He sat down and looked across the counter at her, his mind working in overdrive as he tried figuring out the right words for this situation because everything he was thinking of was utterly terrible.
“You know how people say that what you say when you are drunk is actually what you mean?” he asked, and Missy pushed a luxurious lock of her hair behind her ear.
“What people?” she asked. “Which people say that exactly?”
Matthew shook his head.
“Everyone says that, Missy. And perhaps what I was telling you last night was exactly what I meant,” he said.
“That you would not want to sleep with me ever again?” she asked. “Because when we went back to your room, you had a very different way of showing what you had just told me.”
Matthew ran his fingers through his hair and took another sip of his water.
“Missy, listen. You are a great publicist. I admit that, but this thing…” He waved his finger between them and shook his head. “This should never happen again. Matter of fact, it should have never happened in the first place.”
Missy looked into Matthew’s eyes for a long minute before she spoke again.
“You realize that I do not chase after a guy, right? Any guy for that matter,” she started, and he nodded.
“Well, I never really asked you to chase after me now, did I?” he asked and then sighed when he realized how arrogant he sounded. “And I did not mean to sound like a total and complete douche.”
“That’s because you are acting like a total and complete douche,” Missy said matter of factly as she flipped her hair over her shoulder.
“You see?” he asked. “This is why I wanted to keep things professional, and sleeping with you was one of the biggest mistakes I made, I can own up to that. But the fact is that this was a bad idea, Missy. You know it and I know it.”
She licked her lips in an ever so sexy way before she got off the chair. He could not help but look at her as she ran her fingers through her thick mane.
“Listen, Matthew. If you want us to have a strictly professional relationship, we can do that. But I cannot handle this back and forth...”
“Missy, there is no back and forth,” Matthew said cutting her short. “I fucked you while drunk. And quite honestly, I was so out of it, I don’t even remember how it was. But that is all it is. I am totally committed to Matt the Nomad…everything about it. Working on the brand, the app…but that is the end of us.”
“You keep telling yourself that,” Missy said, smiling seductively.
Matthew took a long deep breath and took another sip of his water. It was all he could do not to explode.
“Just so you know, these are the recommended web designers for your redesign. You will need something new and hip to hype up that app you are working on,” she said as she reached into her bag and pulled out an envelope. “I would have sat in and made sure you chose the right candidate, but it is quite obvious that you are not in the mood for any of my good ideas.”
“Show yourself out, Missy,” he said in an exhausted voice before taking another sip of his water.
But Missy did not leave immediately. She lingered for a long minute, and for a second there, he wished he could just chuck her out of the door without any repercussions. He was not very sure what she was waiting for or hoping for. It was like she almost wanted him to walk around the counter and just take her into his arms, but he’d made that mistake one too many times. And even though he hated the sight of her, he could not really stomach the thought of having to go through the process of getting a new publicist all over again.
“See you tomorrow, Matt,” Missy said seductively, and he almost rolled his eyes.
“No, I won’t,” he pointed out. “I will be taking the next few days off to shake off the last few days.”
“Fine,” Missy said passively before she headed for the door.
Matthew closed his eyes and took a long deep breath just as Yolanda walked into the kitchen.
“That girl is trouble. I told you from the very first time I saw her, remember?” she asked, and Matthew nodded.
“If only I had listened to you then.”
“So,” Yolanda started as she walked to where she was and looked right into his eyes. “You slept with her again, didn’t you?” she asked, and Matthew suddenly felt his blood chill in his veins. He did not really have an answer for her because the obvious answer would earn him a slap at the very least. At the same time, he wanted to lie and say that he had not, but at the same time, he knew that lying to Yolanda was going to be a waste of time.
“Well?” she pressed before he had enough time to even process his answer, and for some reason, he found himself nodding and just as he thought, Yolanda smacked his hand.
“Ouch,” he said as he pulled his hand away.
“You deserve so much more than that,” she said. “I told you that woman is crazy.”
Mathew exhaled loudly and ran his hand through his hair.
“I know…I don’t know why I find her so irresistible even after…everything.”
Yolanda shook her head and walked to one of the cabinets.
“Because the craziest ones are always the ones you can never seem to avoid. Trust me, I know about that a little too well,” she said in a cynical voice. “Given a choice I would have never even looked at Fernando, but he was so…ah…what can I say? He was perfect. He is perfect…” Her voice trailed off when she noticed the look that Matthew was giving her.
“Didn’t Fernando go to jail for being a cartel enforcer?” he asked, and she shrugged.
“Alleged cartel enforcer, and you know as well as I do that there is nothing like a fair trial in Mexico, right?” she asked, and he shrugged. She grabbed a rag and began buffing the counter as he looked at her. “Callarte! You don’t know what it feels to have someone like Fernando look at you the way he looked at me.”
Matt smiled.
“Technically, I didn’t say anything…wait, there is no technicality about it. I literally did not say anything.”
