‘I did. Last night,’ he said. Could it have been his landlord’s daughter? They would have to get it ready for the next tenants. But he hadn’t even told them he’d left yet. He still had things to get.
‘What about the cat?’
‘He’s gone,’ he sighed. ‘Joy, I just want to tell you how sorry I am. Can I take you out for a meal maybe, I can explain what happened?’
‘I know what happened!’ she screamed down the phone. ‘You cheated on ME!’
She got louder. Then the phone went dead. He put it down on the bedside cabinet and sighed. It was clear she didn’t want anything to do with him, she was more bothered about the cat than him.
He padded down the stairs on the soft carpet to the kitchen where he could smell breakfast. He smiled at the housekeeper absentmindedly as she placed a plate in front of him. He didn’t see her frown at him as he began to eat without tasting. He was going through the motions as he tried to figure out what he could do to get Joy to just listen to his side of the story. He sipped at the hot coffee, oblivious of the temperature. He could hear the housekeeper stacking plates in the dishwasher. It filtered in, but he barely responded when she said something to him and left the room.
Maybe if he went to see her again and spoke to her in person this time.
CHAPTER EIGHTY-EIGHT: ORANGE
Task: Choose your favourite dessert and make a pig of yourself eating it. You must not apologise. You must eat as much as you can before you throw away any left and if you finish a whole portion, go back for seconds, even if you can only manage a mouthful before you must throw it away. Do not offer any to anyone else.
Robert was not at all sure that Jam roly-poly in the school canteen counted towards his challenge but it was his favourite and he’d explained to the new lady behind the counter it was his birthday so could he have an extra piece. His bowl was rather full and having eaten his usual chilli con carne first he wasn’t sure how much he was going to be able to fit in.
He sat at the teachers’ table with colleagues from different departments. It wasn’t technically the teachers’ table but they sat here every day out of habit.
‘Are you sure you want all of that Rob?’ Lisa Hague from the science department asked.
‘Yes, I am in the mood to indulge,’ he almost sang as he contemplated the pudding.
‘Well go for it,’ Jeff told him. Robert smiled and tucked in, savouring each mouthful as if there would never be another.
Several of the diners stopped what they were doing to watch the happy faces he was pulling.
‘I think I might have to go get some of that.’ Arnold got up and went to the counter. It wasn’t long before there was a queue forming for Jam Roly-Poly, they had to go and get another tray. Robert didn’t think they’d ever had a rush on Jam Roly-Poly before.
He’d been right to think he wouldn’t be able to finish everything but he made it to almost the last spoonful before he had to give in and tip the rest into the bin. He would have liked to have astounded everyone by finishing it and going back for another bowl but he just couldn’t do it. He grinned at those still eating their own portions and wondering what he found so rapturous in his bowl, they didn’t know his was laced with sin. Then he headed back to his office.
Task: Stop suddenly and peer longingly at something you want, gaze longingly at the item. Refuse to be moved. See if you can convince someone to buy it for you or go halves because you simply don’t have the money but you need the item.
He was extremely happy to award himself ten points and noted it in his diary before beginning to read the next part. He wasn’t quite as happy after he read it. How on earth was he going to manage that? He was at the university all day. He put the book back down and, almost sulking because he might not be able to do the second challenge, went to bed.
His dreams were filled with the strangest things, winged creatures circled his head, showering money over him and jewels. He was walking through a wasteland trying to conduct a class excursion about Dante’s Hell and how this land would compare to the opening pages. He woke up sure he’d never slept so badly in his life. Today he was taking a small group to a new exhibition in a local museum. Perhaps he could complete his task whilst they were out.
He dressed, wondering, for a brief but strange moment, whether it was the winged Demons he needed to wear orange for, choosing a bright orange tie and matching socks. As he left the house, in a rush, he forgot about the challenge as he focused on the day.
