by Diana Rivers
We consulted often with Jhemar and Zenoria and the others who had gone south with the horses. It was from them that we heard the rumors of unrest, or perhaps even rebellion, in the south; rebellion in the city of Mishghall or in some of the coastal settlements. The rumors made for exciting talk, but none of them was clear enough for making plans. Pell began to speak of sending scouts to Mishghall, such as Josleen and Megyair, or even of going there herself. The same fears attacked me as when the talk was of going to Eezore, but this time I already knew I would go wherever Pell went and do whatever she asked of me.
Now that I was able to look around me again and had some awareness of others, I could see how much we had changed during our time in the caves. Before, we had all been “green girls,” as Alyeeta liked to say, confused and mistrustful of one another, unsure of ourselves and our powers. Now, with the help of the Witches, we were becoming a people, more secure in our powers, more united in spite of our differences and our quarrels, proud and confident in a way we had never been before. I could hear it all around me in the way women talked, see it in the way we moved, almost feel it in the air.
One result was that we were both more united and less so. Pell was no longer the undisputed leader. Many of us were finding our own voices. Each little group seemed to be creating its own leaders. There were also women who spoke for the larger groups and were more listened to among them: Murghanth and Teko among the Sheezerti; Kilghari and Daijar among the Muinyairin; Lhiri for the former slaves of Eezore, and Ashai for the former Shokarn of that city; Maireth for the women of the Circle; Vestri for the Potters; and Johalla among the Wanderers. Mouraine, Permeeth, and Shartel, who had been leaders of the other encampments, still had a following here. In spite of being Pell’s second-in-command, I found myself, along with Renaise and Kazouri, being pressed to speak on behalf of the Kourmairi. With all these different factions, there was constant tension and confusion in the camp. The impatience to be gone was rising among us, but so was the conflict over whether to mix into the affairs of Mishghall. If we did, it might be possible to save the city and secure the coast; if we didn’t, we might be able to skirt around the city and remain invisible to the Zarn’s guards.
One warm, sunny morning, after days of cold rain, I was taking my turn at standing watch by the cave entrance. The glint of the sun on something shiny caught my attention. I turned and was amazed to see an elegantly dressed man, apparently a stranger, riding in from the edge of the woods. Illyati and Johalla rode on either side of him, talking intently. Quickly, I raised the shell to blow a warning—but then I lowered it again. From the way they all rode together, those two seemed to know him, so instead, I watched and waited with curiosity. This man was dressed in the manner of a Shokarn Highborn, yet there was something oddly familiar about him, especially as he rode closer. Suddenly I felt Hereschell’s presence in my head. Do you know someone only by their clothes, Tazzi?
“Hereschell!” I shouted as I set down the shell and ran to meet him. While we were exchanging greetings, several others ran up, Murghanth and Teko among them, along with some of the other Sheezerti. Murghanth cocked her head to one side and said in her most derisive manner, “So, you left here a Wanderer-beggar and have come back as a prince of Eezore. There must be a fine story in that, one worth hearing and retelling.” Then her voice shifted. With both eagerness and sadness she asked, “Tell us of Eezore? How does it fare? Is the Zarn still in power? Are there any Sheezerti that you know of, still in hiding?”
Just at that moment, Pell joined us. She whistled in surprise, then began walking round and round, examining him. “Tell me, Hereschell, have you joined the Thieves Guild and become their chief? Or has some Shokarn lord discovered in you his long-lost relative?”
By then, others had gathered and were clamoring with questions of their own about where he had been and what he knew and whether, indeed, there was a rebellion raging in Mishghall. Lhiri, Nunyair, and Ashai wanted news of Eezore. Kazouri and Pell wanted to know about troop movements. Renaise asked about the possibility of more provisions. Murghanth continued her insistent questions about both Eezore and Mishghall. In this she was echoed by the other Sheezerti. I knew how desperately they missed city life, and thought that perhaps they had their own plans for Mishghall. Meanwhile, Illyati and Johalla were plainly angered by our rudeness. Trying to make herself heard over the commotion, Johalla shouted several times, “That is enough now!”
