A soldier should die with her head held high.
Sarissa smiled. For once, she agreed with her sister.
****
Bethany stared at the Abbey’s front doors and asked no one in particular, “Should we knock?”
“Are you certain this is where Sarissa is?” Jovan asked.
Bethany shrugged. “Myra said so. And everything I’ve heard said Sarissa was still here, while most of the Magi moved south to Castle brook.”
“This place looks abandoned,” said Arrago.
“It isn’t,” Bethany said quietly. She could feel the dark energy of Magic stirring in the area. It was faint, but it was still there. A lot of people and things had died here in the name of procuring power in many forms. Bethany’s head ached and she winced against the pain. The healers had done a decent job of fixing up her lungs, and two nights’ rest and food had done wonders for her exhaustion, so she knew this was from the Magic she sensed around her.
“I didn’t miss that,” Bethany muttered.
“Hmm?” Jovan leaned around Arrago and stared at her. “What’s wrong?”
“Headache. The ground practically hums with Magic.”
Jovan and Arrago drew their swords in one smooth gesture. Behind them, Erem, Kiner, and Myra did the same, though the clumsy sound after they’d all drawn betrayed the unpracticed hand of Myra. Bethany had asked Myra to remain close to them because she knew the Island’s defences in this region better than anyone right now, having spent several weeks now hidden and spying behind the barrier.
Bethany looked over her shoulder at Myra. The poor girl was pale-faced and held her sword awkwardly in a white-knuckled grip. “All right. Myra? When we get out of this, I’m going to teach you how to hold a sword. You’re supposed to scare the person you’re pointing it at, not yourself.”
“Sorry Lady Bethany. I’ve only had basic weapons training and they never let me use real swords.”
“Of course,” Kiner mumbled. “Idiots.”
“You’re sure she’s here?” Bethany asked. “Couldn’t she have moved on?”
Myra shrugged. “I suppose, but this is where she’s been for months now. People are saying she’s unstable and quite ill. The last weeks I’d heard that people were disappearing or dying—important people in her inner circle. I guess it’s possible she’s moved on, but from the sounds of it, Sarissa is in no state to go anywhere.”
“Look,” Arrago said sharply.
Bethany turned and saw the front wooden gate slowly open. An arm poked out from the protection of the gates and waved a white sheet. A young human girl, brown skin and black hair, poked her head out to look at them.
Jovan jumped down off his horse and Bethany followed his lead. Jovan turned and said, “Wait, Majesty. Stay back in case it’s a trap.”
Arrago grumbled, but stayed back. Bethany walked to the gate, hand on the Blessed Blade she’d drawn. The other Blade rested comfortably on her back still, but she could draw it in the blink of an eye if necessary. For now, one was enough. Jovan likewise had his own Blade in his hand. They approached the gate, keeping a safe distance.
“Who are you?” Jovan shouted out.
“Wendy, Lady Sarissa’s maid,” the girl replied. “Lady Sarissa said she surrenders and you can come get her.”
“How many people are inside the Abbey?” Bethany asked.
“Just me and her ladyship. Everyone else left days ago, when the barrier exploded.”
“Where are they?” Jovan asked.
“Um, some went to Castle Brook, I believe. I don’t know exactly, though.”
“So you’re saying there is no one inside but you and Sarissa?”
She nodded. “Her ladyship was too ill to move. It was best that she stay here.”
“Where’s her husband?” Bethany called.
“Dead. Sarissa killed him.” The maid looked nervously around and lowered her voice so it was difficult for Bethany to hear her. “Lady Sarissa is unwell. Please. Come in and do what you need to do. She’s waiting for you.”
Bethany turned to Jovan. “Trap?”
“I almost hope so,” he said. “This is too easy.”
“Something’s very wrong here.” She called out to the maid: “How many people can I bring inside with me?”
“Her ladyship didn’t actually say. She just said when I see her twin sister—and I’m assuming that’s you—to let you in for her to surrender to you.”
“You said she’s sick. What do you mean?”
The maid glanced around and stepped out from the gate. Bethany grabbed her other sword from her back and the girl held up her hands. “Please. I don’t want her to hear.”
