“What was it like?” Alex asked, careful to keep any accusation out of her voice.
Anderson looked back at Alex. She went ahead, had me watch the hallway. I saw you approaching. When you turned the corner,” he took a deep breath. “I think she knew you were coming their way. Kargen was already in there.”
“We know that,” Krause said.
“Jonathan,” Eleana chastised him. “Let Marcus talk.”
“She told me to go. You were circling from the back. If you had gotten caught….”
“We might not have gotten anything,” Alex finished his thought. Anderson nodded.
It was another jagged piece in the puzzle that was Claire Brackett. Alex still could not figure out what Claire stood to gain in any of this—other than Eleana. That didn’t add up either. She looked back at the rolling footage on the screen.
“Why did she go with you?” Alex asked.
“I don’t know,” Anderson answered her honestly. “She would never let anything happen to Eleana knowingly. That much I know. She’d die first.” Eleana closed her eyes and sighed. “I’m sorry,” he apologized to her. “It’s the truth.”
“But?” Alex guessed he had more to say.
“I can’t be sure,” he said. “She’s been, well, different. Reckless.”
“How is that different?” Krause asked.
“Not reckless on the job,” Anderson said.
“What do you mean?” Eleana wanted to know.
“Reckless. I don’t think she sleeps,” he said. “She drinks until she can. I’ve worked with her for over a year on an off,” he told the group. “She lives large on and off the job. I’ve never seen her swim in the drink like she has the last few months.”
“Any idea what triggered it?” McCollum asked. All eyes turned to him.
“She came back from looking for you,” he said. “Had all these stories. Then, he called her in.”
“Who?” Alex asked Anderson.
“Her father.”
McCollum’s sigh did not go unnoticed by Alex. She looked back at him just as he was focusing his attention on the screen.
“Where is this?” McCollum asked.
“Where is what?” Alex asked him.
“This parking lot,” he pointed to the screen.
Alex moved closer. She studied it for a moment. “It’s the lot adjacent to security. Why?”
McCollum backed up the footage.
“What the hell was that?” Anderson asked.
“You mean who the hell was that?” McCollum corrected him.
“Looks like a shadow of something to me,” Eleana observed.
“It is,” Alex agreed. She replayed the brief second. “Of a person. We were tied up at that moment. Marcus,” Alex looked at Anderson and calmly continued. “I need you to think. Where did you exit the building?”
“Same lot,” Anderson said.
“Think. Did you see anything at all when you were heading out? This is at the tail end of what you recovered. It had to be seconds before you were down there.”
“Nothing, I’m sorry.”
McCollum spoke. “Maybe you just can’t remember,” he looked at Alex. “I might be able to help with that.”
Alex held McCollum’s gaze unflinchingly. “Not without me present,” she told him.
“What are you talking about?” Anderson asked. “I told you, I didn’t see anything.”
McCollum smiled at Alex and then looked back at Anderson. “And, I told you I might be able to help you remember what you don’t know you saw.”
“I didn’t see anything.”
“Let me be the judge of that,” McCollum said. “Alexis?”
Alex nodded her agreement. “My father’s old office,” she suggested. “Go with Mr. McCollum,” Alex told Anderson. “I’ll be right there.” Anderson nodded and followed the older man.
“Alex,” Krause caught her arm. “You can’t seriously be considering letting McCollum question him? I’ve seen his handy work. Anderson might be…”
“Relax, Pip,” Alex said. “I think I know what he has in mind. I’m sure if it would have worked on O’Brien, he would have used it.”
“You think he’s going to take him under?” Krause asked.
“That’s exactly what I think,” Alex said.
“What’s going on?” Eleana asked.
Krause watched as Alex entered her father’s old office and closed the door behind her. “If I am not mistaken, I think we are getting a preview of Lynx.”
“The project?” Eleana asked.
“Mmm. And, the man,” Krause said. “I just hope he finds something.” Eleana looked at Krause quizzically. “If he saw or heard anything, McCollum will find it.”
“Is that a good thing?” Eleana asked.
