* * *
It was my first day back at the office. Needless to say, I knew a lot of work was waiting for me. I arrived earlier than anyone so that I could get a head start on the workload. I stepped off the elevator and walked to the office that was on the west wing. I unarmed the alarm and walked into the office and was surprised to see the receptionist was already at her desk. Any other time, I would’ve flirted, but considering everything that had happened, I decided to lay off.
“Good morning, Boss Man,” she said and smiled at me.
“Good morning, my dear Shari.” I kept it brief.
I was about to open up my office door when Leon stepped out of his office. “Aye, Hass, let me talk with you real quickly.”
“I didn’t even know you were here this early, my man.” I followed him into his office. “Is everything a’ight, man? You don’t look too pleased.”
“Sit down, Hassan. I’ve been up all night, trying to find the words to say to you, and there’s no easy way to say it.”
“Say what?”
“Hassan, I think you need to give up your partnership at the firm. This case you got going on is not only shedding a negative light on you, but it’s also shedding a negative light on the firm, on me, and our clients.”
“What the fuck are you saying to me, my nigga? This firm is mine. I built it with my paper and my sweat. What gives you the power to tell me you want me to give up my partnership? I’m the motherfucking boss in here. Don’t you know that? I’m the reason why you’re eating so well,” I yelled at this nigga.
“You need to calm down. You’re not thinking about the future of this company. You’ve been arrested for first-degree assault on a female. It’s not a good look for the company. Imagine when the word gets out that you were arrested for beating up your girlfriend. The press is going to have a field day with us.”
“Leon, I guess you didn’t hear me the first time. This is my company, and I am not leaving it—plain and simple. You hear me? Now, you can take your ass and get the fuck out of my shit.”
“You know you can be a real asshole sometimes. I warned you about that chick, but, no, you didn’t care. Now, look at you. You’re about to lose everything over a chick that’s not even worth it. I don’t know what’s going on with you, but I think you need to get it together—fast. Look around you. You’re losing everything you once loved. You’re sinking fast, and I refuse to sink with you. Now, please, excuse me. I need to find me a new firm. Also, your wife has an interest in the company, so I’ll see how she feels about it.”
I stood there looking at this nigga with fire in my eyes. All I saw was jealousy and envy. I knew he wanted my position, but it was fucked up that he was trying to kick a nigga while he was down.
“You know what? You’re one jealous motherfucker. You want my life and my position here at the firm.”
“Hassan, let’s be real. You don’t have too much of a life. You run around here like you the man, but, bro, you look like a damn fool. You have a good woman, but you fucked it up for a hood bitch. Didn’t you know once you started making money, you needed to stop fucking them broke bitches? But let you tell it, you got all the fucking sense in the world. Ha-ha, you can have that shit, bro. We’re done here.”
I didn’t respond. Instead, I walked out and into my office. This nigga done bumped his head somewhere... either that, or he was a plain ole fool. This is my company, not his, and definitely not that bitch Destiny’s. This was my idea, and I busted my ass for years, building it from scratch. I will not walk away from it, and no one else will reap the benefits.
I sat at my desk, listening to the messages from clients. I could barely concentrate on the task at hand. That nigga really had rubbed me the wrong way. I should’ve punched him in the mouth when he brought up that dumb shit. That nigga had no idea who I am.
My cell phone started ringing. I looked at the caller ID and saw it was Big Dre.
“What the fuck is this nigga calling me for?”
“Hello. I thought you wasn’t going to call me on the phone.”
“Shit, nigga, fuck all that. I’ve been trying to call yo’ ass for days now.”
“Well, I couldn’t answer the phone. I was busy.”
“Busy? Nigga, did you see the motherfucking news?” he yelled.
“News? Why would I need to see the news?” My anxiety level skyrocketed.
What the fuck is this nigga talking about? I thought.
“Nigga, you know what the fuck I’m talking about.”
“No, I don’t know. As a matter of fact, if you need an attorney, I’m willing to be your attorney, Mr. Brooks.”