Hereschell, however, seemed to take no offense. He grinned down at us, plainly pleased with himself and the effect he was having. “Well, I see the Hadera Lossi have no better manners than when I saw them last. Wanderers would never think of questioning weary travelers in this way until they had been fed and rested and their horses watered and cared for.”
In spite of his reproof, this was followed by another burst of questions. Clearly, Hereschell had no intention of answering at that moment. Finally Renaise called out loudly, “Come to my fire pit, Hereschell. There we will make you a traveler’s welcome. I will find you soup and bread and a place to sit.” In a quieter voice that had a little mockery in it, she added, “It may not be suitable for such a fine gentleman, but it is the best we can do in this poor place. The winter has been hard and our supplies are almost gone.”
Hereschell made a slight bow from his horse. “A true gentleman accepts graciously whatever is offered.” At that moment, Kazouri let out a roar for attention. With Daijar’s help, she pushed through the crowd to make a path. Hereschell dismounted and handed the reins to. her. He followed Renaise, with the rest of us trailing after them.
Though Hereschell smiled and laughed and joked with us and talked of the weather and horses and exchanged some gossip with Alyeeta about their shared past, it was not till after he had finished his second bowl of soup and cleaned the bowl with yet another piece of bread, lit a jol pipe, and taken several puffs that he at last consented to answer our questions.
“So you want to know how I came by these clothes? In the simplest way possible. They were given to me. And no, Pell, I did not join the Thieves Guild. I came by them honestly. I spent this last winter in Eezore as assistant gardener in a Great-House, playing dumb, being silent, and learning all manner of useful and amazing things, such as how they grow plants all winter in glass houses and where the Zarn’s guards are moving next. These clothes were given to me by the young master of the house. As oldest son, he has been called to be captain of the guards and will probably be in uniform for some time. He is being sent to Mishghall to reinforce the Zarn’s forces. They are being hard pressed there.”
Hereschell shook his head, and I saw a look of grief cross his face. Then he said with some anger, “Lorren is no more suited to be a soldier and fight for the Zarn than I am, but as the oldest son he will do as he is ordered by his father and the Zarn. It is expected of the sons of the Highborn. I must say, I am glad to be a Wanderer, able to move as I please and answer to no one but myself. And yes, there is a hard-fought rebellion being waged in Mishghall. At this moment, the Kourmairi appear to be winning. The Zarn is worried enough to send reinforcements and that is what my young captain will lead.
“If he gets there in time, he will probably be able to secure the city and bring all those people under the heel of the Zarns again. If not, Mishghall will be free and, with it, all the settlements along this part of the coast. Perhaps in time, all of Yarmald can free itself again from the power of the Zarns. But not if Lorren succeeds in his mission. First, of course, he must get his men across the river in spring flood time, not an easy thing to do if all the bridges are gone. I am planning to ride south tomorrow with word that the Zarn is sending more men.”
He shook his head again, and I could feel his pain almost as if it were in my own heart. “And so I betray the one Ganja in all of Eezore whom I trusted with my friendship and my voice, the one Ganja in that whole city who knew my true self and both loved and trusted me. With Lorren, I did not play at being dumb and mindless. We sat up many nights, he and I, by
the light of just one candle, talking of everything you can imagine. I know my friendship mattered to him, too, for whom can a Shokarn lord really trust and share his heart with? Even so, I cannot betray the people of Mishghall to certain slaughter for the sake of one friend.”
As he spoke, I had been looking about hopefully. When he finished, I asked him, almost in a whisper, “Where is Soneeshi the wolf? Is she hiding in the woods? I cannot sense her anywhere.”
Hereschell shook his head a third time, and I felt my heart sink. “Gone back to the wild things when I left for Eezore,” he said sadly. “But perhaps we shall meet again in Yarmald.” Alyeeta was watching me intently. I turned away to hide my tears.