“I really don’t know.”
***
Alex was surprised to find Cassidy sitting at the kitchen table when she returned home. “Hey. Everything okay?” Alex asked cautiously. Cassidy looked up at Alex. She let her sight drift to the threesome trailing behind and settle on her father. Her gaze was hard, harder than Alex could ever recall. “Cass?”
Cassidy inhaled a deep breath and exhaled it slowly. She looked back at Alex, her expression unchanged. “No. Everything is definitely not all right, Alex.”
“What…”
Cassidy looked directly at her father. “What do you know about Claire?” she asked him.
Eleana immediately flinched and looked at the older man beside her.
“What are you talking about?” James McCollum asked his daughter.
“You tell me,” Cassidy challenged her father.
“I’m not sure I am following you, Cassie.”
Cassidy nodded. She’d replayed Claire’s story over and over in her head. It had taken her more than two hours to get the young woman to calm down and sleep. She pushed her chair back slightly and folded her arms across her chest. Were it not for the unusual circumstances, Alex would have started laughing. She’d watched Cassidy assume the same posture with Dylan on several occasions.
“What happened to Claire’s mother?” Cassidy asked.
Alex’s brow wrinkled in confusion. “Cass? What does that…” Cassidy held up her hand to stall Alex.
“Marjorie was struck by a drunk driver,” McCollum said. “At least, that is what I was given to believe. I was not here…”
“Yes, I know,” Cassidy said. “You were dead. Lots of death in our families.”
“Cassie,” McCollum began. “What is this about?”
Eleana looked at Cassidy to implore an answer. Cassidy smiled at the younger woman. “Car accidents seem to be a convenient thing for you all,” Cassidy said flatly.
“Cass?” Alex looked at her wife with growing concern.
“You had a car accident. Washed away by the river. Right?” Cassidy asked her father. “Christopher, he certainly was accident prone. Why do I think you might know something about that?” Cassidy asked.
Krause felt a wave of heat flood to his face. Alex noticed immediately. “Jonathan?” she looked at him. Krause sighed.
Cassidy shook her head in disgust. “I may not be one of the chosen few for this insanity you all have going. I am certainly not stupid. You would think you people could come up with something more original to cover your tracks,” she shot.
“Cassidy,” Alex finally decided to be direct. “What is this about?”
“Dad? Want to enlighten the room or should I?”
McCollum closed his eyes in reservation. “I wasn’t here, Cassie.”
“No, but you know the truth, don’t you?”
“She was a liability, a risk,” he said. “She departed from the course we had set. Threatened to go public with certain operations. He had no choice,” McCollum tried to explain.
Eleana went pale. “Who had no choice?” Eleana asked.
Cassidy kept her gaze locked on her father. All eyes turned to the older man. “Bill,” McCollum said.
“Are
you saying, Claire’s father killed her mother?” Eleana asked in disbelief. “How could…”
“I wasn’t here,” McCollum repeated his defense. “I don’t know the details, just that the accident was arranged…”
“Oh my, God,” Eleana leaned into Krause.
Cassidy’s caustic chuckle turned Alex’s stomach. “Well, it seems Claire and I are not so different after all,” Cassidy said. “I mourned my father for years, thinking he died in an accident. That’s what everyone told me. Funny, I always had this dream of him standing over my bed that night. Everyone told me it was a dream. It wasn’t a dream, though, was it?” Cassidy asked. McCollum sighed softly. Cassidy shook her head. “And, Claire? Everyone told Claire her nightmares were from trauma. They weren’t though. She didn’t imagine her father either. At least for me, my father was telling me he loved me. Claire? Her memory? Do you know what that is?” Cassidy asked her father. “No? You weren’t here. She watched him choke the life from the woman who gave her life.”
Alex covered her face with her hands. Cassidy finally stood. She walked directly to her father. “I don’t know when it is enough for you. I do know this. There isn’t one mission, not one thing more important on this earth than the children you give life to—not one. I clearly learned that from my mother,” she said. She turned to Alex and kissed her gently on the cheek. “I’ll see you upstairs.” Lastly, she turned to Eleana. “I’m sorry to tell you this way,” Cassidy said as she made her way from the room.
