They chatted more as Jason drove, Anthony asking how Jason was and Jason responding with the truth. He was ok, a little tired from training. A short while later Jason pulled into a parking space, in front of a small bar called Mony and Ronny’s. Getting out of the jeep Anthony glanced at Jason who smiled at him before pulling open the door and allowing Anthony to step inside. the inside was loud, music blared from a jukebox while the patrons of the bar laughed and chatted, in the background Anthony could make out the sounds of someone playing pool. As Jason stepped in behind him a girl; a skinny bunny wearing a tight green shirt that showed off her rather, ample breasts greeted them. “HELLO! WELCOME TO MONY AND RONNY’S. JUST 2 FOR YOU?”
Anthony allowed Jason to talk before following him and the bunny through the crowd before sitting down at a table. “We’ll just have 2 waters for now. But I’ll be getting something with the food.”
The bunny nodded and vanished into the crowd leaving Anthony and Jason alone to look through the menu. Scanning the menu Anthony smiled as he found that several of the items piqued his interest before finally setting on a grilled burger with onion rings. Setting his menu down Anthony looked around taking in the walls which were covered in people signatures and doodles, while across from them a large TV showed a random soccer game. He did his best to keep his eyes off of Jason but somehow found his eyes drawn to the larger turtle; drawn to his muscles, his skin……..his eyes. He shook his head. This NEEDED to stop. When the waitress came back they placed their orders before watching the bunny take their menus and vanish into the crowd for a moment before returning to hand Jason his beer. “So…….”
Anthony blinked as Jason spoke. “Treat any interesting people today?”
Anthony shrugged. “Not really. Today was more about catching up on paper work and reports.”
Jason nodded, taking another sip of his beer. “so…….can I ask you something?”
Anthony nodded and watched as Jason shifted a little bit in his seat. “what…..made you get into psychology?”
Anthony smiled as he leaned back in his chair. “well……..I’ve always been smart. And my father always encouraged me to do something that was a challenge to me. math was easy, science was boring, but people…….people are hard.”
Jason blinked at him before shaking his head. “I don't understand.”
Anthony smiled and scanned the crowd before gesturing to a couple sitting in a booth behind them. “What can you tell me about them, just by looking at them?”
Jason shifted, turning to glance at the couple before shrugging. “Well…….she’s obviously bored; she probably wanted to go to a nice restaurant. Oh she’s wearing his sports jersey. Probably trying to make the best out of this crappy date. As for him……he’s texting his friends.”
Turning back to Anthony Jason raised an eyebrow as he found Anthony was shaking his head. “close but at the same time totally wrong. Look at the boyfriend, the one who keeps glancing downwards every few seconds. He’s checking his cellphone. Probably waiting for an important call. The girlfriend is the sports fan, notice how her eyes haven’t left the TV since you looked at her? Also the jersey belongs to her, but it’s several sizes to big because she recently lost a lot of weight. You can tell because of the way she bracelet she’s wearing; it’s a bracelet given to people who have undergone gastric bypass surgery in the last 6 months.”
Jason felt his eyes widen at Anthony’s words. “you got all that just from looking at them?”
Anthony nodded, smiling to Jason who continued to look stunned. “Jason I went to college for 8 years to learn how to read people; because unlike a lot of other things people are hard to understand.”
Jason continued to look at Anthony for several seconds before speaking. “what……when you look at me……what do you see?”
Anthony was silent for a moment as he took a sip from his water glass before speaking. “are you sure you want to know?”
Jason nodded, while taking a deep drink from his beer. Looking Jason up and down for a moment Anthony spoke. “I see a turtle who acts big and strong but in reality is scared and confused. The way you sit. It’s an attempt to remove yourself from the conversation; the way you lean back. It tells me you would rather observe my answers then listen to them.”
Jason rolled his eyes. “That sounds like complete bullcrap.”
Anthony raised an eyebrow before moving, leaning forward and grabbing Jason's wrist. “You hide your fears behind your cocky attitude but at your core……you’re scared.”
Jason felt his mouth go dry as Anthony looked him directly in the eyes. “you have trouble with your emotions not just handling them but processing them. that’s why you get angry so easily. Because you’re scared and you lash out, trying to push away everything that scares you.”