Jovan motioned for her to come closer. She took several more steps before he said, “Far enough.”
“Lady Sarissa hears voices. She sometimes thinks she’s her sister Bethany. Is that you?”
Bethany nodded. “It is.”
“Lady Sarissa has been unstable for months now. She talks to herself and sometimes isn’t herself. Lord Robert, her husband, tried to run things as best as he could, but then…” The maid gulped. “I believe Lady Sarissa killed him. Please. She’s waiting in the chapel.”
“What is she planning to do when we get there?” Bethany asked.
“Die,” the maid said simply. “She’s planning to die.”
****
Bethany followed the servant through the abandoned corridors, Jovan at her side. Behind her walked Erem, Arrago, and Kiner. She craned her neck several times, prepared for the barrage of arrows or pure Magic to descend upon their heads, but nothing came.
“It’s kinda spooky here,” Jovan whispered.
Bethany nodded, but continued to follow the maid across the courtyard and into more winding corridors. There was no one here, not even servants. How was Sarissa even managing, if there was just this one girl looking after her? Had she really killed them all?
“What happened here?” Bethany asked. “Is everyone truly gone?”
The maid turned. “Everyone is gone to Castle Brook.”
“But why?”
The maid bit her lip. “You’ll understand better when you see her ladyship. Come.”
Bethany shrugged at Jovan and they kept walking. Her Blessed Blades were sheathed, but the hum of Power was strong in her veins. It was borrowed, true, but it was there. If Sarissa attacked, Bethany could defend herself and her friends.
The maid knocked and a voice Bethany would recognize anywhere answered.
“Come in, Bethany.”
Bethany pushed the door open with the palm of her hand, the other on the hilt of her Blessed Blade.
She stared at her sister.
Sarissa was gaunt and sallow-skinned. Her hair had more grey in the auburn than it had the last time they’d seen each other in the flesh, over a year ago. Sarissa wore a white dress, and though it was dull with age and dust, it was unstained. She stood behind a small table, with her hands outstretched at her sides.
“I surrender,” Sarissa said in a steady voice.
Bethany stepped inside the room, perusing it for traps and tricks, her hand still firmly on the hilt.
“No tricks, Bethany. I surrender unconditionally.” Sarissa smiled. “Hello, Jovan.”
“Sarissa,” he said flatly.
“And hello, Kiner,” she said.
Kiner didn’t answer.
“Who are the others?”
“Why are you surrendering?” Bethany asked.
Sarissa lowered her arms and sighed. “I can’t do this anymore.”
“You’ve grown tired of killing people, have you?” She didn’t bother to hide the sarcasm.
Sarissa leaned forward and whispered, “We must stop Magic. It is evil and must be stopped. I vowed to give my life to stop it, and I will die to uphold that vow.”
Bethany blinked. “What?”
Sarissa continued to whisper, unable to maintain Bethany’s gaze. Her gaze flicked over the room. “Magic destroys. It possesses. The jo
b of Lady Champion is to stop it. Stop it at all costs. I do not care if she is my sister. I will stop her. She will be stopped. I will not hesitate again.”
Bethany took a step forward and pointed at Sarissa, “What are you doing?”
Sarissa leaned forward and gripped the chair in front of her. She shook her head several times and said in a clearer voice, “Please kill me.”
Bethany looked back at Jovan’s concerned expression. They’d talked about this long ago. If Bethany couldn’t do it, Jovan would. He felt he should be the one to kill Sarissa, and not Bethany—no one should have to kill their own sister. But Bethany wasn’t a coward. She wasn’t going to hide from her responsibilities.
She looked in her sister’s eyes and her throat thickened. “Why?”
“I can’t control any of it,” she whispered. “I stole your Power and it…takes…over. I must be the best Lady Champion. No one must see the fear in my eyes. I am so afraid. What if I’m not good enough? What if I don’t measure up? How will I live if I can’t carry on?”
Bethany closed her eyes as Sarissa mumbled away the quiet truths she’d stolen.
“Doesn’t matter she tried to help. Doesn’t matter. She is evil and she must be stomped out.” Sarissa screamed and Bethany grabbed both of her Blessed Blades in anticipation for the trap. Instead, Sarissa collapsed to the ground and began banging her head against the floor. “Get out! Get out of my head!”
