“Um, you’re a champ, too. I can’t believe you decorated all those cookies. I have no idea how you accomplished such a Herculean task.”
“Neither do I. My hands might be permanently disfigured, and I’ll never be able to fly a plane again.” He made his fingers into claws, and she gave a mock scowl at his teasing. It slid away quickly, into sincere gratitude.
“Seriously, Jamie. Thanks. I’m realizing now, we wouldn’t have been able to finish them all without you. I would have been decorating cookies as we walked out the door to the boat parade.”
“Glad to do my part for the Haven Point Helping Hands.” He didn’t add that his efforts had been for her and for the boys, not for Eliza, McKenzie or any of the other women in her group.
“I heard the boys begging you to go with us tonight. You don’t have to give in to them, you know. I’m sure you’re tired after traveling all week.”
If he were smart, he would take the out she was offering him, but he couldn’t bring himself to say the words.
“I’m looking forward to it,” he said truthfully. “Christmas seems more meaningful when you can see it through the eyes of children. I don’t think I ever realized that, until Davy and Clint these last few weeks.”
She smiled warmly at him, looking so rosy and delicious, it was all he could do not to tug her into his lap.
“I do need to go get cleaned up before we leave. Do I have time for that?”
“Of course. Come back downstairs when you’re ready. You can take some cookies up with you, if you want. We have more than enough.”
“I’m not sure I will ever be able to eat another sugar cookie in my life,” he said. Or at least not for a few more hours.
* * *
“THAT WAS SUPER FUN,” Clint declared, as Jamie pulled out of the great parking space he found near the Haven Point city offices and into the steady traffic leaving the lakefront park that provided the best viewing for the annual boat parade.
“The best!” Davy said. “I loved all the boats and I especially loved seeing Santa Claus at the end.”
“I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Julia smiled at both boys, who were buckled into the backseat of Jamie’s SUV. The night had been truly magical, filled with good friends, delicious food and the sense of belonging to something bigger than herself.
She had always loved the Lights on the Lake festival but this year had been exceptional.
She couldn’t help remembering what Jamie had said earlier, about Christmas being more meaningful when glimpsed through the eyes of a child. He was absolutely right. The annual tradition had been sheer delight.
Everything had seemed perfect—the decorations, the musical entertainment, the food. Was it only because she was enjoying it all with Davy and Clint? Or did Jamie’s presence have something to do with the magic of the evening?
“I’m really glad you came with us, Jamie,” Clint said, as if echoing her thoughts.
The sincerity in his voice made her a little teary eyed. Both boys adored Jamie. How could they not? He was funny and warm and wonderful with them, like a favorite uncle should be.
He made everything more fun—and not just for her and the boys. Did he know that was his own particular gift, adding color and joy to the world?
Davy yawned, eyes already drooping. Though the drive from downtown to her house only took a few moments, he was asleep before Jamie pulled into the driveway—and his brother wasn’t far behind.
She couldn’t blame them. They had worked hard to help her with the cookies, all while trying to contain their excitement at the parade and the festival—not to mention their natural anticipation of Christmas, now just days away.
“Davy. Wake up,” she said softly. The boy groaned but didn’t open his eyes.
“I can carry him in,” Jamie said.
She decided not to argue, especially since she knew firsthand how heavy a sleepy six-year-old could be. After unbuckling Davy from his booster seat, Julia stood aside as Jamie scooped him into his arms.
“I can come back for Clint, if you’ll give me a minute,” he said.
“I can walk,” the older boy mumbled. He climbed out, wobbling a bit in his sleepy stupor until Julia put an arm over his shoulder.
“I’ll help you,” she said. As long as she led the way, Clint was able to put one foot in front of the other as they made their way up the stairs and down the hall to his bedroom, where they found Jamie had settled a still-sleeping Davy onto his bed and was pulling off his parka and shoes.
“Pajamas?” he asked softly.
She found them in the drawer, and, working together, they quickly had both boys dressed in their pajamas. Julia couldn’t help think about how her life might have been different, if this had been her husband, her children, coming home after a holiday outing.
After the children were in bed, perhaps she and her husband would retire to their own bedroom to stretch the wonderful evening out as long as possible.
The thought made her blush fiercely, and she hoped Jamie didn’t notice.
“I don’t need to shower?” Clint asked, clearly confused, as she helped him into his pajama bottoms.
“Not tonight. You can both shower in the morning before church. Just brush your teeth. You need to wash away all that cotton candy.”
The boy went into the bathroom and mechanically went through the motions. Though it wasn’t the most conscientious job she’d ever seen, she decided to let it go tonight.
He slipped back into bed, and she kissed his forehead. “Good night, my dear,” she murmured.
“Night,” Clint said. To her shock, he suddenly threw his arms around her neck.
“Thanks for taking us, Julia,” he said sleepily. “You’re the best.”