Jason moved, trying to tug his arm out of Anthony’s grasp only to find Anthony’s grip was surprisingly strong. “Don’t pull away Jason. Don't let fear and anger rule you. Even if you can't handle your feelings, there are people who can help. Don't……..you don't always have to run away from your fears.”
Jason felt his heart clench slightly as Anthony let go of his wrist. They sat in silence for several minutes while Jason processed what Anthony had said. Across from him Anthony watched him, his eyes roving over Jason's body taking in the constant fidgeting, the confused look on his face, the subtle clenching and unclenching of his hands. After several more minutes Anthony spoke. “this is why I don't date much.”
Jason looked up at him. Anthony sighed his shoulders slumping forward slightly. “it’s hard to date someone when you can tell they’re lying to you, or when they’re hiding something from you. It gets so hard to look them in the face when you know that just by telling them the truth you’ve hurt them. look……..”
Anthony shifted, moving to get out of the booth they were sitting in. “I’ve…..I’ve upset you. I’m sorry. I’ll just…….I’ll go. Ok? I’m sorry I ruined your night.”
Shifting to get out of his seat Anthony did his best to fight back the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes. He paused just long enough to dig some money out of his wallet and put it on the table, enough to cover his half of the bill. He could hear Jason saying something; but whether he was trying to get Anthony to stay or saying goodbye Anthony didn’t particularly know or care. He pushed through the crowds wanting to desperately be as far away from the bar as he could get.
Stepping out onto the street he took several deep breaths willing his heart to stop clenching. He made his way to the nearby bus stop and within 5 minutes was on his way back to his house. He was alone on the bus, the only other person besides him was the driver. Sitting at the very back Anthony pulled his knees against his chest and only then did he completely let go. He buried his face against his knees as large tears began to fall from his eyes. It wasn’t fair. Was did this always happen?! Why was he always drawn to men who he could never have? Why was he given such a mind if it would only push those he cared about away? why give him the hope to find love if he never would?
As the bus came to a stop he got off, drying his tears as he walked down the street before turning the corner and walking up his front lawn. Pushing the front door open Anthony didn’t even pause to take off his shoes, instead heading straight into the kitchen and the few bottles of booze he kept in the house. He didn’t even get a glass as he opened the first bottle, a large whipped Vodka; instead just pressing the cold glass to his lips and downing several mouthfuls of the disgustingly sweet drink. He coughed and gagged, scrambling to get himself a glass of water to was the taste of sugar and alcohol from his mouth. Swallowing the water Anthony sighed and sank down onto the kitchen floor.
What was the point? Why did he bother with any of this? What was the point of trying to make friends when all he ended up doing was hurting them? sighing again Anthony pulling his knees against his chest again. What had he done to deserve this? What had he done in a past life to deserve to be alone like this? He was so wrapped
up in his thoughts he didn’t hear the front door open. “Anthony?” he flinched, jerking sideways his heart thundering into a momentary panic at the possibility of an intruder. But his heart slowed as he found that it was just Jason who was standing over him looking worried. “Anthony?”
Anthony didn’t respond, instead sniffing loudly before trying to stand up. “go away.”
he didn’t get very far. Somehow the few mouthfuls of vodka he’s drunk were already affecting him, making him clumsy and uncoordinated. He staggered sideways, bumping into Jason who gripped his shoulders to help support him. “are drunk?”
Anthony groaned. “I guess.”
Next to him Jason chuckled. “wow, you’re a lightweight. Come on, let’s get you up to bed.”
Anthony couldn’t help but giggle slightly. “big tough Jason wants to get me into bed.”
Jason rolled his eyes and slowly helped Anthony up stairs. Pushing the door open to Anthony’s bedroom Jason slowly carried Anthony over, trying to help the older turtle walk properly. Anthony grunted as he tried to make his legs move correctly, but only succeeded in twisting his legs up in Jason; the effect was they both fell, landing on Anthony’s bed while the room around him spun violently for a moment. Closing his eyes Anthony did his best to relax, taking several deep breaths before opening his eyes again. as he did so he felt his breath hitch in his chest. Jason was there, on top of him, having falling in such a way that the larger turtle now straddled his hips. But it was Jason's face that made Anthony freeze, those beautiful green orbs that were fixed on his face, making his heart flutter and clench. His hands moved without thinking, gripped handfuls of Jason's shirt, trying to keep the larger turtle on top of him as a gentle whimper escaped his throat. He wanted this, dear god he wanted this so bad it almost hurt.