There followed a day of questions and maps and strategy disputes that went on into the evening. Arguments broke out among us along the old lines. The Kourmairi, the Sheezerti, and even some of the Wanderers among us spoke for helping the people of Mishghall in whatever way we were able. Pell, especially, had strong words to say in that direction, and I felt the chill of fate as I listened to her. The Muinyairin, on the other hand, were used to the wild desert and had no wish to go into the city. Many of the Shokarn, more afraid than the rest of us of the Shokarn guards, sided with them in a strange alliance. Suddenly we were separate peoples again, and not Khal Hadera Lossien together, or even “Hadera Lossi,” as Hereschell said we were being called now in the world out there.
In the midst of this clamor, Pell called out, “What of us? Is the Zarn still hunting us?”
“The talk is that he thinks you have vanished mysteriously, witched away, perhaps. He still wants to find you. I am sure he would sleep better at night knowing that the matter was finished. But you are not his greatest worry at this moment. Right now, Mishghall, with its great port on the sea, is what draws most of his attention. And he is fearful of losing all of Yarmald as well. It is truly amazing how much the great and powerful can find to worry on.”
Immediately, the argument flared up again. Hayika leapt to her feet, shouting, “Then we should slip by and vanish forever. What better time than when he is occupied elsewhere? Why let him know that we still exist? Or where we are? I, for one, am ready to ride as far away from men as possible. They mean nothing but trouble for us.” Several Muinyairin shouted their accord.
“How do you expect to slip by?” Mouraine roared back. When she stood up to be better heard, I could see the sun flashing from her startling golden hair that was such a contrast to her dark skin. With her hands on her hips she was a formidable-looking woman. “The whole area, from the coast to the Escuro River, will be swarming with guards. How do you think we can vanish once we are out of the caves and on the move again?” There were mutterings of agreement from the women around her, women who had been part of her camp.
“What have we to do with the city of Mishghall? It is no affair of ours,” Nunyair called back loudly.
At that, Murghanth began waving her thin, dark arms and stamping her feet in excitement. “Should we leave them trapped there just when they have almost won and there is a chance to free that whole part of the coast? What if we had left you to your fate in Eezore? Where would you be now? All you care about is your own, white, Shokarn skin and keeping it safe.”
“Not so…,” Nunyair shouted back, but Daijar interrupted her: “And what do you expect us to do? Fight like an army? You know we cannot do that. I say we take this opportunity while the Zarn is busy with Mishghall to disappear forever and find our own safe place far from them all.”
“And I say that is a coward’s choice!” Kazouri roared out over all the other voices.
“Yes! Yes! Yes! A coward’s choice,” Murghanth echoed, leaping up and down with her words.
“And I say you are fools who would sacrifice the rest of us, because some of you are still more loyal to the Kourmairi than to this Khal Hadera Lossien you all pretend to be.” Hayika turned abruptly to look at Rishka. “What of you, Rishka?” she challenged suddenly. “You are unusually quiet. Will you ride with your Muinyairin sisters? This is all more dangerous than the shifting sands. Will you ride with us out of this trap?”
There was a moment of silence as all eyes turned toward Rishka. She drew herself up very straight and said loudly, “At this moment I will follow where Pell leads.” This was instantly followed by cheers of approval and hoots of derision. Then the argument broke out louder than before. It grew so heated, I felt as if we were back at Alyeeta’s clearing with peace among us to be made all over again or, worse yet, perhaps not even possible. Pell, who had already said her piece, kept strangely quiet through all this. It was as if she were observing it all from some great distance. Kilghari, Amelia, and Dorca, with their gentler ways, tried to keep some civility between us, but it was hopeless. Patience had been frayed by our long winter of enforced confinement, and tempers flared like fires in the wind. If our powers had not prevented it, I think we might well have been rolling on the ground, beating on each other with our fists.
