by Alison Aimes
Lana sniffed, as if Grif’s words displeased her, but Nayla found them comforting. While her ease with the Other males was increasing, she was still awkward with the females.
Not to mention that, despite her nerves about spears, new paths, and potential confrontations with the pack, the proof that Grif cared for her made her feel as shimmery as a lit danashe crystal.
Once they were away from the others, the silence stretched. Nayla wondered if she fully understood the Other meaning of talk.
“I, ah, I’m sorry. I’m not normally such a mess.” Lana laughed, but it sounded forced. “I mean, these rotations, I am, but I didn’t used to be before….” Her expression sharpened. “Well, anyway, I wanted to say that I’m sorry I made you feel uncomfortable the last time I spoke. That wasn’t the intent. I want you to feel you have a safe place to go whenever you need.”
She did, with Grif, but she was coming to suspect the wasn’t what the female meant. So, all she said was, “Thank you. You and the others have been very kind. I was not treated with such welcome by my pack. I am grateful.”
“Oh,” the female’s discomfort lessened, “you do not need to feel grateful. I know it took me a while to adjust. Frankly, I still am.”
Nayla nodded. Her efforts to observe were paying off. The female was far less tense than during their last exchange.
“I think that’s why I was so upset when I learned what Grif had done to you.” Lana paused, peeking down at Nayla. “I-I might have had a tiny crush on him.”
Since Nayla had no idea if the crush the female had put on Grif was good or bad she said nothing.
Lana rushed on. “He’s so handsome. Like one of those vid-star heroes who you just know is the good guy. He smiles at you and you just know he’s going to do whatever it takes to keep you safe.”
How strange. Nayla willed her expression not to change. She’d thought Grif was a terrifying beast when she’d first seen him, so hairy and muscular and tall, but then she’d been judging him by pack standards. Now she judged him by her body’s response and he appeared the sexiest of males to her.
“I know…I know. Idiocy.” Lana sighed. “I sound so silly. It’s just…I was in such a bad place when he and the others rescued us, and I’d gotten so used to men being only cruel and horrific.” The female’s voice softened. “He was so different, so strong and capable, teaching me how to defend myself, but also so sweet with Melody and Hope. I know you haven’t seen that part of him, but—”
“I have.”
“You have?” Lana sounded surprised.
“Yes. He has been gentle with me, but I like him better when he is fierce and monstrous and broken, like me.”
Lana reared back, her cheeks paling. “I…I don’t know what to say.”
Too much honesty. She’d forgotten that was only for Grif. “You don’t need to speak, then. I am comfortable with silence.” She gave the female a small smile in hopes of rectifying her mistake. “I think it is better anyway. I am not so strong with New English words and I do not think you have a good sense of Grif or me at all.”
The female’s eyes went wide and then her lips titled downward, tiny sharp creases appearing at the corners. “I’m only trying to help. What happened to you…it happened to me, too.”
Nayla stiffened. “With Grif? He did the same to you?”
“What? No.” Lana looked horrified, then sad. “Other men. Horrible men.” She shuddered.
Nayla’s chest went tight. It was clear the female had suffered. “I understand.” She patted Lana’s shoulder, mimicking the gesture the female had done to her the other night. “I had a horrible male hurt me, too. Many times. I will never forget. But that is not what happened with Grif.”
“I saw the shackles, the bench,” Lana persisted. “Even now, he bosses you around, telling you where you can go. I thought he was so good, but he’s brainwashed you and you don’t even realize it.”
A wave of protectiveness crashed over Nayla, but this time it was not for the female, but for Grif.
He had told her many times how much he liked that she got to see the real him, but she had not understood until now just how hemmed in he had been by the expectations of others.
She’d witnessed their adulation and respect and not realized those like Lana were only pleased with one side of him. They liked that he had found the location of the missing females, they liked that he had rescued them, but they preferred to pretend they did not know what it took for him to achieve such results, or who it turned him into.
They didn’t know him fully. Not like she did. They did not accept him fully. Not like she did.
He might have had his crew, but he’d still been alone.
He might not have been forced to wear the anazi, but he’d been unseen.
“It’s okay, Lana.” She patted with female’s shoulder again. “I understand now.”
Grif needed her, too. It was another revelation, and another first.
Her heart swelled, the whispering, negative voices inside her head that sounded a lot like Talg wholly silent for once. She could be as good for Grif as he was for her.
“I’m glad to hear it’s finally starting to sink in.” The other female looked surprised, then relieved. “Time away from him will be the ideal way to clear your head and realize positive feelings for our captors are wrong. Of course, it would be best if he removed himself from our lives altogether, but that will never happen.”
Grif go away? Because of her? The negative voices returned with a roar. “Y-you want him gone?”
“Of course.” Fury flashed in Lana’s gaze. “After what he did to you, he should be cast out.”
Ice slid down Nayla’s spine. She knew what it was to be Gazi. To be punished, ostracized and reviled.
She would never allow that to happen to Grif.
37
“This seems like a long way to go for a bathroom break.” Grif forced his voice to remain low though he wanted to roar, the pain shredding his chest making the monster inside him near feral.
