by Sariah Skye
Trystan’s eyes widened. “Ava, what is it?”
“I…” I stammered, eyeing him. His lips were swollen from our kiss, his face flushed with heat, and his chest rose and fell rapidly. There was also the matter of the rather large bulge in his pants. He was ready to go—and up until seconds ago, so was I.
So, what the fuck gives?
He frowned deeply, placing a hand over his heart. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to go so far…I thought that…” he trailed off, unable to find the words. “Is it the magic?”
I bit my lip nervously, feeling my heart sink into my stomach. Still clutching the stone, I paused thoughtfully. I didn’t feel that telltale prickle that the magic was ready to explode. No, this panic was something else entirely; something I didn’t comprehend.
“Avie?” Trystan cocked his head, confused. He reached for me blindly; gaze was fixated towards me, but his eyes didn’t focus on anywhere specific. “You’ve gone invisible again. Did you run off?”
“I…” I swallowed. “I’m sorry, I’ll just—” I clutched the stair railing, and took a step backward up the stairs.
“Oh no. You’re not bolting this time, Ava.” Trystan swiped out a hand, still completely focused. I tried to dodge him, but he found my arm, and clutched it just under my elbow. “Look, I don’t care if you don’t want to be with me. With any of us. I don’t care if you turn me down until the next millennium. You don’t love us? Fine. But you are going to talk about it—we’re going to deal with this once and for all.” His tone was firm and stern. “I know that invisible magic means you’re scared. I don’t know if you’re scared to hurt me, scared to fuck me, or what. I swear to fucking god, I’ll live. But if you’re afraid of getting close—don’t be.”
My head snapped upward, and I peered at him through blurry, tearful eyes. I didn’t realize I had started crying. The air around us shimmered, and Trystan acknowledged the absence of magic with a side-nod of his head.
“Good. We’re making progress.” He didn’t release my arm, but he stared me down intently.
I shivered under the weight of his stare, my anxiety getting the better of me.
“Are you scared of me?” Trystan raised one auburn brow gently, appearing slightly affronted.
“What? No! I—” I cut myself off, pondering.
Trystan shook his head, sighing. With his free hand, he rubbed the tension out of his opposite bicep. “Ava…please. Let’s just talk. You don’t want to kiss me or make love to me—” I blushed profusely at his word. What the fuck, Ava? Blushing? You’ve had sex before! You’ve only dreamed about bonking each of these guys for days! Weeks! And now? What the fuck is your problem?
“—is that it?” Trystan asked, amused. He shook of the jesting expression and continued. “Look, you don’t want to be with me, fine. But I’m not letting you run any longer, until it’s all out there. Got it?”
I sighed heavily, my gaze drooping. “Got it.”
He thrust his hand under my chin, and quickly brought my gaze upward. “Do not ever be ashamed in this house. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You hold your head high at all times. Because here, you’re special. I cannot speak for all the fucking arseholes out there you’ve dated, and ignored you like the bloody scum they are—but here? You’re magic. You’re queen. We love having you here. We love it so much, we forgot that you were ever not here, Ava. That’s why we didn’t think to pursue you properly, like we should have. You just…fit.” I desperately wanted to avert my gaze, but he pinned my face with a soft grip. It didn’t hurt, but he wasn’t letting me skirt my eyes away. His green eyes were bright, and wrought with intensity, it nearly made me squirm. Not because I was offended by his words, or his touch…but because even though my mind wanted me to bolt, my body wanted nothing of the sort.
I didn’t speak, just stood there, open mouthed, and panted heavily.
“We adore you, Avalon. I adore you,” Trystan said, his tone softening. He released his grip, but his gaze remained firm. “I’m not sure what else we can do to prove it to you,” his voice quivered with emotion. He dropped his gaze, frowning; waiting for me to speak.
I opened my mouth to talk, but nothing came out as I processed his words. We adore you. I adore you.
He sighed; I realized too much time had passed and now we were in awkward silence.
Trystan’s handsome face fell, his expression clearly crestfallen. All my stubbornness and anxiety just shattered, watching him he spin around, away from me, shaking his head remorsefully.
