by James, Avery
Chapter 22
Half an hour into his prep work at Haven Communications, Harry watched Maggie step out of her boss’s office and into the hallway outside the conference room. Somehow she looked just as good in a skirt and blazer as she did in a bikini. He wanted to get up and head to her. He wanted to say something, anything, to make her smile. He hated the way he’d left things with her, and he’d been beating himself up over it ever since. He hated to see her unhappy, and from what he could tell, she was as miserable as he was.
“Hey, lover boy, eyes over here,” Abby said.
“Excuse me?” Harry replied.
“I see you watching her,” Abby said. She made a chopping motion against the side of her neck. “Off limits. After what you did to her in Cuba… If you weren’t the client, I’d kick you out on the street myself.”
“Look, I don’t know what you heard, but I’m trying to do the right thing here,” Harry said.
“The right thing would have been being upfront with Maggie from the start.”
“I care about her,” Harry said, “more than you know.”
“Then play nice and do not hurt my friend under any circumstances or I will make you pay. What the hell were you thinking getting involved with her?”
“Do you talk to all your clients that way?” Harry asked.
“Only the ones who break my friends’ hearts,” Abby replied.
“How did you even know I was looking at her?” he asked.
“I saw that look, and I know that look, and if you try anything with her, I swear I will make sure your prenup has a chastity clause.”
Harry couldn’t help but crack a smile. He liked Abby already. In truth, it made him glad to know that Maggie had friends who had her back. “For your information, I wasn’t thinking. I fell for her before I knew who she was, and then I wanted that feeling to last, even if it was just for a little bit. We’re both paying for that now. Can we change the subject? What were we talking about again?”
“Your interview. You and Katrina Nussbaum will be meeting with a reporter tomorrow to make your big announcement,” Abby said. Her tone seemed softer, like she had realized that he wasn’t just a heartless jerk. A jerk with a heart. That seemed about right.
“Will Maggie be there?” Harry asked. He had to find some way to be alone with her, some way to tell her that he’d made an enormous mistake in the way he’d handled things but also that he was afraid of bringing her into his world. It was one thing for her to work in that world, but living in it was something else entirely. She didn’t have to worry about the motives of her friends and family. Harry didn’t have that luxury, and he hated it. He didn’t want her to have to face the same thing.
“I don’t know, we’ll see,” Abby said. “Let’s just get through these interview questions first. We’ve prepared some responses for you if you don’t feel comfortable coming up with your own answers. They’re in the folder in front of you.”
“I can give it a shot,” Harry said. He picked up the folder and started reading from one of the pages. “I’m just so in love with Katrina. She’s my entire world. I don’t know where I’d be without her,” he droned. “Do we really have to do this?” he asked.
“You’re about to get engaged to one of the most famous women in America, and you sound like you’re reading from the phone book. Try it again, with a little more emotion this time.”
“Fine, let’s see,” he said. He read through the questions. Most of them were boilerplate background questions. “Where did you meet?” he said. “The response just says we met at work.”
“Didn’t you?” Abby said. As Harry thought it through, Maggie stepped into the room. Harry’s mind went blank, and he forgot about the questions and the arranged marriage and everything but Maggie. He wanted to jump up from his seat and wrap his arms around her. He wanted to drop to his knees and beg forgiveness, but he did neither.
“Hey,” he said. It was all he could manage. He didn’t know what to say, and really there weren’t words enough to express how torn up he felt about how he left things.
Maggie offered an overly cheerful good morning, but Harry could tell she was seething. Or maybe he wanted her to be mad because it was better than the possibility that she didn’t care.
Harry tried to refocus. He tried to remember the question. Where did we meet? “That’s not the point. The point is people need a story they can believe. No one will believe that Katrina and I fell in love after this many years because we were never in love from the start. You need a better story.”
“Well, then, tell us a story,” Abby said. “I’m sure Maggie would love to hear it, too. How did you fall in love?”
“Getting right to the heart of it,” he said. How did I fall in love? Harry thought. He decided to tell the truth. He thought back to the way he’d felt after first seeing Maggie. It was a feeling unlike any other. “I’d like to say it was love at first sight, but it was more like awe. I saw her across a crowded lobby, and as soon as she looked back at me, it was like the rest of the world had dropped away. She was beautiful, and I spent the rest of the afternoon convinced that I had dreamed her up.”
“That’s it?” Abby asked.
“No, I saw her by chance that afternoon, and she surprised me by being even smarter and funnier than she was beautiful. From that moment forward, I was done for. I knew that if we couldn’t be together, I’d be miserable.”
He tried to read the emotion on Maggie’s face, but she stayed stoic. He had a good idea that this was as close as he’d get to a chance to explain himself, and he intended to use it for all it was worth.
“That will work,” Abby said, “but what about the questions that require some invented backstory, like how the two of you reconnected?”
“I made a dumb mistake, and she eventually took me back. That’s believable, right?”
“That makes it sound like you cheated. In light of the current scandal raging around us, maybe you can say that the two of you were friends for years before reconnecting.”