“Tell me that Claire is playing with Cassidy. Tell me that she is feeding her compassion. Tell me that.”
McCollum shook his head. “I didn’t know how it happened, Alex. I don’t think anyone knew.”
“Anyone?” Eleana asked. “Did he know? My father? Did he know that The Admiral killed her?” she asked pointedly. McCollum’s silence served as her answer. Eleana let out a disgusted breath. She turned to Krause.
“Go,” Krause told her. Eleana nodded her thanks and headed back toward the stairs. “Jesus Christ,” Krause groaned.
Alex pinched the bridge of her nose. “When will it be enough?” she asked, not sure who she expected to answer, or who she was asking. Alex turned without another word and followed the direction Cassidy had taken moments earlier. She passed Claire’s room and saw Eleana leaning over Claire. She wondered for a moment what they both had been like as children. Her pace slowed as she approached the room she shared with Cassidy. Cassidy was cradling Mackenzie, humming to her softly.
“Come here,” Cassidy told Alex.
Alex shut the bedroom door and made her way to sit beside Cassidy on the bed. “I’m sorry.”
Cassidy nodded. “I know you are. That doesn’t help Claire.”
“I’m more worried about you.”
Cassidy chuckled and turned to Alex. She smiled earnestly. “Me? No, love. I’m okay. I have my family.”
“That doesn’t take away…”
“No, it doesn’t take anything away,” Cassidy immediately agreed. “But, Alex, I had my mother to raise me. I have you. I have our children. I’ve never been left to feel unprotected. Vulnerable? Of course. But, afraid? Truly afraid? Alex, I’ve only felt that once. That was enough. Imagine feeling that your whole life? Imagine not even knowing why you fear the one person you are supposed to be able to trust more than everyone else?” Cassidy’s emotions began to surface.
Alex reached across and caressed Cassidy’s cheek. “Cass, not that I am not sympathetic, but why did Claire…”
Cassidy smiled sadly. “She had a nightmare. One like you used to. One like…like the one I…”
“I understand.”
“I went to wake her. When she did, she…Alex, I’ve seen that expression. I’ve felt it on my own face.”
“It doesn’t make the things she’s done,” Alex began.
“It doesn’t make anything all right, Alex. I know that. Don’t you think it explains some things? Don’t you wonder? Even just a tiny bit who she would have been?” Cassidy asked. She looked down at Mackenzie and shook her head. Cassidy kissed her daughter and crossed the room to place her back in her portable crib. She turned back to Alex slowly. “I’m not saying that I trust her, Alex. I feel for her.”
Alex smiled. Cassidy was angry, angrier than Alex could ever recall. She could feel Cassidy’s resentment lying underneath her calm exterior. Most people would have been overcome by the wave of pain and insecurity betrayal produced. As always, something more powerful seemed to override those emotions for Cassidy—compassion. Alex suspected that Cassidy had yet to allow herself the luxury of feeling the array of emotions her father’s return could have produced. Claire served as a distraction. Alex understood that. But, Claire was also a soul who needed nurturing. If anyone could succeed in that endeavor, it was the woman standing before her.
“Cass, you can’t save everyone.”
Cassidy chuckled. “Look who’s talking.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I do. I don’t want to save her, Alex. I just want to help her,” Cassidy said sincerely. Alex sighed heavily. Whatever had transpired between Cassidy and Claire Brackett had affected Cassidy deeply. Alex reached for her temples and Cassidy caught her hands. “Stop worrying about me,’ Cassidy said.
“Cassidy, I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
Cassidy’s melancholic smile tore at Alex’s heart. “It’s too late for that, Alex. We’ve all been hurt. You can’t save me or anyone else from getting hurt—not even our children,” Cassidy said. Alex recoiled slightly at the statement. Cassidy took Alex’s hand and kissed her palm. “I know you will try. I will try. You can’t protect us from the world, love. You just can’t.”