“Shit.” I mumbled quietly.
“They don’t really love you. It’s just the curse.” My mother’s voice echoed inside my mind, over and over. I squinted, pressing my fingers against my temples, attempting to make that voice go away once and for all.
“Do you?” I asked quietly.
He spun back around, cocking his head in a confused manner. “Do I what?”
“Adore me. Do you really? Or is it the curse?” I asked carefully.
“I…huh? The curse? The Avalon curse?” He ran a hand through his hair, and scratched his scalp lightly, clearly perplexed.
I shook my head. “The incubus curse. Which I suppose could fall under more of the Avalon shit,” I spat venomously. “I can’t imagine how hard it is for you, year after year, decade after decade not being able to truly be with anyone. I mean—you’re demons, but really you should be fucking saints. You deny yourselves day in and day out, because you’re trying not to hurt anyone. I’m sure you walk around with a case of perpetual blue balls because you cannot ever properly give in to anyone!”
Trystan snickered. “Well, that’s true. Though, they’re so blue now, they’re purple.”
I cringed. “Ew. I like purple but…no.”
“Rightly so,” he said with a chuckle. His forehead creased. “Wait—is that what this is about? You think we just want to fuck you—because we can? That we don’t honestly care about you?”
I shrugged. “The thought had occurred to me.”
Trystan slapped his hands over his face and raked his fingers over his jawline. “Och, I can’t believe I didn’t think of this. Ava—how can you not think we care? If we just wanted to fuck you, would we try to protect you? And why let you live here?”
“I dunno. A live-in tramp; that would be nice. Ready and willing whenever, right?” I sneered.
Trystan glared, shaking his head. “Ava. We let you live here because we cannot live without you. We would miss you if you’ve gone. You brighten up our entire days. Mathias offered for you to quit your job. He offered to build you a pool! We have been after him to get a pool for years!”
I shrugged. “So? I mean…big deal. That’s like not much for you all. A few thousand for a pool? Clearly,” I said, motioning around us at the large house, with all the technology and its amenities, “you aren’t hurting for anything.”
“Och! Yer bum’s oot the windae!” He tossed up his hands in exasperation, chuckling crazily.
I cocked a brow. “What now?” I could barely understand him, his accent so thick.
“It means you’re crazy! Talking rubbish!” He stomped towards me and clung to my arm securely. He brought me to my feet, staring at me raptly. “Listen, Ava…we have worked very hard for everything we have. Hard. We’re all right now, but for a long time we lived on the streets, begging and sleeping the gutters. It took a long time, but we made it. And we are more than happy to share it with you because what is life worth if you can’t share it with someone you love?”
I scoffed. “You said ‘love.’”
He raised one eyebrow severely. “Aye. I said love. Because it’s true. Do you not see it? Do you truly not? Mathias brought you puppies because he wanted you to feel you fit in! Bash worked for weeks to make that gem for you, because the magic was hurting you. You didn’t see his burns—but I did. He healed fast—but they sure looked like they hurt!”
“I—” I began, but Trystan raised a finger, stopping me.
“Oh no, you’re
going to let me finish! Have you been in Xander’s studio lately?” Trystan asked, his eyes intent on me. I tried to shy my away, but with a persistent hand he pushed my face forward, facing him again. Trystan was laid back and joking most of the time; but this serious Trystan I hadn’t seen so much before. My body and mind warred under his severity, like two angels sitting on opposite shoulders: the good angel, and the bad. My mind wanted me to get pissed and push him away for forcing me to listen to him, for not letting me run. The arousal I still felt deep in my belly wanted to believe everything he was saying, tear off his pants, and have my way with him. And my heart just desperately wanted his words to mend the scars that past boyfriends’ left behind when in their ignorance, they shattered it to pieces.
“Well? Have ye?” Trystan demanded, squeezing his grip a bit tighter—not enough to hurt, but enough to let me know he meant business.
“Have I—” Oh yeah, Xander’s studio. “No, not since I first met you guys and you were all showing me around. I just sorta felt like that was his private space.”