“Sarissa,” Bethany said, unsure what to do. “Sarissa, stop.”
“Get out! Get out! Get out! You are ruining everything!” Sarissa snarled. She looked at Bethany and her eyes were feral and full of rage. “You! Why are you here? How did you get in?”
Bethany took a step back, swords still in hand. Sarissa went back to bashing her head against the floor until her face was a mass of blood. She collapsed into quiet mutterings and moans.
“Sweet Apexia,” Jovan murmured.
Chills spread through Bethany’s body. It would’ve been easier if Sarissa had tried to kill her. So much easier. She’d come here expecting a duel to the death. She’d not expected three distinct personalities warring for dominance.
“Is there anything…” Arrago said, but stopped. “I mean, can anyone help her?”
“I don’t know,” Kiner replied. “Merciful Apexia, what’s happened to her?”
“Magic,” Bethany whispered.
“Bethany,” Sarissa cried out.
The sound broke Bethany’s heart. This was her sister. She’d done so much and she’d suffered so much.
“Please,” Sarissa begged.
Bethany’s hand shook. “Sarissa, I…”
“Please,” she begged again. “Make it stop.”
A strong hand grabbed Bethany’s shoulder. “I’ll do it,” Jovan said,
Bethany looked down at her suffering sister and shook her head. She closed her eyes and tears spilled down her cheeks. “No, Jovan. I will.”
“Bethany, let him do it,” Arrago said. “I’ll do it, even. You shouldn’t do this.”
“I didn’t know her,” Erem whispered. “I can do it.”
Bethany’s vision blurred, but she said, very sternly, “Stay out of this.”
“Do it,” Sarissa said.
Bethany walked to her sister and knelt down next to her. She kept her distance all the while, in case Sarissa held a stiletto or small blade somewhere in her hand. Bethany reached out a gloved hand and touched her twin sister’s blood-stained cheek.
“I love you, Sarissa,” Bethany whispered.
“I know,” Sarissa whispered. “I love you, too. Do it, Bethany. Do it now.”
Lady Champion Bethany stood and wiped the tears from her eyes, but more came to take their place. She sheathed her Blessed Blades and produced one of the many daggers she carried. Bethany stepped behind her sister. Openly weeping now, Bethany wrapped her left hand around to hold Sarissa’s chin still.
“Do it while I’m still me,” Sarissa urged.
“I love you,” Bethany repeated, her voice cracking. “I love you. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”
“Always.”
Lady Champion Bethany executed Sarissa, daughter of Apexia.
CHAPTER 22
Bethany stood over the unmoving form of her twin sister and stared at the prize she had wrought. Blood seeped all over the floor. No one spoke. She wasn’t sure if anyone was breathing. She wasn’t sure if she was breathing.
Bethany closed her eyes, hoping to squeeze out the memory of executing her own sister. But it was impossible. She forced herself to look. This was her doing. All this time, she’d believed the lie that Sarissa was the cause of all their troubles. Now, when it was all fucking too late, she knew the truth.
She was so sure she knew what was right and what was wrong. Now, as Sarissa’s blood pooled around Bethany’s boots, she understood for the first time in her life how ignorant she truly was.
“Beth?” Jovan’s voice was very quiet.
She didn’t answer. She had executed her sister. Again. Only this time there would be no tricks. No sacrifices. Sarissa was dead and she was not coming back.
She felt Jovan’s presence next to her, but he didn’t touch her. “Bethany, are you okay?”
“Eventually.”
It surprised Bethany how calm her emotions seemed. She’d often wondered how she’d feel at this moment. She knew she would hesitate, no matter how much she vainly promised she wouldn’t. Sarissa had been her twin sister. They came into the world together. They should have left it together.
Bethany clenched her jaw against that thought. Uncertain if she could trust herself, she threw the dagger on the table. She tossed her Blessed Blades to the floor, metal clattering against stone. In a few moments, everything would either swirl back in a storm or they would step aside for later.
“What’s she doing?” Arrago asked.