“What the fuck! You acting like you ain’t hired me to off that nigga. Now you acting brand-new and shit. I’m telling you, pussy, if I go down, you going with me. I’m pretty sure there’s a district attorney that would love to give me a deal if I gave him a bigger fish to fry.”
That statement got my attention fast. This old fake-ass thug was talking about snitching on me. I tell you about these streets niggas that claim they go hard, but all it takes is a charge, and they’d start singing like a bird.
“Yo, what do you want from me?” I said in an aggressive tone.
“Shit, it’s hot right now, and I need to be ghost. I need fifty grand by the end of the week.”
“What the fuck! I ain’t got that kind of money lying around.”
“Maybe not, but I know you got it somewhere. Shit, you might need to hit that wife of yours. She’s got a few coins,” he chuckled.
“We’re getting a divorce.”
“Listen up, fuck nigga. I ’ont give a fuck where you get it from. You have until Friday evening to get it to me.” Then he hung up.
“Fuck,” I whispered as I rubbed my hand over my face.
I couldn’t believe that this fuck nigga was blackmailing me. Where the fuck does he expect me to get fifty grand from without raising an alarm? I was also curious to find out what he was talking about. What was on the news that had him so spooked? God, I prayed my name wasn’t mixed up in this shit. I couldn’t go to prison—I just couldn’t.
Chapter Seven
Destiny Clarke
The first night that I spent with Spencer was peaceful. He took me to his home. At first, I was a little reluctant because I really didn’t know too much about him. For all I knew, he could be a rapist. It was late, and I was tired from everything that had happened earlier. I was still shocked that Hassan popped up at the house like that.
I took a quick shower and changed into my pajamas. Then I lay in the bed beside him, inhaling his masculine scent, which made me gasp for air. It’s been awhile since I was this close to a man, one that I was attracted to, physically and mentally. I relaxed as he lay behind me with his arms wrapped around me. I lay there thinking of how great it felt, wondering if this could possibly mean happiness. Neither of us spoke. Then I peacefully dozed off....
* * *
Spencer dropped me off at my house in the morning. Hassan was gone, which was great. I had such a great night and didn’t want to deal with his bullshit. I thought back on last night, and it was perfect, even though sex wasn’t involved. The mental part of it was all I needed.
Spencer and my relationship grew stronger over the next couple of weeks. I still hadn’t slept with him, and he didn’t pursue me on that level, even though we slept in the same bed on the weekends when Amaiya was at my mother’s house.
I ain’t going to lie. I was ready to feel him inside of me. At first, I didn’t want to rush into anything. But fuck Hassan. The truth is, he wasn’t worried about me when he was fucking them bitches, so why the fuck I should worry about his ass? Just because he’s a man doesn’t mean he can get away with dogging me out. I wish he had walked in on Spencer digging my guts out. I would’ve loved to see his face.
One evening after dinner, Spencer and I went back to his house. We were sitting on the couch, drinking and talking. He leaned in and started kissing me. He began rubbing my legs. Th
en his hand slowly traveled up my dress. My body trembled as he found his way between my legs. I wanted him badly. Fuck that—I wanted him now. He pulled my underwear aside and gently massaged my clit. My pussy was already moist and ready for him to slide in. He eased up off the couch and kneeled in front of me. I knew exactly what he was about to do....
“Stop! You can’t do that,” I blurted out.
“Baby, I want to. You want me to. Let me please you like I know I can,” he pleaded.
“It’s not that. I d-o, do want you,” I stuttered.
“So, what’s the problem?”
I took his hands in mine, and then I spoke. “I don’t want to scare you away, but I have herpes....” I held my breath after the words left my mouth.
“You’re joking. You’re just trying to scare me off,” he laughed.
“Seriously, A few months ago, I found out I had it. Hassan infected me.”
There was a long pause between us. . . .