Trystan grinned with self-satisfaction. “So you haven’t seen his newest works?”
I shook my head. “No…why?”
“Everything is inspired by you. Paintings. Sketches. Photos—he cannot stop!” Trystan said.
I flinched, surprised. “Really? But…”
“He didn’t tell you because he thought you might find it creepy. But it’s all beautiful Ava. And I’ve only seen a little of it.”
A flush crept over my cheeks. “Why me, though? With all the gardens, and animals and scenery here—why me?”
Trystan released me finally, only groan in frustration. He clutched his hair by the roots. “Gah! Ava, because he loves you! To him—to us—you are the most beautiful woman we have ever seen!”
Trystan’s words choked any smart-ass rebuttal I might have spouted off in my throat. I stammered instead, “Well…I…”
“And don’t give me that nonsense that ‘we’ve seen so many’. Aye, it’s true. We’ve met a lot of women. We’ve bedded them, not because we desired them, but because we desired to live. The only thing that has kept us going all of these years is the hope we would find someone like you. Long before we ever knew you existed, the thought of you kept us alive. And now that that hope has been realized, it’s your spirit and your heart that continues to keep him enamored. Us enamored!” Trystan’s expression softened, and as he gently stroked my cheek. “We’re not the men from your past. They were losers. Arseholes. Denizens from hell!” He declared loudly, and I chuckled. “We’re your present, and your future. You just have to let us in. If all we wanted was to keep you around for fucking, Mathias wouldn’t have driven across the state to arrange to get those puppies, and he wouldn’t be waking up early every morning just to cook you breakfast. He rarely did that for us. Bash wouldn’t have spent countless hours working on that gem; nor would he let you see him at his most vulnerable when he was panicking over his dreams. Xander wouldn’t be Xander, trying to romance you with everything that he has, or spending all his free time trying to get you out of his mind, and on to paper. We’d just call you here and there, come over, get in your pants, and leave. We’d keep you just interested and confused enough to keep you coming back. And the pool thing! Seriously, he’s been adamant against one for years. Years, Ava! One mention from you, and Mathias is putty in your hands and agrees like it’s nothing”
I blinked, trying to stifle the tears brimming in my eyes.
Avalon has the power to heal; let it heal you. Heal all of you. I could swear the voice of Igraine—my supposed grandmother—echoed in my mind, and I smelled the faint scent of fresh earth ever so briefly.
“Ava?” Trystan dared to ask, after a moment’s silence.
I sighed carefully, searching the man before me. I leaned my head against his arm, raising my hand to gently trace the outline of his winged tattoos. Even though his eyes were lit up with intensity, his mouth pressed into a worried frown, he didn’t push any further; just let me take in everything.
“We’re not Morgaine, Ava,” he finally whispered as I searched his gorgeous face. “We’re not leaving. Okay? And we’re not Lancelot, and nothing will keep us away, unless that is what you want.”
I nodded slowly, as he titled his head to the side carefully. My lips parted in anticipation for his kiss, and he obliged. Carefully at first, but when I opened my mouth to let him in, his tongue eagerly searched for mine. He wrapped his entire body around me, kneeling and parting his legs, pulling me between them. There was no space between us as he quickened the kiss. I placed my palms on his taut stomach, which felt heavenly under my fingers. His skin was warm and soothing, and between that and his passionate kiss, the cold hardness of fear in my heart…began to melt away.
I pouted out loud when Trystan broke our kiss. “Aw…”
Trystan bobbed his head towards the door. “Come. Let me show you something.”
Cocking a suspicious brow, I grinned. “Oh? What?”
“You’ll see. Something I’ve been working on for a while.” Trystan gently cupped my arms, rubbing his hands up and down, sending shivers down my back, especially as he grinned playfully at me. “I couldn’t let the other guys make me look bad.”
I laughed lightly. “How could you look bad?”
