by Joanne Rock
He rolled on a condom he produced from underneath the cast-iron lantern, obviously hidden there ahead of time. Nina’s eyes burned at his thoughtfulness even though it reminded her how careful he’d always been about...that.
Chasing the idea away before it stole the moment from her, she arched up to kiss him so that their mouths met an instant before he eased inside her. She cried out with pleasure at the feel of him, her fingernails gently clutching at his shoulders, holding him closer. Closer.
The friction of his chest against her breasts caused another little sensual storm inside her, a pleasurable stroking that mirrored the rest of what was going on between them. Tension coiled tight in her again. She traced the muscles of his back with her palms, sliding her hands down to the bottom of his spine and out to his hips.
With the next thrust, she held him there, deep inside her. She rocked her hips against his, quick, tight movements of her own that made sweat pop along his brow. She could see it glisten in the lantern light, could smell the scent of him mingling with the fragrant hay.
When his release came, he thrust hard again, over and over. He anchored her to him with one arm, squeezing her tight to him while his heart slugged a relentless beat. It echoed her own heartbeat and she focused on that, knowing how much this connection cost him, too. And that’s what put her over the edge for the second time.
Feeling what she did to him, knowing that he was as helpless in the face of it as she was, shred every wall she’d ever built against him. Her body convulsed around his until she was breathless and spent, her skin flushed with heat.
For long moments, she couldn’t think. Couldn’t speak. She snuggled against Mack’s chest, loving this closeness almost as much as she loved him. She knew she loved him now. Maybe she’d never stopped. That was probably why her other relationships hadn’t lasted. Why the couple of guys she’d tried to date were never The One. She’d never stopped loving Mack.
She closed her eyes against the knowledge, not ready for it. Even if she could find a way to have a future with Mack, they weren’t there yet. Too much uncertainty lingered between them. And she was no longer that impulsive teen who jumped into life with both feet. For now, they had tonight. That was enough.
“Nina?” he said finally, long minutes afterward.
“Mmm?” She kissed his shoulder, wishing they could fall asleep right here, under the stars. She was incredibly comfortable. More relaxed than she’d felt in a long time.
“I wanted to have the first dance with you.” He propped himself on his elbow, staring down at her where she lay. “Will you save me the last one, too? It’s...part of my plan.”
She forced herself to really focus on him. To think about what he was saying.
“You’re putting a lot of effort into my surprises this weekend.” She wondered what it was leading up to.
“I have meetings I need to attend on Monday back in Nashville. A life I have to return to. But I want to talk to you before I go.”
Why couldn’t they talk now? She wasn’t sure if she was excited about this new surprise or scared.
“I don’t think I’ll be ready for the weekend to end.” That wasn’t the same as saying she loved him. But she was showing her hand a little.
“Me, either.” He cupped her shoulder and rubbed his thumb over her collarbone. “I’m just hoping it’s not too late to figure out a way to be together.”
Which told her past this weekend, he didn’t have any more of a plan than she did. Closing her eyes to hide the hurt that he hadn’t changed his mind about building a real life with her, one that included at least the possibility of a family, Nina went back to memorizing every beautiful moment of the time they had left.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
BY SATURDAY EVENING, all of Heartache agreed the Harvest Festival had been a huge success so far.
Mack received pats on the back. Praise from the committee, from Scott, and even his mother who’d put in an appearance about an hour ago on the arm of Erin, Mack’s oldest sister. Erin had been in Louisville for the past few months with her new artist boyfriend, but she’d made the trip to show family support. Knowing their mother’s tendency to be overwhelmed by a crowd, Erin had found Nina’s grandmother, Daisy Spencer, in a corner of the outdoor picnic area near a few rented space heaters, and together they listened to the cover band that Mack had brought down from Nashville.
