“I met one from Chicago,” another soldier said. “He walked for miles just to bring me some soda crackers and a little bread. I hadn’t had nothin’ to eat for four days.”
“A man from Rhode Island did the same for me,” another one said.
“But didn’t he first give you what for?” the disgruntled soldier asked. “Didn’t he tell you that you was to blame for all the sufferin’? That his cause was the right one?”
“No. He just treated me like I was his brother. Sure was hard to think of that Northern man as an enemy. Made me wish I’d never fought in the first place.”
Emily listened, tears in her eyes. That which she prayed for most for this nation was reconciliation. Apparently God was answering those prayers, one man at a time. He was using the delegates of the Christian Commission to do so.
Like rain-soaked wool blankets on the battlefield, silence covered them all. Finally, Emily dared to speak. “It doesn’t matter where you are from or what you may have done in the past. God loves you. He waits for you to come to Him, just like your fathers, mothers and sweethearts back home.”
John nodded. So did Josiah. Emily prayed the others would understand in time. But the person she thought of most at that moment was not even in the room.
Where is Dr. Mackay tonight? Has he been called to some emergency, or is he leaving me to fend for myself? She figured it was the latter, for the anger had been quite visible on his face when her father had spoken of Baltimoreans being arrested without probable cause. Yet she had also seen an almost affable expression when he’d offered her his hand. Emily could not help but wonder which side was the true man.
* * *
He watched her through the crack in the door. There she sat, Bible on her lap, between the rows of iron cots. The woman held obvious sympathy for rebs, and yet every officer, every doctor in this hospital, thought well of her.
Even me, he thought. Too well, in fact.
She was drawing him in with all her talk of love and forgiveness. Evan told himself to be careful. That carriage ride had been enough to show him the danger. He wouldn’t deny the fact that he thought her a pretty little lass. Any man would, but she made him think of things he shouldn’t be thinking. Guilt had stabbed him the moment he’d taken her hand.
Mary is my love. She always will be.
Still, he continued to covertly watch. His protective nature told him to take up residence in the room, especially when he saw how close she was to the rebel major. But I am through with rescuing her. The guard on duty tonight was a trustworthy man. He’d be awake all night. If there was any trouble, he could come to her aid.
And the major will be gone on the morrow, he reminded himself.
The Georgia corporal was now saying something. She was nodding and smiling. Evan couldn’t hear what they were discussing but considering the Scripture and the look on her face, he was fairly certain mercy and pardon were part of it.
A rock lodged in his throat. He tried to swallow it back. Would it be that it was all that simple, he thought. You cannot undo what sins have been done. I know that better than anyone.
He turned from the door. Another night of restlessness and regret lay before him.
* * *
Emily was anxious about being alone that night but thankfully the hours passed peacefully. The men snored heavily as the terrors of the battlefield were forgotten, at least for a time. She spent the evening walking quietly among the beds, straightening covers and swatting away flies.
The sun rose over the harbor, and the inky, black water lightened to a shade of bluish gray. Emily watched from a window as the wharf stirred to life. Ships were loaded, anchors drawn.
“Do you like the sea?” she heard Adam ask. His voice was still fragile but stronger than it had been.
“Not particularly,” she said, going to him. “I have always preferred green fields or mountains.”
He coughed. “I love the sea. Was raised by it. Lookin’ forward to returning.”
“I am certain you are.”
She smiled at him. His eyes showed weakness, but he managed to give her one in return.
“I haven’t thanked you for what you did for me.”
“There is no need. I am pleased to see you are improving.”
“Thank that Yankee doc for what he done.”
“I will, but you can tell him yourself. He will be by directly to examine you.”
And he was. Evan’s neatly trimmed side whiskers and newly laundered shirt gave him a fresh appearance but his cutting looks and particularly sharp tone soured the morning rounds.
“Change this bandage before you go,” he ordered. “And bring me a bucket of water!”
Exhausted as she was, Emily did her best to respond pleasantly. She carried out his instructions, then told him, “Sergeant Cooper spoke with me at length this morning. He wishes to thank you.”
A grunt was all she got in return.
“I wish to thank you, as well. You are a gifted physician, Dr. Mackay. I feel it is my privilege to serve under you.”
His eyes widened in disbelief. She wondered if her look was the same. My privilege to serve under you? Where had those words come from?
“’Twas God that saved him,” he said. “Not me.”
Emily blinked, still in shock over her own words, now further with his. So he does acknowledge where healing comes from. “That is true, but He used you to do so.” She decided to take the opportunity to thank him for his intervention at the funeral. “My family, my friends, we are all very grateful.”
He crossed his arms over his chest as if he wanted her to be certain he held no Southern sympathies.
Do not worry, she was tempted to say. I know where you stand.
“I did so because of Mrs. Ward,” he said.
Emily blinked again. “For Julia?”
“In her condition she shouldn’t see her husband carted off to jail.”
So that was it. If he had sent those soldiers, this explained why he had changed his mind. She tried to be gracious. “Thank you. I, too, was concerned. Her brother is, as well.”
