His gentle but firm tone forced me to open my eyes. I didn’t feel comfortable with looking at him while he was inside of me. I felt awkward at first as I looked at him, but then a level of intimacy that I had not felt before rushed over me.
He didn’t hold back as his hips thrust hard into me. I moaned and tried to get my arms free, but he wouldn’t allow it. I felt like I couldn’t keep looking at him, and I tried to look away, but each time I did, he ordered me to open my eyes again.
“Look at me, Isabella,” Marcus said in a seductively calm voice.
His voice felt like silk, and I got wet with each word he spoke. His eyes looked at me with desire, and I knew he wanted more than just a quick fuck in his bed. I felt more from him. I felt him there with me.
He let go of my arms, and I moved them to his back. I held onto him as our bodies moved in time with each other. Thrust after thrust, I felt my body building up to an explosion. I closed my eyes to concentrate on the feeling.
Marcus put his hand on my cheek gently. The same cheek that was now swelling up from his hand hitting it.
“Keep them open; I want to see your face when you cum,” he said.
His voice was firm and full of desire. I could tell that watching me cum was going to excite him a lot. I decided to just go with it. I pushed down my own insecurities and looked Marcus right in the eyes.
I held on tight to him as he thrust his body into mine. I bit my lip as the tingle of an orgasm started deep inside me. I moved my hips hard against his and wanted more. I wanted the eruption. I needed to feel the explosion and was going to keep my eyes fixated on Marcus’s and let him watch my face when the moment happened.
Faster, harder, and our bodies finally met at just the right moment. He thrust into me, and I let out a scream of desire. I used everything I had to keep my eyes open and looking at his eyes. It made the orgasm so intense. I held on tight as he continued with a couple thrusts and watched as my body shook with delight.
I arched and moved against his body as the orgasm made its way through my body. More and more I wanted, so I kept moving my hips against him; Marcus met my movements with his own thrusts, and soon I had come as much as I thought was humanly possible.
I let go of his body, and my arms collapsed onto the bed in exhaustion. I finally closed my eyes and felt his lips kiss mine and then move to my cheek.
Marcus slid off of me and lay next to me; his fingers traced the curves of my body as I continued to feel the aftershock of orgasms flow through me. I tried to keep looking at him, but my eyes were getting tired.
I felt his arms wrap around me, and it was the safest I had felt in weeks. I felt myself drift off to sleep. This time, I was not concerned at all about Marcus. My body was exhausted and needed sleep desperately.
Chapter 23
I don’t know how long I slept, but when I woke up, I went downstairs to find Marcus making breakfast and all the other guys were gone. The house was very quiet, especially since the guys had left and it was only Marcus and I. When I had first arrived, I didn’t think it was a working bed and breakfast, but as I watched Marcus in the kitchen, I thought that perhaps it was an operating business.
The feeling that we were lovers on a secluded vacation to this old bed and breakfast was wonderful. I smiled as I took in the scene of Marcus cooking and the beautiful summer day through the windows.
“Good morning, beautiful,” Marcus said as he flipped pancakes.
He wore only a pair of jeans, and they fit every muscular curve he had. I could stand and look at the muscles of his stomach forever. He didn’t have a six-pack; instead, it was more like an eight-pack. Each group of muscles genetically perfect and like they had been drawn onto his body by an artist.
“Morning Marcus,” I said as I sat at the table.
I continued to watch him work the kitchen like he knew exactly what he was doing. It was sexy as hell to see a man who knew his way around the kitchen. His hands worked quickly from one task to the next as he mixed the pancake batter, cut up strawberries, and poured orange juice.
He was certainly very good with his hands—that I knew from experience.
“Did you sleep well?” he asked.
“God, yes, I felt like I slept for a week,” I said.
Marcus brought over a couple plates full of food and then some orange juice. We both sat there and ate in silence. I couldn’t remember how long it had been since I had eaten. Maybe two days before when I was at Willow and Marv’s house? I shoveled in the pancakes and strawberries like a prisoner who had been denied food for weeks.
It surprised me how comfortable I felt with Marcus and his new beard. It looked good on him now that he was all cleaned up. I think he might have trimmed it at some point while I was asleep also. The curves of his beard matched perfectly with the edges of his chiseled jawline.
He sat there eating his food and every now and then glanced at me and smiled. It was a reassuring smile that I needed so very much. I still didn’t know what was going on, and although I was freaked out about it on the inside, I did try not to worry too much about it. I was there with Marcus now; nothing could go wrong with him there.
I saw the wound on his shoulder from the gunshot he had taken a few weeks before. It was all healed now with a raised red scar that had formed. My fingers traced over the scar, and I looked up at him.
I could still remember the day that he was shot with such vivid clarity. I still remembered seeing his partners carrying him out of his house and thinking that he was dead. I remembered shouting out to him and getting no response at all. The horror of that night was very fresh in my brain, and I doubted I would forget about it anytime soon.
“Does it still hurt?” I asked.
“No, it’s better.”
“Should I call Willow and Marv? I know they must be getting freaked out.”
