By the time I arrived, campus security had pulled Sophia off Jen, but the damage was done – she had shoved her to the ground and knocked her unconscious, as well as landing a couple of firm blows to her stomach in the meantime. She wasn’t terribly badly hurt, but even seeing her like that, a couple of bruises on her head and passed out cold, was enough to get my blood fiery in my veins. I was so fucking angry – if I had been let at Sophia myself, I couldn’t have been held responsible for what I might have done to her. She had stalked Jen, no doubt terrified her, and actually, physically hurt her – and for what? To prove a point to me, or to herself? She was fucking crazy for doing this, and I would never let her forget it.
I was in the ambulance with Jen as we rushed towards the hospital. They wouldn’t let me hold her hand, as they were too busy rushing to make sure that the baby was alright – but by the time we got to the hospital, a few of them were exchanging head-shakes and frowns that told me things hadn’t gone the way they wanted them to. I closed my eyes and clasped her fingers in mine, even though she couldn’t feel them, hoping she could sense the love I was sending her way.
It was so damn quiet in there. That was the worst part. I wanted to call her family, her friends, to let them know what was going on and that she was going to be alright, but I had no idea who any of them were, where they might be, or if she’d want them to know anything about the saga that had unfolded over the past couple of months. As far as I knew, none of them knew about her pregnancy – she’d told me the story behind how she’d come to need the money, and I figured that she was keeping everything on the down-low. But I felt bad, knowing that I would be the only one she was going to wake up to; I wanted someone else to be there for her, for her to know just how deeply she was loved and cared for. She deserved that, especially after the bullshit of what had happened today.
I yawned – I was exhausted, even though I had a good night’s sleep. I felt as though the day had stripped all the energy I’d had out of me. Sophia had been arrested, obviously, and I imagined it would be the last I’d see of her. The only thing connecting us had been the baby, and now-
“Nathan?”
I lifted my head and looked into Jen’s eyes, and I felt my heart swell for her. There was a slightly swelling above her eye, and a cartoon-style bandage wrapped around the top of her head. Her gaze was a little bleary but she squeezed my hand.
“Hey, I’m okay,” she comforted me at once, and I squeezed her hand back.
“You shouldn’t have to be making me feel better,” I pointed out with a small smile, and she rolled her eyes good-naturedly.
“I’ll do what I like,” she remarked, lifting herself up a little in bed and wincing slightly. I stood up and pulled her pillow up, fussing to make sure she was comfortable.
“Don’t move too much,” I ordered, and she grinned up at me.
“How long have you been here?” She asked. “How long have I been here, for that matter?”
“Just a few hours,” I assured her. “I would have called your family, but…”
“Oh, thank God you didn’t,” she sighed. “I don’t want anyone else knowing about this.”
“Too much to explain?”
“Way too much, especially now,” she sighed. She reached up and gingerly touched the bandage around her head. “Fuck. That’s not good.”
“You’re going to be okay, thank God,” I assured her. “I checked in with the doctor. He said you were going to be alright, given a few days to recuperate.”
“As long as I don’t miss too much class,” She remarked, and then her face dropped and her hands flew to her stomach. “Shit, what about the baby?”
I took a deep breath, and dropped my head. This was still a little hard to process, even though it was probably for the best.
“You lost it,” I looked up into her eyes, scanning her face for a reaction. “I think that was Sophia’s entire point. She was…she was crazy. I’m so sorry this happened…”
“You’re babbling,” she cut me off with a gentle smile, and reached out to touch my face. She closed her eyes for a moment, and then opened them again.
“I’m so sorry,” she looked intently at me. “You were the one who wanted this baby, not me…”
“I was only doing it for her,” I assured her. “And I’m sorry I put you through this. All of it. Any of it.”
“We would never have met if you hadn’t,” she pointed out. “And that would have been the worst thing.”
“Are you going to be alright?” I asked, and she paused for a moment, thinking. I liked that she didn’t just try to feed me what she thought I wanted to hear; she took what I asked her seriously, didn’t bullshit or lie just because she thought it would make me happy.
“I think so,” she nodded, her shoulders sagging slightly. “I’m just exhausted. Once I get better, I think I’ll be able to…you know, move on from everything that happened.”
“I’ll support you, you know that, right?” I promised her. “Whatever you need. I’m here for you.”
“I just need you,” She replied, a soft smile appearing on her face once more. Even despite all of this, I found myself happy; happy because she was here, happy because she wanted me here, happy because I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. Yes, this last day had been one of the worst I could imagine, and I knew the two of us weren’t over and done with it yet. But I was with her, and she was awake and with me, and that was all I gave a damn about.
“I love you.”
The words had escaped my lips before I had a chance to think about whether now was the time to say it. She blinked once, and then a smile so big that it looked like it might split her face in two spread across her features.
