in one of the chairs.
Mara looked at him, puzzled.
"There is someone who wishes to seek audience with you, Mara."
"What does this mean, Tajarez? What is expected of me?"
"Falon and Matio seek to petition you. They need permission that only you can give them."
"I do not understand."
"Falon belongs to you and needs your permission before she can marry."
Mara saw Matio and Falon approaching her. She felt as if she were stepping into someone else's place. The golden crown of the double cobra rested on her head, but it did not give her any insight into what her duties as queen were.
Falon and Matio bowed their heads and looked at Mara inquiringly. A heavy silence hung over the anteroom as Mara wondered what to say. Seeing she was going to receive no help from Tajarez, she spoke.
"What would you ask of me, Falon?"
Falon looked into her eyes hesitantly. "I seek permission to marry Matio of the royal guard, my queen."
Mara's gaze moved to the young warrior, whom she recognized as the one who had come to her at the cabin.
"Matio, do you love Falon?"
"It is so, my queen," he said, bowing his dark head.
"Falon, do you love Matio?"
Falon's eyes became soft. "It is so, my queen."
"Do you ask to be released from my service?"
Falon shook her head and blinked her eyes. "No, my queen, I am greatly honored to wait upon you."
"I see. Matio, I give Falon to you as your bride. I will charge you to care for her, for if you do not you will incur my displeasure."
The young couple looked at their queen with joy on their faces. "I will care for her very well my queen," Matio said.
"I have something to say to you, Matio," Tajarez spoke up. He had been silently watching the proceedings and thought that Mara handled herself very well as the queen she was.
Matio bowed his head, thinking he was about to be reprimanded for the injustice he had charged against his queen. He had been expecting it for a long time, and he dreaded that the time was now.
"I await your displeasure, my king," he said, standing tall and proud.
Tajarez arched an eyebrow. "My displeasure? Nay, Matio, I wish to honor you for your devotion to finding your queen. Without you, I doubt we would ever have located her."
Matio's face lit up and he looked uncertain for a moment. This was not what he had expected. His heart swelled with pride as he looked into the eyes of his king.
"I will state that you are to be honored, Matio. As of this day I am placing twelve warriors under your care. See to their training. I know you will do well."
Matio could hardly contain his joy. "I am honored by your faith in me, my king. I will strive to do my best."
Tajarez smiled at the young warrior. "You have only one flaw to overcome, Matio. I would charge you not to believe in first impressions. Seek deeper for the truth."
Matio's face burned red, but no one but he and the king knew he had received his reprimand, after all. "It is so, my king. I will remember."
31
I remember, I remember, happy days of years
gone by.
I remember, I remember where my future lies.
Tajarez was standing before the window, watching the City below him. His thoughts were troubled. When he was with Mara he was aware that she would try very hard to remember their past life together, but when he made love to her in the early morning hours, she did not surrender herself to him completely as she once had. He still wished for things to be as they once were between them. What if she never remembered? He felt another's presence, and he looked up to see Sagas standing beside him.
"Where is Mara?"
"I am told she is lying down. Where have you been all these months?" Tajarez demanded sourly. "I have made inquiries, but no one seemed to know where you were."
Sagas removed the heavy fur robe he wore and tossed it on a nearby cushion. His face showed his hundred and twenty-some-odd years. His usually immaculate white robe was stained and dirty.
"I have been in the mountains. I told you this before I went away.”
"Great Father, you were in the mountains all winter? Have you no care for your health?"
Saga's black eyes snapped. "I was in no danger. I must go where I am called. So, Mara has lost her memory."
"Yes, and you would have known it sooner if you had been here when I brought her back," Tajarez said angrily.
"I knew it before you even found her. If she had heeded my words and worn the medallion, she would not have lost her memory," Sagas said matter-of-factly.
"The medallion! If she were to put it on now, would she remember everything?" Tajarez asked hopefully.
"Of course."
"Then we shall find the medallion and have her put it on."
"It will not be pleasant for her. Are you sure you want to subject her to that?"
"What do you mean?"
"When she starts to remember, her past life will pass before her and it will be as if she is living it."
"Would that be bad?"
"When she remembers her parents' death and your father's it will be as if they just happened. And what about when she almost lost her baby, and when Anias took her?"
"What shall I do?"
Sagas walked toward the door. "I am going to bathe, and when I return I suggest we consult Mara. And if I know her, which I do, she will want to remember."
Mara was standing on the balcony. The cold winds rustled in the trees and gathered the snow and whipped it about in a great white torrent. Hearing the bedroom door open, she turned and saw Tajarez enter with an old man.
The old man stood straight and tall. His hair was as white as the robe he wore. Looking into his eyes, she remembered him as the old man in her dreams. Ignoring Tajarez, she walked over to the old man and took his hand, an instinct that startled her, but the old man simply smiled.
"So long have you been away, Mara, that these old eyes have hungered for the sight of your face."
"I am still not all returned. Help me." Why had she asked him for help? Who was he?
"Where is the medallion now, Mara?"
She put her hand to her face, trying to remember. "I put it with the gowns I brought with me. I do not know where they are."
"I had them taken to the storage room," Tajarez said. He ran into the hall and told one of the guards to fetch the medallion.
"It has been a long way home for you, Mara, but it is almost over," the old man said.
"I dreamed about you. When I was frightened you came to me in a dream. You told me not to despair, that you would be beside me."
"Yes, I know."
"It was a dream, was it not? Thinking back, it seemed so real at the time. It was as if you were in the room with me—and you took me to see . . . Tajarez!"
Tajarez had returned and he handed the medallion to Sagas.
"Mara," the old man said, "I have it within my power to return the past to you. I must warn you, however, that it will be very painful for you. You will relive all that happened to you that was memorable. Some of the experiences will be pleasant; others will hurt you. It is for you to decide."
"I want to get my memory back. I will do anything. How long will it take?"
"Hours, days, who can say? You will be in a trance and must not be disturbed for any reason, for should you awaken before the transition is completed, you will be lost between the two worlds, and not even I can help you."
"I will take the chance."
"No, Mara!" Tajarez cried. "I did not know it would be so dangerous. Your memory is not that important."
"It is important to me. Please, do not try to stop me. I would do anything you asked of me, but this I must do for myself."
Tajarez took her hand. "I could forbid it."
"You could, but you will not," Sagas said. "Clear this whole floor of everyone. Bar the door to the garden and allow no one to enter it. Post guards at the stairs and let no one come up the stairs. There must be absolute quiet," Sagas said with authority.
"I am going to remain with her," Tajarez said.
"I expected you would, as will I," Sagas said.
Tajarez left the room. First he sent a servant to prepare a big meal for Mara. Then he ordered the second floor vacated, and even the nursery was moved downstairs. He then had the garden sealed off and stationed a guard at the gates. Guards were posted at the foot of the stairs, as Sagas had ordered.
After Mara had eaten and the dishes were cleared away, she sat down on the bed and Tajarez sat beside her. "Mara, there is still time to change your mind."
"No, I have made my decision."
The palace seemed as quiet as a tomb as Sagas pulled up a cushion and sat down beside Mara.
"Mara, you will know fear, heartache, and grief. Tajarez and I will be unable to help you in any way."
"I am ready."
Tajarez leaned forward and kissed her lips softly, and then Sagas stood up and slowly placed the golden medallion over her head. As the medallion fell between Mara's breasts, it felt as if it had burned her skin.
Savage Splendor (Savage Lagonda 2) Page 34