Dr. Mackay’s jaw twitched. Something passed across his face that Emily could not interpret. He reached for her elbow, tugged her a little closer. Her stomach fluttered when he bent low to her ear.
“He is on the list,” he said. “The ward master will call for him within the hour.”
She gulped back her emotions. So Edward’s suspicions proved true. “He knows,” she said. “He told me so last night. He asked me to keep his sister from the room.”
A look of compassion shone on his face. Emily was so struck by it that all she could do was stare.
“Make certain she doesn’t enter the room when they are being called,” he told her. “Have that husband of hers promptly escort her home, though hopefully, the major will be gone before she arrives.”
For the first time, she believed his orders were truly out of concern, not politically motivated. He was still holding on to her elbow. He must have realized it, for he suddenly let go.
“If there is any trouble, alert me immediately.”
“I will.”
He looked past her. “Go on now,” he said. “The ward master has arrived.”
Emily turned. An older, overweight Federal officer stood in the doorway. He had his list in hand. A hush fell over the room as soon as the Confederate men noticed him.
“The following persons are hereby removed to Fort McHenry,” the man said. “Gather your personal items quickly.”
She held her breath, hoping against certainty. The first name was announced.
“Major Edward R. Stanton...”
Emily had still an hour before Julia would arrive. Biting back her grief, she went to assist him. Edward wished to wear his uniform, so she helped him into it. The coat now practically swallowed him, particularly the empty left sleeve. She fastened what remained of the buttons.
“I will keep you in my prayers, Eddie.”
He leaned
forward and kissed her cheek. “Farewell, Emmy.”
John and Josiah were called, as well. Dr. Mackay was quickly administering the last of the medication. Rebekah had arrived and was assisting the others. In a matter of moments the selected men fell into a line. Some were on crutches, some on the arms of their comrades. They each touched their caps and offered thanks to Emily as she moved among them.
She blinked back tears, wished each one of them well. Surrounded by armed guards, they prepared to march. When a Federal soldier pulled back the door, Emily glanced down the corridor. To her horror, Sam and Julia were approaching.
They are early!
She hurried for them but was too late. Julia and Sam took one look at the mixture of freshly pressed bluecoats among rags and knew exactly what was happening. She immediately went pale.
“No! Samuel, please! Not Edward!”
Emily stepped in, moving to block her friend’s view of the men preparing to march. “Let Sam see to him, Julia. It’s better for Edward that way. Come with me.”
Sam transferred his wife’s hand to hers. “Go with Emily, sweetheart.”
Shaking, Julia broke down completely. “Tell him I love him....”
“I will.”
He hurried for the ward. Emily led her friend in the opposite direction.
“Oh, Em, what if Edward can’t make the march? It’s three miles!”
“There will be stewards attending them. If there is any trouble, the physicians at the fort will see to him.” She tried her best to sound calm, but in truth Emily was just as upset as Julia. It always pained her to see men transferred, but today was especially hard.
Tears streamed down Julia’s cheeks. One of the supply rooms was unlocked, so Emily took her there. A table and two chairs offered a place to sit. Some of the commission volunteers must have been rolling bandages, for the table was full of them. She settled her friend in a seat and offered her a clean handkerchief. Julia wiped her eyes. She was trying to bring her emotions under control, but Emily knew the task was difficult. Fear laced her voice.
“First they took my father. Then they took Samuel. Now they are taking my brother.”
Both Dr. Stanton and Sam had spent time at the fort during the beginning of the war because the Federal army had suspected them of disloyalty.
“But they came home, Julia,” Emily gently reminded her. “God took care of them. He will take care of Edward, as well.”
“I want to believe that....” She cried into her handkerchief.
“I know it is difficult. I am sorry. I wish it didn’t have to be this way.”
“I hope he is paroled soon.”
“We’ll pray for that.”
Julia arched her back and winced. She shifted for a more comfortable position. Emily knew the pregnancy weighed heavily upon her. She tried to think of something to ease her mind.
“Edward and I spoke last night at length.”
“What about?”
She offered her a smile. “You. About how tenacious you are.”
Julia gave a quick laugh. Emily considered it a victory.
“No more than he,” Julia said.
“Oh, I am certain about that. I remember well the arguments between you both growing up.”
Julia shifted once more. She bit her lip and wiped her eyes. Her hands were still shaking, even harder now it seemed. Her color did not look good.
“Can I fetch you something?” Emily asked. “Anything?”
“No, but thank you. I do hope Sam will be able to speak with him.”
“I’m sure he will.”
The moments passed. Julia grew tired of sitting, of waiting. She began pacing the tiny room. Her own heart aching, Emily started placing the bandage rolls in a basket on the shelf. They could hear the thump, thump, thump of boots on boards. They knew the wards were emptying.
How many are being transferred today? How many will claim their beds?
All of a sudden, Julia’s cry pierced the air. “Oh! Oh, Em!”
Turning, Emily gasped in horror as her friend lifted her skirt from the floor. Julia’s petticoats were stained with a rush of water and blood.
Oh, dear Lord, no!
“It’s too early!” Julia gasped. “It’s too early!”
