by J. C. Reed
He’s a man. Sooner or later, he’ll want the one thing you can’t give him.
I would never trust a man again.
The voice of reason hit me a moment before I realized I wanted to taste him, but, more than that, I wanted to run. He unleashed feelings inside me—a strange kind of want—and I didn’t know what they meant. All I understood was that deep inside I craved his kisses. I craved melting in his embrace, mouth against mouth, skin against skin, fire burning through us.
I realized he was like fire, and if I didn’t stop this, I was going to get burned.
Clearing my throat, I averted my gaze and pulled out of his embrace. His face remained blank, but his eyes betrayed his displeasure.
“I’m sorry, I—” I moistened my lips and straightened my clothes, as if to ward off any attraction I felt for him.
“There’s nothing to feel sorry about,” Chase whispered. “You’re not ready, and I’m not going to push you.”
He didn’t need to. His mere presence was temptation enough.
I smiled bitterly, keeping my thoughts to myself. “Thanks.”
“You said your family was old-fashioned. Clint doesn’t look very old-fashioned to me.”
He was curious. Everyone would be, given the circumstances. I knew the question would come eventually, but I didn’t expect it so soon.
“He’s not,” I said briskly in the hope that Chase would drop the topic.
“Why did you lie to me, then?” he asked.
I looked up, expecting fury, but there was only curiosity. “I wasn’t sure you’d understand.”
He frowned. “Why the need for all of this?” he persisted. “They seemed to accept our engagement just fine.”
“Look.” I hesitated as I sorted through my thoughts. Chase had turned out to be a nice person, but I couldn’t trust him. “Can we talk about it another time?”
Maybe never?
I raised my gaze to meet his, and I almost choked seeing the hurt in his eyes. One rejection had been bearable; two were one too many. And then his lips bent into the beginning of a smile that lit up his face.
God, I loved it when he smiled.
“You owe me dinner…for all I’m doing tonight,” Chase said.
“What? I’m paying for this one already, so, technically, you owe me.” I smiled, thankful for the change in topic.
“I’ll gladly pay if only you turn up.” He brushed his thumb over my cheek and trailed it to the back of my neck, settling there. For a second, I thought he’d pull me to him again, and I almost forgot to breathe in the hope he’d go for it, knowing this time I wouldn’t deny him. But Chase didn’t follow my brain’s plea; he just stared at me, a strange smile playing on his gorgeous lips.
“You’re a mystery, Laurie, you know that?”
I moistened my lips, both mesmerized and threatened by his proximity. He was leaning in too close for comfort, his breath too warm and appealing to ignore. In a bold moment, I pushed up on my toes and placed a soft kiss on his lips. It was barely a second, but enough to send a jolt of pleasure through me.
“Ah, the tease.” Chase arms reached for my waist, but I was faster. Laughing, I dashed past him down the corridor and into the eating area, faintly aware of his steps following close behind.
The magnitude of what I had done only hit me the moment I sat down and looked into Jude’s inquiring face and her widening eyes, glistening with realization. She pulled out her cell phone and began typing furiously. An instant later, Chase appeared, and my phone vibrated, signaling a text message. Ignoring his heated gaze, I read the text.
You were in there forever. What did you two do? Tell me it involved a lot of tongue.
I shook my head at Jude, and she narrowed her eyes at me. Then she began to type again. This time, Chase pulled out his phone and peered up at Jude. She didn’t believe me so naturally, being Jude, she had to seek other sources to dig up the truth. Chase threw me a sideways glance and then winked at Jude.
Oh, god.
Didn’t he know he was stoking fire with fire?
I felt like sinking into the floor and praying for the earth to swallow me whole.
Jude’s expression turned into one of triumph as she pushed her cell phone back into her handbag and waved the service personnel over, demanding another round of drinks.
“How’s the job hunting going?” Clint addressed me after the waiter had topped up my glass. I took a large gulp and let the vile, sour taste of red wine travel down my throat, barely able to hide my grimace.
Anything to get me through the evening.
“It’s doing great,” Jude said. “In fact, Laurie has a few very promising opportunities lined up. We can’t decide.” She laughed, and Shannon joined in politely, her eyes focused on me like a hawk’s.
“Is that why you haven’t cashed the last few checks I sent you?” Clint asked.
I nodded, more confident than I was feeling. “Yeah, something like that,” I mumbled, and took another gulp of my wine, downing my glass. The waiter hurried over for a refill. Even though my brain screamed out a warning, I didn’t stop him.
My credit cards were maxed out to the limit. The bank had already called to inquire about my ability to start repaying my student loan, and I had started to feel embarrassed about the fact that Jude had started paying more than half our rent a long time ago. I hadn’t cashed Clint’s checks because I didn’t want the money, not because I didn’t need it.
“Maybe you should put your pride aside when it comes to your finances,” Clint said.
“Darling. We talked about this, remember?” Shannon said warningly, but he brushed her off with a wave of his hand.
“No, she’s old enough to deal with it,” Clint said, turning to me. “We know about your troubles and the fact that you haven’t been able to find a good job since leaving college. We’ve had phone calls from various credit card companies, people asking about you.” The way he said it, he made me sound like I had borrowed money from the local mafia.