She was already feeling strangely emotional. His words sent her over the edge and forced her to fight back a sniffle.
Embarrassed, she tried not to show how his words touched her as she and Jamie slipped out of the room and closed the door behind them. She knew she hadn’t succeeded when Jamie squeezed her arm.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
The concern in his voice sent the emotions bubbling over, and she blinked back a tear—or two, or maybe ten.
“That boy. How sweet was that?”
“Sweet as your sugar cookies,” he said.
“Davy has seemed happy here, almost from the beginning. Maybe because he’s younger, I don’t know, but I do know the transition to living with me hasn’t been as easy for Clint. I think he misses his mother more.”
“Because he’s the older of the two, he probably has a little more understanding of the situation. He understands she’s ill and maybe won’t ever be well enough to care for them.”
The situation made her ache, for the boys, for their mother and for herself, too, if she were honest. They would leave her at some point. It was as inevitable as the dawning of a new year.
She wasn’t sure how she would go on without them.
“You’re doing a good thing for them, Julia.”
“Am I? This is just a temporary placement. Social services could decide to yank them away at any minute. I want to think Wynona Emmett would fight to keep them here with me, but she doesn’t have power to make the ultimate decision. I’m constantly worried that just when they have begun to feel comfortable here, they’ll be shuttled somewhere else.”
He gazed at her for a long moment, uttered what sounded like a curse word under his breath, then pulled her into his arms.
He’d taken off his outerwear while helping the boys and wore only jeans and a soft cable-knit sweater. She leaned her cheek against it, wishing she could stay there forever wrapped in the circle of his arms, blocking out the rest of the world and the reality that awaited.
“Whatever time you have with them, you’re making a d
ifference. Remember that. Your impact in their lives won’t be in vain, whatever happens. They will never forget how you rescued them.”
A tear or two spilled over, but she hid her face against his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist, grateful for his strength and his wisdom.
They stood that way for a long time while the cats snored on the sofa and the lights of the Christmas tree gleamed against the cold night.
She was in love with him.
As he held her, as she listened to his steady, dependable heartbeat beneath her cheek, the truth of it seemed to seep into her bones, her skin.
She loved him. She loved his strength, she loved his kindness, she loved the man he had become in spite of the tough times he had endured.
Oh. She had to be the world’s biggest fool.
The man had keep away written in huge letters around his heart. He had spent his entire adult life trying to avoid commitment and the very sort of love she wanted to offer. She had no idea how to break through those barriers he had built, or if she should even try.
How had she let it happen? She knew how dangerous he was. Long before she ever agreed to rent her upstairs to him, she had been aware of his reputation and the danger he might pose to her heart. Somehow she had let him in anyway.
He seemed content now to continue holding her, and she couldn’t bring herself to pull away. Along with the shock of realizing her feelings for him, she was also aware of something else.
She wanted him. Rather desperately. The strength of his arms reminded her of everything she had lost and everything she had given up. Everywhere their bodies touched, little starbursts of heat seemed to form, then expand.
If he kissed her again, she would be lost.
That would be a disaster. She’d already made enough of a fool of herself.
With supreme effort, she forced herself to back away and pasted on a polite smile. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to blubber all over you. You’re a very kind man, Jamie Caine.”
The look he gave her smoldered with heat. “You think so?”
“Yes. But I’m sure the boys and I have taken enough of your day, between the cookies and the boat festival. Now you’ve helped with bedtime and let me sniffle all over your chest. Yes, you’re a kind man and you’ve done more than enough. You’re probably sorry you ever asked about renting my upstairs apartment.”
He opened his mouth, then closed it again. She had the oddest thought that perhaps he might need her and the boys as much as they needed him. She dismissed the idea almost as soon as it came to her. Jamie needed something in his life, but it certainly wasn’t a harried librarian and her two troubled foster children.
“I’m not sorry,” he said. “I’ve enjoyed every moment of it. After everything Clint and Davy have been through, they deserve to have a wonderful Christmas.”
“I hope I can give them that,” she said. She was certain as the holidays approached, the boys would be missing their mother terribly. She had no idea how to compensate for what they had lost.
“You already have,” he said firmly. “They know they have a safe, warm place with someone who cares about them. Right now you, Julia Winston, are exactly what they need.”
She wanted to cry all over again as warmth bloomed in her chest. Oh, she loved him. Her heart was already breaking, anticipating the inevitable pain around the corner.
“Thank you. That was the perfect thing to say.”
“I meant every word.”
“I know.” She forced herself to smile. “As I said, you’re a very kind man. A little too kind. You’re not very good at saying no, but I promise, we will try not to bug you about anything for the next few days. I promise, I’ll make sure the boys leave you in peace for at least a few days.”
Oddly, as he let himself out and headed up the stairs, she thought he didn’t seem as relieved about that promise as she might have expected.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
A FEW WEEKS EARLIER he never would have believed it possible, but Jamie was beginning to dislike the overpowering stillness of his apartment.