“I love you too,” she replied, sounding a little surprised that she was saying it back, but it felt so right – so obvious, so natural. It had taken this for me to realize how much I loved her, how much I needed her. But now I was here, I knew it was the right choice – that the first time I had seen, my reaction, that instinctive knowledge that there was something lasting and real in our chemistry. That I loved her. Without question or without doubt.
Epilogue
I pressed my head against his chest and sighed. A whole year. Well, nearly.
“Our first anniversary, huh?” Nathan remarked, wrapping his fingers around mine and playing with them for a moment. “What are we going to do?”
“I don’t know,” I sighed. “Haven’t thought about it yet.”
“Too busy with your classes?”
“Jealous?” I teased. After the incident with Sophia, I had pulled out of my courses to focus on recuperating and getting my life back on track – I had to deal with some anxiety and physical problems after the attack, and I wanted to make sure that they didn’t interfere with my studies, so I decided to push back my final semester for a few months. It had been good to take some time off, especially after the ridiculous bullshit that had gone down with Sophia. I had to testify against her in court, and watched her as she was put away for a few months and issued with a no-contact order against Nathan and I.
I felt this sadness, too, when the date I would have had the baby came and went – melancholy, nothing more, the thought of what could have been if things had been different plaguing me some nights. But I knew that what had happened had been for the best – it was like my mom always told me, everything is as it should be. I had told her everything, eventually, sitting her down once when my anxiety was getting too much to handle and telling her the truth about all of it. She had been so distraught at first; it was the first time she’d heard about Damien, about the pregnancy and then the lack of it, about Nathan, after all. But she came around and did everything she could to support me, even flying up to meet Nathan for the first time a few months before.
“You got a good one there, Jenny,” she murmured in my ear as we dropped her off at the airport, and I grinned against her hair. She knew best. She always did. It was good to know that she saw the goodness I saw in
him too. I trusted her judgement even more than I trusted my own. I remember looking up at Nathan as she left, watching him as he kept an eye on her to make sure she got through security okay, and smiling; because I knew that I had landed a man who was good above all else. Kind. Sweet. Caring. All the things that I had struggled so hard to find in the men I’d dated before him. I adored him, was head-over-heels, and still thought back to that day in the hospital, the first time he’d told me he loved me, and realizing that fuck, I loved him back and I didn’t want that to change.
He had been so supportive as I’d taken time off to recover. Other guys, they might have tried to hurry me along, to fix things themselves, but he let me take my time and gave me his time and patience and support no matter what. Some nights, when I had to cancel dates because I was too anxious to leave my dorm room, he would come round and bring takeout and just hang out and watch a movie with me. He would never make me feel bad. He was my rock, and he had made it clear that he always would be, no matter what. I felt so loved when I was around him, something I had never felt before when I was with the guys I was dating; I always felt as though I was chasing their approval, trying to wedge myself into the boxes that they had set out for me. He wanted me just as I was, and it was the best feeling in the whole world.
That night, we were just relaxing at his apartment; it was nearly Christmas again, and I had helped him decorate the place, buying a cheap tree and covering it in tacky decorations and fairy lights while we shared mulled wine and cheap Christmas-themed candy. We were lying together on the couch, in front of the fire, and I felt so utterly content that I could have dozed off in his arms right there and then. But he had other ideas.
“You know,” He suddenly spoke, and I opened my eyes and looked up at him. He had grown his hair out a little, and it suited him – he was spending less time at the office and was a bit more laid-back, and it was reflected in the way he looked now too.
“What?” I asked, grinning.
“I was going to save this for our anniversary, but I don’t want it to be this big thing,” he disentangled himself from me and got to his feet, heading towards the bedroom, and continued speaking. “I just want it to be the two of us.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked, stretching and yawning and following him into the bedroom. And when I got I there, my jaw dropped.
He was standing next to the dresser and there was a ring box in his hand. Before I could say a word, he got down on one knee and popped the lid open.
“Got to do this properly,” he grinned, and I stood there, still speechless.
“I was going to have a whole speech prepared, but there’s nothing I can say to you that you don’t already know about the way I feel,” he smiled up at me. “Will you marry me, Jen? I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you.”
“Yes,” I gasped, before I could think about it. “YES!”
He stood up and slipped the ring on to my finger, and I jumped up to toss my arms around his neck. The tiredness I’d been feeling was wiped up by the elation and excitement at what had just happened; he scooped me off the floor and swept me around, before placing me back down and planting a kiss on my lips. I felt my heart sing with excitement. This was happening. It was really happening.
“I love you too,” I murmured against his mouth, and then, with nothing but joy in my heart, I lost myself to his kiss once more.
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The Holiday Surprise Page 6