I rolled my eyes.
“You know we’re here to help, Laurie,” Clint continued. “And if you want to get back on your feet on your own, then that’s fine. But living here on your own with no support isn’t going to help you do that. Move back home. Start working for the company.”
“Just for a year,” Shannon cut in. “Until you’ve paid off your debts.”
My hand clutched at the wine glass for support like it was my safe railing as my face caught fire.
“I’m fine. Like I said before, I need my independence.”
Trust Clint to start washing my dirty laundry in public in front of the one guy I actually liked. I caught Chase’s expression from the corner of my eye and almost tumbled under the table, mortified. His eyes were cast downward, his face rigid and unreadable, his mouth framed by two hard lines.
“We want you back home,” Clint insisted, adding firmly, “where you belong.”
“Only until you sort yourself out,” Shannon cut in again, this time with a worried smile. She probably meant well, but in my rising fury I couldn’t see past the fact that she had no idea what she was talking about. She had no idea what it meant to actually want to work for your money.
“I don’t see that happening any time soon,” I said with enough determination to hush even Clint.
Uncomfortable silence ensued. Sensing a change in the atmosphere, I took another gulp of my drink. I could almost taste the tension in the air, wafting between Clint and me the way it always did when we head-butted.
I didn’t want Chase to see me like that because it wasn’t the real me, but I just couldn’t help myself around Clint. He brought out the worst in me.
“But he just wants to help you, Laurie,” Shannon said, obviously eager to resume the conversation. “You should—”
I cut her short. “Stay out of this, Shannon. I’m not returning to Waterfront Shore.”
No matter what. It would be stupid to believe his lies.
“You’ve always
been too stubborn for your own good.” Clint heaved an exasperated sigh. “Just like your mother. We’ll talk about this later.”
“Great, but nothing you could possibly say will change my mind.” I bit my tongue hard to keep back a snarky remark.
Chase squeezed my hand under the table, his warm touch coloring my mood a darker shade of grim. I yanked my hand away and waved the waiter to bring another bottle of wine. By the time we finished dinner, I was a giggly mess and hanging onto Chase’s arm.
“Laurie,” a deep, sexy voice rumbled in my ear. “I’ll take you home, okay?”
“But I don’t want to go home,” I slurred, my head spinning, and not in a good way. “I want to get away. Far, far away.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
I giggled. No, he didn’t know what he was talking about, which was why he didn’t know that we both had to run.
No turning back. Just keep on running…until we’re safe.
I giggled again and flinched at the pangs of pain shooting through my head, traveling right into my stomach. The night around us spun faster and faster as I was tucked into the back seat of a car and driven away.
“Get some sleep, and you’ll be okay tomorrow.”
I opened my eyes to regard the sexy stranger whose beautiful voice kept caressing my most secret spots, and I smiled up at him. His fingers gently brushed my hair out of my face and settled on my cheek. I leaned into his soft touch, wondering why he couldn’t see the truth the way I did. Why couldn’t he just see past the shadows of the human soul?
“Go away,” I whispered. “Go away as quickly as you can.”
Before it’s too late, I added in my mind, but the words died on my lips as I closed my eyes and fell into oblivion. The last thing I remembered was the soft touch of his hand on my cheek.
Chapter 11
The catchy pop tune blared through the room, penetrating my head like a sharp blade. Groaning, I turned and flinched as a hard throb began to pound against the walls of my brain, making me want to hide under the sheets and never come out again. Only, at some point, the pounding became so unbearable, I was forced to leave the safety of my cocoon and venture into the late morning sun.
“Good morning, sunshine,” Jude sang from her kitchen stool, looking up from her computer screen. She clapped the screen shut, bathing the kitchen in heaven-sent silence, and pushed a warm cup of black coffee across the counter toward me. I wrapped my hand around it and downed it in three big gulps.
Only then did I manage a husky, “Thanks.”
“You look like shit.” Jude pointed at my crumpled, oversized shirt.
“You’ve just summed up the way I feel.” I slumped onto a stool and placed my elbows on the table, my gaze already searching for my next caffeine fix.
Jude chuckled and refilled my cup, then went on to make me an egg omelette, because she was a firm believer in the importance of eating breakfast, which had always been one of the few things she and I kept arguing about.
“What a night, huh?” She placed a plate with some yellowish pulp in front of me and pushed a slice of toast into my hand, silently commanding me to eat up. Just looking at the yellow mush made my stomach turn. I began moving chunks around my plate, but didn’t dare take a bite in case my nausea flared up.
Great night…if only I could remember more than a few blurry pictures and pieces of broken conversation.
“Eat up,” she said, “or would you rather I fed you?”
“Yes, Mom.” I pushed a chunk of egg white into my mouth and forced myself to chew slowly, realizing it was quite nice.
“It wasn’t as bad as I had expected,” I said, referring to the evening before.
“I was being sarcastic, Laurie,” she exclaimed. “It was horrendous. One of the most cringe-worthy evenings of my life.” She shook her head and let out a huff of air. “I was counting the seconds until we could get out of there. I’ll tell you up front—I’ll never ever do that again.”