“Well, you can’t just be friends, right? If you’re in love with someone, you’re either all there or you aren’t. If you’re around them, and you can’t be with them, it hurts.”
“Maybe not so dramatic,” Abby said. “Let’s keep going. What made you pop the question?”
“You mean why am I getting married?”
“Is there a difference?” Abby asked.
“Yeah. You, Maggie and Amy work for my father, but I want you to understand something about me and why I’m doing this.”
“The multibillion-dollar inheritance and famous socialite fiancée don’t have anything to do with it?” Abby asked.
“Have you ever read Sun Tzu?” Harry asked.
“The Art of War?” Abby asked. “No, why?”
“Neither have I, but do you know who has? Every single MBA my father hires to work at his company. They all think of everything as a battle. Everyone’s their enemy. Profit is their only goal. When you think of everything as a battle, you tend to forget things like nuance and empathy. You treat your employees like cannon fodder. You squeeze every last ounce of profit out of everyone and everything regardless of whether it’s the right thing to do or not. You circumvent every ethical and moral guideline that stands in your way. You want to know why I’m getting married? Because it’s the only way I can do anything worth a damn. I didn’t want to believe that, but now I understand. Do I want to be here, getting married to someone I haven’t seen in almost a decade? No. But I’m here because I have a job to do, and I’m done being selfish. I’m done running from responsibility. I know what I want, and I’m going to do everything in my power to get it.”
He kept his eyes on Maggie.
“As hard as it might be for you to accept, there are some things you can’t have,” she said.
“That won’t stop me from trying,” he replied.
“That’s one battle you won’t win,” she said.
“Like I said, reality is a li
ttle more complicated than that,” he said.
Maggie turned to Abby. “Do you think Gavin and I could have a minute alone?”
“That might be a good idea,” Abby said. “You need to work out whatever this thing is the two of you have before there are other people in the room. Because right now, you’re beyond obvious.”
“One minute,” Maggie said.
“I’ll give you five,” Abby said. She picked up her folder and stepped out of the conference room.
“Do you think this is funny?” Maggie asked once they were alone. “Do you think this is some kind of game? You spent the entire time we were together trying to get me to run off with you, and the moment I started to actually consider it, you decided you couldn’t bear to be with me for another moment. Now we’re here, and you’re right back at it. Thank God Abby is my friend and willing to cover for me. Do you realize you could cost me my job? What we did, what we had—it crossed all kinds of professional and ethical boundaries.”
He could see the anger and hurt in her eyes. She was mad at him. Mad was good. Mad meant she still cared. Mad meant there was still a chance. Between mad and indifferent, he’d take mad every time, because it meant she hadn’t closed herself off to him. She wanted answers, he knew that, and he wanted to tell her everything. He just didn’t know where to begin. He didn’t know how to explain how much she meant to him or how badly he wanted to make things right.
“I’m trying to explain myself to you,” he said. “And I don’t know if you’ll give me another chance.”
“You have until Abby gets back,” Maggie said.
“I was trying to protect you,” Harry said. “I realized that I was being selfish and trying to have you all to myself. You have this wonderful life you’ve built for yourself with friends and family and coworkers who stick up for you and love you, and I didn’t want to mess that up.”
“You didn’t want to mess that up? Are you serious? You’re saying you shipped me off because you cared too much about me?” Maggie’s voice grew louder as she went on. “You get how terrible that is, right? You wanted me to live my life, so you denied me the chance to choose for myself? You talk about being forced into something you didn’t want? Well, what do you think you did to me?”
“I’m sorry, Maggie,” Harry said. “I really am.”
“I don’t need an apology, I just need you to stop doing whatever you’re doing. You were right to break things off. We both understood that what we had couldn’t last. But now you’re here, all but telling my coworkers that you have feelings for me, and I’m supposed to thank you for that?”
“Maggie, I’m—” he started, but she cut him off.
“If you care about me, you’ll stop right now. You’ll let this go. It was hard enough the way you left things, but stringing this along, dredging my feelings back up—what’s the point? We can’t be together. You have to get married, and I have to do my job, and even if we didn’t, I can’t trust you. You say one thing and then you do another. You push me out of your life, and then you require me to work for you. Why would you do that?”
“Because I trust you. I know you don’t like me right now, but you’re the only person here who I know. You’re the only one I know will do the right thing. I need you,” he said. There was so much more he wanted to say. I’m in love with you, Maggie. I will do whatever it takes to prove that to you. I would follow you to the ends of the earth or to the center of the hell that is the boardroom of my father’s company. Whatever it takes to be with you, I’ll do it. Why am I here? Because I’d rather be with you than without you, even if I can’t be yours. “Yell at me. Call me names, curse me. Do what you have to do, but don’t pretend you don’t care.”
“I care deeply,” she said, “but that doesn’t change a thing. You hurt me, Harry. You used me and you hurt me, and you can’t make that better by saying you meant well. Please don’t drag this out any longer. You’re marrying Katrina. You’re moving on. You have to let me move on, too.”