It was for this reason that the desire for an item surprised him in the gift shop. The book looked so old and ornate, so beautifully crafted. A notebook designed to look like a thick old religious book but it was outstandingly done and which was also, of course, reflected in the price. He couldn’t afford it, but he did want it. He was practically lying on the glass counter, where it was displayed, trying to hide it from anyone who might want it.
‘Sir, please take a step back,’ a woman’s voice said from nearby.
‘But it’s so beautiful!’ he gushed, moving back. ‘I want it.’
‘Then I will get it out for you sir.’ The woman stepped forward and produced a set of keys. The book was on the counter before he remembered he couldn’t afford it.
His colleague, Amanda Lisbon from the university, stood in the doorway grinning. She had witnessed his crazy pudding eating the day before and now she was witnessing more crazy behaviour.
‘How would you like to pay sir?’ The woman asked, reaching for a bag and Robert groaned, he groaned.
‘I can’t actually afford it; the price is phenomenal,’ he whispered.
‘Yes, sir but the paper inside is velum and the whole book was made by hand. The cover is gold leaf and the tooling also done by hand sir. It’s more than simply a notebook, sir, it’s a work of art.’ The woman was giving him a tight-lipped smile.
‘Yes, I quite understand,’ he explained, his eyes never leaving the heavy book on the counter, ‘but I simply don’t have the money to pay for it today.’
‘I can lend you it,’ Amanda offered with a smile that suggested she might burst into laughter at any moment.
‘I couldn’t afford to pay you back.’ He groaned again and sagged against the counter, reaching out to touch the delicate work. The woman tapped his hand in warning, tapped his hand with hers like he was a naughty boy reaching for the biscuit tin. ‘But it’s perfect, isn’t it? You can see that?’
‘Yes quite perfect,’ Amanda laughed. The students were gathering around watching the drama unfold.
‘I’ll put it back then sir, perhaps you could come back when you can afford it.’ The woman began to collect the book when Amanda spoke again.
‘What about halves, could you afford to go halves?’
‘Yes!’ Robert almost screamed, ‘I could afford halves.’
‘I wouldn’t be able to give you anything for your contribution,’ he told Amanda who glanced back up at him, the woman began to pick the book up again with a sigh.
‘Then let’s call it a present.’ Amanda smiled. ‘Can you put half on each card please?’ she asked the woman who now had a genuine smile on her face for Amanda.
‘Of course.’
‘Thank you.’ Amanda smiled as the students clapped.
‘Thank you,’ Robert gushed as he handed over his card. He grabbed Amanda by the arms and pulled her into a quick kiss. It might not have been the best idea but the students seemed to appreciate it. A huge whoop and catcalls went up in the tiny shop. Even the woman was smiling as they left, but he thought that was because she was glad to see the back of them.
And then it hit him, he had completed the second challenge without even thinking about it. His grin, if it was possible, got bigger and he made a strange little skipping step that had the students crowing with laughter and Amanda asking if he was alright.
‘I’m absolutely wonderful Amanda, thank you, one day I will return the favour tenfold.’ And he determined that he would pass the soul game to her when he coul
d share it.
CHAPTER EIGHTY-NINE: ABADDON
The number of human souls forced into holding cells was getting out of hand. They’d had to open some of the oldest ones, the ones that had been decommissioned centuries ago. He’d had no choice. Obviously, they’d cleaned them out and tightened up the restraints but he’d had to split his workforce and his assistant was starting to show the strain.
Dommiel had spoken to a more forthcoming soul. He’d allowed all the checks, the patting down for contraband, answered the questions required of him, and seemed a lot like this was just another day. Dommiel had been concerned that the soul wasn’t aware it had been removed from its body. But as it turned out the soul was so chilled about things that its human form had almost been identical to its soul form. Quite rare, mainly because it meant one of two things: the soul was on its final incarnation, or was a dense soul. He suspected it was the latter.
‘So what happened to you?’ Dommiel asked as if that’s what he asked all incoming souls.