“Well, I can hear you think…a little too loudly if I may say so,” she said as she pushed the plate of churros towards him.
“You can hear me think?” he asked. “Are you serious?”
“Just shut up and have your churros.”
He reached for a churro and took a bite before he looked up at Yolanda.
“Maybe we need to get some kind of security feature and make sure that she does not come within a few hundred feet of you,” Yolanda said, and he laughed.
“They have a name for that, you know. It’s called a restraining order,” he said matter of factly.
Yolanda nodded.
“Yes. You need to get one of those,” she said as she looked into his eyes. And for a moment there, he was not so sure whether she was just one of those people fond of making eye contact or if she was really serious. But over the last few years, he had learned not to question anything Yolanda said, whether she was joking or not.
“Why don’t you just join me for some churros, Yolanda?” he said as he reached for another churro.
“Yeah, and then we can discuss how to get rid of that loca…” Her voice trailed off when he gave her a warning look that made her rethink her words. “That mujer loca.”
“That’s more like it,” Matthew said, smiling.
“But if you want her taken care of, I know a few people back in Juarez…” Yolanda started before Matthew gave her the same look he had given her just seconds earlier.
“We will not even think of committing a felony, Yolanda,” he said, and she shrugged.
“I was thinking of embarrassing her…get some fabricated nudes out there or something,” she said, a little surprise in her voice. “Just what did you think I was talking about?”
He shrugged. “Just eat the churros, Yolanda.”
Chapter 2
When Natasha woke up the following morning, the conversation she’d had with Travis was still a little too fresh on
her mind. She took a long deep breath as she glanced over at the photo on her nightstand. She had been thinking of putting it away for the longest time, but even then, almost two and a half years later, she could never find it in herself to simply do it. As much as she wanted to, it was like she was waking up on that fateful winter morning when she got the call…
It was always a bittersweet situation when Kyle was back home from deployment. There was the joy that came with him being home, but at the same time, she hated thinking that she had just a few days before that phone rang again and Kyle would suddenly pack up and leave, heading right back into a war zone. And she had felt the same way the last time he came around. Being in his arms, feeling him hold her close was one of the best feelings she had ever known. There was just something about seeing him again that always seemed to get her in a good mood for reasons she would never really understand. But even though she hated herself for hating what he did for a living, she always convinced herself that it was all for the greater good. Sharing him with the world was for the greater good. After all, he was sacrificing himself on behalf of his country and that was enough to make her proud of him. Not that she ever needed a reason to.
When he last got home, she could not wait to just get home and spend some quality time with him. And who could blame her? It had been a rather short deployment but long enough for her. By the time they got to the apartment, Natasha could tell that there was something different about his homecoming this time around. And she was right. As soon as they walked into the apartment, Kyle grabbed her and pinned her against the closed door. He kissed her lips and her neck before he made his way back to her mouth and gave her a long luscious kiss. He practically ripped the clothes off of her as he went on kissing her, caressing her, showing her just how much he wanted her. How much he had craved her. He took her on the floor. On the couch. And finally on the bed. It was almost two hours later when he finally collapsed on her exhaustedly. She was panting as was he which was understandable. That was some workout he had taken her through. A small moan escaped her lips when he slipped out of her.
“Do you ever intend on getting us somewhere near food? The kitchen perhaps?” she asked, and he smiled.
“Well, I had to show you just how much I have missed spending time with you,” he said in an exhausted tone, and she forced out a laugh. She rolled to her side and looked at him.
“I missed you,” she said in a soft voice, and he gently stroked her cheek.
“I missed you too…you have no idea just how much.”
“Please tell me you don’t have to leave for at least the next ten years or something,” she said, taking his hand in hers. “I hate it when you are away and the last twenty months have been…hell to say the least.”
“I’m back now, baby, and that’s all that matters,” he said, smiling. He was gently stroking her hair as he looked into her eyes.
She loved how put together he looked. Even after spending so much time in an army base out of the country. But those were the perks of working in military. Looking perfect enough all day every single day.
He was silent for a long moment before he spoke again.
“I want more of this,” he said in a soft voice. “More of us.”
Natasha shrugged. “I am always here,” she said.
“No, you don’t understand. I want more than what we have. I want to be able to tell my commanding officer that I am going home to my wife rather than my girlfriend. I want to share in the joy of knowing that I have a bigger family than just my parents,” he said, and Natasha’s mouth slightly parted. He looked into her brown eyes and smiled when he realized that she had made out just what he wanted to say to her.
“Are you saying what I think you are saying?” she asked, and he nodded.
“Yes, I am.”
“I need to hear it,” she said in a whisper, and he raised an eyebrow over the other.
“What?” he asked, a little confused.
“I need to hear the exact words from your mouth,” she said, and he nodded.