Jason blinked down at Anthony, startled slightly by the pained whimper that the purple turtle had let out. Slowly his eyes roved Anthony’s face, looking to see if he was in pain at all. He swallowed nervously, his mouth going dry as his eyes took in the gentle flecks of purple around Anthony’s face, greens lips, gentle brown eyes silently pleading with him. Again he swallowed. “Anthony…..how……..how drunk are you?”
Anthony groaned, shifting to lean up and gently nuzzle Jason's neck. “Enough to know I want this……not drunk enough that you should feel bad.”
Jason groaned as Anthony’s breath raced along his neck. He bit his lip, part of him wanted this. “Jason…..”
Jason shuddered as Anthony’s lips pressed against his neck, kissing the sensitive skin. He took several deep breaths before speaking. “I’m……not………gay.”
Anthony looked up at him, his grip tightening on Jason's shirt. Again Jason repeated himself. “I’m not gay.”
Slowly Anthony let go of Jason's shirt, closing his eyes as he found he was no longer able to stand the sight of Jason's face looking down at him. “I’m sorry…….i-”
but Anthony’s words were cut off as Jason's lips pressed against his. The kiss was a little clumsy, partly because Anthony was a little drunk and partly because Jason wasn't entirely sure how to kiss another man. Anthony groaned, his hands gripping the edges of Jason's shell, pulling him down onto of him. they broke apart, Anthony’s eyes opening to scan Jason's face. “Jason?”
Jason closed his eyes for a moment. “I’m….not…..gay. but……….”
Slowly his eyes opened again, silently pleading with Anthony to understand the complex typhoon of emotions that was rushing through him making him feel dizzy, excited, nervous, pissed off, and scared all at the same time. “I’m……..I’m………I’m not going to run away from this. I’m……not going to……..be scared.”
Anthony bit his lip. “are…….are you sure you want……me?”
Jason nodded. “yes. Just…….just show me what to do.”
Jason shivered as he felt Anthony’s hand shift, slowly moving from his chest, tracing his arm before gently gripping his wrist. Jason but his lip, feeling as Anthony gently guided his hand to the back of Anthony’s head. Beneath him Anthony shifted, leaning in to nuzzle his neck again. “Shhhhh… just relax Jason. I promise……I won’t push you. We won’t do anything you don't want to.”
Jason took a deep breath but nodded. “O…ok.”
He groaned, shuddering slightly as Anthony shifted, their hips grinding gently together making Jason groaned again. A moment later Jason leaned down, capturing Anthony’s lips again. He had to admit……..kissing Anthony wasn’t as gross as he’d thought it would be. He’d expected Anthony’s lips to be rough, but they weren’t. He groaned and deepened the kiss a little his tongue moving instinctually out of his mouth to flick across Anthony’s surprisingly soft lips. He shifted, pushing himself down against Anthony’s chest, grinding their hips together enjoying how it felt. As they broke apart he could feel Anthony’s hands moving, slowly circling his waist, playing with the edge of his shirt. Gently he leaned in to Anthony’s ear. “Go ahead.”
He felt Anthony move, gripping the edges of his shirt before pulling the shirt up and off of Jason exposing his sculpted chest and stomach. Anthony bit his lip as his hands slowly explored Jason's muscles; feeling them ripple slightly as he touched them. Anthony groaned, how could Jason have so many muscles? He bit his lip again, painfully conscious that he didn’t have nearly as many muscles as Jason did.
Yes he ate healthy foods, and did light exercise everyday but…..that didn’t give him the rock hard, perfectly defined muscles that made up Jason's chest. He whimpered slightly as Jason moved to pull off his shirt. He still wanted this, still wanted Jason but……..he shuddered as Jason pulled off his shirt, throwing it into the darkness before looking down at him. He whimpered again as Jason looked at him, his eyes scanning Anthony’s chest and stomach. Anthony groaned as Jason captured his lips again; this time taking charge of the kiss as his tongue pushed into Anthony’ mouth, slowly exploring it while his hands drew small shapes in Anthony’s stomach.