“I called Sheriff Thomson and told him you were with me; he’ll let them know.”
Marcus handled things very efficiently. The fact that he knew who Sheriff Thomson was impressed me a great deal. Marcus was a smart man and seemed to think things through about ten steps ahead of everyone else. I couldn’t even imagine being able to think about steps that were so far ahead of the moment I was in.
“Okay, that’s good. I just didn’t want them to worry. How long are we going to stay here? Can I call Stanley and Rob?” I asked.
“Well, I would like it if you stayed here. But I have to go back to work for a little bit. And I called Stanley and asked him to let Rob know what was going on, I hope that is okay?”
“Yes, that’s fine. But why are you going back to work? Aren’t you done yet?”
“Not done yet,” he replied.
Panic struck my whole body as I thought about being left alone in the house. I knew we were far away from where the men had hurt Marcus, but I didn’t like the thought of being left without any protection.
“Will Zed be with me? Or one of the other guys?”
“No, they need to come with me on this mission. You will be alright. No one knows we are here except the owners of the property.”
“I won’t be safe,” I said as my voice cracked.
“You will be safe. I wouldn’t leave you here if I didn’t think you would be alright.”
I felt my breath get faster as I started to panic. I couldn’t be left alone; there was just no way that I would be alright.
“I’ll just come with you. Where are you going?”
“Babe, you can’t come with me. I’m going to be down in Chicago messing up some pretty bad guys. You need to stay here.”
Panic filled my body, and I felt my breath getting faster and faster. The color left my face, and I felt it drained all of the normal skin tone from my whole body. I was left with a pale face that felt like I was about to pass out. The room was closing in on me, and I felt extremely dizzy.
“I can’t stay alone,” I said as my hand shook.
Marcus grabbed both of my hands and held them firm in his hands.
He looked me in the eyes, and I felt he was there with me. He didn’t condemn me for being scared; instead, he understood and that helped me calm down.
“I’ll give you a gun if you would like?”
I thought about it for a moment. I had never shot a gun before, but the idea of having one around did make me feel a little better.
“Will you show me how to use it?”
“Of course, after breakfast we can go out back, and I will show you. But I should only be gone for a day or two; you will be just fine. I promise.”
I couldn’t eat another bite of my breakfast, and instead waited for him to eat so he could show me how to shoot the gun. It made me feel much better to think I could at least protect myself if I had to, which, of course, I hoped I wouldn’t have to do. I had never been around guns and didn’t feel comfortable at all with the idea of having to fire one. But it was much better to be able to shoot the bad guys than to let them shoot me.
The cold metal of his gun felt sexy in my hands. I held the heavy gun and tried to point it at the target Marcus had set up for me on the other end of the yard. The weight of the gun made it difficult to keep my hands outstretched, though. My muscles just were not used to having to work that hard.
I relaxed my arms and the gun pointed toward the ground. It was silver, and I really didn’t know what type of gun it was. It was flat on the sides and had a slip of bullets that slid into the bottom of the gun. I wanted to know how to shoot it. I wanted to feel safe when Marcus was gone and feel like I could protect myself if I had to.
Marcus came over and showed me how to put the safety back on the gun.
“Anytime it is not in use, you have to have the safety on. This is essential. Do not forget it.”
The serious nature of his voice told me that it indeed was essential, and I would do my best to not forget about it. I hated guns, and never in my life would I have thought I would want to learn how to fire one. But there were a lot of things in my life that had changed in the previous weeks, so firing a gun wasn’t all that surprising.
It was a novelty to have a gun in my hand, but I didn’t like the responsibility that would come if I fired it. It would mean I could potentially take someone’s life. Obviously, I would only do that if it was someone who tried to take my life. But I didn’t have a lot of confidence in my abilities, and I still felt that the possibility of hurting someone who was innocent was always there. That was a really big deal and not something I took lightly. I doubted I would ever be able to actually fire the weapon, but it did make me feel better to know how to use it, just in case.
We remained in the backyard for a couple hours, and I tried repeatedly to shoot the gun and hit the target, without any luck. It was just too hard to hold the gun up and aim. I needed much more practice. I probably also needed to work out a little more.
My life consisted of working on my old house and taking pictures. I didn’t go to the gym, and I certainly didn’t spend any time lifting weights or working out in the traditional sense. Of course, I got exercise when I walked around and took pictures as well as all the things I did around my house as I remodeled it. But it certainly hadn’t provided me with large muscles.
“I’m never going to be able to shoot this thing,” I said out of frustration.
“Trust me; the moment you need to shoot this thing, you will know how to shoot it.”
He grabbed the gun from me, put the safety on it, and sat it on the table. Then he pulled me to him and let his lips crush down onto mine. He felt like home. When his arms wrapped around me, it felt like exactly where I was supposed to be.
I hesitate to think this, but I felt more comfortable with Marcus than I ever had with Michael. Perhaps it was because I was older and more comfortable with myself. Or maybe we were just a better fit, but for whatever reason, I really felt like myself when I was around Marcus. I felt like I could be the best person I wanted to be, and he would be right there beside me.