He squeezed my hand. “Babe, I’m so sorry. Man, I want to kill that nigga for all the shit he put you through. Man, oh man.” He shook his head.
My heart was racing because I didn’t know if he was going to break it off with me. I knew that this was a chance I was taking, but I didn’t have a choice. There was no way I was going to infect him or put his health at risk.
“Babe, get out of your thoughts. I know you’re wondering if I’m going to leave you. Hell no, I’m a grown man, and you’re the woman that I want. There is nothing or no one that can get in the way of that. I ’ont know too much about herpes, but I guess there are ways to get around it. We’re goin’ figure it out together. I want you, Destiny, not just physically, but mentally.”
I wiped away the tears as this man spoke from his heart. Just when I thought I was damaged goods because I had an STD that couldn’t be cured, this man was willing to accept me.
“Dry them tears. You’re a beautiful person inside out, and I can only hope you will give me the chance to treat you like you deserve.”
I couldn’t find the words to say anything, so I remained quiet and just let the tears flow.
That night after we got all the emotional stuff out of the way, Spencer carried me upstairs. He slowly stripped off my clothes. I watched as he took off his clothes. My eyes popped open when I saw the little six-inch cock he pulled out.
Lord, what is he going to do with that little thing? I thought. It was even worse when I saw him pull out a Magnum condom. I thought Magnums were made for big cocks. I couldn’t say another word. I just lay there.
I closed my eyes as he massaged my breasts. His touch made my body tremble. I wanted him. I had no idea why, but I did. I was wet and bothered and wanted to be fucked. I was nervous because I didn’t know how it was going to work out with his little size. He spread my legs apart and slid his erect cock inside my hungry pussy.
“Oh-oh,” I groaned out in ecstasy.
He slowly slid in and worked the middle like a pro. In that instance, the size didn’t matter. He pounded my walls as I dug my fingernails into his back. I had multiple orgasms back-to-back. I felt like my brain was coming out of my head the way juice was spilling out of me.
“Aargh, aargh, aaaargh,” he groaned as he busted.
I couldn’t move. I felt like all my energy had evaporated from my body. I lay there for a few minutes, thinking. I actually enjoyed this. He made love to my mind and my body, and I loved every second of it. This was something that I could get used to, but, first, I needed to divorce that bum-ass nigga. Just the thought of him dimmed my happiness for a brief moment. I quickly snapped out of that foul mood and focused on the happy times that were ahead of me. I just hoped this was real, not that fake-ass love shit. You know how dudes are usually the sweetest when they want to fuck, but they quickly have amnesia after they get you right where they need you to be....
I took a quick shower, put on some lotion, and got back into bed. I rubbed his chest as I rested my head on him. Whatever this was, I wanted to take my time so it could last were my thoughts before I dozed off.
Imani Gibson
I was happy the weekend was over. Today was Corey’s funeral, and even though we didn’t end on good terms, I still wanted to pay my respects. I got up and walked to Josiah’s room and peeped in on him. He was lying on his bed, playing on his phone. I knocked on the door before I pushed it open.
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” I said as I sat on the edge of his bed.
“What’s up?” He looked at me like I had interrupted him.
“Well, I know that I haven’t always been the best mom to you, but I did my best and made sure you never went without. What I’m trying to tell you is that my decisions were not always the best, but as your mother, I had to make moves so we could be all right.”
I paused.... I had to gather my thoughts.
“Ma, get it over wit’. All this sentimental stuff I ain’t tryin’a hear all that,” he said.
It took me by surprise. Why was Josiah acting like this?
“Boy, what I’m trying to say is that I’m sorry I lied to you about who your father is. I only wanted what’s best for you. The truth is that Corey was your real father, and he got killed the other day.”
“You lied to me because you’re a fucking whore. You didn’t do shit for me. You did it because you wanted to hold on to that bum-ass nigga. Now, you’re telling me that my real father is dead. So, I’ll never get a chance to talk to him or bond with him, because your dumb ass lied. I fucking hate you. I wish you wasn’t my mom.”