The imported band had agreed to a few warm-up songs outdoors while the interior of the dining hall was transformed for the Harvest Dance. In past years, the crowd would be thin right now, with the food vendors shutting down and the exhibitors talking to a few last potential customers. But the weather had been clear and mild and the festival had been bigger than ever.
Even now, kids ran around with pumpkins from Harlan Brady’s booth, the nearby tables full of markers, stickers and paints for decorating. Other kids bobbed for apples in the tin buckets scattered around the lawn nearby. Some painted dipped gourds in glitter paint and snacked on the last of the caramel fried apples that Nina’s helpers had made all day for two days straight. The things were addictive.
Nina had been embraced by the town as one of their own. The hurts and rumors of eight years ago were gone and everyone from the owner of Lucky’s to the hairdressers at the salon where Ally worked were begging Nina to open a bakery. Or a restaurant. Even a coffee shop would do, they all agreed. Nina had spent some time speaking privately to his mother, as well, a conversation he’d noticed had ended with a quick embrace.
Mack should be happy for her as she accepted yet another effusive compliment...this one from his sister Erin, as Nina rejoined their little group. And he was, damn it. He just felt her slipping away from him a little more each time someone told her she belonged here. That her roots were in Heartache, Tennessee.
She picked up paper napkins and leftover cups from the kids’ tables even though she’d already changed clothes for the dance. Wearing a full pink skirt with red ballet flats and a red belt, she looked so beautiful his heart hurt. She had on her jean jacket while she worked outside and he couldn’t help but remember how she’d slid it off two nights before in the back of the hay wagon.
“Thank you so much,” she said to Erin, pitching the napkins into a nearby trash bin and admiring a child’s decorated gourd. “I’ve been creatively renewed since coming back here.” Mack sat on a nearby bench and she slid onto the seat beside him. Close but not touching.
Because she didn’t want to declare a formal relationship between them yet? Or because she was already distancing herself from him? Tension strung him tight as a bow. He needed to head home tomorrow after two weeks away from the bar and he still didn’t know where he stood with Nina.
“I’m glad to hear that, Nina.” Mack’s mother straightened in her seat, sitting forward in one of the cushioned chairs Mack had dragged outside for her and Mrs. Spencer. “I wanted to apologize for missing you when you and Daisy came by. I have up days and down days, you know. But the peach pie was a dose of the best kind of old-fashioned medicine.”
Mack hadn’t realized he was holding his breath until his mother finished speaking and he was able to relax. She seemed level tonight. In fact, now that Mack was paying better attention and not letting old biases sway his view of his mother, he noticed the changes in her. Or, at least, she seemed to have an increased sense of control over the challenges she faced.
“Gram’s baking inspired my whole career.” Nina winked at her grandmother before turning back to Mack’s mom. “And I’m glad you were feeling well enough to come today. It must be nice for you to enjoy what your whole family has worked so hard to build.”
Mack’s mother nodded. Smiled. “This was one of Mr. Finley’s better ideas.”
“And even Ally played a part this year!” Mrs. Spencer added, clapping her hands lightly in time to the music still playing nearby. “Her maz
e looks like a fortress. I’m sure I never would have found my way out if I’d gone in.”
Nina’s grandmother wore a painted macaroni necklace that one of the kids must have made her. It occurred to him that she’d passed on her love of children to Nina, even though it had somehow skipped a generation with Nina’s dad. He’d checked out on family life just a decade after having his only child.
Proving you could be a crap father even if life handed you every tool you needed. Also proving genetics weren’t everything. Logically, Mack understood that. But it didn’t make him any more comfortable taking those risks with a child who had no say in their DNA baggage.
“You have a lot to be proud of, Mack,” Nina observed quietly while Harlan Brady joined the women and regaled them with a story about a little girl intent on choosing a pumpkin the same size as her at his farm booth earlier. “The festival has been a huge success.”
“I’d trade the success to heal Scott and Bethany’s marriage.” His brother was sitting off to one side with some guys who worked on the construction side of the Finley business. Nursing a beer, he didn’t look like he had much to say and he sure as hell didn’t seem to be having fun. “I can’t believe he’s going to just let it all fall apart.”