“I know,” Alex admitted.
“Alex, look at me,” Cassidy implored her wife. “Maybe Claire needs a purpose.”
“Claire’s purpose has always been Claire.”
“Maybe. Maybe that’s all she knows, Alex.”
“She had Eleana. She had a chance…”
Cassidy shook her head. “No, Alex. She never had a chance. Not after that day. Not with that secret to carry. A secret she couldn’t even remember if I’m right.”
“That might be true, Cass. Loss does things to people.”
“That’s not just loss, Alex. Even if it was, you’re right. Loss changes you.”
“You lost your father, and you never…”
“I told you, I had my mother. I always had my mother. Eventually, I found you. I’ve always had someone stronger than me to protect me,” Cassidy said.
Alex kissed Cassidy on the forehead. Cassidy leaned into Alex’s embrace. “You really do have that all backward, Cass,” she said. “Okay, I hear you. Just know that Claire has a…”
“I already know what she has been. I wonder what she can be,” Cassidy said.
Alex led Cassidy back to the bed. She shed her clothing and crawled in beside her wife. Cassidy’s head came to rest on Alex’s chest, her fingers dancing lightly over Alex’s skin.
“Are you going to tell me?” Cassidy asked.
“What?”
“Why he is really back? It can’t be…”
Alex held Cassidy tightly. “I don’t want you to worry about that.”
“We promised—no secrets,” Cassidy reminded Alex.
“I know. Not tonight,” Alex said. “I don’t want to think about the past or tomorrow. Just let me hold you tonight.”
Cassidy silently agreed. She closed her eyes and lost herself in Alex’s gentle caress. She couldn’t help but wonder if the past was destined to somehow repeat itself. As if Alex could read her mind, Alex put her fears to rest.
“We aren’t our fathers, Cass. I promise. We will never be them.”
***
Eleana entered the bedroom Claire was in and closed the door.
“Claire?” Eleana gently shook Claire. Claire opened her eyes and offered Eleana a sad smile. Eleana said nothing. She pulled the covers back and climbed in beside the woman who had b
een her best friend nearly since birth. She wrapped Claire in her arms and held her. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered. Eleana’s tenderness opened the floodgates again for Claire, and she began to cry. Eleana rocked her softly.
“You shouldn’t be here,” Claire whispered.
“I’m exactly where I should be.”
“Jonathan?”
“Not now, Claire. This is not about Jonathan and me. It’s not about you and me. It’s about you. Why didn’t you tell me?” Eleana wondered.
Claire let Eleana hold her. “I could never remember,” Claire confessed. “The dream,” she explained. “I would wake up to flashes, but I could never put them together.”
“And, tonight you remembered?” Eleana sought to understand. Claire just nodded. “Are you sure?” Eleana asked. Claire nodded again. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No,” Claire answered. She pulled away from Eleana. “You should go,” Claire said.
“You don’t want me to stay?” Eleana’s voice was laced with hurt.
Claire smiled. “I do want you to stay. I don’t think you should.”
“Because of Jonathan?”
Claire took Eleana’s hand. “Because I love you,” she said.
Eleana was confused. “I love you too, you know?”
“I know you do, but it’s not the same.”
“Claire, you’ve been my best friend forever. I want to be here.”
“I know,” Claire said. “But, I need you to go.”
Eleana nodded and pulled herself from the bed. “I don’t want you to be alone,” she said.
“El, please…Please, don’t make this any harder for me,” Claire begged. “You don’t know how much I want you to stay.”
“Then why are you sending me away?” Eleana asked.
Tears fell over Eleana’s cheek and Claire felt her heart sink. Claire smiled at Eleana.
“Because, it’s the right thing for you,” Claire said.
“What about you?”
“It’s the right thing for me too,” Claire told her. Eleana nodded sadly and started to leave. “I want you to be happy,” Claire whispered.
Eleana looked back at her friend. “That’s all I ever wanted for you too,” she said. Claire nodded. “Claire, if you need me…”
Conspiracy (Alex and Cassidy Book 4) Page 25