Kiner shushed him. He knelt beside the swords and said, “I’m going to pick them up and put them on the table for you. You’re going to be okay.”
“Um, Bethany,” Jovan said, again, in that quiet, calm voice. “Your nose is bleeding.”
She touched her fingers to her upper lip and was surprised to discover they came back slick with blood. She stared at her fingers. They didn’t feel like hers. Why was she bleeding? It hadn’t occurred to Bethany until now that her entire being was humming inside. Her vision was crisp and clear. Colours were too bright. The edges way too sharp. The hum of Power vibrated inside Bethany and her vision blackened. The panic swelled, but Bethany pushed it down. Her hands shook.
“Bethany, can I touch you?” Jovan asked.
She shook her head, unable to speak. She pushed against the Power that swirled inside her. She recognized it; it was hers. Sarissa really was dead. A sob escaped Bethany. There was no bringing her back. It was done.
Emotions rushed back and punched her in the chest. The Power Sarissa had stolen had returned home. All was restored as it should be. Magic was dead now. The prophecies fulfilled. She looked at Arrago. Elf King indeed. He was sent to be a fucking distraction. If she hadn’t been rutting with him and focused on him, she might have noticed what was going on around her. Apexia had purposely done all this to destroy Magic by killing her own child.
She exhaled a deep breath and screamed, “Are you happy now?”
“No,” came the somber, feminine voice behind her.
Bethany yanked one of the swords off the table and whirled on her mother. She pointed the sword at Apexia. “How dare you use us as pawns in your game? Who do you think you are?”
“The Gentle Goddess,” Apexia answered, with no small amount of irony in her voice.
A bitter sound escaped Bethany. “Gentle indeed. I know what you’ve done, murderer.”
“And how many people have you killed, dear daughter?” Apexia took three steps and stood a hair’s breath away from the tip of the sword. “Will you add one more to the tally?”
The words stung Bethany, but she didn’t let it show on
her face. “I am a soldier. I kill to protect.”
“That is what I’ve done!” Apexia snarled. “Everything I’ve done has been to protect the innocent!”
Bethany moved her sword to point at Sarissa. “She is dead because of you. Drea is dead. Torius is dead. Who knows how many of my friends are dead out there?” Bethany growled under her breath. “You have the gall to call yourself gentle.”
“I’m sorry.” Apexia didn’t break eye contact with Bethany. She held the gaze, and sadness filled her eyes. Gone was the haughtiness that defined the Apexia of old. Now it was just a tired, sad woman who stood in her place.
“That’s it? That’s all you have to say for yourself? I’m sorry, Bethany. I’m so very sorry that I lied to you your entire life. I’m so very sorry that I’ve ruined your life, and that of your sisters.” Bethany spat at Apexia’s feet. She pointed the blade at Apexia’s throat. “I should run you through and do the world a favour.”
“Bethany, stop!” Arrago ordered.
“Why should I?” Bethany didn’t take her eyes off her mother.
“Don’t do it,” Arrago said, his voice quieter.
“She is why Magic still exists in the world. She is the fucking anchor that holds it in place. Her entire existence is due to Magic. She used us to cover that up. If I get rid of her, I get rid of Magic.”
“She’s your mother,” Arrago said very quietly. “You’ve lost enough today.”
“Mothers are supposed to care and sacrifice themselves, are they not? Apexia was never very good at being my mother.”
“Bethany,” Arrago said again, very quietly, “She is still your mother.”
Bethany clenched her jaw, both to avoid speaking and to fight against the hurt that raged inside her.
“I’m not going to try to justify myself,” Apexia said, lowering her head. “There is no justification for what I’ve done. You are absolutely right. Everything I’ve done has been to cover up my own failings.”
Bethany’s sword wavered, but she didn’t lower it.
“I am truly what is wrong with the world,” Apexia whispered. “I tried so hard to fix my mistakes and atone for what I’d done. I can’t control what happens. I can only predict. And I am not wise enough nor intelligent enough to predict all of the impacts my interference would create. I kept trying to fix it, and I kept making it worse. The lives of my daughters, my lover, my people, my friends…all of them, are on my hands.”
Fury (Tranquility Book 3) Page 22