Either his downstairs neighbors were avoiding him or their schedules were suddenly in direct opposition. The day after the festival, Julia and the boys seemed unusually busy, coming and going all day. He had his own errands to run that day, and it seemed like every time he pulled up, she was driving away with the boys in the backseat. And every time he seemed to be leaving again, he passed her on her way back home.
Monday morning, he had to leave again for the East Coast so the Caine Tech brass could have one last acquisition meeting before the holidays.
By the time he returned late Thursday afternoon, he found himself eager to see Julia and the boys again. When he spotted her sporty little SUV pulling into the driveway just ahead of him, he figured the fates had finally conspired to do him a favor and give him his wish.
She didn’t pull into the detached garage, as she usually did, but parked just off the side door that led to her kitchen. When she hurried to the backseat, he thought she might be helping the boys out, but instead she struggled to remove several large, bulky shopping bags. He hurried forward.
“You’ve been busy,” he said.
“Hi,” she said, rather breathlessly. “This is the result of several weeks of shopping. I didn’t do all this in an afternoon, I can assure you.”
“Good to know.”
“Andie Bailey is having a Christmas party for a bunch of the children, complete with pizza and games. I think she’s doing it to give other parents a chance to squeeze in some last-minute shopping.”
That was the sort of thing people in Haven Point did for each other, throw impromptu parties to help other harried parents. “Good idea.”
“I know, isn’t it? I thought this would be the perfect chance for me to bring Clint’s and Davy’s Christmas presents home from my secret hiding place at the library, so I could wrap them at a time they’re guaranteed not to walk in.”
“Good thinking.”
“I’m running out of time, since tomorrow is the last day of school for them and I have to run to Boise for a library association meeting.”
“No reason you can’t get this out of the way tonight, then.”
He took two of the large bags from her and picked up two more from her backseat before carrying them inside the house and into her living room.
Her cats immediately scampered to him as if they hadn’t seen him in weeks.
“Hey, girls,” he said to them, and was greeted by a chorus of meows.
His arms were too full to pet them, but they didn’t seem to care. They followed him inside anyway.
“Where do you want these things?”
With one of her bags, she gestured to a room he hadn’t been in.
“Just put everything on my bed. I already set a folding table up in there, thinking I could lock the door if the boys come home early. Andie promised she would call and warn me when she was on their way with them, but I don’t want to take any chances. You never know what might happen.”
“Look at you, figuring out this whole sneaky Christmas thing.”
She shrugged. “Andie is really saving the day for me, and I don’t think I’m the only one in this boat. I wasn’t sure when I would have the chance to wrap everything. I’ve been afraid to do it at night, since Clinton is a restless sleeper. He has bad dreams.”
Poor kid. Jamie’s heart ached for both boys. “How’s their mother?”
“Okay. From what I understand, she finally remembers the boys, but doesn’t seem to understand they’re her sons. Her doctor suggests we take the boys up to Portland. He’s hoping that will jog her memories. I don’t know if they’re up for that. I told him we would have to see.”
He would go with her, he decided. Though he had been trying to tell himself he needed
distance, he couldn’t let her undertake such a stressful thing on her own. “Say the word. I can make it happen.”
“Thank you.” Her features softened for a moment, then turned brisk again. “What am I doing, standing here wasting time talking, when I have presents to wrap?”
She hurried through the doorway, and he followed her into a room that completely took him by surprise.
He had seen her bedroom before, when he helped her in during her illness, but it struck him now how sensual it was, decorated in rich, vibrant colors, with Persian rugs, tasseled pillows, a big bed covered in a brocade canopy and shelves and shelves of books everywhere he looked.
For the first time, he realized her bedroom was directly below his own. The thought of her sleeping in that big bed, all tousled and warm only a few feet beneath him, sent heat curling through him.
He eyed the presents piled on the bed. “How long is the party supposed to last?”
“Andie assured me they would be going until about seven. That gives me an hour and a half.”
“You’ll never make it. There’s no way you can wrap all these presents by yourself in that amount of time. I’d better give you a hand.”
She opened her mouth as if to argue, then quickly closed it again. “Do you think I went overboard on the gifts? I’ve never been Santa Claus before. I think I went a bit crazy in the toy store.”
“They will love everything,” he assured her. “How could they not? They’re kids who will have new toys at Christmas.”
“I hope you’re right.” She shrugged out of her coat, and he saw she was wearing a blue sweater with tiny silver bells embroidered on it. She looked festive and cheerful and completely adorable.
They were in a bedroom, alone in her lovely house. Something told Jamie this was a potentially dangerous situation, that he would have a tough time keeping his hands off her.
He could handle it, he told himself. He shifted. “Where do you want me to start? I should warn you I’m not the best at wrapping gifts.”
Sugar Pine Trail--A Small-Town Holiday Romance Page 23