Bethany, on the other hand, had been visible all day, helping out with the food prep and collecting money at the concession counters. Even now, she flitted among the tables assuring people the dining hall was almost decorated and the Harvest Dance would start soon. Ally and Ethan were nearby, hanging a lighted swag of fall leaves around the doors to the dining hall.
Ally looked pretty in a long yellow skirt with what appeared to be one of Ethan’s flannel shirts around her shoulders while they worked outside.
“I think happily-ever-afters are a lot more work than some people realize.” Nina straightened one of the table decorations, a corn husk scarecrow seated on the edge of a planter of mums. Then she slid off the bench to stand. “I’d better get inside and make sure we’ve got the dance refreshments all set. The band is amazing, by the way, Mack. Your bar is going to get a reputation for being a real gateway for up-and-coming acts.”
“They’ve got a lot of talent,” he agreed. He’d been angling for that kind of reputation in Nashville ever since opening Finleys’. He ought to be happy that Nina recognized it right away. Except that goal felt a little hollow now as the bigger prize was slipping through his fingers. “Do you need any help?”
“I should be fine, but thanks.” She gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze that turned him inside out. All the more because he knew it was no more than she’d give to any other friend. “I’m looking forward to our dance.”
For a moment, he could see the sadness in her gray eyes. And the hurt that he’d put there.
She knew as well as he did they weren’t going to be able to overcome the last barrier that separated them. His unwillingness to compromise on having kids had already cost him his first wife. Now, he was breaking Nina’s heart, too, when she’d warned him that she couldn’t afford that kind of pain again.
He wanted to say something—anything—to put off the inevitable. Or change her mind. Or...
Hell, he didn’t even know anymore.
But before he could say anything she walked away to admire Ally and Ethan’s decorating before entering the dining hall. Leaving him with the weight of failure on his shoulders once again and a need deep in his gut to figure out a solution.
* * *
“WANT SOME HELP, NINA?” A feminine voice asked from behind her as Nina strode through the dining hall toward the kitchen.
While volunteers dragged tables into a new configuration and decorated the corners with hay bales and mums, Nina’s heart was in pieces. Absolute, tiny pieces. All she wanted to do was find a quiet place to cry for an hour or two before making an appearance at this dance that the rest of Heartache was so excited about. But she couldn’t ignore the kindness in the voice behind her.
The voice of Mack’s niece.
“Thanks, Ally.” She couldn’t hold back the smallest sniffle as she blinked a few times. Waiting for Ally to catch up, she laid an arm on the girl’s shoulders. “Have I mentioned how much I appreciate you bringing Gram to the salon with you on her hair appointment days?”
“Oh, sure.” Ally waved away the thanks. “Totally no trouble. Mrs. Spencer is everyone’s favorite customer. She keeps us laughing all day when she’s there.”
Nina guided her past some workers stringing yellow and orange lights overhead until the roof was a canopy of bright harvest colors. Retreating into a corner near a refreshment table, she gestured toward a folded tablecloth.
“If you want to put on the linens, I’ll check how the mulled cider is coming along.” Nina had been inspired by the spiced brew Mack had brought her that night they’d watched the color guard team practice on the football field. The hot drink would be perfect for the dance.
“Sure.” Ally shook out the white cotton cloth while Nina opened the top of the electric carafe on a serving tray nearby. “Can I ask you something, like, personal?”
More than ready to think about anything besides Mack and the fact that he was leaving town tomorrow—maybe even tonight—Nina nodded. “Of course. I’m hoping we’ll get to see more of each other now that I’m staying in Heartache.”
Ally evened up the hems of the cloth on either side of the table. “You left town when you were eighteen, right? Wasn’t that a really good thing for you? You opened a business, left the smalltown stuff behind...I mean, it was fun, right?”