Panic seized her, but Emily did her best not to let it show. “Sit down!” she told her. Just then Rebekah walked in. Thankfully, Sam was with her.
“Emily, we thought we would—” She stopped, eyes widening as she recognized their friend’s distress. “Oh! What should we do?”
Sam immediately rushed to his wife’s side, but Emily had no idea what course to take. They had spent the last year nursing wounded men, not studying midwifery.
“Stay with her, both of you,” she commanded. “I’ll fetch help.”
She tore off as fast as she could in search of the one person in the hospital she believed would know what to do. Skirts flying, she raced back through the corridor. The Confederate men were making their way toward the main entrance. Evan was shouting orders to the guards at the front of the line.
“Get the carts for the weakest of them!”
“Dr. Mackay!”
He turned immediately, as if he already knew what was wrong. Emily had never before seen fear in his eyes, but she saw it then. “Where is she?” he demanded.
“The supply room!”
He took off, legs so long and fast that she could not keep up with him. By the time Emily reached the room, Rebekah had cleared the table. She had gathered blankets and the other necessary supplies and instruments. Sam was holding Julia’s hand, promising her that everything would be all right.
“Take him outside!” Dr. Mackay shouted at Emily. “And stay with him!”
No! She is my friend! I’ll not leave her alone!
One glance at Sam told her he was thinking the same. Before either of them could protest, Rebekah pushed them toward the door.
“Go,” she urged. “He knows what he is doing.”
The door shut solidly in front of them. Sam blinked, then took to pacing the narrow corridor. Emily felt the weight of fear and exhaustion as they came crashing down upon her. She sank back against the wall. Her mind was screaming.
I can’t do this anymore! I don’t want to do this anymore! The countless wounded! Stephen...Sally...Edward...now this!
At that moment Emily wanted to get as far away from this hospital, from this terrible war, as possible. She wanted a place of happiness, of frivolity, one where choosing a new ball gown or which volume of poetry to read was her biggest concern.
But as Sam paced about, systematically destroying the topper in his hands by twisting the brim, as Julia’s cries interspersed with Confederate footsteps from the hall, she knew she was exactly where God wanted her to be.
Emily pushed to her feet. Dr. Mackay’s commands to Rebekah could be heard from beyond the door.
“Put pressure here! Hold fast!”
When Julia let out a particularly sharp cry, Sam dashed for the door. Emily stopped him.
“Sam, the Good Lord is with her.”
He raked back his hair. She could see the fear in his eyes. “Of all places...a Federal hospital?”
She tried to reassure him. “Dr. Mackay is the best physician I know.”
His left eyebrow arched. “Do you trust him?”
Their past history raced through her mind, the scowls, the abrasive, unyielding personality. He is a Yankee, a Federal soldier! One who makes it quite obvious what he thinks of all of us. Get your wife, Sam, she was tempted to say. We will take her to our own kind.
Faith, however, won out over fear. Dr. Mackay had expressed concern for Julia before and time and again Emily had witnessed his medical skill. Perhaps God had allowed these circumstances for a specific reason, for Julia’s benefit. “Do I trust him? In matters such as these...yes. I know he will do everything he can.”
Sam’s mouth shifted with emotion. “I love her, Em.”
“I know you do. And she knows that,
as well.”
He sighed.
“Come on. Let’s pray for her.”
After doing so, they continued to wait. Both realized they should notify Julia’s parents concerning what was happening, yet neither of them wanted to leave.
The solution presented itself when Trudy and Elizabeth rounded the corner. Unaware of the emergency, they had come, baskets in hand, to restock their supplies.
“Em!” Elizabeth said. “What is going on?”
She quickly explained and Elizabeth offered to fetch Dr. Stanton.
“Joshua is waiting for me outside,” Emily said, remembering. “Ask him to drive you.”
The sisters wasted no time. They scurried off. When they had gone, Emily and Sam continued to wait. He paced while she prayed.
Give Dr. Mackay wisdom, Lord. Give him success.
Just when they both thought they could stand it no longer, a baby’s cry filled their ears. Sam’s face lit up and he quickly hugged Emily. Sometime later, Rebekah opened the door.
“Samuel Ward,” she said with a smile. “You have a beautiful baby girl.”
He gave a shout. “And Julia?”
“She must remain confined for several days, but she is well. You may see her now.”
The proud father rushed in. As relieved as Emily was, Rebekah’s words tempered her joy.
“Confined?” She whispered. “What happened? Is the baby strong enough?”
“The baby is quite strong. According to Dr. Mackay, she isn’t that early. Julia must have miscalculated the time.”
“But what about the blood?”
Rebekah shivered slightly. “I have never seen so much, even with the wounded. It was something to do with the afterbirth tearing inside, but Dr. Mackay managed it. He was able to stop the bleeding.”
Oh thank You, Lord.
“Come in and see her,” Rebekah insisted, her brightness returning. “She is precious.”
Emily stepped inside. Julia was pale, weak-eyed and wrapped in U.S. Army blankets, but she was smiling. Her beautiful newborn daughter was in her arms. The child was dark-haired and perfectly pink in the face.
“Oh!” Emily gasped. “She is something!”
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