“Alright,” he said in a soft voice as he gently pushed a lock of her hair behind her ear. “Natasha Bailey, will you do me the honor and make me the happiest man in the world by being my wife?”
Her smile grew wider and she nodded.
“Yes,” she said in a soft voice. “Of course yes.”
She reached behind his neck and pulled him close to give him a long, deep kiss.
“You know, if you pulled away long enough, I could be able to get your ring.”
She raised an eyebrow.
“There is a ring?” she asked, and he nodded.
“What kind of proposal would this be if there was no ring?” he asked, and she bit her lower lip before she leaned in and kissed him again. She pulled away and shrugged.
“Go,” she said. “Go get the ring.”
Her heart was racing as she watched him walk out to the living room. It was only a few minutes, but it felt like forever before he finally made his way back to the bed. She was grinning widely as he walked back to the bed holding a small black velvet case.
“I had hoped to do this differently. Later this week with everyone there. Your family…my family,” he started, and she shook her head.
“I don’t care how you do it. All that matters is that you have done it,” she said as he sat on the edge of the bed and slowly opened the case. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw the beautiful ring sitting on the cushion. And as she looked at the ring, she could not help but feel that the ring seemed familiar. She looked at him and shook her head. “This ring is…” she started before her voice trailed off.
“My grandmother’s ring,” he said as he pulled it out of the cushion. “I told her that I was thinking of making it official with you, and she was a little too happy to give it to me. She said that there was no one she would rather see it on.”
Natasha sighed loudly when he gently slipped it on. It was a vintage round cut stone set and one of the most beautiful pieces of jewelry she had ever seen. She looked at him and bit her lower lip.
“Kyle…this is so much more than I ever imagined…too much,” she said, and he took her hands in his.
“And you deserve nothing but the best,” he said before kissing her hand. “So, is it too early to start talking about a date or should I just let you get settled into the whole engagement thing right now?”
She smiled and shrugged.
“I have been with you for three and a half years, Kyle. Let’s just set a date already,” she said smiling, and he nodded.
“I don’t have to ship back out for at least four months thanks to the back-to-back tours I’ve had lately,” he said matter of factly, and she shrugged.
“Then let’s start the planning process right away,” Natasha said smiling.
Those were the same words that she wished she had never said because somehow planning a wedding made everything different. She did not know what it was exactly, but she was suddenly not the same person who had simply been dating Kyle. There was so much more to their relationship now and she could feel it.
For the next few weeks, all she could do was obsess about her big day. She had never been one to dream of the big princess wedding with her in a ball gown, but even with their plans of having a small intimate ceremony with just under two hundred guests, Natasha had every plan of making every minute of her ‘small’ big day count. She had already settled on an unconventional wedding dress rather than going with the more obvious ball gown or lace wedding dress that had grown ever so common over the last few years. Instead of that, she had chosen a beaded sleeveless floor length dress that was both simple and elegant to flatter her then perfectly curvy body. She was going to pair the dress with a pair of lace peep toe pumps and wear her normally curly hair up. But she had never thought that the day she had chosen to try on her dress was the day she would get what was the worst news of her life…or so she thought at the time.
She had just put on the dress and the shoes and was a
dmiring her reflection in the mirror when she heard the front door open.
“Tasha?” Kyle called out, and she gasped silently.
“I’m in the bedroom…but don’t come in,” she said quickly.
“Is everything all right?”
“Yeah…yes…I am just trying out my dress and you can’t see me in it yet,” she said as she leaned against the closed bedroom door. “It’s bad luck, remember?”
She heard Kyle laugh.
“I know,” he said in a soft voice.
There was a long second of silence before he finally spoke again.
“I got a call,” he said. “While on my way back here.”
Natasha took a long deep breath and sighed. She was not sure what she was supposed to say or do. But the fact that he had got a call on the same day he had gone to look for housing in Fort Meade, the military base they were supposed to call home in just a few weeks, could not have been good news. She could tell that much simply by the tone of his voice.
“What’s going on, Kyle?” she asked. “Is everything all right?”
“I just got new orders,” he said in a soft voice. “I deploy in two days.”
“But you said you were home for four months,” she said.
“I know.”
“It’s only been six weeks.”
Kyle took a long deep breath and sighed.
“I know, and I am sorry, but there is not much I can do about it,” he said. “It is some kind of emergency mission…I wish I could tell you more about it, but I can’t.”
Natasha closed her eyes.
“I know, it’s classified,” she said.
“Yeah.”
She kicked off the shoes and took off the dress before she put on a bathrobe. She opened the door to find him leaning against the doorframe.
“Hey,” he said when she walked out. He forced out a smile and gently held the back of her neck before he kissed her softly. “I’m sorry about all this.”
She bit her lip and rested her head on his shoulder.
“Two days,” she said in a soft voice. “The ten weeks I had left with you were barely enough, but two days…” Her voice trailed off and she shook her head.
Her Older Alpha Page 15