Breaking the kiss Anthony panted, it felt so good. Jason's weight pushed down on him making him feel secure but at the same time…….dominated. It sent a message to him; Jason was the one in control. He whimpered as Jason became bolder, their kisses becoming for aggressive while at the same time Jason's hands shifted downwards pushing and tugging at Anthony’s belt before dropping the length of fabric to the floor. He panted as Jason leaned in, nuzzling his neck while his hands….. Anthony whimpered as Jason's hands slipped past his pant’s waistline moving under the fabric before slowly pulling them off until gravity tugged them the rest of the way down leaving Anthony in his boxers.
Against his will Anthony shuddered as Jason's eyes looked him up and down before leaning in to claim his lips again. Anthony groaned, wrapping his arms around Jason's shoulders as their bodies ground together. Jason grinned to himself, reviling on how badly Anthony wanted to keep the contact between their bodies. His hands shifted, pulling his own pants off, freeing his legs from their confines so they were both in only their underwear. He pulled back, his breath seeming to hitch in his chest as his mind began to catch up with his body. He was in his underwear pressed against Anthony’s body while……. His breath began to becoming panicked. What was going on, this was so unlike him. Beneath him Anthony shifted reaching up to grip Jason’ hand. “Shhhhh, it’s ok Jason. Just breathe. Ok?”
Jason nodded leaning in against Anthony while taking several deep breaths. He felt Anthony shift, tugging at his shoulders and arms; pulling him away from the edge of the bed and into the center, before rolling their bodies so Jason was no longer on top but now laying on his side looking at Anthony, who nuzzled his neck. “It’s ok Jason. Just relax breath. Focus on my voice ok.”
Jason nodded, closing his eyes while he took several deep breaths. “Are you ok Jason? Do you want to continue?”
Jason nodded, gripping Anthony’s hand a little tighter. “Yeah I……I want to keep going. I…….just…….I’m…..”
Anthony nodded, continuing to nuzzle Jas
on's neck. “Do you want me to take a lead for a little while?”
Jason bit his lip but nodded. He felt Anthony shift; his had slowly exploring Jason's chest and hips; making Jason groan gently. “That feels……good Anthony.”
Anthony nodded, his tongue flicking out to lick Jason's neck. “I know…..that’s why I’m doing it.”
he continued, gently massaging Jason's chest, stomach and hips, making Jason groaned and press in closer. Anthony took a chance, leaning in to kiss Jason's jaw line and neck making the larger turtle moan gently. “So……..what now?”
Anthony shifted, “now……this.”
His hands ghosted lower, running against the bulge in Jason's boxers making Jason moan a little louder. “A…A….Anthony…..”
Anthony repeated the movement noting that as Jason again moaned, the bulge gave a small throb. Lightning bolted through Anthony’s body as Jason’s hands moved, going to the bulge in Anthony’s own boxers, gently squeezing and rubbing sending ragged shudders of pleasure through Anthony’s body. They stayed like this for a while, their movements sending jolts of pleasure rippling through their bodies, making them both moan and whimper. The sounds of Anthony’s moans, emboldened Jason; making him grip Anthony’s organ tighter while moving his hand faster. The effect was instant, Anthony’s head tilted back as a loud hiss escaped his mouth, while his body shuddered for a moment. Jason grinned as he felt Anthony’s bulge change, a sign that he was finally excited enough that his body had released his organ. He pressed forward gripping Anthony’s organ through his underwear slowly stroking the organ making Anthony quiver and moan. Before shoving the last article of clothing down Anthony’s legs before throwing it into the darkness and returning to Anthony’s organ. “J…J….Jason!”
Anthony’s voice egged him on, making him even bolder. He shifted, gripping Anthony’s shoulder and spinning the purple turtle around so Anthony’s shell was against his chest, while he propped himself up on his elbow half laying on top of Anthony, who shuddered and moaned as Jason's hand began to move faster. Anthony whimpered his hands scrambling to grip fistfuls of his blankets while pleasure lashed and raged through his body. His back arched against Jason's chest his head tilting back offering Jason his neck; which the red turtle took, nuzzling Anthony’s neck while his hand worked. Something had changed; he wasn't nervous or afraid anymore he was……enthralled. Something about Anthony had enthralled him. He pressed down against Anthony’s body, pinning the slim turtle to the bed while his hand continued to pump Anthony’ organ making Anthony whimper and shudder.
The Lives We Lead (A Student In Need Book 2) Page 10