‘There was a book.’ Dommiel nodded and sighed, it was a common response. ‘And a beautiful woman.’
‘I’m sorry, what?’ Dommiel was surprised. Few remembered more than the last few minutes of their existence, perhaps this one had been taken as it tried to accomplish the sin of lust.
‘Yes, a beautiful woman in a red dress. She kissed me. Then I was fired. But she left me a book, the book.’ The soul shook his head disappointed. ‘I thought it was just a book. So, I read it.’
‘Okay.’ Dommiel was confused. ‘That’s what you were meant to do.’
‘No, you don’t understand. I read it. Just read it. Didn’t even attempt the tasks. Didn’t pick a colour. Didn’t believe I even had a soul.’
‘You are the soul,’ Dommiel pointed out.
‘Yes, yes, that’s just semantics.’
‘Right.’
‘Anyway, I guess it doesn’t matter a whole lot now. I’m here, my human body is dead. Where is here exactly?’ the soul asked looking around.
‘Well, er, this is hell.’ Dommiel felt uncomfortable but found his nod of acceptance reassuring. ‘And your human body is still very much alive.’
‘Sorry, what?’
‘It’s alive, you read the book but didn’t play so your soul was taken as payment. Your human body will continue without you in the human world.’ Dommiel felt like this should be a good thing for the soul to hear but the second it was out of his mouth he could see he’d judged wrong. He got a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomachs.
‘How can it go on without me?’ the soul asked. ‘What is it without me?’
‘I guess; I don’t know the answer to that sir.’ Why was he calling a soul sir?
‘How will it be able to make sensible decisions? How will it be able to provide for its family?’
‘Has it got a family?’ Dommiel asked.
‘No, but it…we…planned to have one.’ A stray tear appeared to roll down its cheek.
‘Minos!’ Dommiel shouted, spotting his assistant dashing into the office. ‘Minos, I have a job for you!’ Minos leant back out of the door and wiggled a coffee mug at his boss. ‘It’ll only take a minute then we’ll take a coffee break. I’ll send someone for donuts.’ Dommiel said with a huge encouraging grin.
‘What happens now?’ the Soul asked.
‘Just a second,’ Dommiel said.
‘Yes boss, what can I do for you?’ Minos asked.
Dommiel put his arm around the assistant and in a quiet, conspiratorial voice explained the situation.
‘Oh right, I see.’ He leant around to look at the soul. ‘Yes, of course, I’ll see to that now.’
‘Good chap,’ Dommiel said, smiling at the soul. ‘This is Minos; he’s going to take care of you now.’
‘Ok,’ said the soul. ‘Thank you.’
‘No problem, let’s just get you to your final resting place,’ Minos said, oblivious to Dommiel shaking his head rapidly in his direction. This was why he was still just the apprentice and not running his own section already.
‘If my body is still alive why do I have a final resting place?’ the soul asked.
‘I…I…this way sir,’ Minos said, guiding the soul along the line and throwing his boss a look that said ‘well these don’t happen often’.
Dommiel waved them off. He’d had enough of booking in for today. He walked over the narrow bridge, then took a left where the temperature dropped dramatically. There was something fascinating and grotesque about the souls of Demons.
And as the Demon version of the book had been released, more and more Demon souls were turning up too. He could never have imagined Demons willing to give up their souls– but there were some things even Demons yearned for.
CHAPTER NINETY: ORANGE
Task: Money is your heart’s desire, your passion, your need. Perhaps you could attempt to get a pay rise?
Robert had given the book pride of place on his coffee table where it gave him feelings of guilt and happiness in equal measures, most of the feelings of guilt were about his feelings of happiness. He was twenty points up and today’s task was going to hurt. He’d just had a raise and it wasn’t time to ask for another. How else could he get extra money? He almost crashed into Ginger.
‘How goes it, sir? I see you’ve been reading the book.’ She grinned.