Several lengths ahead, Nayla froze. She whirled around. The sleeping blanket she’d stolen tumbled to the ground. He saw it all with crystal clear clarity thanks to the glowing danashe crystals imbedded in the cave walls. It might be night on the surface, but the underground space was always awash in a golden glow.
It was far too bright for his current mood.
He’d thought things between them were going well. She’d told him she liked being a part of his team. She’d shown his team the underground river and sicced her vicious pet on the creatures trying to eat them. She’d smiled at him and shown him the glowing rocks. She’d melted against him and made those sweet sounds he doubted he’d ever forget.
Except here she was, sneaking away from the campsite through one of the caves in the underground wall when everyone was asleep.
So much for his excellent second-in-command instincts.
Had she been playing him all along? Was this some kind of trap just as Malin had said?
Only thing that didn’t make sense: she hadn’t taken Sharluff and she hadn’t hightailed it back into the water and just slipped away, leaving them stranded. Instead, she’d snuck through a crack near the cave walls and was picking her away across the rocks.
He couldn’t figure out why. Unless she’d come out here to meet someone.
“Grif.” Hearing her say his name in that sweet lilting accent of hers only hurt more. “You need to go back.”
“Oh, I will.” He pulled his rope from his hip. “But not without you.”
She shook her head. “I cannot.”
“You waiting for someone?” If it was that Ramm bastard he was going to rip him apart and wear his fangs as a fucking necklace.
“Waiting for someone?” The three faint lines at the bridge of her nose wrinkled in that way he found adorable, and he wanted to howl. “No.”
“Bullshit.”
Raina had snuck away, too. She’d crept outside while his father was off drinking a
nd Grif was sleeping—his breathing heavy and deep, his dreams filled with escape plans, so sure that with his father out he could relax his guard for a few hours and his sister would be safe. Instead, she’d strung their father’s favorite rope from the rooftop and hung herself.
Nayla might not have snuck away to take her own life, but the end result was the same: desertion.
Her tiny fangs poked at her lower lip. “You need to return to the others.”
“If you think I’m just walking away while you break your promise to me and run, you don’t know me as well as I thought.”
“I not leaving.” She seemed genuinely outraged by his words. “I give my word to help. I not just slip away. If you think that, you don’t know me well.”
His heart beat fast. “Then what the hells is going on here?”
“I-I travel separately.”
“Excuse me?”
She took a deep breath as if bracing herself. “You not the only one who can take care. I take of you, too.”
Another burst of rage. “I don’t need you to take care of me.”
Raina’s note had said the same thing. I do this for you, Grif. Because you won’t leave without me. Because I’m not like you. Because it’s too late for me. Bullshit. If she’d really fucking cared she would have stayed alive and had faith that he’d somehow find a way to keep them both safe.
“Too bad.” Nayla’s voice shook. “You say before that I free to make my own choices. Traveling separately is my choice.”
His confusion increased, though the red fog of fury clouding his brain lessened as the fact that he might have misread the situation finally penetrated. Mostly because she sounded so earnest, and outraged.
“Nayla, what’s going on?”
Her expression crumpled. “I not allow you to be Gazi like me.”
His stomach contracted. He sensed he was still going to be feeling like shit in a matter of heartbeats, but for a completely different reason.
He hooked his rope back on his hip. “Explain.”
“Th-they upset with you. Because of me.” The words rushed out, so fast and accented he knew she was beyond upset. “I hoped it would lessen, but it only get worse. Lana say you should be k-kicked out. I never allow that to happen to you.” She threw her shoulders back and stood taller. “So, I-I travel separately. Sleep separately. Th-that way I do what Lana want. Malin, too. Keep distant from you. R-remove taint. Then they not focus on what happen and you can stay.”
Ah, hells. No wonder she had the sleeping blanket. She was willingly isolating herself—the very thing she hated most—out of some mixed-up attempt to protect him.
Of course, he should have expected something like this. The social dynamics were all new to her. She had no idea who held the power and what was possible. It didn’t sound as if there was much free speech among pack. If Talg didn’t like something, it led to punishment, isolation, or banishment.
She couldn’t know his team didn’t work that way. Or that it would take a lot more than whining by those unhappy with his choices to get him gone. He, the commander, and Ryker were solid for life. Rescued civilians like Lana had a lot of latitude, but if they didn’t approve of the way the team ran things, they were welcome to leave and seek protection elsewhere. He, and those he’d claimed as his, weren’t going anywhere.
“Nayla, baby, come here, please.” He opened his arms.
All along he’d been telling himself his worry was all about protecting her. That was true. But it was only half the story. Somehow, someway, this female had gotten so deep under his skin there was no going back for him. She was fast becoming the tether to his sanity and his soul. He could not lose her. For his sake as much as hers.
She shook her head. “No. I return at light and stay with females.”
“Not happening.” He bounded over the largest rock between them.
Her eyes went wide. “N-no, I never drag you down with me.”
“I’m a fucking savage Other. I don’t get dragged down, baby. I do the dragging.” He kept coming. “If anyone doesn’t like us together, they can take it up with me personally.”