I sat there frozen as the words that came out of my son’s mouth pierced my soul. How could he say these things to me? I gave him life. Everything I did, I did for him. Tears filled my eyes and eventually flooded my face.
I reached over to touch him. I wanted to let him know that I was sorry. Sorry for robbing him of the chance to meet his father. Now, it will never happen.
“B-babyyyy—”
“Don’t touch me. You know when I was young, I looked up to you. You was everything to me, but now, I see that all that shit was a fantasy. You messing wit’ that woman’s husband, and you letting that nigga beat on you, and you still fuck with him. I swear, I can’t wait until I’m eighteen. I’m going to move far away from you.”
I continued crying. I tried to talk, but the words wouldn’t come out. After a moment, I got myself together, and then I spoke.
“First of all, you not goin’ be up in my shit disrespecting me. Regardless of what you might think, I am still your fucking mother. And for the record, Hassan was my man before that bitch got her paws on him. So, before you start speaking on some shit that you have no idea about, get your fucking facts straight,” I spat.
He stood up and stepped toward me. “Are you saying you want me out? Just say the word, Mother.”
I slapped him in the face. “Don’t you fucking try me, little boy.”
“Bitch, that’s the last time you will put your hands on me ever, I swear.” He stormed out of the room and walked out the front door, slamming it behind him.
“Noooo,” I dropped to my knees and screamed out.
Within a couple of months, I lost everything in my life. First, Hassan, then my unborn child, and now Josiah. He was all I had left. I got up and ran to the door to see if he was outside, but he was gone. My baby was gone.
* * *
After the incident with Josiah, I didn’t feel like going to Corey’s funeral. I had to push myself, though. At one point, we were cool, and this was the last time I would ever see him. I bought myself a nice black dress with some heels. I knew I had to be on my A-game because Corey’s other hoes might be there. I knew news traveled fast, so the fact that we had a baby together was public information.
I walked into the packed church and felt all eyes on me. I took a deep breath and continued walking up to the front so that I could take one last look at him. I don’t know why my eyes filled with tears as I stared at the dark, swollen figure in the casket. He had little or n
o resemblance to the Corey I knew. I figured the bullets from the gunshots did him like that. I wiped my eyes, turned, and walked away.
Throughout the entire service, you could hear screams, especially when the pastor was telling all those lies about “how great of a man he was.” Don’t get me wrong. I don’t think he was a bad dude, but he was far from the great person they were painting him to be. I couldn’t take any more of this, so I got up to leave. I tiptoed out with my head hung down low until I reached the front of the church.
“I have no idea why you would show your face up in here. You ain’t welcome.”
I lifted my head and noticed Corey’s dumb-ass sister, blocking my path.
“Listen, bitch, I came to show my respect to a friend. You need to chill out. You wouldn’t want to create a scene at your brother’s funeral.”
“You know what? You put my brother through so much shit—even on his deathbed. You have no shame to come up in here. You are not welcome here, so get the fuck out. I regret that my brother didn’t live longer, so he could find out that you wasn’t nothing but a whore.”
“You silly bitch, I ain’t did shit to him. I gave him some pussy, and he fell in love. Shit, I heard you on females. I promise, if I gave you this good pussy, you’d be sprung too. Now, let me get out of here before I show my ass.”
“You nasty ho. You fucked my brother and his boy, and just so you know, yes, I like clean bitches. Not a thirsty-ass ho like you. Now get yo’ ass on before I get you thrown out.” She walked back into the crowd.
I was furious that this bitch felt like she had the right to speak on some shit that she had no idea about.
“Rest in peace, Corey,” I mumbled, then walked down the steps and out into the pouring rain. I didn’t run for shelter, nor did I care about my newly sown in Malaysian weave. I took off my heels and walked slowly in the rain as it pounded down on my head. My tears mingled with the raindrops. I had no idea what I was crying about. I just knew that I was tired of all the shit that was going on in my life. I was ready to start over.
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