‘Shush Ginger, we’re not meant to talk about it,’ he hissed looking around.
‘That’s the spirit, sir. But as I’ve already completed over half the tasks I can talk about it with you.’
‘Where does it say that?’ he was frowning; sure it was a trick.
‘Further in the book, of course, if you don’t want any advice that’s fine.’ She turned to move away.
‘Are you sure?’ he asked. He needed help with this task.
‘Yes, you’re the reason I get to play again. Well, one of five reasons anyway. Why would I want you to lose?’ she smiled. He couldn’t help think she seemed more confident than she had when he’d first met her.
‘Well, I could do with some help on this one,’ he was still unsure.
‘What day are you on?’
‘Three.’
‘And you’re orange, right?’ she continued when she saw him nod. ‘So you have to get
money? Can’t you just ask for a raise? I’m sure they’d give you one sir.’
‘I had a raise not long ago, I can’t ask for another one.’
‘Oh. well, that’s not helpful,’ she said. ‘There is another job that would get you more money. If you bypassed the hiring system and went straight to the Dean.’
‘What job? And how do you know about it?’ he asked.
‘The University paper said they were hiring a new subject leader; you could do that,’ she said.
‘I haven’t seen that yet,’ he admitted. ‘Perhaps I could try; I don’t want to fail.’
He missed the smile.
‘I reckon if you go now you’ll catch him in his office.’ She smiled encouragingly.
‘Thanks Ginger, it’s great to be able to talk to someone about it.’ He smiled keen to go see the Dean.
The Dean was in his office like she’d said and he ushered Robert to a seat.
‘What can I do for you this morning Robert?’
‘It’s about the subject leader position. I realise this isn’t the normal way to apply but was hoping you’d consider me.’ Robert smiled.
‘The truth is Robert no one’s applied. Most of the teaching staff don’t want the extra work. And the only external applicants haven’t been suitable.’ The Dean sighed. ‘Tell you what, give me half an hour and then pop back in. I’ll make some phone calls and see what I can do. Better to have someone we know, willing to do the job.’
‘Sure.’ Robert was optimistic. ‘I’ll see you in half an hour then.’
The Dean was already picking up the phone as Robert left the office.
The corridor was surprisingly dark and empty and he wondered if the weather had turned. It w
as an old building and could look dark on the sunniest of days, but he’d never seen it empty before. A strange clacking sound made him look up, the wings opening made him take a second look, and the twist of the head made him run. The corridor seemed never ending, far longer than it had ever been, and none of the doors would open.
He kept looking around to find the source of the strange whimpering noises until he felt the first tug and realized it was him. Or at least something in him. The next tug was so violent he lost his footing and hit the tiled floor with his face. The noise got louder and his own panicked wails joined it. He could feel the air moving around him as the creature beat its wings, tugging and pulling at something on his back.
He felt it wrenching, tearing, parting from him. Leaving with more and more ease. Until it slipped away and he realized what it was. They had taken his soul. Somehow he’d failed. But he couldn’t bring himself to work out what he’d got wrong. As he curled into a tight ball against one wall the corridor seemed to lighten and fill with noise. Students and teachers talking to him, asking if he was okay, making phone calls, muttering to each other. He couldn’t understand a word they were saying.
It wasn’t long before an ambulance was called and he was bundled into a wheelchair and wrapped up tight. He kept hearing the word ‘shock’ and wondered whether they meant he was in shock or that he had been shocked. The Dean patted his hand and made words that sounded comforting before they wheeled him away.
CHAPTER NINETY-ONE: PINK
Joy wasn’t sure about today’s task at all. How could she get others to want what she had? She didn’t have anything anyone would want any more. She hadn’t even fully furnished her new, very small apartment. Refusing to kick her friend and her children out of the house she rented to them. But un-keen to force herself on them now that they were settled. She rented a one-bedroom apartment, at the very top of a renovated industrial building. It suited her, but she didn’t think anyone would be envious of it.
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