Trust Jude to tell it as it was. No sparing my feelings.
“You were embarrassed,” I said, faintly remembering thinking something along those lines.
“Are you kidding me? I was embarrassed for you. If my stepfather talked to me like that in front of my so-called fiancé, I would have spewed fire at him.”
I had no idea what Clint had said, but I could only imagine it must have been awful if Jude felt that way. She had always been on my team.
“Was it that bad?” I suppressed a smile.
“Bad? Are you kidding me? Try disastrous. Completely humiliating. You should have seen Chase’s face. He was mortified.”
I shook my head, unsure what she was referring to. The only thing I remembered was Clint talking about me going home while I wished I could sink into the bottom of my drink and drown in it.
“No wonder we couldn’t pry you off the wine bottle. You don’t even like wine,” she continued, oblivious to my thoughts. “Now I see why I can’t possibly let you move back home.”
I smiled at her weak attempt at infusing humor. “They’d turn me into an alcoholic,” I said, wondering what the heck Clint had said.
“Exactly. And then we’d have to go together to rehab, because there’s no way I’d let you go alone.” She leaned over the table and grabbed my hand, forcing me to look at her. “While you were asleep, I mixed you my top-secret hangover cocktail.”
She went over to the fridge and filled a glass of green liquid, then handed me the blend with an encouraging smile. “Drink up. Trust me, you’ll feel better in no time. This is the only cure that will beat the mother of all hangovers.”
I eyed it warily, then smelled it. Faintly, I could detect the scent of green tea, kale, and cucumber.
“Do I really have to?” I said, taking a tender sip.
“It will help you rehydrate. Now drink up. You’ll need it.” Her expression turned serious again. “Chase wants to talk to you.”
Oh, god.
Groaning, I buried my head in my hands as I realized the magnitude of the situation. I almost never consumed alcohol, meaning I had absolutely no immunity against it. My threshold was basically nonexistent. From the few times I had been drunk in my entire life, I knew I was horrible while under the influence. My speech was slurred, and I said the most ludicrous things.
“How did I even get home?” I asked, looking up, eager to change the subject.
“We drove you.”
I didn’t need to ask who “we” was to know the answer.
“Tell me you didn’t let him tuck me into bed.”
Jude’s face remained all wide-eyed innocence. “What was I supposed to do? Do you think I’m a bodybuilder or something? You’re too heavy to carry.”
I stared at her. No way was I going to discuss my weight issues. Yes, my employment situation and tendency to comfort eat had caused me to pile on a few layers of fat, but it was no big deal. Nothing a few extra sessions at the gym couldn’t solve.
“At least I’m still wearing my clothes. That should count for something,” I muttered to myself, then looked up with renewed interest. I paused before asking, “What did I say?”
“Nothing.” Jude shook her head, her expression a blank mask. The high ring in her voice didn’t fool me, though.
“Jude, what did I say?”
She sighed, and in that instant I knew I could never see Chase again, not after the embarrassing performance he must have witnessed the previous night.
The only thing more embarrassing than an embarrassing performance is having too many nasty thoughts about other people in your head and not knowing which one you actually spoke out aloud.
“I’m going out.” I jumped up and grabbed my plate, placing it in the sink on my way out, leaving Jude’s hangover concoction unfinished.
Jude followed me. “Where are you going?”
“I don’t know where I’m going. Just out.”
“Why?”
“Because this is too much. I thought I could d
eal with this all—with Clint, with—” I choked on the words the past. After a few years away from home, I had thought I’d put enough physical and emotional distance between the past and myself to react in a more detached manner, but last night’s disaster had shown that I was nowhere near detached. Seeing that the present was just as awful, I couldn’t descend back into the abyss that had once been my life.
With a shrug, I ignored Jude’s stare and forced myself to take a few gulps of her self-made smoothie, which didn’t taste as bad as it looked.
“Laurie, you can’t leave. Clint’s coming over in an hour,” Jude said imploringly. “I know the guy’s a pain in the ass, but Shannon called to inquire about you. Apparently, they’re leaving today and want to see you before they head to the airport. It’s just for five minutes.”
“No way.” A sarcastic snort escaped my throat. Even if he took the next plane back home, he’d never be completely gone. But Jude didn’t know. No one did.
“You said you wanted to help,” I said. “Please call them back and tell them it was nice seeing them, but I’m not available. If they persist, tell them I’m busy and I won’t be able to talk for the next week or so. Please. I promise I’ll make it up to you.”
I closed the door, then buried myself under the covers when my cell rang from an unknown number. Figuring whoever was calling would leave a message if it was important, I placed the cell phone on my nightstand and was preparing myself to go back to sleeping off my headache when the doorbell rang.
Please, no.
Was there no hope for peace in my own home?
Heaving an exasperated sigh, I sat up when chatter carried over and Jude called my name. With a groan, I pulled the covers over my head, ignoring her. Seconds later, the door was thrown open.
“Laurie,” Jude said. “You need to get up. Someone wants to talk to you.” Her voice carried a hint of worry.