My fear was that Alyeeta would suddenly turn one of her silencings on us. I was very aware of the Witches. They had moved away when our argument broke out and were gathered off to one side, watching us and talking among themselves. Finally I saw Olna nod. As Alyeeta took some steps in our direction, I felt the hair on the back of my neck go up. Just then Pell jumped up on a log and banged two pot lids together for silence. All heads turned toward her. For that moment, at least, the uproar abated and she had our attention.
As I have already said, Pell was no longer undisputed leader. Still, she had some authority among us, though I think it was her fairness that made others listen when she spoke. “There is no one course that will please us all,” she called out. “That much, at least, is clear in this rain of mud. Perhaps that is as it should be. But even if we have different roads to travel, from this far away it is hard to know how to proceed. I propose that we all ride south together. Those who wish to skirt the city and continue south should separate from us after we reach the first of the Kourmairi settlements and go on with the extra horses and provisions. Perhaps from there, with more knowledge, you can discover how to pass unnoticed. The rest of us can continue toward the city to see how we can be of use there. From that closer vantage point, we can better plan what to do, after we see what is safe and what is even possible, since we are certainly not an army that can gather to fight another army. That way, if things go badly, we have not all committed to one course. And we must agree on a place to meet again afterward and a plan for summoning aid if we are in trouble.”
Pell paused for a moment to catch her breath. When the noise level rose, she banged the pot lids again for silence. “Whether or not we encounter the Zarn’s army, we must still move south as soon as possible and find a place to settle. If the Zarn’s men retake Mishghall and go all the way to the coast, they will have us pinned here in the northland. I say enough of this arguing. The horses are fed and rested. Let us pack and leave. Sisters, let us ride south together in two days’ time.” She waved her arms to show that she was finished and jumped down. What she said had all been very simple, but women cheered and clapped. There was no more dissent. Voices called out, “Yes, let us move on.” “Time to be gone from here.” “Southward together.” “On to Mishghall.” “On to a new home.” Pell had stopped our quarreling with one another, at least for the moment.
By the morning of the third day, we were mounted and on the road, moving south. Hereschell had already left to warn Mishghall of the coming of the Zarn’s reinforcements. Mud and rain had slowed our departure, but now a new, bright sun was shining on the sodden landscape, making the world sparkle. Every little stream had turned into a rushing torrent, and the road itself was like a shallow river, but for that moment, the sky was blue and our hopes were high. After all our arguing, we were united again and glad to be riding together, even if we were soon to part.
This time we rode openly. There was no way to hide so many. Let the army of the Zarn of Eezore see us. Let all the Zarns of Garmishair hear of
us. This time, let them be the ones to be afraid. The pleasure of it was intoxicating. We made no pretense of being men. We let our hair show, dressed as we pleased, wore bright clothes, raised our banners, sang loudly, and remembered again that we loved each other. The Hadera Lossi were on the move. Let others deal with us as they could. This time we were a force to be reckoned with.
As I had nothing festive of my own, I had borrowed something bright from both Rishka and Lhiri and, in the end, felt very splendid. I looked around at us all and thought how fine we looked on that bright day, all color and courage. Somehow, out of the mixtures of all our cultures, we had made a style of our own. The Hadera Lossi. Hereschell had said that is what they called us now. Would we simply be called Hadra someday, as I had seen in my vision from the hill above the Wanderer camp? I wondered if the place I saw that day lay somewhere in our future.
Full of joy at being alive in the world and glad to be on the road again, I turned to Pell. “After all this with Mishghall is over, where will we go?”
Pell answered immediately, “Wherever you lead us, Tazzi. After Mishghall, I am ready to put down this load.” I shivered and the day seemed a little less bright. Though there was this momentary break in the rain, from far off in the distance I could hear the sound of thunder again.
During this part of our journey, it was really Alyeeta who led us. She knew of a settlement near Mishghall where she said we would find welcome. “The headman is a good friend of mine. He will be very glad to see me again.” I could not imagine how anyone could be glad to see such a mob of women, but for that moment I was willing to just follow wherever she led.