Harry didn’t want to marry Katrina, and he didn’t want to move on. He didn’t know how to convince Maggie of that either, but he needed to find a way. “Give me a chance,” he said. He wanted to wrap himself around her. He wanted to hold her and tell her that he’d been an idiot to think he could live without her, but he knew he’d have to live with that reality. She was right. He had to let her go.
“You had your chance,” she replied. “It’s over.”
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the door swing open. “Abby, we need another minute,” he said, but as soon as he looked to the door, he realized someone else was walking in.
“Gav!” Katrina shouted, rushing around the conference table to give him a hug. She planted a kiss on his cheek and all but hung off of him.
“Katrina,” he said. “Meet Maggie. Maggie, Katrina.” No matter how complicated things had been with Maggie, things had just gotten ten times more complex.
Maggie stood up, forced a smile and held her hand out to Katrina. “Pleased to meet you. I’ve heard such wonderful things. Gav here can’t stop talking about you. Why don’t the two of you take a minute to catch up while I get my associate?” Maggie headed out the door.
Harry caught her quick glare as she turned away. He wanted to chase after her but knew that he couldn’t. As Katrina played the part of the doting fiancée, Harry tried to figure out how everything had gone so spectacularly wrong. If anything, Maggie seemed angrier with him than she had been before. He wasn’t sure what had just happened, but he did know one thing. If he ever wanted a real shot at love, he was in the wrong woman’s arms.
Chapter 23
Every fixer knows that the press is either your best friend or your worst enemy. It pays to have friends in the press. Feed them a few stories, give them enough access, and they don’t even have to know they’re doing you a favor. It’s a symbiotic relationship, one that benefits everyone involved. So what if the public doesn’t get to know the full truth? The client wins, the reporter wins, and the fixer earns her keep.
Sometimes it can be hard to find a reporter willing to give up control in exchange for access. But with an exclusive on Katrina Nussbaum, Maggie was in a position to dictate terms. Haven Communications had been able to approve of every question in advance and had gotten the right to edit and redact responses as they saw necessary. They had complete control. They set the schedule. They chose the location. Everything was going exactly to plan. The Presidential Suite in Stanton’s hotel was perfectly staged. From the fresh flowers to the perfectly Photoshopped pictures of Harry and Katrina, along with a few real ones from the past, every detail was just right. Yet, as Maggie watched Harry answer the reporter’s questions, she felt nervous and unsure. Everything felt wrong.
Maybe part of her nerves had to do with the fact that the interview was taking place in the very hotel that had been the epicenter of the entire scandal raging through D.C., but Maggie knew that the only way forward was to push the old story out of the headlines in favor of a new one. All they had to do was minimize the hotel’s role in the whole scandal, and place it at the center of the new story. Katrina could have married a doormat and it still would have been the wedding of the decade.
Katrina was still something of a mystery to Maggie. Every bubbly smile or word out of her mouth made it seem like she was truly, madly in love with Harry. Maggie knew it was an act, but it was a good one. Even she was having trouble believing it wasn’t real. To his credit, Harry was smiling and holding Katrina’s hand, looking into her eyes as he answered questions, but he didn’t seem happy. Maybe she was projecting onto him, but she felt like he was miserable underneath the smiles. She’d seen the way Harry could fill a room with his presence, and she knew something was off. From the looks of it, though, no one else seemed to notice. Maybe she was just overthinking things. Maybe she just wanted him to be as conflicted as she was.
Maggie was torn. The fixer in her was glad that he was going through the motions, but another part of her wondered wh
y he didn’t say to hell with everything and confess his feelings for her. If he meant a word of what he’d said in the conference room about falling for her, then he should have been doing everything within his power to get out of this sham engagement. Maggie wondered if Harry had actually listened to her when she’d said she needed things to be over, or maybe he’d realized that life with Katrina wouldn’t be so bad after all. Maybe that was why he was holding Katrina’s hand and laughing at her jokes. Maybe he wanted to be with her.
Or maybe he didn’t. She tried to remind herself that Harry choosing Katrina would have solved a whole bunch of problems, but that didn’t stop it from hurting. Whether he meant it or not, she hated seeing him with someone else like that. The guy who had just swept her off her feet, the guy who had wanted to run away together, was hand in hand with someone else, talking about how much he couldn’t wait to get married. He’s just doing what you told him to do, she reminded herself.
Harry looked over to her and quickly looked away. His gaze seemed cold, impersonal. Maggie felt like he was looking through her. As she listened to Harry and Katrina field question after question, she wished she could rip up the questions and ask new ones. She wondered why she hadn’t done so during the practice session the day before. She’d just been so mad at Harry for showing up like everything was fine that she hadn’t been able to think straight. She could never think straight around him. She was always flustered, or annoyed or swept off her feet. She was never in control.
Harry’s laugh broke her train of thought. “I guess that’s what love is,” he said. “It takes a hold of you and it doesn’t let go. It doesn’t care about your plans or your pride. Once it finds you, it takes control and helps you do things you never thought possible.”
Is he talking about me? Maggie wondered. Is he talking about Katrina? His deep and abiding love for himself? Maybe she should have taken him up on his offer and heard what he had to say. At least that would have been better than agonizing over whether or not he had feelings for her, too.