He shrugged. “Xander’s turned you into his muse. Mathias brought puppies. Bash gave you jewelry,” he said, snickering, as I clutched the large gem against my chest. “I had to bring you something unique, and I think you’ll appreciate it as someone who prefers her space occasionally.” Trystan rose slowly, still keeping one of my hands in his. He motioned out the front door, and I followed him quickly to the barn outside. The sun hung low in the sky but wasn’t set, giving the property a golden glow as we entered.
It didn’t appear different than it normally did. There was a small kitchenette area with a large pantry, fridge, and deep freeze for various foods and medications for the animals that stayed on the property. Several empty stables were along the far wall, with hay bales stacked high, waiting for a large mammal to need them. The ceilings were high, with beams crisscrossing about, and a lone window streamed in light from the south wall.
I squinted in confusion. “You…cleaned the barn for me?”
Trystan burst out laughing. “Och, lass! Give me some credit, I’m not that pathetic.” He led me to the center of the barn and released my hand. He kicked away a layer of straw from the wooden floor, exposing the outlines of a trap door, and a metal latch. “It’s a storm cellar. Mostly, I use it for when we need to care for an animal around the clock. Sometimes we use it during heavy storms to give them a place to go. Often, I come down here for privacy. There was nothing here but a cot and some shelves, but I made…improvements.” He lifted the latch and the trap door released, exposing a flight of wooden stairs. Trystan beckoned for me to follow, and I obliged after he flicked on a light switch. When I reached the bottom of the stairs, I saw just what he meant.
Chapter Twenty-Four
My hand immediately flew to my open mouth, and I gasped in awe.
“Do ye like it?” Trystan asked hesitantly.
“It’s—” I stammered, taking it all in.
It was a small room, of course. The walls were dark, but antique glass sconces hung on the walls, with little lights inside designed to mimic dancing candle flames. A couple of plush rugs in white, blue, and a deep blue were tossed on the ground, along with large plush pillows. Hundreds of fairy lights in white swathed the ceiling, with a round canopy trailing out and down, over a thick plush cushion that resembled a cozy bed covered with multicolored blankets in various thicknesses and textures. Pink rose petals covered every square inch, and a silky blue canopy hung from the ceiling, and trailed over the bed, and onto the floor.
“You did this today?” I asked.
“No, actually when you first agreed to stay with us I revamped it some and have been working on it ever since. I come here often, even when the animals are fi
ne. Sometimes I just need a bit of freedom, eh?” He said, with a wink. “I had a feeling you do, too.”
I shook my head slowly, taking it all in. “I…but why? The house is big, and you already did that bedroom for me!”
Trystan raked his hands through his hair, sauntering over towards me, with a confident swagger in his hips. I swallowed a lump forming in my throat, hoping it didn’t further encourage the butterflies taking residence in the abyss of my nervous stomach. I eyed him carefully, as he gently took my face in his hand, threading his fingers in my hair. “Aye, we did do that. But this is just me. We want nothing more than to keep you here and make you happy. We all have our own ways of trying to prove that to you, though we weren’t obvious enough. It’s been a long time since any of us have seriously courted a woman,” he said, his voice husky, accent drawling thicker with each word. “We failed to consider that outside you’re a supernatural, but inside, you’re a human woman with a broken heart, putting on a façade that you’re whole. It’s up to us to put that heart together again, one piece at a time. If you’ll let us…” Trystan inched closer to me once again for the second time tonight, his lips a mere heartbeat away from mine. His chest rose and fell rapidly, as he placed his other hand squarely on my hip. Out of instinct, my breath caught in a panic, and I took a small step backward.
“Ah-ah, Avie. You’re not running from me. Not this time,” Trystan said, with a lilt of playfulness. For every step backward I took, he took a step forward; one hand securely on my hip, the other still caressing my cheek. His thumb grazed against my jawline, his gaze never leaving mine, no matter how I tried to avert.
“You’re…not letting go, are you?” I asked, first with anxiety, but my confidence rose with each syllable I uttered.
A sexy smile spread across Trystan’s kiss-swollen lips. “Aye, that’s right. I’m not letting go until you’ve got it through your head: we’re not going anywhere. No matter what you do.”