It wasn’t just the strength of his arms and his muscles that made me feel safe, it was him. It was Marcus and the way he totally and utterly devoted himself to me when I was there with him. He wanted me to feel safe; he wanted me to feel like I could handle being left alone for a couple days. I could tell that he cared about me and genuinely wanted me to be safe. That feeling was intense and drew me closer to him.
Our mouths continued to play as we explored the depths of each other. His strong hands moved lightly up and down my body and sent shivers of delight through my skin. God, it felt so good to have his hands on my body.
His fingers moved under my shirt, and I wiggled with delight as they touched my bare back. They moved up and down my back, and he pulled me in close to him. The intensity of his touch made me weak in the knees. Even after being together for several weeks, his touch was still so intense that I got wet right away. I wanted him; I always wanted him. Even when I was angry with him, I wanted him. There was no way around it.
I let my own hands move under his shirt and felt the goose bumps on his back. It made me happy to see that my touch also affected him the way his affected me. He was a quiet man and kept his feelings to himself, but his body reaction was always something he couldn’t control when he was around me. I liked that. I liked being able to see his body react to my body. It was so inspiring.
When his body reacted to mine, it made me want more. I wanted to see what else I could do to his body.
He must have thought the same thing because he unbuckled my shorts and let them fall to the ground. We were out in the backyard still, and I looked around to make sure there was no one nearby.
The bed and breakfast was far into the countryside, and there wasn’t a house for several miles. Although, occasionally a car did drive by the road in front of the house. I didn’t know why I was so afraid of someone seeing us; there was obviously no one around for miles and miles.
Then he moved my pink lace panties to the ground. His hand gently caressed my ass, and he turned me around to face the picnic table. He pressed my head down toward the table, and I felt him pull his cock out of his jeans after he lowered them to his knees. My ass lay bare and exposed to the light of the warm summer day.
I lay there in anticipation as his fingers played with me to ensure I was properly excited and ready for him. The excitement of the moment built up inside of me. I had never been outside like this when I had sex. It was intense and full of anticipation.
His cock entered me, and I let out a breath of excitement. I took another deep breath and felt him as he filled me up. His body fit perfectly with mine, and we moved in time with each other. Each thrust made him harder, and each thrust got me more and more excited.
I had never had sex outside, and the cool breeze against my body set every nerve on edge. My nipples hardened with the feel of the hard wood of the picnic table underneath them. It was rough and old and in total contrast to my smooth skin. My body relished all the new feelings as we moved together toward a climax.
Each new thrust was more intense than the last. I felt my knees get weak, and I was glad there was a table under me to hold me up. There was no way I could have stood of my own free will at that moment. My leg strength was not there, and I had nothing in reserve to keep me from tumbling to the ground.
Marcus held my hips with his hands, and I felt his release, and he exploded inside of me. He then reached around and moved his thumb against my clit in a pulsing motion and continued to thrust inside of me. His cock stayed hard until I finally exploded with my own orgasm. It was intense and different than any I’d had before. This time I felt satisfaction that moved throughout my entire body. I felt released from tensions I didn’t even know I had.
“Well, that was fun,” I said as Marcus turned me toward him and kissed me.
I still didn’t feel comfortable with him leaving me there, but I knew that he wouldn’t do anything that was going to put me in danger. So if he felt I could be safe, then I had to trust that I would be safe.
He packed up an old t
ruck with some things that he wanted to take with him, and I stood there and watched him. It didn’t seem real that he was going to let me stay there alone. After all the work he had gone to in bringing me to the bed and breakfast and making sure I was safe, I still didn’t understand how he could feel I would be safe there all alone.
“I’ll be back in two days. There is nothing to worry about,” Marcus said.
“Famous last words,” I said with a smile.
“Seriously, relax. Take some time to enjoy this place. Sleep in, moisturize your hair, or whatever else you ladies like to do when you are alone.”
Marcus tried to make light of the situation, but I just couldn’t go there yet. I was scared, and I knew he could tell. There was nothing he could say or do that would make me feel safe alone at this place. But I knew he had to leave. The situation was intense with him and whoever he worked with in Chicago. I knew it was getting close to being over, and I longed for the day that we could comfortably cuddle in my house again.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him. I needed to feel his body next to mine for just a little longer. I needed to feel that things would be alright. I felt safe next to Marcus. I felt safe with him just being in the same house. I wasn’t ready for him to leave. I wasn’t ready for the uncertainty of being alone.
He held me tight and didn’t let go. I couldn’t tell if he was nervous about where he was going off to or if he just wanted me to feel more comfortable. It felt nice to have his arms around me, though. I felt safe at that moment.
Marcus kissed me and then got into his truck. He grabbed my hand and held onto it, pulled it up to his lips, and kissed it again. His lips felt warm and soft and were still surrounded by the roughness of his beard.
I watched as his truck pulled out of the driveway and turned down the old dirt road. It went on for miles, and I stood at the end of the driveway and watched him until I couldn’t see anything more than a speck in the distance.
Damaged Love Page 35