“But if they make you go?”
“They can’t. They won’t.” His hands closed around her shoulders and his lungs finally started working right. “My position is secure.”
He ran his palms up and down her arms, unnerved all over again at how fragile she felt beneath his grip. “I also want to make something very clear. I’m a big boy. I can take care of myself.”
The lines at the bridge of her nose deepened, but she didn’t speak.
“You don’t want to be physical with me anymore, that’s okay.” He forced the words out. “You don’t want to stay in my tent, that’s fine. But I need you to remain a part of the team and to tell me what you’re thinking, no matter what.”
She placed her hand on his chest, the sudden flare of lust and need in her gaze slicing through him like a laser burst. “I do want to be in your tent.”
Red hot need slammed through him, but he forced the words out anyway. “I don’t want you to think I won’t have your back either way. I will always protect you.”
“I know what I want.” That stubbornness of hers reared its head. “I was just…worried.” Her shoulders sagged. “It all harder than I thought. One moment happy, the next afraid. Everyone new and I never know if I doing right. I feel…lost.” Her gaze lifted to his. “Except with you.”
He hauled her close and pressed his forehead to hers. “I can’t lose you.”
She froze.
“It’s not just you who feels that way, wild thing.” He sucked down a deep breath. “None of this is easy, but it’s worth it.”
“Sometimes hard to me to believe. I…I still hear Talg in head.”
“He’s not here now. It’s just you and me.”
“Yes.” Determination flared in her gaze. Gaze locked with his, she unhooked the rope coiled at his hip and pressed it to his chest. “Shut him out. Make me feel safe, free.”
Blood pounding in his veins, he gripped her hand in his. “Always.”
Taking the rope from her grasp, he unfurled it between them.
“You want a reminder that I’m going to take better care of this body than anyone ever could?”
“Yes.”
He skimmed the braided tip over the flush spreading across the hollows over her collarbone, desire and tenderness a raging storm in his chest. “Guard it like the savage, monstrous Other I am?”
Her breathing hitched.
He waited.
“Yes.” The single word was a low, sweet moan. “Remind me.”
Her arms were behind her back and laced tight in the next instant. He tightened the final knot with a quick snap. She let out a soft sigh. Grif’s balls drew tight. She liked to submit. He liked her surrender.
He stepped back to survey his work. “You’re so damn beautiful.”
She looked up at him with that same mix of doubt and awe that threatened to cut him off at the knees. That made him desperate to do whatever the fuck it took to have her looking at him like that for as long as he could.
“For those few moments when I thought you were leaving me, the monster in me roared so loud, the pain was almost too much to bear.” He sucked down another harsh breath. “I don’t do well with helpless.”
“You the strongest, fiercest male I know—and I am right here.” Rising to her tiptoes, she pressed her lips to his collarbone, his chin, the corner of his mouth, whispering the words against his skin, a healing balm of their own. “To do with as you wish.”
His control broke. His mouth slanted across hers. His palms slid to her ass. He lifted her to him, needing her even closer. “Promise me you’re staying.”
“I promise.” She wrapped her legs around him, accepting him, her need as great as his own. Kissing him back as wildly, her teeth raking down his throat as she marked his skin like she had his soul.
Nothing soothed the beast inside more.
“Come in
side me, Grif.”
Except maybe that.
His cock thickened, his blood pounding hot as she writhed against him.
“Soon, baby.” As he spoke, he put her down and grabbed the blanket from where she’d dropped it. After a quick shake, he tossed it over the nearest rock. Her trust, as she simply watched and waited, floored him all over again. “We need to go over a little something first.”
He spun her around, bending her face down over the rock, her gorgeous ass tilted high in the air.
She sucked down a gasp.
He slid his thigh between her legs and, slowly, gently, forced hers to spread wide. The deliberate precision and control drew out the anticipation, until her sweet pussy, already so wet and needy, was exposed to his gaze.
“So pretty.” He leaned over, blanketing her body with his, and whispered in her ear. That’s what I see when I look at you. Pretty inside and out.” He nuzzled her ear before drawing back. “But stubborn, too.” He tapped her ass with the flat of his hand.
She moaned.
He dropped to his knees. Ran the tip of his tongue along her slit. “Next time you have trouble with my teammates, you come to me.”
She gasped, stiffening for an instant before her body melted, her thighs spreading wider.
“I’m in charge of this mission. That means I get final say. Not just over you, baby, but over them all. They leave before you do. You hear me?”
“Y-yes.”
He pressed the flat of his tongue to her tiny nub. Worked it good. She mewled, pushing her pussy back against him and grinding like the wild thing she was.
He took her to the edge and then drew back. “Even more important. You don’t risk yourself for me.”
She shook her head. “N-no. I do. I protect you as fiercely as you do me. T-to death if need be. That is what a team is.”
He circled her clit with the flat of his thumb. “That’s my job. Not yours. You hear me?”
She bucked. Moaned.
“Do. You. Hear. Me?” He punctuated each word with a slight palm tap to her swollen nub.