Caught off guard and wanting to say the right things, Nina took a moment. Gathered her thoughts. She set the lid back on the carafe while a new band warmed up on a stage across the hall.
“I left under very unhappy circumstances.” She swallowed hard, being honest. “It was actually very painful even though I’d always wanted to leave. Looking back, I wish—more than anything—I’d stayed long enough to work out my problems here. Then, I could have moved on with a clear conscience.”
Ally gave up all pretense of helping, taking a seat on a folding chair against the wall beneath a pass-through window to the kitchen. Her yellow skirt puffed out with the movement.
“I hate it here, even though today has actually been really great.” Ally glanced around the dance hall, her eye lingering on the lights overhead. “But I’m crazy about Ethan and he doesn’t want to leave. Plus that girl who helped me with the straw maze, Rachel...she could use a friend nearby.”
“I know things are hard at home, Ally.” Nina’s heart broke for the girl. “I was seriously overlooked by my parents and it just...sucked. But your parents love you and I don’t think they have any idea how much their lives are spilling over into yours right now. Plus, you’ll never get this time back. You could still have the most magical senior year ever with Ethan. And you have a new friend who could turn out to be as important for you as you’ve been for her.” Nina shook her head. “I would not walk away from things now, just when Heartache is going to start being really good to Ally Finley.”
“That would be interesting to see.” A smile curled one corner of Ally’s lips. “I guess I can stick it out through graduation.”
Nina rushed to hug her. “Yes. Please do that.”
Ally squeezed her back. “Ethan is pretty great incentive. But I’m also glad that my grandmother seems better.”
“She’s a wise woman,” Nina admitted. “And I’m sure she’d have a very frank opinion about you leaving town.”
Ally burst out laughing. “You think?”
“And now, I’m in town.” Nina gave Ally’s fingers a quick squeeze before she moved back to the carafe and set it on the table. “You can help me figure out what kind of restaurant would do well here, and I’ll make sure I’m around if you need to...maybe...vent.”
“I know nothing about restaurants.” Ally go
t to her feet and started taking clean cups from the food-service window to set out on the table around the carafe. “That’s more Uncle Mack’s department, right? Wouldn’t you rather have my help figuring out how we can get Uncle Mack to stay in town?”
Nina nearly lost her grip on a stack of cups. She juggled them just in time, but not without a lot of clattering as she imagined sharing a business with Mack. But they’d never have a business—or anything—together.
“Sorry.” Ally took a few of them from her. “Guess I inherited a little too much of Gram’s frankness.”
“No. I mean, it’s fine if you did.” Nina set down the rest of the dishes. “I ought to realize by now that I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve.”
“We’ll keep working on him,” Ally assured her. “I can tell he’s really crazy about you.”
Nina nodded, which seemed to satisfy Ally before she hurried off to hold the door for Ethan as he wrestled with a load of firewood for the huge hearth at one end of the dining hall.
But Nina knew that being crazy about each other just wasn’t enough, no matter how desperately she wanted it to be. She just hoped she could hold herself together when the music started for the last dance of the night. When she’d have to say goodbye.
* * *
MACK WATCHED NINA work the room, enjoying the simple pleasure of seeing her laugh and smile as she passed out cups of mulled cider and accepted suggestions for the kind of business she should open in Heartache. He wasn’t close enough to hear whatever she was discussing now with a local realtor, but the conversation looked more serious than the last few she’d had.
The band ended a song and the dancers applauded. “Ladies and gentlemen, I’m going to turn the MC duties over to our interim mayor who will announce your Harvest Festival king and queen!”
Nina’s gaze met his for a split second before the mayor—a guy who’d been the head of debate club a few years before Mack graduated—took the stage. Was Nina remembering the year she and Mack had been king and queen? He’d been so proud to have her on his arm. So happy to spend the whole night with her and escape his family life. Now, she wanted a family with him and he was too scared to try.